Thanks for all the great reviews! I live for reviews now so keep them coming :). Yes I do update this one quickly but when I have lots of reviews for a story and lots of thoughts running in my mind for it I just want to keep on writing it though I will update my other O.C stories soon!
Chapter 7
Ryan came into the living room wearing a suite. After promising Summer that he'd be there she went back home to 'get dressed' too. Though he knew the real reason was she didn't want the awkwardness of seeing Seth's parents again. He stood uncomfortably in the living room. It was so weird being in there after being cooped up in the pool house for more then a week. Sandy came from his study, he had just called Hailey.
"Ryan!" He said flashing a huge smile. "Now here's a pleasent surprise. I thought you weren't coming."
"I uh well I changed my mind." Ryan said uncertainly and Sandy's smile got bigger.
"Enough said." He said happily. "At least I'm not going to be the only one going in this family." He sighed to himself. Ryan looked confused and then understood.
"Kirsten's not going?"
"I don't know." Sandy sighed again and shook his head. "I don't know anything. I called Hailey and she's on her way over here. Hopefully she can convince Kirsten but the way things are going I can bet she wont come to the wake. It's to painful for her. I'm not sure if I can handle it but someone from this family has to go right?" Ryan nodded.
"I'm sorry I haven't been around this past few days." He said slowly thinking of what Summer had told him. "I know that's pretty selfish of me and..."
"Who said anything about you being selfish?" Sandy asked confused.
"Uh, no one." lied Ryan. "I just feel um...with all you two have done for me and when you two need me I hide away in my room and..." Sandy shook his head.
"Say no more Ryan. I don't blame you for whats happening. No one does." Ryan looked at the staires.
"Maybe I should see Kirsten before we leave." He suggested. "I haven't seen her at all since graduation night." Sandy shrugged.
"If you want to." He said. "If that'll make you feel better." Ryan looked at the staires again.
"Is it true that she started drinking again..." He started to say and then stopped realizing that he wasn't supposed to know about it." Sandy looked at him.
"How did you know about that?"
"Summer was here just now." Ryan finally admitted. "She came from the back I guess. But yeah she was here and...informed me of what was happening outside the pool house."
"Oh I bet she did more then inform you." Smiled Sandy. "I don't care what she said if it got you to come. Unless of course she blames you for the accident..."
"She doesn't." Ryan intervened quickly.
"Good, cause I would have a problem with that." Sandy nodded. "Because it wasn't your fault Ryan. You know that right?" Ryan said nothing. He was thinking of how he should apoligize to Marissa but he didn't know how. Deep down he knew it wasn't Marissa's fault. If it was anyones fault it was Vulchuck's. It was just easier blaming Marissa then it was himself. He looked upstaires.
"I think I will see her." He said, not answering Sandy's question. Sandy looked at him sadly and nodded.
"I'll be waiting down here. Tell her I can always call Hailey on her cell if she changes her mind about coming." Ryan nodded and went upstaires. It was always easier to focus on someone elses problemes rather then his own. He headed upstaires and knocked on the door.
"Go away Sandy! I told you I can't go!" Came Kirsten's angry voice.
"It's not Sandy, it's me. Ryan."
"Ryan?"
"Can I come in?" Silence. Then he heard the door unlocking.
"All right." Kirsten said. He walked in slowly and saw the same thing Jimmy saw. Bottles of vodka and chardney, and pills. And kleenix around the room. The tv was on mute but again it was yet another home movie.
"You and I have been living pretty similar to each other haven't we?" He asked sadly. She looked up from the unmade bed that she was sitting in, tears in her eyes.
"Yeah I guess so." She said wiping them away. Ryan went over and sat next to her.
"Sandy's worried about you. Everyone is." Kirsten nodded.
"I know, Jimmy told me." Ryan nodded. He knew from what Marissa told him that Jimmy was there. Sandy had also told him through the french doors. Lately there was a lot of converstations like that. Sandy talking through the doors of the pool house. Reaching out to Ryan. Sometimes Ryan answered, sometimes he didn't.
"Are you going" Kirsten asked Ryan. Ryan nodded.
"I have to. And you know you have to." He told her. "You'll hate yourself later if you don't." Kirsten nodded slowly.
"I've been meaning to ask you Ryan..."
"What?" Kirsten had tears in her eyes again.
"Was he in any pain or scared when he...passed away?" She chocked on those words. "You were there when he died and..."
"No, he was in to much shock to be in pain. He didn't feel anything. And I was holding him so he was in a comfortable position. Me being there helped him not be scared either" Ryan told her even though part of that was a lie. Seth was scared-Ryan could see it in his eyes-but there was no reason that Kirsten needed to know that. She nodded. He looked down on the floor, uncomfortable with the whole situation.
