"Umm… fair warning, Emma."

She looked up from her lunch and her seat at the table to watch Ruby Lucas stride into the lounge room, her eyes a bit wide.

"Mr. Laraby is…" She stopped to cough back a laugh. "Full on this afternoon."

Ah, one of Emma's favorite octogenarians!

"I swear if he grabs at my butt just one more time…" Ruby's smile grew. "So just watch out for him." Her trek across the room lead her straight to the refrigerator.

Emma only gave a light shrug as she watched her friend. "I will keep that in mind. But he seems to have a real thing for the dark-haired dark-eyed ladies. Which puts me pretty much in the clear."

"Well, lucky you," Ruby teased. "God, I don't know if I'll ever get used to it." With her lunch bag dangling from her fingers, she made her way back to the table.

"Mr. Laraby is a sweet guy," Emma reminded her.

"When he isn't being creepy grabby guy," Ruby corrected

If Ruby sounded as if she was a bit fed up with her job, Emma knew that it wasn't true. She had been with this facility even longer than Emma had. And she also knew that having the attention of their patients wasn't the worst thing about this job by far.

"Well it's lunch time, and I'm going to enjoy it," Ruby said as she went through her back. She looked up suddenly. "Speaking of, I was wondering if you guys wanted to get together. I mean, it's been a minute." She smiled. "We could do dinner."

"Like a double date?" Emma asked skeptically.

It conjured up thoughts of her last night out with a couple. It had not gone all that well. Watching Killian warm up to Ariel as they sat across from her and Neal. The jealousy that coursed through her during the entire night…

What didn't help was the fact that Killian was now avoiding her at all cost. It had been more than a week since she had seen him last. More than a week since that day at the gym.

The way that they had left it had been with him completely on board with acting as if that night at the bar had never happened. But it wasn't as simple as that. Not when she saw something more than just regret and guilt in his eyes.

The kiss had come back to her. It wasn't just her. He had kissed her back. And it had been lust-filled and passionate. And…

She wanted more. Kissing him had only deepened her need.

"We could corner our men, Emma," Ruby told her with a conspiratory smile, pulling Emma from her thoughts.

She raised an eyebrow at Ruby's statement.

"Meaning?"

"Meaning… I've been waiting on Victor to pop the question for months now," she confided to her friend. She shook her head as she opened her bag. "And still nothing. Three years, Emma? If he doesn't go down on one knee soon, then it's going to be Armageddon."

It made Emma laugh. "Who knew you had the wedding bug so bad?" She arched an eyebrow in skepticism. "But what does that have to do with me and Neal?"

"Maybe you guys have hinted around at the idea of marriage yourself?" Ruby asked lightly. "Or maybe you have had the idea? The point is, I need the sound of wedding bells to be ringing in the air. And I need Victor to hear them."

Hm, marriage. It had never been at the forefront of her mind. And now…

"I don't think Neal and I would be a winning example of a couple on the horizon of marriage," she murmured softly.

Ruby looked pointedly at her. "Two years and nothing?"

When she loved another man?

Emma shook her head. "Don't look for that invitation any time soon. Or ever."

It seemed to surprise her friend. "But…"

"Maybe I'm just not the marrying type."

Ruby's smile was easy. "I find that to be hard to believe." Her gazed narrowed on hers. "So… seriously… you guys have never even considered marriage before?"

Emma's phone began to vibrate from inside of her pocket.

"No," she answered simply. Pulling out the phone and seeing Neal on the screen only forced a sigh from her mouth. "And now that you've spoken him up, would you like to have confirmation?"

Ruby shook her head. "No thanks. Who knows? His answer might just surprise you."

"Oh, please." Her eyes fluttered closed briefly at the thought of Neal asking her… to marry him.

"Oh please what?"

His voice was thick and deep and so familiar. She remembered how, at one point, she had loved to hear it right there in her ear. It sent a bit of an ache to her heart to not feel that way anymore. She attributed it to many things. Some of which she knew she was supposed to put behind her.

Emma shook her head to herself. "Nothing. Hello, Neal. What is it?"

"I'm glad I caught you while you're on lunch break," Neal told her. "I wanted to let you know that Killian had to cancel on us tonight."

That one sentence had almost depleted her. She wasn't surprised by the fact. She had even expected as much. So she really only wondered what excuse he would have given to Neal.

