I don't like the way this one ends, but I tried. ^^ hope you don't completely hate it. I don't own iCarly, but I'll trade you a cookie for it! Any takers?? They're homemade!


Great, now I had two bullies. Some new guy named Streak had taken it upon himself to bully me every day after lunch for the past week. Now it was happening again. I was hanging upside down by my ankles and had a lovely view of the linoleum floor, nice and close up, (I could see the chew marks on dried gum) when I heard a noise from behind me.

"Hey! You! What do you think you're doing?"

"Huh?" said the great hulk that was currently using my head as a mop. Jerking me around I saw Sam, or rather Sam's chucks, as she stood up to my bully. "What's your name buddy?" Sam demanded.

"Streak," he said, letting go of one of my ankles to offer Sam a handshake, effectively slamming my head into the floor.

"Oof!" was all I could manage at the time. (A blood rush to the head does not to any good to the vocal chords.)
Sam looked contemptuously down at his hand. "And what exactly are you doing to MY dork?" she demanded.

"What?" Streak asked. Sam pointed down at my now-red face. "You're not too bright there, are you, Spot?" She asked, "Everybody at this school knows, Freddie's MY nerd. No one else is allowed to bully him."

"Well, I'm sorry little lady but I just don't see what you can do about it." I winced in pity for the guy at the look on Sam's face when he said this. In a very low voice, death glare running full force, she asked, "What was that, Sparky?"

"The name's Streak," he replied, "and I just said there's nothing you can do to stop me. He's my chew toy now."

Sam went very still, but I was surprised to see her showing so much restraint. She tried one more time to make the guy let me go. "Put my play thing down NOW and I might not hurt you …as much," she said, almost inaudibly. Streak only laughed, effectively sealing his fate to drink lunch out of a straw for the rest of his life. Right about now is when my vision started going red from all the blood rushing to my head, but after a while I found myself lying on the floor staring up at the ceiling. Sam came over a little after that and offered me a hand up.

"So what was all that about?" I asked rubbing a sore spot on my head.

"Nothing, just wanted the new guy to know your mine."

"I still don't get it," I said.

"You should know by now, Freddie, I'm a very greedy person. You're MY dork. No one else is allowed to push you around but ME! You're my play thing."

"But you're still going to bully me aren't you?" I asked half hoping she would say no.

"I see our relationship as a more cat-mouse thing, not a bully-geek one, don't you?"

"Is that a yes or a no?" I didn't feel like mincing words at the moment.

"Yes. I'm still going to bully you, steal your lunch money, break into your house, take your food, borrow money and not pay it back, hit you, kick you-"


"Okay, I get it. Nothing changed."

"That's my mouse! Maybe I should start calling you Jerry."

"Isn't Tom always to the one to get the beating though?"

"Good point. Mickey Mouse?"

She tried unsuccessfully for the rest of the day to give me a nickname, and finally just settled on throwing cheese at me through the iCarly rehearsal. But a small part of me was okay with that, content with the way things were.


Has anyone ever seen the comedian John Reep? Well, if you haven't you should watch it. If you have, BICYCLE!