The change in the relationship balance between the three of you was still new and tenuous, and Saeran could tell all of you were still creeping along and trying to find boundaries. But to be more accurate, Saeran wasn't doing anything at all. It was only you and Saeyoung who were trying to find the boundary lines. Saeran was an extra in the relationship. Frankly he didn't really know what he wanted, so he was fine with seeing what ideas you came up with to test the limits. After all if one doesn't know what they want, how do they know what to test for?

Still Saeran found it all very strange. He didn't . . . mind the new touches. He had always avoided your hands before, but that was before this strange want had built up inside of him. The sight of Saeyoung laying in your lap and having your fingers run through his hair made a strange craving appear in Saeran's stomach. His scalp would tingle just imagining you doing the same to him, but he never asked for it. That would be strange. You had never offered either, clearly taking note of Saeran's previous avoidance to your touch, and so Saeran had been stuck at an impasse.

It wasn't like he wanted to be dating you. Honestly the thought of doing some of those disgusting things you did with Saeyoung churned his stomach. But there were other smaller things that Saeran found himself staring at you for. Kisses, in his opinion, didn't seem so bad. Especially those ones he would sometimes catch you and Saeyoung exchanging that seemed soft. The ones that made some strange emotion shoot up Saeran's spine when he saw the soft looks you two shared afterwards. It was unnerving, but even when he looked away he found himself drawn back to the sight.

Saeran hadn't understood the emotion whatsoever. His relaxation around you and the new sudden urges. He wasn't about to bring it up with anyone . . . but still the words had slipped out of him when he had let his guard down around Saeyoung. It was a very old habit from their childhood, confiding in each other. Saeran didn't like to open up as much, but sometimes he couldn't hold back against the tiny urges of his childhood. Slipping through the cracks in the armor his adulthood had required him to form. And he had nearly wanted to hit himself for being so idiotic.

But Saeyoung had only considered him for a long moment before giving him a small understanding smile. That same smile he gave Saeran back in those days. The one that said "I get you, bro. No need to say more". Saeran clung to that knowing that he didn't have to go into details anymore. Somehow Saeyoung understood. What he understood, Saeran didn't know, but Saeyoung understood so it was okay.

"Whatever you do, just don't do anything that would hurt or upset her." Saeyoung had told him. "Otherwise I'll get mad."

But what was he talking about? Saeran didn't even know what he would do to you! That is until you two had been in the kitchen and the sight of the sugar on your lips had been too much. His restraint went lax for just a moment, and he found himself kissing you. It was only then did he realize what that urge had been. He had wanted to kiss you. That's all there really was to it. Kissing seemed . . . nice, he thought. But there was nobody he wanted to really kiss. He didn't trust anybody enough to let them get that close to him.

But you were an exception. You, who was so kind to him despite everything he had done to you. Who smiled and joked with him and understood him when he needed space. He saw how you treated Saeyoung and saw how happy his brother was . . . and knew that you couldn't be a bad person. You, who had even been kind enough to a stranger to return a cell phone to a mysterious location. You were someone he wouldn't mind kissing, if only because he wanted to feel some of that happiness that Saeyoung did when he was with you.

Things were awkward for a bit afterwards. Saeran didn't regret what he did, but he wondered if kissing you had classified in Saeyoung's mind as "hurting or upsetting" you. You hadn't hit him or anything. You had only seemed baffled by the kiss. Which Saeran knew was an appropriate reaction considering even he was somewhat confused by it. But he definitely did not have those types of feelings for you no matter how you tried to clarify. He only wanted some part of that kindness that you gave Saeyoung and sometimes the others in the RFA. He wanted a piece no matter how selfish it was. He just . . . wasn't sure what kind of piece he wanted.

In that sense Saeyoung must have once again figured it out before Saeran could. He somewhat begrudged his brother for understanding the emotions and wants before Saeran, but maybe it was because he just had more experience in the area. Whatever he had said to you, it caused you to start the experimentation. You would now kiss Saeran goodbye as well when you left, whether on the cheek or a peck on the lips, and occasionally you would hold his hand. You were more proactive in your affection for him, almost dragging him down into your lap sometimes to play with his hair. You would hold his hand when you felt like it, and you didn't reject him when he hesitantly initiated contact. Your compassionate smile would make his chest warm until he had to either look away or flee.

