No other sound, than the voice of sixteen year old Asuma Sarutobi, registered in her ears as he told her that her husband, Shikamaru Nara, was dead.
Killed in action.
She felt nothing when she crumbled to the floor, sobbing into her hands, and Asuma knealed down to put his hand on her shoulder.
Nara Shikamaru was dead.
The genius of the Leaf was gone, for good.
Four days earlier……
It was a Saturday, the academy was not open, but there at his desk was Shikamaru. He was leaving early tomorrow morning for a mission with his team.
He groaned.
He was NOT a morning person.
If he were a bachelor he would just sleep in, but his troublesome…loving wife, made sure he was on time.
Tap, tap.
A yawn and then a mumbled, "It's open."
The door creaked as it opened and in walked Temari, speak of the devil, with their two kids in tow.
Shikamaru yawned again and stretched. "Hey.."
"Thought you might want some lunch." Temari said handing him a lunch box.
"Thanks, I'm starving."
Shikamaru picked up his chopsticks, after having lifted the box top, and was just about to take a bite when he noticed Temari give Yoshino a look that made her look to the floor.
Shikamaru sighed and put down his chopsticks. "Okay what is it?"
"Hu? What do you mean?" Yoshino asked.
"Why are you acting like you're hiding something?"
"I-Im not!"
Shikamaru raised an eyebrow.
Shikaku snickered at his sisters discomfort, however immediately shut up when his mother shot him a look.
Yoshino sighed. "Fine….uh….mom you ask him!"
Temari crossed her arms. "Nope, that's all you."
She groaned and muttered something under her breath.
"Excuse me? What was that? I'm afraid you're going to have to speak up." Shikamaru said, crossing his arms over his chest.
"Oh fine! Can I please go out with Asuma today? He has to leave tomorrow and he asked me out and I really wanna go! Please please please, dad?" She asked clasping her hands together in a begging fashion, teal eyes wide and pleading.
Shikamaru looked over at Temari. "Why me?"
"You're her father, you decide about the dating thing."
Shikamaru looked at his daughter, he closed his eyes and his hands came together in that pose he did when he was thinking. Temari laughed a bit, she hadn't seen him do that in a long time.
Five minutes passed, and Yoshino didn't budge from her begging position, Shikaku had settled himself in one of the chairs by the window and watched with mild interest.
Shikamaru finally opened his eyes and looked straight at Yoshino. "Alright."
Yoshino nearly burst with joy, she flung her arms around his neck and hugged him tight. "Really? Oh thank you dad!"
Shikamaru smiled a bit and patted her back.
Yoshino got up and ran to the door. "Thanks!"
Temari looked at Shikamaru. "Really?"
Shikamaru shrugged. "Why not? He's already kissed her I mean what else could….."
Temari arched her eyebrow, a small amused smirk on her face, watching as realization crept onto Shikamaru's face as he registered what he had just said.
She had never seen Shikamaru jump up and run so quickly in her life.
"Wait a minute there young lady!" Temari and Shikaku heard him shout as he chased after Yoshino.
Mother and son looked at each other and laughed.
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That night, Temari was walking around her and Shikamaru's home.
Shikaku had decided to spend the night with at his grandparent's house, and Yoshino was still out with Asuma. Probably would end up sneaking in the house sometime in the early morning.
She had finally convinced Shikamaru that nothing would happen, that they were too young, and that he had nothing to worry about, because after all he had raised Asuma himself.
Temari snorted and shook her head. 'Probably taught the poor kid that man and woman crap.'
She was ascending the stairs when she suddenly stopped.
She stared at the family portrait, taken when Shikaku was just a baby. Her hard eyes softened as she looked at herself, only a few years younger, holding the sleeping baby with dark hair on his head, and Shikamaru with a four/five year old Yoshino on his shoulders.
She looked at the picture just to the left of it.
It was the photo they had taken just after Yoshino's graduation from the academy, her leaf village headband shining in the sun around her neck, the way her mother had worn hers when she was her age. Asuma had somehow managed to sneak into the photo, his hand resting on her shoulder, smiling proudly.
She stepped up one step to get a better look at the next picture.
It was a recent one taken of both of their kids. It still amazed Temari at just how much her children looked like their father. Shikaku could have been his twin, well him and Shotaru.
