A/N: This is probably a one of the most exhausting chapters I've ever written for a fanfic, I should know, I got pretty depressed writing it. Before you guys hunt me down and riot, I'm planning three weddings in this fics, three actual weddings, not including the almost wedding that didn't happen (Three guesses on whose they are? :D).

Anyways, yeah, stuff's about to go down and we're only at chapter 7 :3

Songs featured are 'Beautiful Excuses' by Rixton (seriously, good song, give it a listen to) and 'Ungodly Hour' by The Frey (perfectly sums up Chloe's POV for me, hope it sets the right mood for you guys too)

I don't own pitch perfect.

Beca woke up the next day with a heavy heart, not that she found any sleep at all. In her head, she probably just blacked out at some point. She couldn't even remember how she got into her bed. Her thoughts were still on the argument from last night, and the lingering conflicting feelings that continuously spin her head round and round.

No, she doesn't know what the right thing to do is. She does know, however, what the best thing to do was for her and for Chloe.

They can't keep continuing like this, they won't survive it. And somehow Beca knew that the most important thing of all was for them both to somehow survive this.

Would it be easy? No.

Would it hurt? Yes.

But it was the only way.

Because they had to bend before they break.

And Beca wasn't certain of what the future would bring her, still, a part of her knew, whatever it would be, this was the best course of action to take.

For them to grow and become who they were supposed to be. The best version of themselves.

For Chloe to be happy, and for Beca to find herself again.

It was the only way. Her memories were gone but Beca knew she cared about Chloe. The redhead had sacrificed enough for her already, she's suffered through the last few months of being with someone who wasn't quite the person they loved.

And the only thing Beca knew she could do was to make the sacrifice for her.

I can barely sleep
There's something on my mind
I'm lying in the dark
I'm searching hard to find
For the love that we shared
And the life I left behind
There's only beautiful excuses in my eyes

Chloe had already left by the time Beca got out, and the tiny brunette herself didn't waste much time getting ready. Fitz would be flying back to New York this afternoon and Beca knew he needs an answer, whatever answer she could give.

Beca soon found herself standing at his make shift office for now. Having only recently acquired the label company, Fitz still had his main office at his father's tower in the big apple, and from the looks of it, the city of angels wasn't exactly his favorite city in the world.

"Ah, Beca, come in. I was just about to check if you were already in." Fitz said, looking up from the paperwork all set neatly on his table that morning. "So I take it you have an answer ready for me?" he asked, flashing her his usually brilliant smile.

"Uh, yeah, yeah I do, actually." Beca said tentatively, a part of her still trying to argue with herself.

But she had to.

She had to stick with the decision she's made.

Something's gotta give.

And she knows she's got to give something up.

I can scream and shout
But what's the point? it's done
Don't cry before you learn
Fly too close to the sun
You're starting to lose faith
So hold on to your pride
There's only beautiful excuses in my eyes

It's done.

There was no going back from it.

There was only one thing left really.

Luke was standing outside of Beca's building, looking a little worse for the wear, undoubtedly having already heard of her last fight with Chloe, why else would he have the pained and tired look in his eyes.

"How are you doing?" Luke asked.

"I really don't know." Beca replied. "I'm still all lost, with everything really."

"So, fancy our usual drink?" Luke asked as they started walking towards his car.

"I think tea might be better. I need to calm my nerves and all. Getting drunk would be a terrible idea." Beca replied.

"Planning to talk to Chloe then?" Luke asked, genuine concern in his voice. "Look Beca I know you guys have been going through a rough patch, but comm- "

"Rough patch?" Beca asked, barely able to contain her voice. She knew that Luke had a point somewhere in all of this but she's hated the fact that even he couldn't see what the problem was. Everyone still viewed them as Beca and Chloe, everyone still saw them as together, like nothing's changed. Beca got into an accident and she will be better soon.

But that wasn't the case.

Beca's memories of the past five years had gone. She was better now, perfect health and all, and still the memories haven't returned. It was more than getting better. Beca doesn't know who she was now, who she was supposed to be, and who she wants to be.

And Chloe wasn't living at all. She was constantly hurting and suffering, living in a bittersweet daydream.

"Okay, maybe rough patch is a huge understatement." Luke admitted.