"Why? Why did he cancel this time?"

"His whole schedule has been changed around," Neal explained. "Apparently he has some extra work that is keeping him busy."

"Did you see him?" She wondered if she had asked too quickly. No, she didn't…

"Not today. I only talked to him over the phone."

Hm. Killian was still talking to Neal, but had completely ignored her since the last day she'd seen him. How was that acting as if nothing had happened? It was surprising that Neal hadn't noticed himself. But she guessed it was better that way.

"Well if his schedule has changed, then there's nothing else to say."

She didn't like the way Ruby glared at her. Her gaze had left lunch so that she could watch Emma.

"I'll see you when you get home tonight," Emma murmured into the phone.

"I may be late," Neal said warily. "I may be able to stay over an extra hour or so. But I will see you tonight, Emma."

"That's fine. I'll see you at home."

Ending the call, Emma moved to put the phone back into her pocket.

She didn't know how long things were going to go like this. She understood Killian's need for space to get used to what had happened, but it had already been a week. It only made her wonder where his head was at. He hadn't been upfront about how he felt about her that last day. So what did that all mean?

"Who cancelled on you?"

Ruby's question brought her attention back to her.

"Killian."

Her eyes brightened instantly at the name. "Oh, it's been far too long since I've seen him."

"At least it feels that way," Emma murmured softly. And she didn't like it.

"Is he still single as ever?" Ruby smiled coyly. "Because maybe going the jealousy route with Victor would work. And it would be fun, too."

"He's… dating." If she had to categorize it as that. Not because she wanted to.

"And taking all his free time away from you?" Ruby shrugged. "I only ask because you don't look too happy about it. I know you guys are really close."

They had been really close. Had she messed up everything by sharing her drunken confession?

Based on this past week, it seemed to be the case.

But no. There was a part of Emma that couldn't be sorry about Killian knowing the truth. There was a part of her that knew telling him was the right thing to do.

"What is it, Emma?" Ruby asked her. "Your mind just went somewhere."

Emma shrugged. "I was just thinking of how things have changed."

"Well I can't picture him straying too far for too long. He always seems to drift right back to you guys."

Emma was unsure by that. "What does that supposed to mean?"

Ruby shook her head. "Killian hasn't been serious with a girl since I've known him. He seems content with how things are- don't ask me why. He's Neal's best friend, but he also picks up the slack for him as well. When Neal isn't around to take you out or just hang out, it is always Killian who steps in. Always. I don't know if it's intentional on Neal's part- or even Killian's. But he's like the fill-in boyfriend." Ruby paused to give another coy smile. "A fill-in boyfriend without the perks. But he always seemed good with it. If he left you high and dry for his own full-time girlfriend, then I'll be completely blown away."

Emma could only stare across the table at her friend as Ruby casually went back to her lunch.

"I never thought about it that way," she said softly. But she could see how Ruby had.

Killian was a big part of her life. He had been soon after she had met him. She leaned on him for friendship and so much more. Over time, it had been so easy to count on him when Neal had failed where time was concerned. He filled that role greatly. Over time, it was a debate on who she had wanted to be with on those certain occasions. And, more times than it should have been, it was Killian who she wanted.

"And… there you go again."

Emma's gaze fell back to Ruby. She saw the question written across her face.

"I never thought about it that way."

Ruby shrugged at her. "Do you think he's going to get serious with some random girl?"

A random girl?

"No, I don't think so."

Not some random girl. Because…

She wanted it to be her.

Emma wanted to… wrap her hands around his neck and strangle him! Literally strangle him! She got it. She truly understood why he was ignoring her, but that didn't stop it from driving her crazy.

Killian's phone went straight to voicemail. She shook her head as she decided to text him instead.

She knew that he was at home. She had seen his car in his parking space in the lot. So it was the simple fact that he was avoiding her.

It was her conversation with Ruby that had made her need to confront their situation again. Killian was a part of her life. She wasn't ready to give up on him. It had been more than a week. Time apart and avoidance was not going to fix their issue. She had come clean about her feelings for him. She had not had the chance to go in-depth about them because… Well for many reasons.

Emma had gotten the sense that maybe there had been something there for him as well. Why else would he have reacted the way he had? Why would he need to put so much space between them?

