AN: Thank you all so much for being patient with me. I promise the next update will happen much sooner! Your continuing support continues to mean the world to me.


Chapter 7: Hunger

It's crazy what a single good nights sleep can do for your emotional well-being. What's even better? An entire month's worth of sleeping through the night. This, I'm happy to report, is what life has been like since Peeta and I began sharing a bed again.

When my eyes flutter open, I'm not surprised to discover his steady breathing-signaling he's still fast asleep. I'm almost always the first to wake up in the morning. The hunter in me has always found it difficult to sleep past sunrise, but on mornings like this when it feels so good to be in Peeta's arms, I can hardly bring myself to get up at all.

When we first started to share a bed again, there was still a degree of politeness to the way we'd position ourselves- my head on his shoulder, his arm across my back. But as the nights ticked on, our bodies learned to relax and we began waking up in the most precarious positions- our legs tangled together, my palm flat on his bare stomach, his hands tangled in my hair, my nose presses against his jaw. I hate to admit to loving it as much as I do. The voice in the back of my head begs me to not fall for him any more than I already have, but if my body can accept getting closer to Peeta, it's only a matter of time before my brain does too.

The other things about our new sleeping arrangement? I feel him. In the morning. A lot. Against my leg, pressing into my hip, sometimes right up against my stomach. I thought it would be embarrassing, but really it just intrigues me. Considering how upset Peeta got the last time we kissed, I would have thought for certain he would have mentioned something about his frequently occurring problem. But other than murmuring the occasional "sorry" and shifting his hips away from me, nothing else has come of it.

This morning I wake to the feel on his hands splayed across my middle back, underneath my shirt. I've got one hand wrapped around his neck, softly stroking the hair on the back of his head. I wait to see if he wakes up, but instead he sighs- still deep asleep. Smiling, I lift my head and look down at his face. It's wonderful, being able to study him like this. He's always so attentive with me, so present, that sometimes it's hard to give him the attention he needs.

He really is beautiful.

Ever so softly, I brush a kiss against his lips.

I do this from time to time while he sleeps, just to see what I can get away with. I know one day he'll wake up and call me out on it, but for now it's fun to have these little stolen moments that he doesn't even know we're having. The corner of his mouth twitches, but I can tell by the way that his breathing stays the same he still isn't awake.

I put my head back on his chest, snuggling deeper against him.

Another hour later and I start to get restless.

"Peeta" I sing-song quietly.

"Mmm?" He grunts, still not fully awake.

"You're gonna sleep the day away" I tell him.

"Good" he says, pulling the covers over our heads.

I look up at him, his eyes are still closed but he's smiling. I have to resist the urge to kiss him again.

"Dr. Aurelius says we have to keep busy" I remind him.

Finally he opens his eyes and looks down at me. One of his hands is still half-way up my back and he just seems to notice. He pulls his hand away and smoothes my shirt back down.

"Sorry" he says.

"It's okay" I tell him, rolling myself onto my back. I don't want to move away from him, but he'd just call me a hypocrite if I wasn't the first to get up. I pull the covers back and sit up.

Peeta makes a sound of protest as the light from the room hits his face. He puts his hands over his eyes.

"It's too bright in here" he gruffs.

I lean over his face.

"If you wake up, I'll make breakfast" I tell him.

He pulls his hands away.

"Really?" he asks.

I nod, suddenly noticing how close our faces are. His blonde hair mused from sleep, his blue eyes squinting up at me. The next thing I know, I brush his bangs off his forehead, like I've grown accustomed to doing more and more. My hand lingers on the side of his face and I see Peeta get that look in his eyes- the one he gets right before every time he works up the courage to kiss me.

But before either of us makes a move, however, Buttercup jumps up on the bed and settled himself on Peeta's chest. I pull away, frowning at the way Buttercup looks at me with such contempt.

Moment ruined.

I slide off the bed and move to the door, fighting my current disappointment.

"Looks like someone's jealous" Peeta says with a crooked grin.

I spin around, already on the defensive.

"I'm not-"

"I meant Buttercup" he says.

"Oh. Right" I say as I move towards the door again.

"You feeling okay today, Katniss?" he asks.

"Yeah, I'm just..." I begin, racking my brain for the right word "...hungry."

I'm out the door before he has time to respond.

Despite eating a full meal, I still find myself not feeling fully satisfied a few hours later. As I wash the dirty dishes in the sink, I gaze out the window and see Peeta working in my garden. I can't help but notice his white t-shirt already covered in dirt and sweat. Even though he's lost considerable body mass since the games, I still find my gaze drawn to his strong arms as they work to pull troublesome weeds from the earth.

I can tell he's concentrating hard, because he doesn't once realize I'm watching him as intently as I am. There's something slightly voyeuristic about this scenario, I'm realizing, as I get a small thrill from what I'm doing. At one point I witness Peeta getting a drink of water from the hose and I nearly drop the glass I'm washing into the sink when he moves the hose so the water pours over his head.

