I'd not needed surgery to fix my arm. The doctor told me that it could have been significantly worse based on my cancer's progression. For now, it was casted. I was told to return in X amount of time, but I knew that I would be leaving the rest up to Owen. I just hoped he was alright too.
Jack came and got me and told me where Owen's room was.
"Is it bad?" I asked.
"He'll be fine," he said, filling a coffee from the coffee maker. We had stopped on our way to his room. I watched him take a sip and sneer. His long life made him particular about how he liked things. His coffee was no exception.
I filled a cup as well. Between the time in the waiting room, wait time once I was taken to a room, and my actual time with the A&E doctor, it was nearly 2:00 in the morning. I caught a glimpse of myself in my reflection in the window. I'd taken off everything except my undershirt and trousers, as the rest had been covered in dirt and Owen's blood. My face looked grave and tired. My casted arm reminded me of when I was younger. My father had broken my arm on a playground when I was young.
We walked in silence the rest of the way to Owen's room. The halls were filled with the soft hum of machines and the light beeping of monitors. I felt my stomach knot up outside his door. It was my fault entirely. I'd seen the blood quickly begin to pour from his face. We quietly entered his room, not sure whether we'd find him awake or asleep.
"All I'm saying, Tosh, is that the worst part of being in hospital is not having any pants. I want my bloody pants." He was quite awake, sitting up in the bed, donning a white hospital gown. His face was turned toward Tosh, so I couldn't see anything, but there was certainly no blood on the sterility that was his gown and sheets. He was hooked by a hand to a poled bag of fluids.
"And bloody is what they are, so just relax," Tosh responded in jest.
Owen had yet to notice us, so Jack tapped lightly on the wall. "May we come in?"
Owen finally turned to face us. I took in the sight of his injury for the first time after seeing it happen. He had four long freshly sutured cuts across his face. Each was likely about three and a half inches in length, and one had just barely missed his eye. The stitches were clean, but there was light bruising around each line. I knew they would scar, as the cuts had looked deep to start. I began to apologize to him, but he shrugged it off, claiming that I was not at fault. It helped me to feel a bit more at ease, but not much of the guilt was gone.
"How's the arm?" He asked.
"A bit immobile at the moment."
"They give you anything for the pain?"
"All they ever give me is for the pain, but the stuff you give me is usually the only one to actually make a difference."
"Yeh, well, Hippocratic Oath, right?" He gave me a short smile before turning his attention. "Jack, want to do me a favor and get me out of here? They're keeping me on surveillance for rabies."
"I'll see what I can do," Jack said, turning to walk out.
Owen got up to use the restroom, leaving Tosh and I alone. I sat in a chair to the right of the bed.
"Not our best Weevil hunt, hm?" I said. She laughed a short, breathy laugh; the kind you give someone when you want them to feel appreciated even though the joke was not funny to you.
"How are you doing, Ianto?" She asked, pulling the attention on me.
"You should be asking the man with the sutures," I responded.
"I'm not, though. I'm asking you. I just want to make sure you're holding on alright." She paused, choosing her words carefully, but not overly carefully. "You should be spending these moments doing all the things you love; all the things that make you happy."
"Yeah," I responded quietly. A moment of silence passed and I wondered if she regretted saying what she had said. "Jack says he's going to take me on holiday somewhere."
"Yeah?" She asked. She smiled at me, attempting to be suggestive.
"Yeah," I responded.
"And how do you feel about that idea?"
I was playing with the hem of my shirt mindlessly. "I don't know," I started. "It would be nice, I've just never went away before."
"I think it would be nice for you. You two can have some time aloneā¦" I gave her 10,000 points for effort. She was always filled with effort and well intentions, and while I wouldn't necessarily say that her and my relationship ever reached the status of friendship, she was quite possibly the least intimidating to talk to in my life. Everyone has their judgements and their opinions and their remedies, but Tosh is like me. She feels broken, alone, and knows she did a hell of a lot wrong in her life.
"Is it ever truly possible to "get away" from Torchwood?" I asked, quietly as though I did not want to upset the steady rhythm of the beeps from the machines in the room.
"Maybe not," she said, smiling again. "But you could sure try."
Owen returned and laid back down on his bed, separating us. He reached for the TV remote.
"Thanks, Tosh." I finished, starting to get up to go find Jack.
"Ianto, you're going to let me take a look at that arm when we get back to the hub, yeah?" Owen called.
"Of course, you're the doctor."
Moments later, after a series of Torchwood access codes, a call to UNIT, and a little bit of time, Jack returned with the news that Owen was released. A nurse came in to check on him one more time and to advise him that it was not a good idea, but Owen's cockiness drove him straight out to the SUV.
Upon arrival at the hub, I allowed Owen to take me down to the med bay in order to examine me. He talked about t for longer than I listened before recasting it and telling me to ice it. Despite the how thorough he seemed to me, he would have been undoubtedly more thorough had he not been in a great deal of pain himself. I watched him take a multitude of pain killers before packing up his things to go home.
The hub fell silent in a matter of moments. Owen, Tosh, and Gwen, all were returning to their respective flats. I suddenly craved the morose comfort that came with my own flat. With a Torchwood salary and not much to do, I had spent much of my money between decorating and funds for my niece and nephew. I decided to go home, rather than spend another night at the hub with Jack.
I walked to Jack's office, being lulled by the soft hum from some machine in the centre of the hub. I quietly knocked on the door with the back of my knuckles while I stood in the door way. He was at his desk, already filing some medical cost transfers for UNIT after the night's events. The room was tidier than I remembered having left it.
"Hey," I said.
"Hey," he responded, straightening up in his seat.
"I'm going to head home, alright? I'm kind of incredibly tired." Tired was an understatement. My knees felt weak and my chest felt heavy. I felt like I could collapse at any point and prayed that it would be on my bed.
"Okay," he responded. "Are you feeling alright?"
I approached his desk and leaned against it. "Based of tonight's events, I think I just need some rest."
"Okay, well why don't you come in late tomorrow?"
"Okay," I responded. I leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Goodnight, Jack." I stood up and started to walk.
"Goodnight, Ianto," he responded.
I walked to the door before turning again. "By the way, it's a yes," I called back at him. "On the time away."
I turned again and walked out the door. I drove home in silence before nearly stumbling into my flat. I fell onto my bed, narrowly avoiding hitting my arm as I went. I slept instantly.
