Title: Falling Against My Will
Summary: Once Castle gets his head out of his ass the hints are flowing, from everyone. Will Castle get it or just be stupid.
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone that has been on the show, I own my characters I add.
Chapter Seven: Hints Flowing Like Water
Castle woke up and saw he had a text message on his phone, he smiled thinking it was from Kate but it was from Lanie.
Lanie Parrish: Roses are red; Violets are blue; Men are clueless; but you are a complete doofus.
Castle: What are you talking about Lanie?
Lanie Parrish: Figure it out Castle I have to go to work.
He got up and heard talking so he got dressed and walked out to the kitchen, fixed a cup of coffee and then walked to the living room where his mom was sitting with a man he didn't know. "Oh Richard come and meet a friend of mine, this is Nicholas. Nicholas this is my son Richard."
The man stood up and put his hand out. "Mr. Rodgers nice to meet you."
Castle smiled. "Actually it's Castle, my name is Rick Castle."
The man looked shocked. "As in the mystery writer Rick Castle?"
"That's me, you're familiar with my writing?"
He laughed. "I'm a fan Mr. Castle, I've read all of your books and I've got to say the Nikki Heat series is really great."
He smiled. "Thank you so much but please call me Rick."
Martha got up with her cup and started for the kitchen. "He has been dating the detective that is the inspiration for Nikki Heat, but after last night who knows what's going to happen there."
Castle looked toward the kitchen. "Mother, don't get into that."
"Richard you broke her heart, face the facts by giving her earrings when she was expecting you to propose and that is what went wrong. You broke her heart, the poor girl."
He looked down at his phone when a text came in from Alexis.
Alexis: Did she say yes dad?
Dad: I didn't propose, and before you ask no she isn't here.
Alexis: You're a moron, I better check on Kate I'll be home later.
Before he could say anything to Martha about that text his phone rang, it was the 12th and Esposito was calling. "Hey Castle, we have a body. You want to meet us there or Ryan and I can pick you up."
"Where's Beckett?"
"She's getting ready and it's on our way but not on hers."
"Well I think I'm going to sit this one out today, I need to write."
"Or is it because of that sick joke you played on Beckett last night? That was mean dude, I wouldn't expect that of you."
"What are you talking about?"
"You know what you did bro and that was just nothing but mean. I have to get going or she's going to have my hide, not in a good mood today." He hung up.
At the 12th later that day
Kate was looking at the murder board when Alexis walked in and over to her, she hugged her without saying a word. "Come home Kate, I know dad made an idiot mistake but I don't think he knows he made a mistake."
Kate leaned back against the desk but put her arm around Alexis. "I was never going to break up with your dad, I'm just trying to teach him a lesson about building me up for something and then letting me down. I thought he was going to propose, I mean he made it the perfect set up and handed me a box that looked like a ring box. Don't get me wrong the earrings are gorgeous and I love them but I was ready to scream yes do you realize how embarrassing that would have been?"
Alexis smiled. "So you're saying if dad would have proposed you were going to say yes?"
Kate nodded her head. "Yes Alexis, I mean we've only been really together a few days but I've been with your dad for years and I know I love him. I know more about your dad than any guy I've ever dated, I'm sure he would say the same about me. We know each other's likes and dislikes, how we like our food, he knows all of my clothing sizes our past and what we want for the future. He knows my favorite color, movie, book, tv show and he knows things about me that I can't really tell you about that no one knows except for him.
"I'm sure he would say the same thing about you Kate."
She smiled at Alexis. "See that's my point exactly and why I thought he was going to propose. He took me to a restaurant that we had never been to before that was highly romantic, candles on the table, a dozen red roses and then he hands me a box that is shaped like a ring box. What am I supposed to think?"
Alexis put her head down on Kate's shoulder. "That he's going to propose? I just don't want you out of our lives, you're not just important to dad but you've become important to Grams and me too."
Kate put her arm around Alexis. "Well you, your dad and Martha are very important to me too. I love your dad very much and this is a misunderstanding, it's not going to break us up so don't get all upset. We'll talk eventually and get it straightened out. Remember I gave up my apartment and I never got it back, I never cancelled that so I still have to move out and I still plan to move in with you, Martha and your dad if he'll have me."
