Chapter 7: "Nebula"
Shielding my eyes from the hot sun, I squinted up at Q. "Go away! I have to find my Father," I snapped. Why did Q have to show up when I was on a most urgent mission? If I didn't convince Father to come back home right away, he'd leave us forever and I'd never have a family again! I turned away from the nuisance, scanning all directions as I wondered which to travel.
"Your Daddy has no intention of walking out on his family." Q waited patiently until I returned his gaze. As he smiled at me, I tried to determine whether he was sincere. Surely, he wasn't going to pretend to care for my Father after everything they had said about one another. "For all his shortcomings, Daddy is incontrovertibly loyal to his family and his starship." He flashed out and flashed back in front of me. "He can't offer you what I can, though: an eternal life, games and puzzles of the mind. Galaxies would be your playgrounds. I'd even let you choose one for your very own."
Why did he insist that he could out match my Father's love? "How many times do I have to tell you that I don't want anything you have to offer? I want to stay with my family."
Q placed his hand on his chest in mock pain, letting out a sickening moan. I didn't believe he was capable of feeling pain-just inflicting it. He was able to mask a great deal of his mind from me, but he couldn't have shielded pain. "Then all this nonsense about being starved for adventure has been a facade? You've found comfort in your stale existence on a starship. My, my. And here I thought you were bored."
"Well, actually..." Wait! What was I saying? Was I about to admit to this obnoxious entity that I wanted the adventure he offered? Father would blow a warp core if he knew I was talking with Q.
He leaned toward me, expectantly and whispered. "Yes, my dear child?"
"I'm not your child!" Balling up my fists, I let out a growl. I didn't want to deal with this!
"Oh Shannara, don't let yourself grow feral like Microbrain. You may have been born half Klingon, but you've outgrown such confines. Your potential is far beyond what you've realized. You're better than the sum of your two parents."
I bared my teeth to spite him. Maybe if I acted too much like Father, Q would lose interest in me. I almost lunged at him before realizing it would have been a stupid move. What harm could I inflict on a being like him?
"You are my child. Why don't you admit it? I am your Father. I created more than you." Q spanned his arms. "I created this entire universe you live in-just so you could exist."
"Then why did you let me be born to Worf, son of Mogh, if you hate him so much? Why make me Klingon at all?"
"I had no choice. . .I needed Deanna Troi to be your mother and she insisted on mating with Worf."
"I don't understand," I said as I yawned. My bedtime had been quite some time ago. Maybe Q would think I was bored with him and go away. Yeah right. If he wouldn't go away, then I might as well attempt to get some answers from him. "Why would you bother? Wouldn't a being like you have more fun wreaking havoc in any universe than playing father to a little Klingon girl? I don't look like you. I don't act or think like you." I raised my voice. "And I certainly don't want to be you!"
Suddenly, Q's appearance altered as ridges formed on his forehead and his hair grew below his shoulders. "I can appear as anything I wish and so can you. The mind is the biggest universe of all, Shannara. You are my greatest challenge. I don't expect you to become me or to mimic me. Thinking for yourself and taking the initiative, that is the true sign of intelligence."
If he meant winning my loyalty was a challenge, he certainly had that right.
"Are you really that powerful?"
"I'm omnipotent. With a snap of my fingers, I could cause a star to go super nova, send a starship thousands. . .millions of light years away, open temporal anomalies or as in your case, create an entire universe."
"In seconds?" Why did I find this so hard to believe? "Prove it to me."
Q's wicked grin, baring sharp Klingon teeth, made me wish I could have taken back the demand. How would he prove it to me? Had I unwittingly given him permission to send me on a tour of some parallel universe? What if he didn't bring me back?
"I would be delighted," he said and with a snap of his fingers, he sent us into the unknown.
Floating in lavender clouds, I was weightless. "Q!" I screamed. The volume of my voice startled me. Data had told me that sound did not carry through space. Frantically, I searched for Q. Had he abandoned me? What could this place or Q's absence possibly prove to me? "Q, show your face now!" I exclaimed. If he thought he could win me over, this wasn't the way to do it. "This doesn't prove anything."
"On the contrary," Q replied flashing in front of me in his usual form. "It proves everything."
I pondered this riddle, sure he wouldn't provide the answer.
"This place looks like the inside of a nebula." I remembered the pictures Commander Data had shown me of various spacial anomalies and the reading he had assigned on nebulas. Did Q somehow know that I had a strong desire to see and investigate such anomalies? I'd never imagined myself floating inside one though!
"How obtusely scientific you've become." He leaned down to speak low in my ear. "Why watch anomalies from your viewwindow when you can create them. Admit it, you find it more intriguing to explore them like no oxygen-breathing mortal could."
I brought my hand to my mouth, only now becoming aware that I was not breathing. And I wasn't suffocating or becoming lightheaded! "Where are we? I mean, are we still in the same galaxy? The same universe?"
