Disclaimer: I do not own any of the bands or songs in this chapter.
Chapter 13
Polka is the best medicine
We practiced for the rest of the weekend. We did all the greats: AC/DC, Guns and Roses, Dire Stratts, and of course "Weird AL" Yankovic. And there were some times where there were some solos. Like when we did "Dare to Be Stupid" by Weird AL, Sam really got a chance to shine. The entire song was drums and keyboards. Things were going great… until Monday.
It started out like any other day at Casper High, except, I couldn't find Sam anywhere. Tucker was there helping me look for her. But with no prevail. Finally at lunch, we found her. But she looked angry… er than usual. Tucker and I decided that she needed to sit alone today. An angry Sam is a Sam you DON'T want to meet. Trust me on this. I KNOW what I'm talkin' about.
So, it was just me and Tucker eating the week-old sloppy Joes. But Tucker didn't care. He'd eat meat even if it were rolled around a filthy monkey's cage ten-dozen times. I gave him mine because I wasn't that hungry. I was still thinking about Sam. I never seen her this angry before. I wanted to know what was wrong, and what I could do about it. I mean, a FRIEND has to help a FRIEND. I got an idea. I got out my cell phone and decided to text message her. Thank you technology, I thought to myself.
Ghostboy14: what's up?
Gothgurl14: nothing. I don't wanna talk about it.
Ghostboy14: anything to do with me or tuck?
Gothgurl14: No, of course not. Bye.
(Gothgurl14 has signed off)
So, nothing to do with us, eh? Well, telling us or not, Sam needed some cheering up. And I was just the boyFREIND to do it. But how? Hmmmm… "That's it!" I said quietly.
"Uh… I'll be right back Tuck."
"Where are you going?" he asked.
"To cheer up Sam. But first, I need some help from the band geeks."
"Why?"
"You'll see" I said slyly.
I walked over to the band geeks table. The band geeks here used to be the band geeks from middle school. Plus in 7th grade, I was in the band, so I knew them well.
"Hey guys" I said cheerfully.
"(Snort) Hey Danny" said Fred, the stuffed nose leader of the band.
"Hey, can you guys do me a HUGE favor?"
"Sure," said Fred, "what do you need?"
"Well, you see that girl over there, the one wearing the plaid skirt and the army boots?"
"(Snort) Yeah, why?"
"Well, she's in a really bad mood right now. So to cheer her up, I was thinkin' if you guys could…"
I whispered the rest in his ear. "Oh gee, I don't know Danny…" said Fred. "How's 12 bucks sound?"
I placed a wad of money in his hand. "Like music to my ears." said Fred.
"So, can you?" I asked.
"(Snort) you have piqued my interests, and I agree."
"Excellent…" I said in my best Mr. Burns impersonation.
About 5 minutes later, the lights in the lunchroom went dark. Everyone looked around, trying to see what was wrong. Suddenly a spotlight opened up over… ME. I tapped the microphone I held in my hand to test it. It was working. The tap could be heard all around the cafeteria. It was time to put my plan into action.
"Hey, can everybody here me?" I took the awkward silence as a "yes".
"Great! Can I turn everyone's attention to Samantha Manson over there?"
Another spotlight shone, this time on Sam. Sam, Tuck, and basically everyone in the cafeteria gave me the ever famous "what-the-hell-is-he-doing?!" look. Some kids almost SAID it. "She's having a hard time today, so I'd like to dedicate this song to her. Enjoy." I pointed to the band and yelled, "HIT IT!"
ANGRY WHITE BOY POLKA
Medley Arranged by Al Yankovic
LAST RESORT (Papa Roach)
Cut my life into pieces
This is my last resort, suffocation, no breathing
Don't give a... if I cut my arm bleeding
This is my last resort
'Cause I'm losing my sight, losing my mind
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine
Losing my sight, losing my mind
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine
Nothing's alright, nothing is fine
I'm running and a-crying
CHOP SUEY! (System Of A Down)
Wake up! (Wake up)
Grab a brush and put a little make-up
Hide the scars to fade away the shakeup
(Hide the scars to fade away the shakeup)
Why'd you leave the keys upon the table?
Here you go create another fable
You wanted to
Grab a brush and put a little makeup
You wanted to
Hide the scars to fade away the shakeup
You wanted to
Why'd you leave the keys upon the table?
You wanted to
I don't think you trust
In my self-righteous suicide
I cry when angels deserve to die, die, die
D-d-die die die die die
Hey!
I quickly threw the mike to Tucker, who had already caught on to the song.
GET FREE (The Vines)
I'm gonna get free
I'm gonna get free
I'm gonna get free
Ride into the sun
She never loved me
She never loved me
She never loved me
Why should anyone?
