Crown & Anchor
by Nilladriel

Short chapter, but it seemed appropriate to end it where I did. Enjoy.

My first exam is tomorrow. Fanfiction is a helpful distraction.

Chapter Seven: Drown

Naruto woke up in someone's arms. He hadn't done that since college, and Sakura. It was a nice feeling, except that his arm was numb, and the problem there was the lack of feeling, nice or not. He braced an elbow on the bed and inched away, freeing the trapped limb. Damn, but Sasuke was heavy.

Also, still asleep.

Naruto shook out a hand as tingles raced up and down his arm, like ants high on electricity crawling under his skin. It was still dark, which meant he'd caught only an hour or two of sleep at most.

For some people, sleep transformed them into angels, or stole years away from their face. Sasuke... definitely wasn't one of those people. In the dim light, the shadows accentuated his angular features. Without the habitual frown, the slack muscles of his face meant it looked blank. Naruto traced the contours of Sasuke's lips with his eyes and remembered how soft they'd been. Sasuke was probably one of those freaks constantly armed with lip balm.

Yawning, he eased out of bed, shivering when the cool air hit him. He went to the bathroom quickly, barely remembering to wash his hands. Just before he headed back bed, he turned to the mirror and tugged his shirt up, revealing the flat plane of his stomach, newly decorated with the ugly purple-red of bruises. It didn't hurt, but it was colorful enough that it seemed like it should.

Huh. Looked vaguely like Africa, actually, if he tilted his head sideways. That was an idea--he'd have the kids draw a map on his chest for their next project. Hell, that bit on his lower ribs looked enough like Mozambique for the idea to be plausible.

... Okay, or maybe he seriously needed to get back to bed.

He rubbed his cheek tiredly, shuffling back and closing the door behind him. Sasuke had shifted slightly to the left, face tilted down so that Naruto could see his profile. His hair was... really, really messy, and Naruto's fingers twitched.

For once in his life, he got into bed slowly, pulling the covers back up. Sleeping together in a bed with someone, Naruto had learned, usually took a while to get used to, especially since Naruto was the sort of person who slept like he was waging war: blankets and pillows were the prize. But pillows didn't matter when he could use Sasuke's arm as one, and there were miles and miles of blankets and sheets on the huge bed.

And he just... fit, really. Slipped back into the warmth, back into Sasuke's arms, like he'd never left.

It was a half-thought more than anything, comprising more feeling than actual words, but Naruto wondered if, just maybe, this--them, he and Sasuke--could work, even if they'd only met two weeks ago--


When he woke up again, it was still dark, but the sun was beginning to win the battle: Naruto opened his eyes and saw gray-yellow spread across the room like butter. The thought made his stomach complain.

Sasuke was--somewhere. Naruto listened. Talking, judging by his voice. Maybe he was ordering breakfast again?

Feeling hopeful, Naruto stretched. He kicked the covers off, heading towards the door. Yes! Sasuke was on the phone, and he was...

... he was pissed off, actually. Huh. Naruto slipped through the cracked door. He rubbed the back of his neck.

"--I'm sick of your interference!"

That was... yeah, a pissed-off sort of voice. Naruto was curious now. He grinned. What kind of conversation was Sasuke having? And where was he--?

Hunched over on the couch, turned out, shoulders aggressively tense like he was trying not to jump through the phone line and strangle whoever was on the other end. Naruto felt his grin widen. He was going to permanently cramp his muscles like that.

"I know what you're doing, Orochimaru," Sasuke hissed. Naruto opened his mouth to interrupt and demand food--

"He told me people were following him," Sasuke snapped, and Naruto clicked his jaw shut.

... What kind of conversation, huh. It didn't take Naruto much to figure out this wasn't a conversation he was supposed to hear, which was why he took a few steps back into the shadow of the bedroom door and, carefully, listened.

"I--no, goddammit, Orochimaru, stay away from him. What if he gets suspicious?"

A pause. Naruto stared up at the ceiling.

"That's no reason for you to to get him trailed. I--!"

His hands brushed against the fabric of his shirt. Naruto looked down and thought, No, it's not mine, it's Sasuke's.

"You'll get Namikaze's precious son. I told you. Just give me some fucking time."

He was wearing Sasuke's shirt. He'd woken Sasuke up in the middle of the night, slept in the same bed as him. Just two nights ago, he'd brought Sasuke pizza. Naruto closed his eyes. Yeah. He'd done all that, but now he just wanted to lea--

"NO!"

Naruto jumped, whipping his gaze back to Sasuke. He'd stood up. The bastard would probably regret that in a moment, considering his leg. Not, Naruto thought, that I care. His lips curled, baring teeth.