"We are precisely eleven thousand meters above your beloved starship, if you must know. I created this anomaly for your benefit. The little insects below are scurrying about trying to understand how a purple cloud suddenly formed out of nothing."
"Did you choose this proximity because you couldn't resist playing a game with the crew or are you trying to explain the mysteries of the universe to me?" Data taught me that word, "proximity." I thought I sounded more mature choosing it over "closeness." Was I impressing Q with my vocabulary? "How do you explain the universe? Can it be defined?"
"Certainly, you can determine something so elementary with your own resources." He tapped his finger against my forehead. "I'm merely offering you the opportunity. Given the initiative, you have the power to understand the nature of the multiverse. The threads are at your fingertips."
I wanted to ball up my fists and pound them into Q. No wonder my parents despised him so much! Yet instead of charging at him, I floated away, seeking out my answer as he had suggested. I used deductive reasoning as Data had taught me and analyzed the situation. What were my senses telling me? I could see, obviously, and hear well enough to argue with Q. Those senses, thus far, hadn't revealed any answers. What did I feel? I reached out and ran my hand through the purple mist. It was like running my hand through a hologram. After examining my hand, I concluded that the nebula had no physical effect on me. What did this mean?
I turned. Q was staring at me, impatiently tapping his foot soundlessly against the void of space. This probably seemed so simple to a being like him. Why was he playing this game with me?
"I don't want to play this game anymore!" I exclaimed. "Send me back to the planet, so I can find my Daddy."
"Send yourself back," he countered. "You've had that ability since the day I introduced myself to you."
Could I just wish myself back? I concentrated on this notion, imagining myself back on the planet. I took a step forward. My foot hit solid ground and I stumbled. After recovering and wiping the dust off myself, the solution to Q's puzzle suddenly came to me. There was one way for him to prove that he had this omnipotence.
Give omnipotence to me.
I stood. How could I use this power for the most good? I snapped my fingers, placing a cloaking shield around myself. That was easy! I thought. I then transported with a Q-flash to the site where my Father, Commander Data and the other members of the away team were working. They could not see me. Although it was the first time I'd tapped into it, this ability felt natural to me.
We were in the midst of a deep cavern. Carrying tricorders, the away team members were intent on their analysis of the area. Father walked centimeters past me and I held my breath. I wished I could reach out and hug him, not hide from him. I had not seen him in days!
The away team gathered to discuss their findings. While I listened to their conversation, I didn't completely understand everything that was said. They were attempting to find out why the people of this world were suffering from a depletion of resources. Did that mean the natives were in danger of extinction? If I snapped my fingers and wished more resources on this world, would Father return home? I raised my hand ready to snap into action, but something inside me held me back from carrying out this action. Q would choose that solution. That didn't necessarily make it the right one. Should I take the glory away from Father and Commander Data? Perhaps they were nearing a solution of their own, one that didn't require the power of the Q.
Growing increasingly tired, I leaned against the rock wall and began to fall asleep. Maybe a better solution would come to me in a dream. I didn't take long before slipping into a deep sleep.
I was sitting in my room, missing the mirror I had given back to Tammy and then something occurred to me. Could it have been magical if I had wanted it to be? Something else more magical was happening, I mused, glancing at my hands and trying to remember. What? I brushed the thought aside and turned back to what I had intended to do: Getting dressed for the party. It was my sixth birthday! I reached for my yellow dress, hanging outside the bathroom door.
A strong knock came at my door and I turned to face it. I wondered why Mommy wouldn't let me lock the door and turn the chime on. Curious who it was, I answered, "Come in."
Father walked in. He was nervous about something. "Shannara. It was very... Honorable... Of you to return that mirror and invite that child to the party..."
I sat down on the bed and offered him a seat. He sat down uncomfortably, his posture rigid as usual. Oddly, I had a sensation of missing him when he was right here beside me. Wasn't he?
"I'm glad you think so." I tried to sound older, remembering that I was now calling him 'Father'.
He looked up and out the viewwindow. "Shannara... Do you recognize that star and what it signifies?" He pointed at the brightest star as we lazily drifted past it.
"No, Father."
"That is the Star of Kahless. When Kahless's final breath faded, his soul took its honored place among the stars. It serves as a guide and protector to all Klingons."
Hearing the word 'Klingon' made me uncomfortable. I was not a Klingon, nor a Betazoid. I was not human either. What was I?
"Kahless is always watching over us. He leads the good to honor and glory. He shines brighter when a great victory has been won."
"Are we about to win a great victory, Father?"
Father's face suddenly faded and my room along with him as I found myself back inside the cavern and remembering my dilemma. "Father, answer me!" I begged, though he'd been only a dream. He'd answered that question once on my real birthday. I struggled to remember his reply.
"You wanted your Daddy to come home," Q said, popping precariously on the ledge beside me. . .Although, nothing was precarious for a Q.
Coming fully awake, I looked around the cavern, frightened when I didn't see the away team. "What have you done with them?"
"What have I done with them?" Q retorted in an offended tone. "They have merely retired to the city. They are sleeping in their beds-something your Mommy told you to do."
