One's True Instincts

Chapter 6

(TMNT CC are AU based on 2003 version, the turtles are 25)
Warning (Rated: T) Disturbing Content, Foul Language, Major Character Death (s), T-cest
Please Don't Read if you don't like this stuff.


His shell firmly against the wall Raph stared toward the ceiling, watching the cast of shadows dancing before him as he found his leg comfortably resting on top of Donnie's thigh.

Donnie engulfed in his work that thankfully wasn't his bio's, though Raph wasn't sure what it was over, he was relieved it wasn't about who he was going to murder next.

It has been quiet these past weeks after Casey's death… or was it murder?

Raph a bit mixed up after the event that unfolded, sometimes confused the situation. In the end, he was just unable to dwell over the unfortunate passing, actually being in good standing with Donnie with this…

Could this be part of the reason why Donnie hasn't made any fresh targets since, was this it?

Was Donnie now satisfied with the current death not to want to bother to continue for Raph was not fighting him anymore?

Raph drawing at straws took it as it came, he was powerless to prevent any more unnecessary life taken. If this was the only way, he could bring this madness to an end, he was content, with sacrificing his freedom for the ones he loves, to live on.

"Raphael," Donnie had suddenly spoken up, looking over his shoulders towards his slowly coming around mate, loving how Raph was comfortable in using him as his footstool in such a manner.

"Huh?" Raph responded, then blink at Donnie with glazed over eyes.

Sighing Donnie's once pleasure over things that were going so well, went south fast leaving him disturbed that Raph still was thinking about the rest that remained and not him.

Jealousy consuming him was an understatement at the moment, yet the turtle held his breath pushing the instincts to take care of this issue by his own hands, coming up with something that would be more promising. He wanted to take a new approach for once.

Standing up and knocking Raph's legs off his, Donnie grabbed his shirt from the back of the chair before placing his hand on the door handle.

Raph seeing those disappointment eyes of his, which normally led to something horrible to come, he panicked rushing to his own feet to stop Donnie.

"Where are you going?!" Raph begged an answer, that sound very desperate, then he wanted it to be.

"I will be back," Donnie left the room, slamming the door in Raph's beak.

"No… no no…" Raph hyperventilated, collapsing onto the bed, who was going to die now?

What did he do? He thought everything was going smoothly? Did he look at Donnie the wrong way? However, he couldn't recall if he showed any signs that he was missing his old life and family and friends…

"Raph gets a hold of yourself," he told himself, "Even though Donnie might be upset it doesn't mean that he would be going on a killing spree, right?"

Sitting up, crossing his legs, Raph placed his hand on his head, wondering when will this nightmare end?

The door briskly opened, as Raph held his breath, seeing Donnie's face beaming with pure joy.

Holding on what was making him bursting from the seams, Donnie didn't usher a word, grabbing some clothes for Raph, who had the habit of staying nude as Donnie called it, when in the room. Other than that, he was required to be dressed, unless someone was coming to visit Raph in their living quarters.

Mostly when that occasion came around, it was doctors checking his vitals and taking blood, for what reasons, Raph didn't bother asking. He even refrained from fighting back to avoid the leash going off.

Tossing the clothes that were a pair of shorts and muscle shirt at the turtle that was so much in the dark and beyond confused, unsure if he should be afraid or not, Raph raised an eyebrow at Donnie.

"What's this?" Raph questioned.

"Put it on and come with. You're going to love this," Donnie tried to hold in the excitement.

"I hardly doubt it," Raph mutter under his breath, putting the clothes on to follow Donnie like a good little turtle.


The large room boomed with life while a bunch of men shook the room with their rising volume. It was not in terror or anything alarming like that, but laughing and playful to the extreme.

"Ummm, why are we here…" Raph asked quietly, feeling awkward walking into this place that was obviously occupied by a bunch of humans.

"To play basketball Raphael. It is an activity room after all, and you need some exercise anyways,"" Donnie walked inside with no hesitation and oddly the humans that were playing ball, gave no sign of alarm they were there.

"But…" Raph complained, standing at the door bashful; he wasn't used to being around humans that he didn't know and this was weird on so many levels. Not including the fact these men all worked for Bishop, and he recognized a few on the firing squad the night he tried to escape.

