I've been working on shortening the chapters, because really, I go a bit crazy sometimes. Felt I made it... kind of. As always, tell me what you like or dislike so I know what to include more/less of. Cheers!

Week 2, Day 3

A whack to the back of Schmidt's head is what awakes him and makes him very aware of the pain in his head.

"Ouch, stop it!" he swivels a hand out behind him, before trying to bury himself more into the bed, away from whoever is beating him with a pillow.

"Morning, love." comes a sugar sweet voice from behind him. He turns with a glare on his face to see Effy smirking by the bed.

"What the fuck is wrong with you Effy, I need my beauty sleep and the pounding in my head could probably supply a rock metal band drumming for three concerts at least." he frowns.

"Breakfast time." she only states, looking innocent and not at the same time.

He sighs. "Is this about me and Katie last night?"

"What about you and Katie last night?" Effy pretends to be clueless as she's dressing up in ripped up shorts and a black tank top.

"Don't play stupid with me, I know you're all-seeing."

"Never heard of that." Effy shrugs, going into the bathroom.

"Fine, I had a good time with Katie, but I still want to stand with you, you know? Katie has her own drama with Freddie and Felix and I would be stupid to go over and mingle with them. Is that what you want to hear?" Schmidt calls out, holding his head.

"Sweet." is the only answer he gets from the bathroom. He rolls his eyes in exasperation as he falls back into the pillows.


"So this is how the world looks like sober." Felix mutters as he steps into the breakfast room with a pair of gigantic sunglasses, possibly borrowed from Katie.

"You all right there?" Thomas questions worriedly.

"Yes, I just drank myself half to death last night in my misery." Felix exaggerates as he looks accusingly towards where JJ is sitting.

JJ's eyes widens and he looks away, clearly avoiding the pending awkwardness.

"Well, you're not the only one who had a long night." Naomi wiggles her eyebrows, looking to Katie. Just to irritate her.

"Would you fucking shut up!" Katie barks back, contemplating if it would be okay to throw a fork into the eye of the blonde. Naomi only laughs, along with Emily, of the pissed off look at the other girl. Basically everyone knows what went down between her and Schmidt last night.

Cook bumps his shoulder into Schmidt where they're sitting farther up, earning a shit eating grin from the other.

"Sorry about your failed mission." he winks and smirks triumphantly.

"Oi! Don't forget I popped a cherry before you in 'ere!" Cook complains back.

"Oh yes, though I'm guessing it wasn't the cherry." he answers Cook and casts a knowing look towards Effy.

"Fuck off mate, working on it." Cook says, though he is getting extremely frustrated of the job. Especially after Effy just dragged him away last night to further tease him.

Everyone eats their fair share of food to get ready for the day while they chat and laughs about last nights events. Schmidt and Katie receiving most of the mocking, to the glee of one of them and the utter annoyance for the other.

A letter gets delivered to Katie, and she perks up instantly.

"Katie and Felix is possessing the power the african diamond contains, and will now be granted a date." she reads out loud, giving off a smirk as she's done reading.

"Well, darling, I suggest we put on our make-up and be gone!" Felix chants as he raises, the hangover seemingly short-lived.

"Does he wear make-up?" JJ whispers to Cook as the others treks out of the room, receiving a boisterous laugh in return.


When Katie and Felix is gone on their date, Cook and Emily finds themselves in the lounge. Cook is nursing his headache away with a smoke and Emily is sipping from a water bottle. A fine activity for the day thereafter.

"Oh man, how I miss spliff right now." Cook says, referring to the fact that any kind of drug is prohibited in on the hotel.

"I know something else I miss..." Emily mutters looking out towards the pool. Cook follows her line of sight and finds that shockingly it's not Naomi she's perving on, but Effy walking around in a tiny bikini. But well, Emily is only human, and though Naomi is definitely the fittest in here in her opinion, she is very allowed to stare at others. Especially since Naomi isn't giving her the desired attention.

"I hear ya, Red, totally there with you." Cook laughs, feeling the urges himself. Because fuck him, he's going to explode soon. Effy is teasing the shit out of him, and he's sharing room with Naomi, which he finds wildly attractive as well. It's basically torture for him.

He sits up straighter and starts drumming his hands on the table, making a rhythm. Emily watches him with a curious smile.