"It is." Beca replied. "Luke, I think we need to talk."

"You do, that's the only way you guys would figure it out." he said, trying to shrug it off and focus on what was important.

"No, I mean us. I've got something to tell you, it's been on my mind for a while, and now that an opportunity arise… look, it's just. I made up my mind on something and I wanted to make sure it's of sound judgement. I'm sure it's what I want to do, but you know?" Beca started to ramble, giving a shrug.

Luke stopped for a second and studied the look on Beca's face. Every line, Beca was sure, showed of the conflict going on inside of her. Her eyes, Beca knew, bore the look of sadness and pain, of confusion and anger.

Luke took a deep breath. "I think tea might actually be a good idea, how about we go grab one first before you tell me what this is about."

"I think that might be a good idea." Beca replied, before once again being entrenched in her thoughts.

She's wrapped up in her thoughts
We haven't spoken in days
She's saying that I've changed
Well she's stuck in her ways
I won't pick up the phone
I've said all there is to say
Gotta be strong
Because it's wrong for me to stay

Luke looked gravely ill after their talk, stopping by a bench near the park on the way to their apartment building. He had his hand on his mouth, his eyes intently staring on the pavement, the cup of tea that they bought along the way set down by his foot, long cold and forgotten.

Beca stayed silent. She still didn't know how to feel about what she had intended to do. She was torn up about it.

She wants to stop it, doing something that unwittingly hurt Chloe. Her lashing out when she's too frustrated. She doesn't want to see her cry anymore, sad anymore, hurt. She doesn't want to cause any more problems.

She wants to see Chloe smile again, be happy.

Even if… even if…

…she couldn't even convince herself to say it in her thoughts. She doesn't know why it hurt so much just to even think it, but it does, and yet she knew, it was the only way.

"You've thought this through haven't you?" Luke finally asked, his voice sounding a little hoarse.

"Most of last night, although, well, I've been kind of pushing it to the back of my mind really. I know at one point we have to acknowledge the problem of our relationship, and how we define it to ourselves. I don't know what to do Luke. I don't know the right thing to do. I just know, we have to stop before we crash." Beca then said, a hint of desperation in her voice.

Luke took a deep breath and rubbed his eyes. Before running a hand through his blond hair, currently being grown out a little. "I don't know what to say Beca. Are you sure?"

"Yeah." Beca replied in a whisper, her voice cracking up.

Beca felt Luke's arm placed firmly on her shoulder. He would do this when they were younger whenever he wanted to silently give her his strength or support and couldn't find the right words to say it.

Because there wasn't really any right words for it now, and Beca knew it. They were living in a situation no one ever predicted could be possible. And now, Beca just wanted to desperately save what she could the only way she knew how.

And this time she was going to face it, she told herself, and do what she thought was best. She wasn't going to simply run and hide.

Too many beautiful excuses
Tell me what the use is
Trying to find a way to come back home
How can we correct this
If we're disconnected
I don't know, I don't know

The walk back from their pit-stop at the bench to the apartment never seemed so long before. Every step Beca took felt like a knife was stabbing her in the heart at the thought of what she was going to do. Dread had started to slowly sink in, and she was desperately trying to grasp at straws to find the strength to get through this.

Because she had to do this.

What makes an angel fall in love?
What makes a good man turn and run?
How do I know if she's the one?

She can't keep selfishly holding onto Chloe when she doesn't even know the reason why. She can't keep hurting her.

Yes, even if she wasn't the reason behind Chloe's smiles, she'd rather take that than see her heartbreaking every time hope had failed her, every time Beca falls short of what she expected.

They can both mend and find themselves again. So that they could live and not merely exist in their frozen bubble of the unknown, frustrations only growing more and more as they keep things bottled up.

She had to make the sacrifice.

She had to set Chloe free.

I've made all the perfect alibis
And I've sugar-coated my disguise
But I can't cover this up with sweet goodbyes, no
There's only beautiful excuses in my eyes


Chloe had been sitting in the dining room for the last ten minutes since she's arrived. She wasn't quite sure what to do next as soon as she got back from work. Of course she called Aubrey that night, how else could she deal with it? Beca had said some things that were true, that made sense, no matter how much it had hurt to hear them.