(Come here, come here, come here)
I'll take your photo for ya
(Come here, come here, come here)
Drive you around the corner
(Come here, come here, come here)
You know you really oughta
(Come here, come here, come here)
Move out to California
HATE TO SAY I TOLD YOU SO (The Hives)
Do what I want 'cause I can, if I don't because I wanna
Be ignored by the stiff and the bored because I'm gonna
Hate to say I told you so, alright
Do believe I told you so
Now it's all out and you knew
'Cause I wanted to
Tuck threw the remote back to me. I realized that Sam was looking cheered up already.
FELL IN LOVE WITH A GIRL (The White Stripes)
Fell in love with a girl
I fell in love at once and almost completely
She's in love with the world
But sometimes these feelings can be so misleading
Can't think of anything to do
Yeah, my left brain knows that all love is fleeting
She's just looking for something new
Yeah, I said it once before but it bears repeating, now
LAST NITE (The Strokes
Last night
She said
"Oh baby, don't you feel so down
When you turn me off
When I feel left out"
So I (what'd you do?)
Well, I turned around (right around)
"Oh, baby, gonna be alright"
It was a great big lie (big old lie)
'Cause I left that night
Yeah
Me and Tuck shared the mike on the next part, as if to say, "Come on up Sam!"
DOWN WITH THE SICKNESS (Disturbed)
Ooh ah ah ah ah!
Ooh ah ah ah ah!
Get up
Come on get down with the sickness
Get up
Come on get down with the sickness
Get up
Come on get down with the sickness
Open up your hate, and let it flow into me
Get up
Come on get down with the sickness
You mother get up
Come on get down with the sickness
Get up!
Come on get down with the sickness
Madness is the gift that has been given to me
RENEGADES OF FUNK (Rage Against The Machine)
We're the renegades of funk, we're the renegades of funk
We're the renegades of funk, we're the renegades of funk
Sam finally got up and started singing the next verse.
MY WAY (Limp Bizkit)
This time I'm a let it all come out
This time I'm a stand up and shout
I'm a do things my way
It's my way
My way or the highway
This time I'm a let it all come out
This time I'm a stand up and shout
I'm a do things my way
It's my way
...or the highway
OUTSIDE (Staind)
But I'm on the outside
I'm looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
'Cause inside you're ugly
Ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you
Back to Tuck.
BAWITDABA (Kid Rock)
Bawitdaba da bang da dang diggy diggy
Diggy said the boogie said up jump the boogie
Bawitdaba da bang da dang diggy diggy
Diggy said the boogie said up jump the boogie
Back to Sam.
YOUTH OF THE NATION (P.O.D.)
We are, we are
The youth of the nation
We are, we are
The youth of the nation
We are, we are
The youth of the nation
We are the youth of the nation!
Hey!
To me.
THE REAL SLIM SHADY (Eminem)
I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up
I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please, please
Please stand up
All three together now.
Slim Shady won't you please stand up?
(Stand up Shady)(Stand up)
(Stand up Shady)(Stand up)
(Stand up Shady)
Shady won't you please stand up?
Hey!
As the song ended, the entire cafeteria started cheering. Until, one kid screamed,
"Everybody down! Lancer's coming!"
Everybody quickly sat down and got back to eating. Within seconds, Mr. Lancer entered the room.
"Hmmm… I thought I heard the accordion playing somewhere."
He left, and Sam came over to the table. "Danny, that was great!" She did the thing I'd least expected her to do. She hugged me. Then, after 5 seconds, she realized what she was doing and took her arms off me. Our faces were blushed a tomato-y red. "Sorry." she said. "That's alright." I said. "You didn't do so bad yourself." "Thanks." she said blushing again. "But let's just stick to rock instead of polkas" she finished. "I'm with that." Tucker said.
"So what were you so mad about this morning?" I asked Sam on the way home from school. "Well, Dash was acting like a jerk again." she said. "He's like that everyday," I said, "and you never get that steamed about it." "Yeah," she said, "but you should've seen what he did." "What'd he do?" asked Tucker. "He put up posters all over the right wing of the school saying that me and Danny were boyfriend and girlfriend." "Jeez," I said, "will that guy just get off our backs? Just because we're friends, doesn't mean that we're a couple!" I paused for a moment, with a confused look in my eyes. "Hey, wait a minute." I said. "What were you doing in the right wing anyway, Sam?" "I was looking for a smoke machine in the AV room and in the janitor's closet." she said. "Part of having a rock band is Special Effects, and we need them if we wanna win." DING! A light bulb went off on top of my head. "And I know just a place to get them." "Get what, Danny?" asked Sam. "Special Effects." I said. "Follow me. I know a place where we can get everything we need."
Jeez! This was a long chapter! Where is this place Danny is taking them? Could that friendly hug turn into something more later on? Why again am I asking YOU all these questions? Stay tuned to find out!
-PhantomAL