Saeyoung encouraged it all with a watchful eye. Saeran was tempted to push his brother's limits with how much he was allowed to get from his pregnant wife, but Saeran didn't even know where to start. Saeyoung was lucky in that sense. In many others Saeran knew he was lucky too, even if that meant he had to get up close and personal with Saeyoung somedays.

Case in point with the newest experiment.

"Pick a side!" Saeyoung sang out around a yawn, wiggling up close to your body and patting the bed. The large single bed had room either on Saeyoung's side or your other side where Saeran could lay down at, but Saeyoung's words made Saeran less willing to choose either side. It was going to be hot and it was going to be crowded. Saeran wasn't sure he wanted to share a bed at all with either of you, but your room choices had left him with no decision.

"What's with that face?" You teased, wrapping an arm under Saeyoung's neck so his head rested half-buried into your neck with that gross smile of his. "Don't you want some of this action?"

"The offer's there~ Or you can sleep on the floor." Saeran watched Saeyoung's hand grab your waist, slipping somewhat under your shirt to touch skin. He was thoroughly wrapped up in you. If Saeran laid down on the bed, either way he would be essentially cuddling with Saeyoung too.

"The floor sounds appealing." Saeran said. The only thing that was keeping him standing was sheer determination. He was jet-lagged and exhausted. He just wasn't used to staying up all the time anymore. And a bed sounded more comfortable to sleep on than Jumin's private plane, even if that had been pretty nice as well.

Your face dropped a little in a familiar worry, clearly wondering if you had made a bad decision. You were so easy to read in situations like this. Despite everything, it made Saeran feel a little guilty. Damn it.

Reluctantly he climbed into the bed on the other side of you. Saeyoung's one eye regarded him curiously as Saeran fumbled with what he wanted to do. Did he want to cuddle up close to you as well, or was your presence near him enough? He wasn't sure. He settled himself down in the bed and turned his back to you. He could feel the heat of your arm near his back. He was tempted to turn over and also press his face into your neck. What would it be like? But the idea was also a bit too much for him as well. He grew a little angry with himself at his conflicting desires.

"Here, here, here!" Saeyoung called softly, and Saeran bristled as Saeyoung's foot hooked over his thigh and dragged it towards you. You giggled a bit as Saeran turned over to glare, only to find himself much closer than he had anticipated. He gazed at the both of you with wide eyes before looking downwards, finding his hand held in yours. You smiled at him while Saeyoung lifted his head just a bit as he purposely stretched his leg out to half-lay on you and Saeran at the same time. Saeran sighed loudly.

"I'm hot." You complained.

"You're hot." Saeyoung sang back.

"He's hot."

"She's hot!"

"I'm hot!" You laughed as you finished whatever song you two were quoting and Saeyoung made the sounds for what Saeran could only guess was the musical part of the song. Idiots, the both of you. "Seriously though, it's hot."

"Hang on." Saeran shifted the covers so that all of your feet were exposed. Saeyoung yelped.

"Cooold!" He whined.

"Oh well." Saeran responded unsympathetically. He was growing relaxed now. It was definitely hotter than he was used to, but it brought back memories. He was reminded of those nights he and Saeyoung would share the same bed. When Saeyoung would tell him stories of evil overlords and heroics of people unknown.

His eyelids lowered and finally he closed his eyes ignoring whatever you and Saeyoung were murmuring to each other. It would be easy for him to imagine you there with them, if only in the quiet of the night when the brothers were safe from their passed-out mother. He wondered what kind of stuff you would say, and if Saeyoung's voice would also have that gentle love in it that it always had whenever you were with him.

His mind drifted picturing also new children. One or two? Maybe more? A child also sharing the bed with you three. He could only imagine what they would look like, but he was positive that he would see Saeyoung's brilliant smile. Maybe even tears. Their bedtime story maybe a watered-down version of the perils the brothers themselves went through? Or would that be too painful? Most likely Saeyoung's new stories would be bombastic tellings of him saving a princess through dark means. Saeran could only muse about his family and found himself wanting to know what his niece or nephew would look like. He wanted to contribute to a happy home for them.