Thanks so much to every one that's read and especially if you've reviewed, it really does make me happy! Also, to anyone that's wondering, yes I have recently become obsessed with Frank Sinatra and his music is getting in to pretty much all of my stories. As ever, enjoy and review!
Not much else happened that weekend, well Harry came out as gay to Hermione, who assured Harry that she was totally okay with it, and in fact had known the entire time.
Actually he was just sitting down at the Gryffindor table with her, giggling about Malfoy's bum, which was very nice indeed. "even if the prat himself isn't." Harry said, when Harry had a thought. Maybe he could invite Severus to spend Christmas with him in the chambers.
It was only a week away, and his friends would be leaving tomorrow. He thought he should try, at least, and so he sent an invitation, more nervous than he felt he had a right to be.
Thankfully, Severus accepted and so after he said goodbye to his friends the next day, Harry set to work making the chambers as festive as possible. He got an actual tree from Stella, who he was now getting on with very well. When he asked why she hadn't talked to him earlier she said simply; "you always bought your letters with you, and so had eyes for nothing else." Pretty cryptic really, but that was Stella.
He decorated the tree in red and silver, enchanting it to smell slightly of cinnamon, Harry's favorite. He found he really enjoyed decorating and so set to work on the rest of the rooms.
Severus wasn't so sure about the whole thing. The night before the students left, he asked Draco up to his rooms, to discuss it.
"I mean, should I get him a present or something?" He asked nervously. "what if he doesn't? and what if he does, and I don't like it? And I supposed to lie?" "yes." Draco said firmly. "lie. Tell him you love it no matter what it is."
"now, as for what you get him, you should bring him a bottle of red wine as a sort of thanks for inviting me gift as well as a Christmas present." Draco stated. "I also highly doubt there will be anyone else there, so it shouldn't be too stressful for you, I know you don't like crowds. As for what you should actually get him, it should be thoughtful, and not offensive, and it needs to be…" As Draco continued on his rant, Severus looked at him nervously. He wasn't sure this was a good idea.
"So maybe something quiddich related." Draco suggested. "if I were you I would buy him…hmmm, oh I know, could you make him a warming potion , right, for when he's playing in the rain but the problem with those is that you often get too hot under all the quiddich robes and it's easy to lose concentration, some players have even passed out from the extra heat. You're a potions genius, I bet you could make him something that could keep his core body temperature stable. I've never heard of anything like it before, but you could do it, right?" Draco finished- finally.
Severus nodded. There were potions like that to be honest, but they were used only in medical emergencies, if someone had fallen under ice or something, and they made you pass out. But yeah, he could put something together that would work for Harry.
Severus bit his lip, "and you think he would like it?" Draco nodded, over joined to see his god father so worried about Harry's likes and dislikes. It was good for his plan.
"so that, and, did you say I should bring him some wine?" Severus asked, Draco nodded, ready for resistance. "Oh Draco, he is under age, and I'm his professor, I really shouldn't-"
"listen." Draco said. "for one thing, I'm sure it wont be his first drink. For another, its not like you will get drunk on one bottle. And its polite." But the most important reason was one Draco was not included to mention; giving wine would show that Severus was treating harry as an adult, something that Draco knew Harry wanted and deserved. It was also just slightly flirtatious.
Because Draco had decided that come hell or high water, these two would get together. He wasn't going to interfere too much, just a nudge when they needed it. And they needed it.
So that's what Severus did, he created the potion, not too difficult, and bought the wine.
Harry was having a little more trouble. Probably because he didn't have someone just to tell him what to get Severus. He thought about a book, but he figured that since Severus still had the books from Salazar's library to look though, he had more than enough for the moment.
He also had no idea what other potions supplies he needed, so that was pretty much out of the question, which was a shame because Severus was so passionate about potions…
Hmm…
In the end Harry decided to give him a gift bag of a few small things. He bought a small box of truffles, he guessed that while Severus wouldn't enjoy sweets, some rich, dark chocolate wouldn't go amiss. He also bought him a book in the end, just because he knew how much he loved them. He bought The tenant of wildfell hall, by Anne Bronte. Really he only got it because he knew it was a "classic" and Severus seemed like that kind of guy.
Lastly he added a Frank Sinatra CD. He wasn't totally sure why he picked that one in particular, but he just had a feeling Severus would like Sinatra. Again, he was like dark chocolate, smooth and deep and velvety a little sweet and a little bitter…and a little like Severus himself.