"Ooooh nooo," he starts to sing, "Tell me where that pussy gone, ooooh nooo, 'Cause it don't feel the same"

Emily starts to laugh as she recognises what he's singing, stating 'you're crazy!' as Cook sings. But she chimes in on the next part and they sing loudly together as Cook keeps the rhythm with his hands.

"I miss that pussy, that pussy, that pussy! Ooooh nooo!"

Emily starts clapping her hand on her thigh as they continue.

"Oooh noooo, why is this happening to me? Ooooh noooo, she told me that it was not missin', I miss that pussy, that pussy, that pussy, that pussy."

Suddenly Pandora comes bouncing in, having heard the singing.

"Awwww do you miss your pussies too? I miss mine super duper much! His name is Mr Fluffles but they refused me to bring him!" she says excitedly, sitting down beside Cook, staring at them wide-eyed.

Cook and Emily looks towards each other, both faces hilarious as they try to not burst out laughing.

"Yes that's right Panda, we really miss our pussies." Emily says, highly amused now.

Cook starts his rhythm again, and soon all three of them is sitting in the lounge hilariously singing along to the lyrics, though for slightly different reasons.

"Ooooh noooo, where did ya pussy go? Ooooh noooo, 'cause girl, I need to know, I miss that pussy, that pussy, that pussy, that pussy, ooooh nooo!"

At that exact moment, Naomi comes down the stairs from her room where she has been resting, walking past the comical choir.

"You guys are disgusting." she scoffs at them before continuing out into the sun.

"She doesn't like pussycats?" Pandora turns to the other, looking absolutely horrified and finally they can't hold in their laughter anymore.


Meanwhile Felix and Katie is off enjoying their date, being presented with a clothed table by the sea in a romantic setting. Various fruits and champagne is given and they seem to have a good time together.

"Oh this would've been perfect if you were straight and lush." Katie sighs after Felix feeds her with grapes.

"Well, I don't know about straight but 'lushness' is my strong side actually."

"Oh, I'm not trying to beat you down Felix, I'm just being real."

"Is it my imagination, or does Emily have bigger breasts than yours?" Felix answers.

"What?" Katie looks down to her chest before back to a smirking Felix. "Oh you did that on purpose! Fine, you're kind of like cute in a gay way."

"Thank you very much for that fine compliment." Felix rolls his eyes but continues feeding her grapes either way.

They have a delicious dinner under the swaying curtains and continues bantering with each other throughout it. Then they get a letter delivered to them.

Felix gingerly takes it and opens it, reading the contents out to his partner. "Tonight on Pandora's box both of you are excused along with a couple of your choosing."

"Like we get to choose someone who isn't going, like, along with us?" Katie frowns.

"Seems like it..." Felix muses, "What do you think happens there?"

"I have no idea, but obviously since we have the diamond and the power, there must be something bad happening. That's why we're choosing my sister and her additional boytoy to be excused."

"Are you sure? It could be a trap." Felix says.

"Why would it be a trap? It said so earlier that we possess the power so of course nothing good is coming out of Pandora's box tonight."

"Yeah, it could still be a trap." Felix protests.

"Whatever, we're saving my sister, and don't pretend like you don't agree with saving your little crush even though he obviously doesn't want to compare dick-sizes with you or whatever." Katie blows him off, certain in her case.

"I guess." Felix grumbles, frowning as he thinks of JJ.


They arrive back at the hotel and tells the news to the others. Of course worrying breaks loose as someone is not attending Pandora's box and the theories starts bouncing off tongues straight away. Especially from Cook who is almost a bit paranoid of the whole prospect.

Emily is of course ecstatic and is very much agreeing with her sister that something bad is about to happen.

As Katie is going into her room to change into something more pool friendly, Freddie appears from around a corner and grabs her elbow.

"What the fuck Freddie, you scared me half to death." Katie screeches.

"Sorry Katie, I just need to talk to you." he says.

"About what, and maybe it's not like the greatest idea doing it so openly." Katie gestures that everyone in front of the hotel can see them clearly.

"You're right," he says as he drags her inside the room. "Look, I know that you and Schmidt has this thing going on, and I can't do anything about that, but I understood that he's staying with Effy. So if me and Felix comes behind you, will you choose me like you promised?" Freddie asks.

