May: I'm updating this story! Lolz.
Shuukaku's fetish is my own fetish, I love the same kind of guys as him…-sweatdrop-
Previously:
Madara jumped when a blonde-haired man scrambled in, followed quickly by a silver-haired masked man.
The blonde, who Madara recognized as Kyuubi's father looked over at him and smile sheepishly "Ah, yeah. I'm hiding from my wife." He explained. The gray-haired man, the costume designer for Romeo and Juliet, chuckled.
"And I'm running away from that cute teacher cause he got mad when I grabbed his ass." Minato turned and smacked Kakashi upside the head.
"Kakashi!" he scolded, waving a finger at his ex-student.
"What!? Did you see that tight thing! He has to be a virg-" Kakashi was cut off by another smack to the head, only much more violent and delivered by one pissed Iruka.
"Y-y-yo-you….." Iruka growled, voice trembling in rage as he hovered of Kakashi menacingly.
Minato sweatdropped, attempting to escape silently, only to bump into Kushina who scowled.
"Mina-kun?" she snapped.
"Ah, yes sweetie, who I love with every ounce of my being and have two lovely children with?" Minato replied, cringing.
"Why do you find you old student's antics so amusing when they including harassing our Naru-chan's teacher?!" Kushina's voice grew steadily in volume until she was screaming and shaking a dazed Minato by the collar.
Madara sweatdropped 'And I thought Mitoko was nuts…' he thought, standing up slowly and dodging the flying bodies and managing to escape from his office unharmed.
He took a deep gulp of non-violent air in, and proceeded to stalk the grounds for his adorable Kyuubi-chan.
Kyuubi shuddered, rubbing his shoulders as he stood on the make-shift balcony prop for the R+J play. He tried to pick up what Itachi was babbling on about underneath him on the stage, that would be including spewing out riddled versions of Old English come-ons.
He sighed, glancing behind him nervously 'Why do I feel like I'm being watched..?'
"Kyuu-chan! Your line, dearest!" Itachi called up.
Kyuubi sweatdropped. "…You're having fun…you're actually having fun…" he stated blankly.
"Oh, sweet love! How my burning flesh desires to plunge deep within you!" 'Romeo' sing-sang up to the beet red 'Juliet'.
"That's not in the script, you perv!" Kyuubi screeched.
"It should be!"
Shuukaku was a born plotter. That was a fact, and a vast majority of the time he did things with his plots, like reek havoc on poor unsuspecting women.
I mean, women were worthless, all the world needed them for was reproduction! As far as Shuukaku was concerned, the only good women out there were gay, or supported being gay, or had wonderful hair. (note: the author is a chick)
Oh yes, long, silky hair that felt so soft to the touch. Hair that could only have been gifted to said women by the gods. And he'd found that hair in one of his own gender.
Kyuubi.
He almost had the red-haired beauty in his grasp too! Before that sleazy Uchiha came along. Not to say that the Uchiha's hair wasn't completely gorgeous, but Kyuubi had more of it.
Shuukaku sat in his room, on his bed with his back against his wall, contemplating.
"Oh, how to capture that beauty without the beast noticing?" he wondered aloud. He glanced over to his room door when it opened. "Ah? Gaara? What ever would my babiest brother want?" he asked, sitting up. Gaara scowled at him before walking over and standing in front of Shuukaku's bed.
They stared at each other for a while, at least until Gaara swallowed enough of his pride.
"I need your help…" Gaara muttered, Shuukaku lifted a brow. Gaara didn't need help with anything, after all, he was the most skilled in the family at making others 'disappear'.
"Help?"
"With this…person…" Gaara mumbled. Shuukaku could've sworn he was blushing.
"…For real? Is this a hit?" Shuukaku sweatdropped "Gaara, that's why we had to move to Kono-"
"It's not a hit, I want to bed this one, alright?!" Gaara snapped out, before realizing what he'd just said.
Shuukaku stared at Gaara in shock, before pulling the startled redhead into his arms.
"Shuu-"
"Oh, Gaara! I always knew you looked down the same path as your aniki! Come now!" Shuukaku released Gaara and grinned at the bewildered look the boy gave him. "So…what kind of hair does he have?!" Shuukaku asked excitedly.
Gaara, after calming down, smirked. "Two words nii-san." He replied.
"Bowl…"
Shuukaku's eyes widened fearfully. Oh, no…
"…cut."
Temari and Kankuro sat on their couch squealing over the 'Boys Gone Wild' channel.
"YOU FUCKING RETARD WHO WANTS TO FUCK A RETARD!!" Shuukaku's voice boomed. Both Temari and Kankuro jumped, staring in shock as Gaara sprinted out of Shuukaku's room seconds before Shuukaku himself, the blonde was waving around scissors. Temari and Kankuro ran for cover while Gaara snatched his hoody from the couch and ran to the hallway, snatching up his shoes and slamming open the door into Shuukaku's face, before deftly slipping out of the gap between the door and bolting down the street.
Shuukaku cursed, rubbing his swelling cheek, glaring after Gaara's rapidly retreating form. Damn Cross-country runners.
"And don't even thinking about coming back until you've found yourself a decent looking whore!" Shuukaku shouted, waving his scissors in the hair.
Temari and Kankuro took the opportunity to run up into their rooms.
Gaara wasn't going to be home for a while.
"Kyah!" Kyuubi squealed, pushing Itachi's face away for the eight time, scooting back on the slab meant for the final Tomb scene in Romeo and Juliet.