And truth be told, she wasn't sure how to move forward.

This wasn't Beca throwing a tantrum.

This wasn't her trying to get some space when she's hurt.

And Chloe was afraid they were going to hit a brick wall soon and not survive. Some days were peaceful, some days felt like they were in limbo.

And some days she knew, there were problems. There were the unspoken words that Chloe was afraid was coming.

That had steadily seeded fear and anxiety in her heart the longer it was that Beca's memory failed to return.

Because the more days that passed, the more it felt like the days she had treasured, the memories they've made, the life they've shared.

They were all gone.

As if they didn't matter. As if they didn't even happen.

Don't talk, don't say a thing
'Cause your eyes, they tell me more than your words
Don't go, don't leave me now
'Cause they say the best way out is through

Chloe looked up just as Beca got home. The look in her eyes said it all. She's realized it too, saw that those unspoken words can't stay unspoken forever. They had problems and they need to be dealt with.

And Chloe knew she wasn't ready for it.

"Chloe, we need to talk." Beca said calmly and every fiber of her being knew that her worst nightmare was about to come true. The way that Beca said it, those very words, they were like sharp stabs at her heart, the knife twisting in her chest with each thrust.

And the tears had started coming without being prompted. Chloe nodded as she shut her eyes tight, every ounce of strength in her body was failing her.

"We can't go on like this." Beca said in a whisper just as she crossed the room. She was grabbing the edge of the chair opposite Chloe's and the redhead remained silent. She wanted to make her case, she wanted to believe that there was hope, and she couldn't let her voice fail her.

"Chloe…" Beca started to say again.

Chloe took a deep breath. "Beca…" she said, and even just saying her name was hard.

"I took the job." Beca said. "I'm going to New York."

"And?" Chloe asked once Beca paused.

"Chloe…" Beca replied, she didn't have to say it. She didn't need to clarify it. She knew that Chloe understood what it meant.

"Beca, please. We can make this work." Chloe started to say, tears spilling down her cheeks as she tried to contain a sob. "I know, we probably need to start over again, we just jump in. I don't care how many times we have to hit reset, just, Beca…"

"I can't make you give up everything about your life to wait for me. To wait for something that might never come back."

"Beca, I don't care about that."

"But Chloe…"

I know you're leaving now
'Cause I held on to my way tightly
Stay still until you know
Tomorrow finds the best way out is through

"They can come back or not, but it doesn't change the way I feel for you. It never will." Chloe said breathlessly. She was pleading. She was desperate to save whatever she could save.

"But Chloe that's neither fair or right to you."

"Who cares about fair Beca?" Chloe asked sounding exasperated. "We've been through a lot, this is just another storm."

"Maybe, but we can't survive it together." Beca said it, plain and simple. "We're not even together, together. And I'm pretty sure you know that there hasn't been an 'us' for a good while. And what if my memories never come back? What if I can't find my way back to how we were?"

"I'll remember. Everything, I'll keep all of it alive in my memories. Beca, I… I'll remember everything for us." she said, her voice pleading, reaching out her hand to grasp Beca's tightly.

"Chloe…" Beca said before taking a deep and ragged breath as she tried to stop her voice from cracking up, her own tears, beginning to stain her own cheeks, "…you know that isn't right. We'll end up hurting each other, you waiting for me to return to the way you know me to be, and me from trying to figure myself out. Figure how I fit into your mold."

"Beca, I'm not asking you to…"

"Chloe, I know. But that's how I'll always feel. I won't ever feel enough or right. And I need to figure myself out, figure out who I am now, reconcile my past even if it doesn't ever come back to me again with my present. And if we stay together,… if… we're only going to burn out and you're important to me. I want to stop breaking your heart every time hope fails. I want to stop hurting you because I know you're in pain every day, every day when I'm still not who you knew me to be. Not even close."

"I… Beca, I love you." Chloe whispered softly, the tears continuing to fall. Each word Beca said an even more painful stab.

"I'll keep hurting you if I stay."

Stab.

"And all I could ever want is for you to be happy and smile again."

Stab. Stab.

"I care about you Chloe, but you deserve better than the way I am now."

Stab. Stab. Stab.