"Yes, fuck's sake, but we can't exactly go around chatting about this where Felix can come in every second. We still own the diamond you know." Katie warns.

"I know, just wanted to check, okay?" Freddie smiles almost bashfully, scratching his hair.

Katie can't help but smile a bit at his shy antics, and almost blushes as he leans down to kiss the side of her mouth.

Soon he's out the door, Katie stands just looking after him. He was cute when he wanted to be. But she had Schmidt. Or had she? Was she merely sleeping with the enemy?


The gang escapes to Pandora's Box as the foursome four stays behind on the hotel. Felix and JJ stays out by the pool, Felix seemingly doing his last tries at getting somewhere with the cute nerd, while the sisters finds a quiet moment in the lounge.

Emily is lying with her head in her sister's lap as Katie drags her fingers slowly through red locks.

"You should really reconsider this Naomi thing, I'm telling you." Katie suddenly says.

Emily opens an eyes to scowl up at her sister. "Okay?"

"I'm just saying that she doesn't own an ounce of gayness in her. If you're going to start obsessing, I'd rather throw her out before she gets the chance to mess with your heart."

"Don't you dare throw her out." Emily frowns. "And you're the one to talk, Schmidt want to be your partner yet?"

"That's different."

"How is that different, you've been flirting for days."

"Because I see the way you look at her, okay! It started after that god-awful fight I had with her! You look at her like, I don't know, like she can be your queen in lesbian land."

"That is a nice visual..." Emily dreamily says, before catching herself. "But no, Katie, I don't look at her differently than what I look at other girls." Emily defends, because really, she doesn't.

"You do. You're my sister. I know you, fuck's sake. And for Schmidt, he's hun and all, real good in bed, and I wouldn't mind tapping that a few more times, but seriously Emily, she's treating you like shit."

"She's not treating me like shit."

"She's cruel towards you, and I don't know if that's your people's way of flirting or whatever, but this passive aggressive hot n' cold pursuit seems well unhealthy to me."

"Says the girl who once screwed two guys in a night, while being on a date with a completely different one."

"Fuck off, if we're talking about slut nomination, you come in just as strong."

"Fine, but don't worry okay. I'm not getting feelings for her. It's just really fun having someone to focus on, even though she might end up as being straight anyway."

"Might? Oh Em, she is. But fine, have your summer project, but don't loose sight on the game in here. We're winning, right?"

"Right." Emily chuckles, glad she got her sister in here.


The five others enters the room where Pandora's Box is situated in the middle and they places themselves around it. Freddie opens it and picks up a letter.

"In the box lays six cards, and one of them is the queen of spades. Whoever gets the queen of spades will not be allowed to stand with their partner tomorrow on the couple ceremony. Freddie doesn't have a partner and will not get a card, but he will decide the first to draw a card and if that isn't the queen, the drawer decides the next and so on."

"Alright," Freddie smirks, finally glad something is going his way. He looks down in the box and sees some cards lying front down.

"Okay, hopefully the first one is the queen of spades, so Schmidt, you may get the honour." Freddie smirks at him, before looking briefly to Effy.

"That's well revealing, mate." Schmidt laughs but picks up the first card nevertheless, looking at it before turning it towards the others. "Ace of diamonds." he smirks, looking smug towards a not amused Freddie. "Well, honey," Schmidt punctuates to infuriate Freddie, "I think you can take the next one."

Schmidt thinks that the queen is probably in the last cards and is doing this to save his partner.

Effy smirks at Freddie as she leans forward, showing a bit of cleavage just to reel Freddie on even more, and picks a card. "Ooooh, six of spades." she says to Freddie, smiling of the fact that she and Schmidt is allowed to stand together tomorrow, and Freddie won't come to her then.

Effy looks at the remaining four. "Well, I don't want any of you to get it, but.. Fuck it, Cook, take it away."

Cook leans forward and grabs one, showing it to everyone. "Nine of spades, close but not quite." he breathes heavily. But they're not safe yet. He really wants to stand behind Naomi tomorrow but that means that she has to not get the queen too.

"Naomikins, you better not draw that card, babe." he says seriously to her. He holds his breath as she draws the next one, looking at it herself for a while before turning it around. "Ten of spades." he says, relieved.

"I'm sorry guys, but it's gonna be you anyways." Naomi smiles sadly at Thomas and a confused Pandora. "Thomas, you can go."