"Raphael…" Donnie turned his head, to encourage him not to be afraid.

"Hey Donatello, is he the one you said that wanted to play?" one of the guys asked, throwing the ball to Donnie.

"Yes," Donnie admitted, seeing one of the other players smirk in response.

"Well, this is no competition; we are going to win then! He doesn't look like he knows how to even dribble a ball. Hell, he probably doesn't even know what a hoop is," another man went on mocking the shy turtle, getting the stink eye from Raph.

"I know how to play fucken basketball, shit face," Raph snarled, seeing the guy laugh at the hostility, putting his hands up in surrender.

"Chill out turtle, if you can…, then prove it," the smug player came up taking the ball from Donnie, who allowed it knowing this was the key to get Raph out of his shell and take part.

Tossing the ball at Raph, he grabbed it with ease, throwing it to the side getting it into the hoop without breaking a sweat.

Nodding in amazement the guy beamed, clapping his hands together being more a jerk then trying to compliment Raph, "Not bad for an amateur,"

"AMATEUR!" Raph growled stomping forward to put his beak in the guys faced that didn't flinch on Raph's demeanor.

"You heard me man; you're an amateur; you scored on your own net," the man burst out in laughter seeing Raph turning all shades of red.

"He is right Raphael," Donnie agreed, pointing to the opposite net, "That is the one we are trying to score in."

Rolling his eyes, putting his hand on his head, Raph became flustered, "How the fuck was I to know that?"

"Easy… you do now, now let's play ball," the guy informed the others, it was time to get this game going.

"I'm not playing," Raph put his foot down as one guy suddenly curse over Raph's unwavering stubbornness, pulling out his wallet.

"Damn it I knew I should have bet he wouldn't play," the man barked, pulling out a fifty and gave it to the man who was running the game by the looks of it, and was having a blast in pushing Raph's buttons so far.

"You bet if I was going to play or not?" Raph asked not believing this.

"Well, the real bet was over if you would play and if you even were able to play a full game without being a washout," Donnie shrugged, as his face twisted seeing the human held his hand out waiting for Donnie to pay up.

"And you bet too?" Raph asked.

Nodding Donnie sighed, "I said you would play a whole game… But I guess I was wrong about you on this. I truly thought you would be an asset and help my team to finally kick these other jerk's asses… I guess you're not as good at playing basketball as I had mistaken you would be..."

"Donatello I didn't say I wasn't good… I… rrr. FINE!" Raph gave in, slapping the guy's hand away to show the bet wasn't won yet.

"Well then let's play!" Raph ordered, seeing how this made Donnie happy.


Sweat dripping down his oily green skin, Raph collapsed to the ground feeling Donnie using his shell as support.

It was a rough game yet in the end, they were victorious and both turtles now hit their limit.

The funny part was through this scenario was so very odd, he actually had a lot of fun, being able to loosen up and was even caught letting out a genuine laugh.

Hell, even the humans was having a ball complimenting in the end how that was an awesome game, and they should do it again another time.

"Did you have fun, Raphael?" Donnie wheezed passing the water bottle over, watching the last player leaving the room, that gave them the place to themselves.

"Yeah…" Raph said, feeling guilty suddenly. As it hit, he hid it quickly, to avoid the brother's alarms going off like fireworks.

Feeling the abrupt shift behind him, Raph almost jumped when Donnie's arms fell down his shoulders holding him tightly.

"Raphael be happy," Donnie begged, then barking some order.

Not answering him, Raph couldn't, he knew lying to Donnie would end badly.

Sitting there in the silence, Donnie leaned his head against Raph's shoulder, whispering into his ear, making the turtle shiver in horror over Donnie's words that were calm, "I think its time I end her life, tonight."


His heart ache, with his head that pounded like thunder, while he warned out the floor under his feet.

Not even two hours ago Donnie proclaimed he was going to end her life. Who was he talking about? The list of names rushed through his head and for the life of him; he couldn't conclude which female friend Donnie was targeting now.

"Damn it. What did I do wrong!?" Raph slammed his fist into the desk, feeling the sting of helplessness consuming his very soul.