She had never believed it to be possible before. But now? Now it was the only thing on her mind.

Her knock on his door had had a sense of urgency to it. If he ignored her now…

If he acted as if she meant nothing to him…

The door swung open with the smallest of creeks. On the other side of that threshold stood the man who she had not set eyes on in a very long time.

For just a moment, they stood there eyeing each other. If he had known it was her, would he have opened the door? The way he nibbled at his bottom lip made her think otherwise.

"Emma." The mutter of her name left his mouth quietly.

She looked past him and over his shoulder.

"Are you going to invite me in?" she asked lightly.

Emma saw the indecisiveness all over his face. There was a brief shake of his head before he stepped aside.

"What… what are you… doing here, Emma?"

She stepped inside the apartment slowly. Her heart- she could feel it- was beating strongly in her chest. She turned around so that she could face him.

Killian had closed the door behind him and had leaned against it. His eyes were travelling across every inch of her. But it was with a wariness.

"You've been avoiding me," Emma reminded him. "I just called you. No answer. I texted you. Still no answer."

His smile was small, and it didn't reach his eyes.

"You know the deal, Emma."

Her head tilted to the side. "That you can't handle this?"

He closed his eyes and shook his head. "That's… not fair, Emma."

He wasn't even looking at her. He had closed his eyes. He had let her into his home, but it had been with reservation. It had been a drunken confession, but it had been nothing but true. And yet, the way he reacted to her made her feel as if she had been right all along.

This part did hurt. It hurt to think that her heart could not give its all to Neal because a part of it was solely Killian's. But it didn't matter to him. He would rather ignore her than face the truth. He would rather close his eyes instead of accepting it.

"Is this us now, Killian?" And it was broken. Her heart ached as she looked at him.

He opened one eye- just one- so that he could see her.

"You don't-"

"Because I know you talk to Neal," she cut in. "I know you still see Neal- even though your schedule has all but totally switched around. Which means you've stopped coming over to the apartment and you make plans to hang out, but eventually cancel."

His other eye opened then.

"What do you expect me to do, Emma?" His voice was raspy, deep. It was full of emotion.

"You said that you wanted to act as if this never happened," she reminded him. "I told you that I loved you. And your response to that was to act as if it never happened. All for the sake of Neal."

"All for the sake of Neal," Killian muttered, his eyes closing for just a brief moment. He pushed himself off of the door. "I need a drink."

"Isn't that how this all started?" Emma asked, watching him make his way towards her.

He stopped in his tracks immediately. His gaze, which had been trained on his destination out of the entranceway, rested on hers.

"You're right." His hand swiped over his mouth and he slowly shook his head again. "Goddammit, Emma. What are you doing here?"

It was full of frustration. It was full of despair. The way he looked at her. It was as if there was a need to consume her.

"It's been more than a week," she answered firmly. Her stance was just as strong as her words as she stared back at him. "And I refuse to let you continue to ignore me the way you have been."

His chin tilted upwards slowly, his gaze never leaving hers.

"What do you suggest then, Emma?" He shrugged tightly, his fingers curling into fists at his side. "I'm… trying my damnedest here, Emma, to do the right thing."

Her eyes widened as she watched him. "What is the right thing?"

He moved then, his eyes wild as he stood right in front of her.

The energy was electric, bouncing off of him and onto her. She felt it as it ran all throughout her body.

"The right thing to do is to forget what happened, Emma," he cried out to her. "The right thing to do is to forget that you said it. How… how can you… not see that, Emma?"

He was close. There was a nervous tension washing off of him in waves. But it was also Killian. Standing right in front of him, she didn't mind that he was wild with disbelief. It was still Killian. It was still the man who she had secretly loved for so long.

"Why is that the right thing?"

His scent was invading her, making her need to have more of him all the stronger.

His hand dragged over his face. "Are you serious?" He turned his back on her, his murmurs kept to himself.

"You wish I would have never said anything."

"It would have been a hell of a lot simpler if you hadn't."