"At least he didn't die alone." She said softly. "No one should die alone. " He nodded in agreement and moments passed without them talking.
"Are you going?" Ryan then asked to fill the silence. She looked at him oddly.
"To the funeral." He asked.
"Well I have to speak?" She asked after a few moments of thinking. Ryan shook his head.
"No. No one has to speak unless they want to." He said.
"Are you?"
"I uh...I hadn't planned on saying anything..."
"You should. I'm sorry I don't mean to pressure you into it..." Sighed Kirsten. "I was just thinkning with how close you and Seth were. Like brothers, the closest friend he's ever had...That you'd..."
"I understand. If you want me to, I'll say something." Ryan told her.
"I'm not going to guilt you into saying something Ryan." Kirsten said. "What type of mother would I be?" Ryan looked surprised at the mother comment.
"You still consider me a son to you?" He asked.
"Yes of course, why wouldn't I?"
"Well I don't know. With all that's happened. You might not feel ready for 'motherhood'. That sort of thing. You might not want to be a parent anymore anyways. " Kirsten smiled at him.
"We adopted you. You are part of our family. Seth's death doesn't change that fact. Nor does you being 18." Ryan smiled softly, sighed and looked at her.
"I'll make a deal with you." He said suddenly. She looked at him.
"You go to the wake and I'll make a speech about Seth." Ryan told her. She stared at him.
"I'll be doing both of us a favor. Both of us need to do it." She sighed and nodded slowly.
"All right... I'll go."
SCENE SWITCHES TO A CHURCH WHERE CROWDS OF PEOPLE WERE WALKING INTO IT. SANDY HAD A HUGE SMILE WHEN HE SAW HIS WIFE COME OUT OF THE ROOM FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE THE NIGHT AT THE HOSPITAL. HE CALLED HAILEY ON HER CELL AND SHE DROVE QUICKLY BACK TO THE PLACE GLAD THAT KIRSTEN WAS FINALLY COMING TO GRIPS WITH THINGS. SANDY PUT HIS ARMS AROUND KIRSTEN WHO WAS WEARING SUNGLASSES TO HIDE THE BAGS UNDER HER EYES. RYAN WALKED NEXT TO HER, ALL THREE OF THEM IN BLACK. KIRSTEN HAD A BLACK VIEL OVER HER FACE. ALL THREE OF THEM LOOKED VERY SOLEMN.
Julie in the front row of the church saw Kirsten and Sandy and hurried over there.
"Sandy, Kirsten so glad you both decided to come." She said and hugged both of them much to Sandy's surprise. She also hugged Ryan who was looking at Marissa who had followed her mother. Marissa greeted a every solemn Kirsten and said hello to Sandy. She looked at Ryan unsure of what to do. Ryan looked back, equeally uncomfortable.
"Uh, Marissa., Can I see you for a moment?" He asked. She looked surprised.
"Sure." She said and followed him. Julie led Kiresten to the front seat with help from Sandy. Summer saw them from a distance. She was sitting with Taylor who was actually pretty quite and serious for a change. Luke walked in the church and came over to her.
"Hey Sum." He said and Summer jumped. "Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you." He said. She looked up, shocked.
"Luke!" She cried and hugged him. "I can't believe you came!"
"Are you kidding? I just can't believe all this is happening. It's so surreal." Luke said and she nodded saddly.
"Tell me about it." She sighed and then she looked over his shoulder and saw Anna walking in.
"Oh My God, Anna." She said softly. Luke turned, confused.
"Who's Anna?" He asked.
"Uh Seth's old girfriend?"
"Wait, Seth dated you AND her?" He said as he saw who Anna was.
"Yeah why?"
"She's hot! And so are you. I guess Seth was just a late bloomer." Luke shrugged. Summer ignored that comment and hurried over to Anna.
"Anna, I'm so glad you came." She said. Anna smiled at her. It was clear that she was still in a bit of a shock.
"I can't believe that this is happening." Anna said tearfully.
"No one can." Summer told her. Being strong for others was a good way of getting rid of her own greif which was too much to bare at the moment. Anna nodded.
"Is it going to be an open coffin?" She said softly and Summer nodded causing Anna to put her hand to her mouth. She looked over and saw the Cohens with Julie and Neil.
"I should say my respects to them." She said.
"So should I." Luke said.
"And me too." Zach's voice said behind them.
"Oh my God, Zach." Summer hugged him. "I can't believe you're all here."
"Of course I'd come. Seth and I were good friends when we weren't fighting over you." Zach smiled and so did Summer. "Those were good times." Sighed Zach.
"Oh I hope you don't mind Sum..." He started to say. She looked confused.