What was it that triggered Donnie to think he had to kill someone? So what he was silent and a bit guilty for having fun? He was a prisoner here, and he was having a great time, why wouldn't he be guilty? That wasn't an invitation to murder someone!

Having the walls closing in, he clenched onto the still sweat soaked shirt he hadn't removed, trying to breathe, which wasn't working so well.

The door creaked open, Raph flashed a look over becoming speechless as his face turned pale realizing it was Bishop.

It has been a while since the disgusting human dared to show his face around him, and now of all times, he was making a house call?

Raph wouldn't put it passed this devil, that he probably has been watching in the comfort of his own room with a side of popcorn, this movie of his unfolding in his own sick amusement.

"What do you want," Raph growled heavily, then stop as a female figured walked in.

Flabbergasted over who this was that just strolled in, Raph's hands tremble and his voice strained out the name, "APRIL!"

The human friend surprised at seeing Raph here of all places, moved forward quickly, ignoring Bishop and wrapping her arms around him to greet him, "Raph… we thought you were dead!"

"Shit, I'm sorry I…" Raph tried to explain, only to have Bishop coughed to interrupt this touching reunion.

Narrowing his eyes, Raph quickly moved April behind him to protect her, "What sick game are you playing now, what are you planning to do with her?"

"To higher her for her expertise," Bishop answered innocently.

"Bull shit!" Raph barked only to freeze when April confirmed it was the truth.

"I am here for that reason Raph…" April said removing herself from Raph's protection that she didn't need.

Staring at her dazed, Raph's jaw drop not believing she was seriously accepting a job from this nutcase, "April why?"

The female's expression was grim; she avoided those fiery golden eyes that judge her for being an idiot for doing this. Shuffling her feet, she sighed, not bothering making some lame excuse getting right to the point, "For it was that or my family members and Casey's, would pay the price."

Flashing a glare of anger towards Bishop, Raph was inches away in punching him, "You blackmailed her!"

"Do you prefer that Donatello taking her life instead? That is the other option for he is dead set in killing anything that was connected to you. However, if she was part of my team Donatello will let her death slide seeing her an ally, then prey," Bishop pointed out.

Growling Raph flung his hands in the air taking a seat on the bed, staring at the floor, flooded with the mixed feelings, not sure what he was truly feeling over this.

"Raph…" April tried to reach him, only to have the turtle suddenly retreat from her coming hug that was to comfort him.

"Get out," Raph snarled, falling into a foul mood, not daring to look at April. The one thing he did acknowledge inside this mess of emotions swarming him was that he didn't want to see her face anymore. She just reminded him of some sell out, giving up before bothering trying to fight.

"Raph…" April begged only to have Raph snap a disgusting glare at her.

"I said get out of my room!" Raph yelled at the human that became flustered by how rude he was. She was accustomed to Raph mood swings and sharp temper, but he has never in his life talk down to her in such a manner.

"Raphael! It's not like I wanted this! I had no choice don't you understand!" April found herself brooding in her own anger, snapping at the turtle that was being a child and not seeing that she had a responsibility towards her family and Casey's. She had to protect them like he would do anything to protect his own family.

"You did have a damn choice and shell; you ran instead with your fucken tail between your legs!" Raph roared in return, slamming his fist into the bed.

"RAN! So you're saying I should have let them kill everyone I love to make some stand?" April asked horrified he would suggest that.

Rising to his feet, Raph pointed his thick green finger at her face, "You could have found a way around it. You could have gotten Leo's or Master Splinter's help! You had that option before you! And you didn't do a fucken thing!"

Slapping the turtle in the face, hot tears ran down the frazzled female's cheek, "Oh and like you done anything to prevent Casey's death! R-A-P-H-A-E-L!"

Clenching his fist, Raph grind his teeth, outraged, she turned around blaming him for Casey's death, "I HAD NO CHOICE! It was you or him!"

Seeing that his reason wasn't good enough for the stressed friend who was all shades of red and white, Raph snarled more to prove he wasn't sitting on his damn shell all day with his finger up his ass. He tried to do things and failed every time.

Huffing more Raph narrowed his eyes at her, "You know what April, do you fucken think I haven't tried to leave? You think I haven't tried to stop this shit! Do you really think I wanted my family and friends to die! Damn you! Look what happened when I do leave!"

