It appears that the famous Weasley twins have found my story... well, they DO have good imaginations, see if you can find the names they put; Happy Birthday Gred and Forge, and Happy April Fools! Don't worry; the rest of you will be in the next chapter!


So it came to our...

...Attention that...

...You have been bashing...

...And showing blatant disrespect...

...To our most esteemed...

...Enchantingly Garish Wanker. I could only imagine...

...What would our dear mother say...

...If she heard of your insolence...

...Towards the Nosey Whiskered Meddler.

Old McGonagall would have kittens...

...And Hermione would hex you to smithereens...

...If they saw your insults of...

...His Twinkly Grandfatherness. I don't know what...

...You're thinking when you decided...

...To bash the Lemon-Drop Sucker; the Order will...

...Hunt you down for making fun of their...

...Hardly Competent Leader...

...Because Ever-Enigmatic Evasive Elder though he may be...

...They knew of no better Truth-Omitting Arse to lead them (on)...

...In these Dark times. Not to mention what would happen to you...

...If the Secretive Smiling Slime catches the wind...

...Of your unbecoming behaviour...

...And very, very Dark thoughts. No, I won't...

...Definitely won't...

...Like to be in your shoes...

...When the Magnificently Mental Manipulator...

...Decides to search for you. Oh, and your...

...very creative reviewers...

...Aren't safe, either...

...You'll all face the wrath...

...Of Prestigious Goat Rider.

But we'll keep you nice and safe...

...From the Leader of Obtuse...

...While mummy's writing Howlers...

...And Ronnie's blowing fuse.

We might even diss on Dumbstard...

...And sing of all his crimes...

...Oi, Gred, have you noticed...

...That our Twinspeak now rhymes!

(Are you thinking what I'm thinking?)

(You know me well, o brother of mine.)

Anyway...

...'Twas once upon a time...

...By the fire, on the floor...

...That one mummy gave a birth to...

...Ickle-Prickle Dummy-dore.

He was such a precious baby...

...And he always had long beard...

...'Till one day he met his Gellert...

...And decided to disappear.

His mummy was so crying...

...That he didn't play with toys...

...That no girl had caught his fancy...

...And was He-Who-Likes-The-Boys.

But now he's Old as Bible...

...And his beard is snowy white...

...Barmy Grampa, they just call him...

...'Cause he'll never get it right.

Some have thought him mental...

...And some have thought him cool...

...But we have thought him only (together now, Forge)...

...THE BIGGEST APRIL'S FOOL!

WOO-HOO!

Happy Birthday, Gred!

Happy Birthday, Forge!