"Mind what?"
"I brought my girlfriend with me." He nodded to the benches in the back where a blond was sitting. She was looking around as if not sure on what to do.
"She wanted to go because she knew Seth and I were close. Well sort of close. Her names Bethany." Summer smiled.
"Of course not. I don't mind at all. I think Seth would like a crowed funeral."
"Then he'd definetly love this one." Sighed Zach. "Well I mean he should it's his, well I mean he shouldn't. You know what I mean." He said and she smiled.
"Well I guess we should say our repsects to Seth's parents. Zach told Luke and Anna."
"Am I included in that?" Said a voice and there was Alex walking up to them wearing a black tee shirt and jeans like always.
"Is everyone from Newport here?" Said Summer.
"Seems like it." Anna said.
"And yes you are included." Zach smiled at Alex who didn't smile back.
"I can't believe he's gone." Alex said. "Even though he was not a 'bad kid' no matter how hard he tried to be I always had a soft spot for him. Even though he was as weak as a girl." She laughed thinking of how he tried to lift boxes. They all smiled at that. "He was incrediblly sweet." She looked at Summer. "He really cared for you." She said softly. "In case you didn't know that I thought I'd tell you."
"Thank you." Summer said softly and then looked at the floor awkwardly.
"Eh um." Caughed Zach. "Let's go and pay our respects now that everyones here." With that everyone but Summer went to Kirsten and Sandy. She would talk to them later without anyone around.
"Mr. and Mrs. Cohen?" Said Zach coming up. Sandy and Kirsten both looked up, startled at the crowd that had formed. "I was an old friend of Seth's. We started the comic book together."
"Oh yes, the comic book guy. I remember you now." Said Sandy. Kirsten just smiled politely.
"Well I just came to say my respects. I am truly sorry for your loss. Seth was a wonderful guy who didn't diserve this fate."
"I agree." Luke said which surprised both Sandy and Kirsten.
"Me too." Anna smiled.
"Seth did diserve better." Alex agreed. Sandy and Kirsten were both shocked of how many people were Seth's friends.
"I guess he had more friends then we realized." Sandy smiled. Kirsten liked that too. They both disliked the fact of how unpopular Seth was.
AFTER A FEW MORE MOMENTS OF TALKING SCENE SWITCHES TO RYAN AND MARISSA TALKING.
"What did you want to tell me?" Marissa asked, uncertain of what to say or do. Ryan looked at her.
"It wasn't your fault." He told her. "I shouldn't have agreed with you. We can all play the blame game. I was driving, you pissed off Volchuck, Sandy and Kirsten let him go out with me, my mom bought me a truck. The point is the only one at fault is Volchuck. He may have been pissed off but he didn't have to follow through on his urges. Not one of us helped him do that. Heather might have but we didn't. It wasn't you're fault Marissa."
"But." Marissa started to say tearfully.
"It wasn't your fault." Ryan repeated. Marissa stared at him.
"Maybe you should try telling yourself that." Marissa said softly and he looked surprised.
"While I know you are being sincere deep down you still think it's your fault. You are never going to move on if you think it's your fault. I told you it was my fault to shift the blame, so you'd stop blaming yourself. I mean I still think I am partly repsonsible for this but still. I know you Ryan. You'll say one thing but think another. It's time to let go of that blame. If I let go of it you have to to. And I'll be here for you Ryan. However long it takes I'll stick by you. I don't care if it takes a hundred years." Ryan just stared at her, not sure what to say. "But thank you for apoligizing, that does mean a great deal to me." Marissa added softly and walked out purposly leaving Ryan alone in his thoughts.
SCENE GOES BACK TO THE FUNERAL WHERE THE SERVICE HAS BEGUN. A JEWISH PRIEST GIVES A PRAYER IN HEBREW AND STARTS TALKING-QUOTING PASSAGES FROM THE BIBBLE. THE COFFINE IS BEHIND HIM, EVERYONE WELL LOOK AT SETH AFTER THE SERVICE. SANDY LOOKS AROUND AND SEES THAT EVERYONE IS UPSET AND EVEN SOME OF THE YOUNG MEN WERE TEARY EYED, EVEN LUKE-AND ALL THE GIRLS WERE CRYING EXCEPT SUMMER. SANDY LOOKS AT HER FOR A FEW MOMENTS AND THEN LOOKS AT HIS WIFE WHO WAS SOBBING QUIETLY. JULIE HAD HER ARM AROUND KIRSTEN AND LOOKED UPSET ALSO. SANDY REALIZES THAT SETH'S DEATH AFFECTED MORE PEOPLE THEN HE AND KIRSTEN EVER THOUGH IT WOULD. THAT FOR SOME REASON COMFORTED HIM. THEN THE PRIETS ASKS IF ANYONE WOULD WANT TO SAY A FEW WORDS ABOUT SETH NOW IS THE TIME TO DO IT. NO ONE SAYS ANYTHING AT THE MOMENT THEN THEY HEAR RYAN'S VOICE FROM THE SIDES. MARISSA HAD RETURNS AND SAT WITH SUMMER.