"What if I can never love you again the way that I used to?"

Stab. Stab. Stab. Stab. Stab.

"Don't go… please… Beca, this… this can't be the end." Chloe finally said, in between sobs, tears free flowing.

This couldn't be the end.

Because Chloe never for once believed there would be the end, despite everything they've been through.

This was just another storm they needed to get through.

They've gone through a lot already.

There had to be a way to save them.

This just can't be the end.

And I am short on words
Knowing what's occurred
She begins to leave because of me

"I have to go Chloe, for both you and me." Beca said. She was shaking, trying so hard to keep herself together.

She gave Chloe's hand a tight squeeze between tearing her own away, walking into the bedroom for one last time to pack her things.

And with each step, with each pull, Chloe knew that Beca was taking every piece of her heart with her.

Her bag is now much heavier
I wish that I could carry her
But this is our ungodly hour

She watched helplessly as Beca quickly gathered her things, and Chloe understood she had them ready before hand. Her mind was set.

Beca swiftly closed her bags and turned to face the doorway of the bedroom. Standing helplessly as she tried to control her tears too.

"Beca, please. Stay, please. I love you so much." Chloe said, letting it all go now, crossing the room as she pulled Beca into a tight embrace, Beca pressing her head against her shoulder as she sobbed uncontrollably and she could tell Beca was surprise that self at how much harder it was. It was all written in her eyes.

Chloe's grip was tight. She wanted to savor every second of it. If this was the last time she would hold Beca in her arms then she never wanted this moment to end. If this was the last time they'll ever see each other then she wanted to remember every detail of her, her scent, the blue and grey in her eyes, her warmth and the softness of her skin.

She was hoping against all hope that if she never let her go then Beca would stay.

And somehow she could tell Beca knew this as well, because the DJ had to use all her strength to tear herself away from Chloe, to choose to walk away.

To save the both of them, to find themselves again.

And Beca took one last look of Chloe with one last painful breath. "Goodbye Chlo." she had said in a whisper before placing a gentle kiss on her cheeks.

There arms were entwined for a while, Chloe grabbing onto her, but Beca slipped away nonetheless.

And before she knew it, Beca was gone.

She was really gone.

She left and it was over.

It really was the end.

And Chloe was all alone with nothing to do but completely break down and fall apart.

She reached for her phone, dialed the number she knew by heart.

All she needed to say was "Bree…", and the way she had said it, so broken and torn her best friend knew she needed her.

"I'm on my way." Aubrey immediately said before hanging up the phone and Chloe let herself collapse to the floor, her whole world falling apart.

This wasn't the way things were supposed to go.

This wasn't supposed to be the end of their story.

And yet… Chloe's fears had come true.

Beca was gone.


Beca took a sharp breath as she got into the cab. She was leaving immediately, not giving herself a chance to change her mind.

She knew, she did what was best.

But why did it feel like she was dying on the inside?

I've made all the perfect alibis
And I've sugar-coated my disguise
But I can't cover this up with sweet goodbyes, no
There's only beautiful excuses in my eyes

This was the only way they could get through the storm, and yet, saying goodbye to Chloe Beale still had to be the hardest thing she'd ever had to do.

Like an arrow was shot right through her chest. Many arrows, truth be told.

And the tears kept coming and coming.

But she couldn't be with Chloe, not the way she was now.

And so even if it was hard.

She had to take it.

The tears, the pain, and all of it.

And only hope that one day, maybe one day, all would be right again.


PS: I actually wrote chapter 27 ahead of time and I promise you, it's worth the wait (and it features a Beyonce song that I didn't know was originally a song by Jon McLaughlin – but it didn't get into his album and Beyonce bought the rights? Bottom line is, it's a really good song on her 'I Am… Sasha Fierce' album). There are a few good bechloe chapters – that doesn't include heartbreak! – coming up too, but those are scattered in the middle of my roller coaster ride. I can give a snippet teaser at the end of the next update of chapter 27 if you guys need something to hold on to. ;)

Thanks for all the support, reviews, and comments! I'm so sorry for breaking your hearts and doing this chapter, I promise to make it all worth it in the end. Coming up next though with chapter 8 is angst fest part three… so yeah… brace yourselves…