Alexis hugged her. "I'm going to go home and see how dad is doing. I love you Kate, any messages for dad?"
"I love you too Lex. No, I'll talk to your dad when I'm ready I have to get over the embarrassment of what almost happened." She smiled as Alexis walked off.
Back at the loft
Castle was sitting in the living room with the television off just sitting in the quiet trying to figure out how he was going to approach Kate to get her back when a text came over his phone.
Ryan: Alexis was just here talking to her and now she looks really sad, fix it man.
Castle: Did you hear what they said?
Ryan: Yes, when you pulled out the box she thought you were handing her a ring and not earrings. Man she thought you were proposing."
Castle: Damn, I thought it was too soon for her.
Ryan: Not too soon apparently, she's watching me like she knows what I'm doing I need to go.
Castle looked up as Alexis walked in and she looked at her dad as he put his phone down fast. "So dad what's up?"
"Not much, so where have you been?"
"Oh I had a meeting to go to?"
"A meeting huh? How's Beckett?"
Alexis stopped on her way to the kitchen. "Ryan is still your snitch, no wonder Kate calls him Castle Jr. all the time. What did he tell you?"
"Just that you had been there talking to Kate."
Alexis picked up her phone and dialed a number. "Hey dad knows I was there."
"Let me guess, Ryan text your dad and told him you were here. What else did he tell your dad?"
"Dad said just that I was there."
"Well it's not like the two of us talking is a secret, I mean you are like my own child and just because this is going on with us doesn't mean I'm not talking to you. I love you Alexis and I love your dad too."
"I love you too Kate, goodnight." She hung up the phone and walked over then sat down beside her dad. "So what's your next move?"
"I don't know, basically because I don't see either road I take as a win. If I propose now she's going to see it as me feeling forced or backed into a corner and not doing something I wanted to do all along."
"I see your point but like she pointed out to me tonight she still has to move and she still plans on moving in with us. Is she going to be sleeping with you or in the guest room?"
"I'll get this worked out I just have to figure out how to make it a win but I need to keep everyone out of it. It's just hard when I'm getting so many calls and text all day then when I fix it someone says oh he did that because of me, can't it be because I love Kate and I can't imagine being without her?"
"Why don't you just tell her that?"
"I need her to believe me."
"Dad she loves you she just told me on the phone that she still loves you and you still love her."
"It's unreal how much I love her, my world would shatter without her in it. She is my light at the end of a very dark tunnel." He started rubbing his head.
"Dad you have a stress headache take a pain pill and go to bed, I'll stick around here some tomorrow and we'll figure this out. I just have one test in the morning and then I can come home.. I was supposed to have lunch with granddad but I can cancel."
"Go eat with Jim, I'll be fine." Alexis kissed him on the cheek and headed up to bed.
Castle headed to the kitchen, he picked up the headache medicine and took two pills with some water. As he was putting the glass in the dishwasher the door opened and he heard voices. His mother and her friend Nick came around the corner. "Well hello Richard."
Mother you're having a late night." He put his hand out. "Good to see you again Nick."
"We just came from seeing a Broadway Show, is Alexis in bed?"
"Yes mother."
"And Katherine?"
"Not back yet mother and before you ask, Alexis has talked to her and no I haven't. It's not because I don't want to it's because I don't know what to say or how to approach it. I'm going to tell you what I told I Alexis, I don't see anything I would say now as a win for me. If I propose now she would see it as me doing it due to pressure from family and friends and not because I bought the ring almost six months ago, since she doesn't know I bought the ring almost six months ago. I chickened out from proposing when I should have gone through with it, but I thought she would say no and it would ruin us when she was expecting me to propose and I ruined us anyway. Now mother I have a headache and I don't know how to get us back so the fact I haven't talked to her doesn't mean I don't love her it, it means I don't know what to say and I'm afraid to hurt her more."
Nick stepped over to the counter and sat down. "I know I just met you and I've never met her, although I have seen pictures of her on your mother's phone. How about simply sending her a text reminding her that you love her, that's better than no words at all."
Castle smiled. "Thank you Nick, now me and my achy head are going to bed so I'll see both of you for breakfast maybe?"
Martha looked at him and smiled. "I don't kiss and tell Richard."
He looked back from his room and winked. "Well anymore that is, goodnight mother and Nick."