Then Sasuke stilled. He--loosened up, sitting slowly back down, wincing as he did. His shoulders were relaxed. Except that he was still gripping his phone too tight, and even from the door, Naruto could see the white in his fingers, his knuckles. He was surprised the phone was still intact.

"No. No. I won't--" Sasuke started, voice so soft Naruto had to strain to hear. "I won't... I can't just kidnap him. Because... because--not until I get him away from his goddamn friends."

Naruto took a step back. He thought of the bus ticket Sasuke had given him. He felt sick, sicker than he had last night. His hands shook.

He couldn't listen anymore. He slipped back into the bedroom.

The TV stared at him. So did his reflection, distorted and shaded black. Naruto tore his eyes away, walking slowly--zombielike--to the bed. Sasuke's clothes itched, rough against his skin.

His hands were still shaking.

He got back into bed. The blankets were like an anchor--or like armor, maybe, folded metal sheets against the rising sun and the rising nausea. Naruto could still feel the collected warmth from where the two of them had slept. He moved away from it, squeezing his eyes shut.

Thought: I'm an idiot.

Thought: Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

His reached out to grab a pillow, then snapped his hand back when he felt the warmth still residing there. No. No.

Naruto breathed deep, forced air into his lungs. It didn't chase any of the nausea out.

He heard the door open. Naruto froze, listening to Sasuke's limping footsteps. Then they stopped. Naruto counted in his head, reached twenty, forty, sixty seconds. There was no more sound. What was Sasuke--

Lips ghosted against his cheek. "Get up, idiot."

Naruto didn't move. There was a sigh, warm against his ear.

"I know you're awake, you know." Except Sasuke sounded amused, and when Naruto slowly slid his eyes open, he saw a smirk. Sasuke's bangs brushed against his skin. He stared. Enveloped in shock, he didn't react when Sasuke kissed him again, another press of heat against his cheek, and then his forehead. "Damn, you look sleepy. Were you asleep? Did I wake you?"

--Sasuke didn't know. Of course. He didn't know that Naruto had heard--

"Yeah," Naruto said. The word half-caught in his throat.

"Sorry." Sasuke didn't look like he meant it--just lazily amused, a smirk built into the curve of his lips. "I just wanted to tell you that I have to go for a bit. If you want breakfast, just pick up the phone and order. They'll have whatever you ask for; if they don't, they'll go out and get it."

Another kiss, except this time Naruto turned his head slightly, so that their lips met. His heart thudded against his chest. He didn't answer. He thought he might choke on whatever he tried to say.

"You can go back to sleep," Sasuke said. He reached down, tucked the covers securely around Naruto like he was some kid, even retrieved the pillow Naruto had shied away from.

Then--he left, closing the door behind him. Naruto lay still--very, very still. He counted in his head--down from a hundred, like Neji had taught him, and then up again, and then down in twos, threes, fours.

When he was sure Sasuke had left the suite, he sat up and grabbed the pillow that Sasuke had given him. And then--

"FUCK!"

--threw it as hard as he could. He didn't feel any better.

He held his breath, waiting for footsteps and Sasuke's voice. Hoping for it, really, but he only heard the soft exhale of the pillow as it slid down the window and to the floor.

No. Calm down. Breathe.

... Maybe he'd heard wrong.

He had to have heard wrong--

(You'll get Namikaze's precious son, Sasuke had said.)

Naruto pressed his palms against his forehead and took a deep breath. Too many blows. Too many blows in too short a time. His head hurt. His Dad--those two men--and now Sasuke, damn, fuck him--

Calm, he thought. Calm down. Take a deep breath. Think.

Think.

Not about that phone conversation. About--breakfast, and a shower. About getting the fuck out of Sasuke's clothes. About how good it would feel to punch the bastard as soon as he came back--

Yeah. Okay. Good plan. He'd misheard. He must have misheard.


Naruto ordered breakfast. His stomach was never discouraged by drama.

The food came quickly and arrived hot. Naruto mustered up the energy to smile. Room service--a man, this time, uniform pressed flat, shoes shiny like metal--smiled shakily back, and then fled. Maybe there was something on Naruto's face, or something. He stabbed his pancakes vengefully. The stack quivered.

Naruto ate just a bit less than usual, which meant he ate enough for two instead of the usual three.

He'd already changed back into his clothes. He hadn't even bothered showering.

Naruto wasn't good at waiting, but he used to do it all the time. They'd had a swing--more a plank, really, suspended by thick, rough rope. He'd curl his hands around that furry texture, sit on that plank, and just--listen, listen very carefully, for the sound of their car, huffing and wheezing its way back, and then he'd look up and see hair lighter and messier than his, and blue eyes....

He really wasn't good at waiting.

