I had an idea… in my opinion it is a fucking glorious idea but we'll see… Basically, this is pure humor and nothing else… I hope you laugh as much as I did! XD
Disclaimer: I don't own the things I reference in this fic, I am the OC after all so I own him, but not RWBY or anything else I blatantly reference with this… thing…
I have no idea what I'm doing with my life… again…
The two teams, RWBY and JNPR, and AJ were all sitting in a train and Ozpin was dressed as the Conductor. Actually screw it, imagine him and everyone else is dressed as they always are! It's way funnier that way!
"Now would all of you please take your seats we are in a moving vehicle after all." Ozpin requested and they all sat down on the various seats on the sides leaving a middle isle through the train car. "Thank you." He said when everyone sat down.
He grabbed the mic nearby to speak into the intercom. "Your attention please. Are any Polar Express passengers, in need of, refreshment?" He asked and they all cheered in agreement. "I thought so."
He opened the door to the next car and a bunch of Ooblecks came out. They all spun every other seat around so now the seats would face each other like at a diner. They were all tap dancing as they moved. They whipped out a cloth and set it between the seats and the cloth floated on its own like it was over a table. (Ya that's right I fucking went there…)
watch?v=4VQGWVH695U if you need a visual there you go. I don't own the video either.
"Hot! Hot!" The Ooblecks all said.
"Ooh! We got it!" Ozpin sang into the mic.
"Hot! Hot!"
Men dressed like chefs jumped out of the same door and a steaming golden machine came out with them as they did some spectacular flips and cartwheels. The Ooblecks had moved between seats to make room for them.
"Hey! We got it!"
"Hot! Hot!"
"Say! We got it!"
The Ooblecks moved back into the isle continuing to move in sync.
"Hot Chocolate! Hot Hot!"
More chefs came out and one balanced a tower of cups the other threw out plates and they somehow all landed in the hand of an Oobleck.
"Oh! We got it!"
"Hot! Hot!"
"So! We got it!"
The chef with the tower of cups began throwing around the cups and they all landed on a plate three per plate.
"Hot! Hot!"
"Yo! We got it!"
The Ooblecks all extended one leg far out to the side lowering their bodies before standing up straight again not losing grip of the plates or losing a cup.
"Hot Chocolate!"
"Here we only got one rule!" Ozpin said. "Never, ever, let it cool! Keep it cooking in the pot! Ya got-"
"Hot Chocolate!" The Ooblecks finished.
Chefs came in with the golden machine again and it shot out hot chocolate across the room and perfectly landed in the cups. The Ooblecks passed a cup to each person seated.
AJ noticed Pyrrha hid her drink behind her on her seat between her and Nora.
"Hot! Hot!"
"Ooh! We got it!"
"Hot! Hot!"
"Hey! We got it!"
"Hot! Hot!"
"Say!... We, got it!"
"Hot Chocolate! Hot! Hot!"
"OH! We got it!"
"Hot! Hot!"
"So!... We got it!"
One more cup was expertly handed to and Oobleck which handed it to Pyrrha. Pyrrha took that cup and hid it under her seat while retrieving the other cup on her seat.
"Hot! Hot!"
"Yo… We got it…"
"Hot Chocolate!"
"Here we only got one rule!" Ozpin said.
"Here we only got one rule!" The Ooblecks chanted.
"Never! Ever! Let it cool!" Ozpin sang into the mic.
"Never, ever, let it cool!" The Ooblecks chanted while them and the chefs rode on the machine all holding cups before the machine rolled away and the Ooblecks jumped off and stood on the armrests of all the seats.
"Keep it cooking in the pot!" They chanted as they stood precariously with no loss of balance.
"Soon you got some Choc-o-late!" Ozpin sang as he dramatically slid down the whole isle.
The Ooblecks all did a spin before they landed.
"Hot! Hot!" Ozpin said now as he moonwalked back.
"Heeeey! We got it!" The Ooblecks chanted now.
"Hot! Hot!"
"Oooh! We got it!" The Ooblecks chanted as they ran up the walls and back flipped, still holding the cups and used they to refil everyones cup when they landed. No spills were made.
"Hot! Hot!" Opzin said in a matter-of-fact tone.
"Yeaaa! We got it!"
"Hot! Hot!" Ozpin said quickly.
"Oooh! We got it!" The Ooblecks chanted. The chefs came in on that machine again and the copies all jumped onto the floating tables to get out of the way, forcing everyone to grab their cups and hold them out of the way.
"Ha!... Ha!..." Ozpin breathed into the mic.
"Yeaaa! We got it!"
*Wheeze! Wheeze!*
"Ooooh! We got it!" The copies said while dancing on the tables.
"HOT! HOT!" Ozpin said dramatically, like it was the big finale.
"Yeaaa! We got it!" They chanted with the same tone as ever. They picked up the table coverings that they stood on and pulled them off as they jumped off revealing there was no table.
They landed with one leg extended before standing up straight and wrapping the cloth around them like it was part of the attire the entire time.
The chefs came by and flipped off their seats all the way to the other side of the train car while the Ooblecks turned to seats around so they were all facing forward again and they all excited the car including Ozpin. The music suddenly stopped. Only two Ooblecks remained, they looked at the students, smiled, and one of the Ooblecks revealed themselves to be Neo who had used illusions to create the others They both bowed dramatically before leaving as well.
"You know!? Montezuma, the king of the Aztecs, would bring 50 quarts of hot chocolate every day!" Jaune said out loud even though no one was listening to him.
Pyrrha pulled out her extra cup and proceeded to go to the other car and give it to the boy in green that was alone in the back.
Yep, Polar Express, I just fucking went there! Listening to that while trying to type down what happened… had to be the most fun I've ever had writing anything on this site! If you get a good visual of Ozpin and multiple Ooblecks singing with so much emotion like that, it is SO out of character and it is fucking hilarious in my opinion!
Hope you got a kick out of that random idea I had, I'll do more like that if you suggest them! Don't forget to follow and or favorite, and review! Have a great week!