"Killian." Her hand closed over his arm and she waited for him to swing back around to face her. "I didn't do this consciously, Killian. I didn't set out to tell you how I felt about you so that I could hurt Neal- or you. It was all the factors that lead up to it. The fact that I look at you and see a handsome, good-hearted, incredible man who is my friend. A man that I am not only extremely attracted to, but who makes my heart beat out of my chest because he simply smiled at me. It was the fact that there was never a day that you looked at me as anything other than a friend. And not even the beautiful and attractive friend. You ignored the fact that I am all woman."

"Is that-"

"It's the fact that you presented that woman to me as if I was supposed to be happy that you chose her! It's the fact that all this was in my mind when I was alone with you and drunk! I was sad. You made me sad that you never even noticed me!"

"I never noticed you?" His blue eyes were piercing into her eyes. His hands came to outline her face, almost touching but refusing to do so. "I never noticed you, Emma? Is that what you honestly believe?"

It made her swallow. It made her question her thoughts.

He was closer now. So very close. But he could be closer still…

"You wanted to challenge that fact?" she whispered up at him.

"Damn right, I do!" And he did move closer, his body finally making contact with her.

Emma felt the tingle run through her body at that touch.

"I saw you, Emma." Those eyes were burning on her now. Truth was a powerful fuel energizing him in that moment. "I saw you every damned day. Since the day Neal brought you home, I knew how lucky he was to have met you. You're beautiful, smart, and vivacious. You have a tongue on you that refuses to take crap about anything. You tease me. You taunt me. You push me."

She felt his fingers as they pushed through her hair and took a firm hold to a handful of it right then.

"If I let you, you'd drive me crazy," he continued as his eyes roamed over her. "Unfortunately, since the moment you told me that you love me, that is exactly what you have been doing."

It was everything that she wanted to hear and everything she thought she would never hear. Emma's hands ran across his waist until she held on just there, tugging him all the closer.

"Do you mean that?" She was in awe. She saw the heat in his eyes. She could feel it radiating off of him.

"I mean it, Emma." It tore out of him as if the words were actually causing him pain.

"Kiss-"

She had barely opened her mouth before his was falling down over her.

The instant feel of his tongue invading her mouth made her knees grow weak. That hand tightened in her hair and he angled her mouth just perfectly for him to kiss.

It had taken Emma by surprise. She felt the shudders pulsating through her body as he slowed down the wild kiss. Her arms encircled his neck, bringing him all the closer to her.

Maybe it had been fear that had drove him at first, making him messy and eager. She had liked the way he had commanded control over her. But she liked this, too.

Killian's lips opened slowly over hers, coaxing her with a bit of his tongue to come out and do the same. And she loved it. She had happily accepted his invitation.

His arm came to grip her by the waist tightly, pulling her even closer. She could feel him. She could feel all of him.

God, he was kissing her! And she was kissing him back!

"Killian." She wanted more…

He pulled back, and she heard the groan.

Emma pulled him back to her, finding his lips with hers again in a soft peck.

It didn't last. He pulled back away from him.

"What?" she whispered. "What?" Don't.

He was slow to shake his head. For a moment, his gaze was trapped on the ceiling before looking back at her.

"Neal." Another painful realization. "We shouldn't-"

"No, no!" Emma pulled at his arm, bringing his close again. "Please don't bring up Neal."

"This is wrong!" The torment was all too clear.

"Don't think about Neal." He was going to shut down on her again. "Put me first. Think about me. Touch me. Kiss me."

"Emma."

She let him slide out of her arms.

"You love him. You're with him."

"Not the way that I love you. If I knew- if you would have opened your mouth, you idiot- then I wouldn't have been with Neal."

Killian watched her in surprise. His lips turned up in a smile.

"So it's my fault, huh?"

Emma moved then, grateful for just a moment of levity.

"It's all your fault," she whispered. Her eyes closed at the feel of his arms wrapping around her. "I love you, Killian."

She could feel the brush of his lips against the top of her head.

"Heaven help us," he muttered. "Neal… doesn't deserve this."

Emma wanted to hear him say it back to her. She wanted to know that this was more than just a questionable judgment call on both of their parts. She wanted it to mean something.

"Well maybe we do."

Killian pressed a kiss on the top of her head.

"You see why I stayed away, Emma? Do you understand? That once you said it, you opened a box that I couldn't close? How am I supposed to stay away from you now?"

She looked up at him. "You don't."

And it really was a hell of a situation. But it was the one she wanted to be in if it was the only road to her happiness. With him.