Kate's apartment
Lanie poured more wine. "How much longer are you going to let this go on before you just go talk to him?"
"I figure I'll let it go another day, he knows Alexis came to see me because as soon as she left Ryan text him."
"Castle Jr still at it I see, damn that man is still trying to be in Castle's shadow."
Kate laughed. "It's kind of sweet really, Ryan latched on to Castle kind of quick when he started working with us and when he went away that summer I took it really hard but I think Ryan took it almost as hard. I cried openly but I think Ryan cried at home."
"Esposito told me that he used to have to shut Ryan down from quoting Castle while they were out at crime scenes."
"Oh don't let Espo lie to you, Espo and Castle have been spooky weird at crime scenes too acting alike. There are times it's like I have three little boys there."
Suddenly she heard a text come over her phone and Lanie looked over. "Is it your girl?"
Kate picked up her phone and looked.
Castle: I still love you, always will.
She held her phone up to Lanie and showed her. "No it's Castle."
Lanie nodded. "Are you going to answer him?"
"Well yes, I never stopped loving him Lanie. I just got disappointed but I never stopped loving the man and I still have plans I just have to figure out how to swallow my pride and go back."
Kate Beckett: I love you too, so much. Talk tomorrow?
Castle: I would love to, I miss you baby.
Kate Beckett: I miss you too, goodnight.
Castle: Goodnight.
Lanie nodded. "Well at least you two are going to talk, that's a good thing but what are you going to say? I mean most of your things are packed up so you're still moving right?"
"Yes that's the plan, I promised Alexis that I was and I don't intend to let her down."
"Have you talked to your dad about any of this?"
"I talked to him on the phone today, he's having lunch with Alexis tomorrow they have gotten to be very close. She told me one day she always wanted a grandfather and well it's no secret that dad always wanted grandchildren. They were in the diner yesterday and some guy he knows stopped by his table to talk and Alexis got up and said I'll be right back granddad I need to run to the ladies room. The man told him his granddaughter was beautiful and I guess dad was beaming even though she's not even officially my stepdaughter, that is what he told his friend that she's my stepdaughter but she calls him granddad. Lanie our lives are too invested now I mean look how many years we've really been together and when you have another man's name tattooed on your body, well."
Lanie looked at her and held up her hand. "You say what girlfriend, his name is tattooed where exactly?"
Kate smiled. "After Castle signed my hip I went and had it made into a tattoo, his signature is tattooed on my hip." She stood up and pulled down the corner of her sweats just enough for Lanie to see the tattoo of Castle's name on her hip.
"Does he know? Stupid question of course he knows the man has seen you naked."
"Actually he doesn't know, the few times we've been together I've managed to keep it hidden from him by laying a certain way or something I've just been able to keep it covered. I'm not really sure how to tell him that I took his signature that he thought he was just doing for fun and I had it put on my body for all eternity, that's like a stalker thing right?"
"I bet if you show him the man will be so humbled he will be speechless, I know I'm right."
"I can't hide it much longer, I hope you're right."
"So tell me sex with Castle is?"
"Really Lanie? I can't even describe, I mean talk about an out of body experience there is no way on earth I'm giving that up forever. That man is amazing." Then suddenly Lanie saw tears on her friend's face. "Oh what have I done Lanie, what if I can't get it back to where it was? I love him so much and because of my stupid pride I might have lost the one man I truly love."
Lanie shook her head as she stood up. "You didn't lose him girlfriend, he's been pining for you for years. I've seen him hurting over seeing you with Demming and Josh or any other man you put in front of him. Just like him throwing women in front of you for the same reason, now you're together you just need to work out this little thing. You both have your pride to work through but you'll get there. I need to get home but I'll see you at work tomorrow." She hugged Kate and left.
Kate went to her bedroom and saw Castle's dress shirt from one time he had been there sitting on her dresser, she undressed and put on his shirt. It smelled like him and soon the tears started flowing and she cried herself to sleep.
The loft
Castle's headache was feeling some better, he laid down but couldn't get to sleep so he sat up and started looking around. He saw one of Kate's shirts sitting on a chair in his room so he picked it up and held it in his hand holding it close to his face. It smelled like Kate, it was almost like having her here beside him and soon he felt himself drifting off to sleep.
TBC
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