I grab a towel from the closet and head for the backyard.

"Hey" he greets, as he catches the towel I toss him "Thanks."

I smile at him as he dries off his face and hair.

"How you doing out here?" I ask.

"Good, come see" he says, offering his arm out to me.

I saddle up beside him as he explains all the work he's been doing to the garden. Whether he's baking, painting or gardening, Peeta really can turn anything into something. We pause in front of the primrose bushes, the ones he first planted when he was released from the Capitol. With his arm wrapped securely around my shoulder, I find myself able to experience the beauty of the primrose bushes for the first time since I lost my sister.

"What do you think?" he asks. I can tell by the tone of his voice he's genuinely concerned about my opinion.

I bump my hip against his, giving him a small yet reassuring smile. To be honest, I've overwhelmed with what I'm feeling and don't trust myself to speak. It's crazy to think about how much time has passed already. A few short months ago I was in a hole so deep I never thought I'd ever pull myself out of it. And even though we've got a long way to go, already I feel myself experiencing emotions I never thought I would- or even could- again.

One of those emotions? Happiness.

"It's beautiful" I mumble "thank you."

A smile breaks out on his face.

"Your welcome" he says, dropping a kiss on my cheek. "I must smell terrible. I'll go take a shower."

"Alright" I say.

I follow him into the house, I realize, like a lost puppy. Or at least a lost cat. I barely know what I'm even doing until the phone starts ringing- breaking me out of my daze.

"I can get that" Peeta calls over his shoulder.

"I got it. It's probably just Haymitch" I respond as I bring the phone to my ear.

"Hello?" I answer.

The voice on the other end almost knocks the wind out of me. Out of shock and nothing else, I find myself muttering short responses like I'm on autopilot. As the seconds tick on, I feel my body slowly start shrinking into myself until I'm curled up on the floor. After a soft "goodbye" I place the phone next to me on the floor and close my eyes.

Fifteen minutes when Peeta jogs back downstairs, I'm in the same fetal position.

"Katniss!" he yells, assuming I injured myself-perhaps even lost consciousness. "Katniss!"

I open my eyes and look at him, but offer no words of comfort.

"Are you okay? What happened?" he asks as he attempts to lift me up. My body is slack, practically dead-weight. He hoists me up until I'm lying across his lap. I feel my hair being brushed out of my eyes , methodically-almost as if he's searching for the answers he hopes are etching onto my face.

"Who was on the phone, Katniss?" he asks me.

I take a deep, shaky breath.

"Peeta..." I whisper.

"I can't help you unless you tell me. Please" he begs.

"My mother" I croak out before I dissolve into a mess of tears.

Peeta carries me over to the couch and lies down next to me. He holds me for the next few hours, whispering comforting words into my hair as I soak his clean shirt with my tears. He rubs circles into my back and forces himself into a labored breathing pattern, waiting for me to follow in suit. Eventually the sobs die down and I start taking the same deep breaths until we're completely in sync with each other. Soon my racing heart begins to level out and my body begins to relax. Out of sheer exhaustion and emotional distress, I pass out with my face pressed into his chest.

Later, when I wake up in the same position, I'm filled with guilt when I remember what happened.

"You okay?" he asks, stroking my hair softly.

I nod, becoming aware of the fact I've been lying on his arm all this time.

"Is your arm asleep?" I ask.

"No" he responds before adding "well, maybe a little. But I don't mind."

I push myself up, allowing Peeta to move his sore arm. I lie back down next to him, so our heads face each other.

"I'm sorry" I whisper.

"You have nothing to be sorry about" he tells me.

A few moments of easy silence pass.

"What did you mother say?" he prods gently.

"She's coming to Twelve. She wants to visit" I tell him.

"And you don't want her to?" he asks.

"No, I do. Of course I do. I miss her so much, but I haven't seen her since...and it will make it all real" I say "When it's just you and me, it's so much easier to pretend."

"Pretend?" the question falls from his lips before he has time to stop it.

"That Prim's not really gone."

This hangs in the air.

"It's important to spend time with the family you have" he tells me.

My stomach clenches at the thought of Peeta, my loyal and caring friend, an orphan to the world. No one is more deserving of a family- of a strong support system to look out for him. And yet all he has is me. According to Dr. Aurelius, this is the way Peeta wants it- to be with me, I mean- but still I can't help but think that he deserves so much more than what I can provide him. Especially in my current emotional state. Here I am crying over the idea of seeing my mother, full-well knowing that Peeta never will see his again. It's not fair.

"You can think of me as part of your family, you know" I tell him.

He watches me for a moment before kissing my forehead, his warm lips lingering.

"I already do" he says.

"And you're part of mine" I tell him.

He smiles at me and I can't help but return it.

"When is she coming?" he asks.

"Next week" I say.

"You'll be ready" Peeta says.

"Is that a promise?"

"It is."


TBC...

Thoughts?