He settled back onto the couch, nursing a glass--water, not alcohol. He sloshed it around. There were no clocks in the room, which made the waiting worse.

The swing hadn't lasted for long. Naruto had broken an arm. He didn't remember how, but after that the swing was gone. Naruto had taken to the garden, except there he'd always fallen asleep. The grass was soft. He'd always woken up in his own bed, all tucked in.

He'd always, always waited, even when it was cold. His gloves were always worn through, soft enough to be useless, so he'd used scarves to wrap his hands, and he'd sit and watch the road where it disappeared into forest.

There was a click, and Naruto returned to the present. The door opened. He wondered what time it was. He made his fingers relax, holding the glass loosely. He took another sip.

He looked up as Sasuke approached. He wasn't wearing a jacket. Sasuke opened his mouth to say something, and then his eyes fell on Naruto's face.

Naruto didn't waste time. He put the glass down; the chink echoed, too loud. "Who's Orochimaru?"

Sasuke sat down. His eyes narrowed. "So you were awake," he said.

Naruto rubbed his thumb against the lip of the glass. "Um, yeah," he said. "So? Who is he?"

"How much did you hear?" Sasuke asked. Naruto recognized the question. He heard it a lot from his students. What do I have to lie about?

"Are you going to tell me?" Naruto returned. There was half a room between them, and the table, and a tray full of empty dishes. The jug distorted half of Sasuke's face, twisting his lips up-down, widening one of his eyes. The other half of his face was tense, slightly strained.

"He was the one who arranged for you to be followed," Sasuke said finally.

"Why the hell would he follow me?" Naruto asked. And then, because he was a fool who gave everybody the benefit of the doubt, he said, "Because of you?"

"Because of me," Sasuke confirmed, only he meant it a different way than Naruto did. "I told him about you."

Naruto's lips were dry. He said, "Why?"

Sasuke didn't look away, even as he said, "Because of your connection to Sarutobi."

"... How the hell does that old man figure into this?"

Sasuke's lips parted. His eyes widened slightly. Naruto watched the way his cheeks jumped as he clenched his teeth. "It doesn't matter."

"Fine." Naruto shrugged. He wasn't about to swing a hammer to get at an answer he didn't really care about. "I thought you said no one knew about me."

"Orochimaru didn't," Sasuke confirmed. "Not until I told him."

"Yeah?" Naruto's lips curled. He wasn't learning anything. The conversation wasn't going well. If it were Neji, he'd have danced around Sasuke by now. If it were Sakura, he would've just used his fists. If it were Gaara--No. No, don't think like that.

Sasuke said, "You're angry," and the tone was cool, striving for disconnected. It didn't fit his expression.

"You fucked up," Naruto said at last. "You fucked up bad, Uchiha." He stood.

Sasuke stood, as well. They stared at each other. Sasuke was completely still. Naruto's hands were shaking again.

(It would be so easy.)

(It would be so easy. Sasuke had thrown a good punch, he remembered that, he might have been able to hold his own but he was hurt and--it would be so easy, just kick out at his leg, throw him down--)

"Don't leave. Don't you dare leave."

Each word was a bullet. Naruto's jaw dropped. "What the fuck?" he said. "Why the hell do you think you get to decide--"

I'm never letting you go again, Naruto remembered.

Air rushed in, sharp against his nose and throat. "You do. You think you do. You utter bastard."

"Why wouldn't I?"

The strained expression was gone. Sasuke's chin was tilted at a challenging angle. His lips were pulled back slightly.

It was an expression trying for arrogant, but Sasuke just looked lost.

Naruto took a step forward. (It would be so easy.) Sasuke kept sneering.

"You don't," Naruto hissed.

"You're not the one who decides that," Sasuke said, softly.

Naruto's sweeping hand caught the tray. The sting, narrow and sharp, traveled up his arm and shocked his elbow. The tray hit the ground a split second later. The jug shattered; the plates rolled and cracked. A knifenicked the wall, bounced, slid against carpet. Naruto leaned forward. "Thanks for breakfast, you fucking asshole," he hissed.

Sasuke had frozen. The shock and anger on his face didn't blend well.

Naruto walked to the door in a vacuum of silence. His every step was a rush of noise in his ears, louder than his breathing.

They'd only known each other for two weeks. And somehow this thought was like a betrayal, and he couldn't quite remember why. Naruto put one hand on the door. A part of him waited. His ears told him nothing: Sasuke wasn't moving, wasn't about to rush and tackle Naruto like he had that night--

Naruto opened the door. When he shut it, the heavy sound reverberated against his palm, rushing out into the hall.

And that was it. That was all it took. Naruto turned his back on the door. Gradually, his hands stopped trembling. His breathing slowed. Red lifted from his sight.

He went home. His left hand burned.