Itachi frowned, rubbing his abused cheek. "Kyuu-chan, I know you're embarrassed by this, but my kissing you is necessary for the play!" Kyuubi had vehemently refused to 'rehearse' the previous scenes that included Romeo and Juliet snogging, but at the final scene Itachi had icily stated they were to completely play out the scene (he was still upset that Kyuubi had smacked him for suggesting they practice their 'one and only night together' act to the fullest.)
Kyuubi blushed, biting his lip nervously. "I know…" he stated softly, looking away from Itachi's black face. The Uchiha currently having an inner struggle.
"…Fine. I apologize ahead of time." Itachi stated curtly, grabbing a startled Kyuubi be the shoulders and kissing him roughly.
"Mmm! MMPH!" Kyuubi tried to voice how completely wrong this was, despite the fact that Itachi's tongue was doing wonderful things to his mouth. Itachi pulled back slowly, grinning at the dazed look Kyuubi gave him.
"Now was that so bad?" he asked, Kyuubi stared at him numbly before the words took effect. Kyuubi abruptly smacked a startled Itachi across the face and ran of the stage crying.
Itachi stared after him in shock, before chasing after him.
"Koi!? Kyuu-chan! Kyuubi! Dammit, stop running!"
"Leave me along you sick bastard!" Kyuubi wailed, running into the costume closet, slamming the door shut after him and locking the door. Almost immediately he heard a series of bangs on the other side of the door.
"Kyuubi, let me in! I'm sorry, okay? Kyuu! Kyuubi?!" Itachi frantically listened for some sound from the other side of the door.
Kyuubi ignored the Uchiha, walking deeper into the room, racks upon racks of costumes and accessories filling the room. He sat down on a comfortable pile of clothes, covering his ears, trying to drown out Itachi's shouts. Everything was Itachi's fault, everything.
If Itachi didn't insist on him being Juliet.
If Itachi didn't try to molest Kyuubi every single second of every goddamn day.
If Itachi hadn't met him.
Kyuubi buried his face into his hands.
He was so exhausted...he didn't know he'd fallen unconscious as his body dropped down onto the pile of fabric beneath him.
Naruto nervously sat in the Principal's Office between and glowering Sasuke and grinning Sai.
Naruto's daddy, Minato glared at both of them, before sighing and looking at Naruto. "Naru-chan, tell daddy what happened…" he asked softly.
Naruto opened his mouth to respond but Sasuke, once again, cut him off.
"I told you!" Sasuke snapped, standing up and pointing a shaking finger at Sai, who smiled blankly. "That bastard molested your son! My property!" he didn't release his mistake until Minato slammed his hands down onto his desk, rising up.
"Sasuke-kun, as your Principal, I ask you don't curse in this facility. As the father of your "property" I'm telling you to get the fuck out of this room and wait in the hallway with the 'molesting bastard' over there before I toss your bodies into a jet plane engine." All this was said in a quiet, yet freaky as shit tone that made Sasuke and Sai run out of there faster than Speedy Gonzales, and that was one fast rat.
Naruto stared after them in shock, mainly at Sasuke's action. Didn't the bastard say he loved him?! Who leaves their love with a psychopath?! He gulped, turning to look at father who was swallowing some aspirin.
"…Okay, Naru. Seriously, tell me…" Minato sat down, smiling at his son tiredly. Naruto sighed.
"Sai touched me between me legs and Sasuke and him fought, then Iruka-sensei was about to join in but them Sai made fun of my…thing, and I sorta beat the living crap outta him." Minato sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose.
"Naru, as your principal, I'll remind you that there are other ways to solve issues like these. As your daddy, I congratulate you and am inviting you to join Kyuubi and myself on taking out that perverted bastard." Naruto sweatdropped.
"Kyuu-nii knows?" he asked warily, listening for gunshots in the hallway.
"He's gonna know…" Minato grinned creepily.
Both the blondes glanced up as Shinzune, the assistant school nurse burst into the room.
"Minato-san! Kyuubi-kun passed out!" Minato stood at attention immediately.
"Where?!" he snapped. Shinzune flinched at the cold tone in the usually warm-hearted man's voice.
"He's in Tsunade-sama's office, she says it's nothing hospital worthy…" she added quickly as Minato thundered past her, Naruto running behind him.
Itachi glanced up when Minato slammed his way into the nurse's office. In a flash Minato had Itachi's collar in his fist and his face in the Uchiha's startled one.
"You. Stalker. Spill. Now." Minato ordered icily. Itachi paled slightly, balancing on the tips of his toes.
"Kyuubi got all emotional and locked himself in the costume closet and passed out, Tsunade-sensei says it's because of fatigue." He replied. Minato released him walking over to the bed where Kyuubi was sleeping peacefully on his side. He stroked the red hair the boy got from his beautiful mother and sighed in relief.
"Let him nap here…and you." Minato turned to Itachi, who flinched. "You're coming with me to explain with Kyuubi's been so tired…" he stated ominously. Naruto trotted past them, sitting down next to Kyuubi and studying his brother's sleeping face. Sasuke wandered over next to him, placing a hand on Naruto's shoulder.
"Hey…wanna stay here?" the brunette asked. Naruto nodded quietly. Sasuke sighed. "Fine, I'll give you the class notes later, okay?"
"'Kay…" Naruto replied softly, pulling Kyuubi's blanket up over his shoulder. Sasuke glanced at the blonde's blank face before turning to leave.
May: lolz, no. Kyuubi's not dying, contracted a rare disease or anything of the sort. He's just sleepy. I swear, after a day at school I literally collapsed onto my bed and slept for 6 hours straight, did the same thing the next day. We all need a little naptime, folks.
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