Harry wasn't so sure about his present, to be honest, but he was really excited about Christmas. For some reason, it felt like his first real one and it kind of was. It was the first one that he felt like he was having at his home, not that he didn't love the weasles, but he had decorated his place and it was only him and Severus and it felt so much more relaxed, more his.
They had decided that Severus would come after Christmas lunch and stay the night, which felt oddly like a date to Harry but he had no idea why.
Christmas lunch, as always, was amazing. The hall was beautiful and everyone was in good cheer. But a part of Harry was just waiting for it to be over. They walked down from the great hall together, happily insulting professor Flitwicks new hat.
"wow" Severus said when they walked into the chambers, now that Harry looked at it though someone else's eyes, maybe he had gone a little over the top with the decorations. "red and silver, house colours combined, how….politically correct."
Harry couldn't help being a little upset by this lackluster description, but Severus wasn't paying much attention. He was holding out a bottle of wine and looking slightly embarrassed. "I um…thought you might like this. You know, um" now it came down to it, he couldn't quite remember what Draco had said he should say; " I well, wanted to say thank you." He prayed Harry wouldn't ask what for, because he didn't know exactly.
But Harry didn't, instead he smiled that wonderful smile of his and just said; "That's so nice of you, thank you, you didn't have to, really." But sometime later harry was still grinning and Severus was silently thanking Draco, promising to never doubt him again.
Severus had one of the most enjoyable Christmases that he could remember. They loved each-others gifts, despite the fact that Severus already had a copy of the book Harry got him, but it was such a nice thought he really didn't care.
It was a very pleasant evening all round, and both of them enjoyed it immensely.
But when Harry got into bed that night, it just didn't feel right. After a bit of searching he found the problem, he felt guilty, not just because here he was, enjoying another Christmas, when so many people never would, (although that was defiantly making him feel bad) it but because he was enjoying it with Severus. It was bad enough that Siri and Lupin and his dad would never enjoy themselves again, but did he have to…betray them like this?
He felt so conflicted. All he knew was that his father and his friends had really hated Severus, surly there had to be a reason? But Harry just couldn't figure it out. He had hardly been Severus's number one fan over the years, but now….Harry couldn't even imagine it.
After an hour or so of trying to go to sleep and failing, he got up, deciding that a hot chocolate was in order. He didn't bother putting a top on, figuring Severus would be well asleep by now.
He wasn't, he was sitting in the kitchen, nibbling at some of the left overs. Harry tried to turn around and leave quietly, planning to come back when he was fully clothed, but he must have made more noise than he planned because Severus turned around and locked eyes with Harry. Harry grinned sheepishly. Figuring the damage had already been done, he walked back into the room saying; "can't sleep?" Severus cleared his throat and shook his head. "yeah me neither." Harry moaned.
Severus felt butterflies in his stomach and God it was strange… Harry certainly had a beautiful body. Tanned and toned and- oh my god his nipples were erect. Did that mean another part of his anatomy was erect? Severus bit his lip, God he wanted to get laid…But Severus was bought out of his inappropriate musing by a sniff from Harry.
"Are you all right?" Severus asked cautiously. "yeah I'm fine." Harry said sadly. " I just…oh I don't know. " he threw himself in to the chair across from Severus and sighed. "I've had a great Christmas I have no reason not to be happy, but…" Harry sighed and looked at the table.
"but?" Severus prompted.
Harry wanted to tell him but how could he tell Severus that he felt guilty for spending time with him? He couldn't. So instead Harry went with;
"I just feel really conflicted, feeling that my mother would have wanted me to be one way and my father another."
Severus understood what he meant.
It was really nice to be able to talk to someone about all this stuff, Harry thought. Someone that understood, someone that was so surprisingly nice. And good looking. Harry didn't know where that thought came from, but he went with it. Severus had these pretty pink lips and Harry suddenly felt the urge to find out just how soft they were…
But suddenly he stopped speaking and Harry relised he hadn't caught a word of what he had said. "umm, yeah." Harry said, hoping to get away with it.
"you agree?" Severus said, a little confused. "umm…I think so. Maybe, I mean, if you do."
"you weren't paying attention were you?" Severus accused. Harry blushed, god it's hot when he does that, Severus thought suddenly. "sorry." Harry said.
Severus rolled his eyes and made his point again. At some point over the course of the evening they opened the wine and put some music on, the two of them inching steadily closer.