Raph stumping past her in a cloud of fury, he walked pass Bishop, who was watching this spectacle in amusement.

Thwarted, Raph didn't hesitate to set one foot outside the door, to be overcome by the leash that went off as his body jerk in agony while he grabbed his head screaming his lungs out.

Instantly as it happened, April rushed forward only to have Raph refuse her so-called help, crawling with what strength he could muster, back to the room to finally have relief from the pain.
Laying there wheezing for air, Raph stared toward the ceiling for a moment, then got back to his feet, noticing Bishop had left and April was still there yet outside of the room now.

Rolling his eyes at her, he ignored her entirely, not caring what she had to say next, slamming the door in her face.

Speaking under his breath before the door defined his insult, Raph spat the curse, "Bitch" with no remorse.

Feeling the satisfaction of his actions, he wandered away from the door, going to his bed to take the nap that was most needed. Though he proved his point to the stupid woman, his only regret was how much his body felt like jelly, and his head was on fire, wishing he didn't have to resort in activating his leash to defend his actions so far.


Donnie Pov

Entering the room after a long hunt that ended him not taking the life of that particular female he had his sights on, wanting to see her blood being soaked in that butt-ugly carpet within her apartment, Donnie had to quench his blood lust elsewhere.

The other female, Angel wasn't much worth the time when he was done with her, but he had to admit the look she had on her face drawing her last breath was priceless, when he honored her by removing his mask. A signature he had been using with every kill, it was amusing how his victim's eyes would widen in disbelief gurgling in their blood to speak, yet to freeze in that pose, as time stops for them.

Suspecting Raph to be sitting there bored or trying to attempt to read his files, Donnie notice he wasn't there, as his eyes wandered towards the bathroom?

Taking off his gear to get it washed like routine, Donnie came up to the bathroom's door that was wide open. Peculiar this was; Donnie had a sickening feeling come over him.

Raph normally closed it if he wanted his privacy, and it wasn't like him to leave it open so inviting.

What else came alarming was the trail of clothes that led inside. Following them, Donnie entered the room, noticing Raph was in the bath not moving an inch.

There was a heaviness in the room, and a strong overwhelming scent of despair filled the air, making Donnie wonder what happened when he was gone.

He still wasn't upset when he left to do his work, was he?

Walking up to the bath, Donnie was going to tell Raph what came of April O'Neil only to see Raph was fast asleep with the ice-cold water knee high wrapping around him.

Sighing in relief and letting out a light chuckle at how cute he was, Donnie leaned forward to empty the bath, gathering a towel ready to use.

Slowly taking the towel, he dried the sleeping turtle that didn't fidget as he did. He was out cold, and there was evidence he was crying as well.

Once he dried him off, Donnie placed his arms in the correct position to lift Raph up without startling him. He could have awakened the turtle and drag him to bed, but he looked so peaceful, regardless that he was shivering from the cold.

Raph not much a burden to carry, Donnie placed him in the bed, wrapping the warm blankets around him then reentered the bathroom to wash up. This time around, he didn't get much blood on him, and it didn't take him long to get all clean for bed.

Entering the bed, turning off the lights, Donnie couldn't stop the sigh that came over him as he gazed at that magnificent shell. How much he longed to touch it, to even touch him to express his devoted love for him. So much he wanted to nuzzle his beak in Raph's neck, letting out his scent to soak into Raph's skin to mix into a fragrance like no other.

Alas, he couldn't, he wouldn't push it, no matter what his instincts told him to take him as his own regardless he was ready or willing.

Feeling the wave of defeat that clashed against his throbbing heart that wanted to be loved, Donnie turned around unable to stare at that shell any longer.

He needed to keep a control of himself in order to make this work.

Then to his surprised a cold arm searched for his heat, clinging onto him for dear life.

Looking over his shoulder Raph was still fast asleep, yet he sought him out, nuzzling his beak against Donnie's neck letting out a few pleasurable churrs.

Smiling sweetly, though Raph wasn't conscious of his actions, Donnie took it as a sign.

He was starting to be truthful with himself and allowing himself to take what he wanted… Him.


TBC