He picks up the penultimate card and sighs heavily. When he turns it, it's the queen of spades.

"What does that mean, did you win?" Pandora asks him.

"No Panda, it means you and me can't stand together tomorrow. We can't be partners anymore."

"Oh bummer." Pandora's face falls.

They closes Pandora's Box for this time and heads back to the hotel to tell about the last developments.


"I don't fucking understand why I have to be the one to sacrifice myself!" Schmidt complains to Effy as they're in their room.

"I'm doing this for Pandora." Effy provides.

"Yes, you! Yet it's me that has to be her fucking partner!"

"Don't complain, we're helping them."

"I don't want to, I want to be your partner and you know that! Why can't Cook and Thomas switch places for instance?"

"Because, like I said, I want to do it for her." Effy repeats. She really does want to help out Pandora in this situation, because she doesn't think Thomas has a chance with any of the others.

"This is unfair." Schmidt sulks as he throws himself on the bed.

"Suck it up, it's only for a week and you can come back."

"A week," he shudders, "I don't want to live in the same room as her for even a minute."

"Rude." Effy remarks.

"You know I don't get her Effy. She's like a human kangaroo on speed. And she doesn't own an ounce of fashion sense in her. I have absolutely no idea how this is going to work out."

"Well it just has to."

"Why?"

"Because I say so." Effy easily offers.

Schmidt huffs to himself as he stares up into the ceiling. Effy moves into the bathroom to re-apply her eye make-up for tonight's drinks in the bar. Then an idea comes to his mind.

"Effy! How about I go to Katie, Freddie or Felix or whoever of those two gnomes you choose go to Pandora and then Thomas goes to you?" he grins.

"Nope." Effy answers.

"Aw, don't be like that. It's a great plan, made of my own hard working brain cells."

"Because no, Schmidt. It will be like I said."

"No seriously, I'll go talk to Katie right now and we'll fix it!" Schmidt is up and on his way towards the door as Effy suddenly appears in his way, looking strictly into his eyes.

"If you do this, I'll make up a scheme to send you out of the hotel tomorrow." she challenges. The last thing she wants is Schmidt going to Katie. She can handle they having their little flirt, but she can't control him if he stays with her.

Schmidt whimpers at the threat. "Okay, fine, you get your way."

"As always." he adds quietly as he goes back to the bed lying down, thinking how terrible it's going to be to share a room with Pandora. And on top of that, there's a bathtub in there. It's going to be hell. But oh well, he won't cry in advance and he wonders if Katie is up for round 2 later.


All the guests gathers in the lounge for drinks and laughs. Some gets horribly drunk and some disappears suddenly in the middle of the party, probably for round two, and everyone is having a real blast. Well, some less than others, like Freddie, but the secret deal with Katie is keeping him going.

Effy informs Pandora and Thomas of the plans of tomorrow and Thomas can finally somewhat relax, knowing that everything will be okay.

As the night comes to an end and people stumbles back to their room, Pandora and Thomas finds them brushing their teeth together in front of their mirror while smiling and bumping into each other for fun.

"Argh arr arraara arr" Pandora tries to say, but still has toothpaste and water in her mouth.

Thomas only laughs at her. "I can't understand you."

Pandora spits out. "This is our last night together, do you know that?"

"Yes, but next week you'll come back to me, right?"

"Of course Thommo! Bonkers, this is like really romantic! We're just like those two old scrooges in that book! Romeo and Juliet! Kept apart but still want to be together!"

"You're right Pandora, will you accompany me to our bed for the last time this week?" he holds out his hand to her and they goes and scoots under the sheets, ending up looking into each other's eyes.

"Thommo..." Pandora whispers. "Since it's going to be a long time until next time we'll share a bed, do you think that..." she trails off.

"Panda," Thomas sighs, "you know I want to wait. I'm so very fond of you, but I don't want to use you for that. It will be ten times better if we wait until we are re-united." he smiles.

"Oh, okay." Pandora tries to not show how her face falls, and instead nuzzles into Thomas' side.

Thomas smile to himself of the proximity, and as he looks down on Pandora, he thinks that she might be the most beautiful girl he's ever seen.


Songs used in the chapter: Dedication To My Ex - Lloyd, Andre 3000, Lil Wayne.

The twist will start appearing next chapter.. Some of them at least..