"I would like to say a few words." Ryan said from the side rooms where he came from with Marissa. He looked at Kirsten who smiled at him for keeping his promise. He walked slowly up the staires of the platform unsure of what to say. He stood behind the podium and stared at the faces staring back at him.
"I uh...I really don't have anything written out.This was more of a promise to Seth's mom to get her to come..." That got smiles from everyone even Kirsten. " I guess I should start from the begining. I met Seth when I was staying at his house. His father took me in when I had no where to go. For all of you who knows Sandy Cohen you probably aren't surprised that he did that..." That got laughs out of everyone.
"Well uh... Seth was different then the rest of the kids up here. Basically he wasn't a snob." More laughs. "And he was a bit weird and geekish but that was what made him unique to me. He also was the only one who didn't seem to give a damn if I was from Chino or not. I could have been from Australia for all he cared." More laughs, Sandy was smiling. Ryan was a great public speaker surpisingly. " I think part of that reason was that he was lonely. He wanted companionship. He needed companionship and I needed-on the verge of sounding clitche-a friend. I always felt protective of him from the very begining. We just clicked, an instant connection I guess you could say. And we had been best friends more like brothers actually ever sense. And we hardly ever got into fights though he could be very annoying at times...very annoying." More laughs. "But that's just who he was. He was a bit self absorbed mainly because no one gave a damn about him for so long that he was the only one that cared about himself. In fact I bet he'd be shocked that he had a full house at his funeral. I know I am." Chuckles floated across the room, "Seth was the type of person that you could count on. While he had a great sarcastic wit about him there was also a serious side that was there. That you knew you could count on him for anything. He'd be with you and stick by you even when the goings got rough. He was one of the few people in the very begining, when I first moved here, that I could automatically trust right away. And I had a hard time trusting people for a while. But for him it was easy. He had that aura about him." Ryan cleared his throat and took a drink of water. His face saddened. "What happened wasn't fair to him. He didn't diserve that. And yes to confirm any rumors I was there when he died. He died in my arms." Murmurs now floated around the room. "I won't forget the last words he said to me." Added Ryan. He then looked at Summer. "He said. Ryan...and then Summer." Summer looked up sharply, tears had been forming in her eyes for a while now but she couldn't believe that Seth's last word was her name. That was too much. Marissa looked at her.
"Are you all right?" She asked softly. Summer shook her head and quickly scooted out of her seat thankfully at the edge of the seat on the far right hand where she could leave through one of the doors without anyone noticing her leave. Marissa looked at her leaving and so did Ryna but neither one said anything. Marissa thought about leaving and going to her but wanted to be there for Ryan too so she stayed to hear the end of Ryan's speech.
Ryan felt awful. That comment wasn't supposed to upset her. It was supposed to make her feel better. But he had to go on. No one even noticed Summer left.
"Now has most of you know Summer was Seth's girlfriend and they dated for almost 3 years." He said trying to move on with is speech. "They were great together. I never seen a guy care more about a girl then Seth did with Summer." He sighed. "I don't know what point I'm trying to make or if I'm making any. Right now I just feel like I'm rambling. Maybe I not. I don't know. What I do know is that I never had a friend or brother like Seth Cohen and I never well. I blamed myself for his death and then later on for a short period I blamed my girlfriend. Long story...The point for the blaming is that we can all sit around and blame one another. But that's not going to bring him back. That's not going to change what happened. And that won't stop our griefing. And if any of you truly know Seth you know he wouldn't want you to mope around forever. He'd want you to move on with your life. Get a life as he'd say." More laughter. "And that's what I'm going to try and do. It's not going to be easy for me at all, it'll be hell actually but I'm going to try and do it even if I don't succeed, for his sake. And I suggest that if you are in horrible pain with his death you'd try the same thing because we all know that's what he would want." He looked at Sandy and Kirsten when he said that. "Thank you." He finished quitly and left the poduim and left a very silent and stunned audience.
(Since this is such a long chapter I'll finish the wake and service in chapter 8! And remember the more reviews I get the faster I'll update! I put Zach's girlfriend in there to show everyone that he wont be dating Summer. Oh and I have ideas of how this story will end now and I even have an idea for a second part. If you want I can share my ideas in the next chapter and see if you'll like them or not. )