"I was sleeping until you startled me."
"On a hard rock when you could be in a warm bed back on the Enterprise. Why can't you trust; Daddy will be home soon."
I ignored Q's last remark. "My Father has to come home before my Mother stops loving him."
"Why remain a placid observer then? You have the ability to end this planet's suffering and bring Daddy Dearest home."
"So do you."
"How true, but if I snap my fingers, it wouldn't prove anything to you. Daddy would return to your cozy little family and all would be boringly blissful among the Rozhenkos. You, however, would learn nothing from this experience."
"I don't want to violate the Prime Directive."
"Prime Directive!" Q sneered. "You mortals are so concerned with non-interference that you're never accomplishing anything. Ignore the Prime Directive if it will make you happy."
I crossed my arms and looked at Q smugly. "If we're such a failure, then why are you so interested in us?"
"The potential is there-at least in some species."
"Father said you don't like him, that you are rude and insulting toward him."
"The feeling is mutual, I assure you."
"Why do you keep pretending to care about me? I learned most of my values from my father and I'm not ashamed that he is my father."
"Oh really? Then why are you constantly wishing you were not half Klingon?"
"Because of the way the world looks at me," I admitted.
I waited for Q to counter with some smart remark. Instead, he flashed out. A second later, I found myself lying in my bed and wearing my nightgown.
Tossing the covers off of me, I climbed out of bed. How would I get Father back? Could I still snap my fingers and have my way? Or was Q so angry that he had eliminated my power of the Q? Why had I even tried to play his game? Getting smart with a smart aleck always backfired. I stifled a whine. I couldn't let Mother know I was awake. But I was so worried, and I felt so guilty! Should I have listened to Q?
Suddenly my worries were interrupted by a deep grumble coming from the living area. I recognized that voice! I rushed out of my room, momentarily forgetting that I was supposed to be sleeping.
"Daddy!" I exclaimed as I rushed into his arms.
"It is good to see you, too," he said as he swooped me up into his arms.
"Did you finish your away mission?"
My parents exchanged a look of confusion.
"You did help the people on that planet, didn't you?"
"Yes, of course," Father replied slowly. I sensed uncertainty in him. Had Q sent him back home without helping those people? Or had I worked my magic? Having Father back so soon wasn't right if it meant placing millions of people in danger.
"Are you sure? Do you know that they will be okay? Did you win a great victory?" Suddenly, I remembered what he'd said to me that morning of my birthday: 'If you let Kahless guide you, you will know many great victories.'
"We did," he said.
Mother stepped forward and ran her hand gently through my hair, outwardly comforting me when her own fears burned inside her. Her lip trembled as she spoke. "Sunshine, what do you know about your Father's return?"
I didn't want to tell them that I had beamed down to the planet or that Q had paid me another visit. But did I have a choice?
"I think Q brought Father back home."
Father's grip loosened around me, and I clutched his shoulders fearful that he would drop me. "That menace," Father grumbled.
"We knew he would return, Worf," Mother said, leaning into him. She was trying to soothe him as she had me, but I sensed the rage building inside Father. He set me down and stepped away. Afraid, Mother followed in his footsteps, remaining a meter behind him.
"Q!" Father bellowed. "I demand that you show your face immediately!"
Clutching at the hem of my shirt, I prepared for a battle. What would Q do to Father if he chose not to back down? I knew Father. He believed in fighting to the death. And I was beginning to know Q. He enjoyed humiliating my Father and ridiculing him in front of others.
Silently, I wished for Q not to appear. I mentally hurled my desire across the galaxy, touching whenever and wherever Q happened to be. Holding my breath, I counted to ten. Finally at the end, sure he was not coming, I let out a deep breath of relief.
"Worf?" Mother questioned with worry.
He turned toward her, his expression softening a bit. "Put Shannara to bed. I must speak with the captain about this." Without another word, he left our quarters.
"And as for you, young lady," Mother said, "it's way past your bedtime. I'll tell Data to wait an extra hour tomorrow before picking you up for your schooling."
I smiled broadly, so pleased at the idea of resuming my lessons with Data. One extra hour was not much more to wait.
Minutes later as I was lying in bed, Q once again startled me awake. "You should be happy. Daddy's home. The tin man can pump your brain with a few more megabytes of worthless information. What more could you ask for?"
I turned toward Q who was sitting on the edge of my bed, hand on chin. He had heard Father calling him. Had he chosen not to answer because I had willed him not to, or had he simply ignored Father? Q thought life was a game. He didn't care if people died during the playing. It mattered only whether it had a happy ending for him.
"Why did you bring my father back to the Enterprise? I thought you said I wouldn't learn anything unless I brought him back."
"I changed my mind," he said enigmatically. "You were taking too long."
"Changed the rules, you mean. I don't want to play this game anymore."
"You will in time." Q flashed out.
"No, I won't," I promised more to myself than to Q.
Slowly, I drifted to sleep.