"Guess all the Nara men look alike." Temari said softly.
And Yoshino, well she looked identical to her name-sake in her younger years, right down to the hair-style with the three unruly pieces of hair that refused to stay tucked in.
Temari really didn't mind that her children didn't look like her, they were still hers, and they both had her stunning eyes that changed color from deep blue to pale teal. She smiled and walked up to her bedroom.
She breathed in and out deeply, her eyes closing. 'Guess Shikamaru's out with his teammates again.'
It was kind of funny how now, she could think of him out and about with Yamanaka Ino, and not feel any kind of jealousy or worry.
'Probably because she's married….and Shikamaru's too lazy to have an affair.'
Temari rolled over onto her stomach and looked out of her window, the moon bathed her in its soft light, relaxing her. Tomorrow she'd wake up, pack for Shikamaru, cook breakfast, wake up Shikamaru, make him eat, make sure he'd showered and put on clean clothes, make sure Yoshino said goodbye, then send him off telling him to stop by his parents house to say goodbye to Shikaku and his parents and younger brother. Then she'd wait for a mission to keep her mind off the fact that he wouldn't be home when she got home.
She closed her eyes and thought back to their lives before the kids, before the wedding, everything. She had been a foreign visitor from Suna, coming for the Chunin Exams. He had been the lazy slacker that couldn't care less if he made chunin or not. They had fought in the exams and she had lost, but he gave her the win. Later she would be his savior, then he would return the favor. Later still she would return as a jounin, and ambassador from Suna, and he would be her guide. The next time she came it was for a funeral, for his master. She would follow him into the forest and they would share their first kiss. He left the next day then, too. Then he returned and that night was the night of their first time.
She let out a sigh.
After that night everything changed, for the better of course, but she wished sometimes she could go back to their teenaged days. When they didn't worry about kids, or jobs, or anything and were just able to be.
She especially missed when they were able to just spend time together.
Between Shikaku getting ready to start at the academy in just a year, Yoshino and her boy troubles, Temari trying to find time to visit Suna, Shikamaru's job, and the fact that they were expecting their THIRD child, they hardly spent time together anymore.
Temari opened her eyes and looked out the window again, the moon was higher up in the sky, and she wondered if maybe she had dozed for just a moment. She noticed that the bed was still empty beside her, meaning Shikamaru was probably still out. Temari let out another sigh and she got up and went to close the blinds, not noticing that someone else was in the room.
Her breath caught in her throat when a pair of arms wrapped around her waist.
"Scared ya." Shikamaru said chuckling a bit.
Temari rolled her eyes. "Uh huh."
"Oh come on admit it….I scared you." She felt him grin against the back of her neck.
"Well…maybe just a little." She whispered smiling back to him.
"Coming to bed?" He asked, his arms loosening around her waist just a bit.
Temari turned around in his arms to look at him. "You're leaving tomorrow…."
Shikamaru looked at her strangely. "Yeah…."
Temari frowned. "You're leaving tomorrow…..you're leaving me tomorrow for who knows how many days…..and lately we haven't spent any time together."
She lifted her hand up to stop his protests. "So tonight….I want us too."
Shikamaru was slowly but surely catching on, when she moved forward and rested her forehead on his chest, her arms wrapped tight around his torso.
"Baby…….please lay me down on our bed…….touch me the way only you can. Make me feel like a woman tonight."
She said it so softly, and she rarely called him 'baby', and she looked so god damned beautiful how could he refuse?
Shikamaru backed up towards the bed, turning them around so that she was beneath him. He kissed her fully on the lips, his hand reaching into her hair to free it from its ties. He backed away to look down at her, with her golden hair in a halo around her head.
Shikamaru smiled softly. "You're hair was down that first time…"
Temari gave a soft laugh. "Just shut up and kiss me."
"Well if you insist."
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Shikamaru had actually woken before his wife.
He looked over at her sleeping figure with a smile, she was out like a light. Not a surprise. How many times had they gone at it? Two? Three?
He eased himself off the bed, careful not to wake her, and made his way into the bathroom. He showered, brushed his teeth, pulled up his hair, wrote Temari a note and then made his way downstairs.
He entered the kitchen to find his daughter, Yoshino, pouring herself a bowl of cereal. She heard him and turned. "Hey dad." She said with a yawn and smile.
"Morning." He said back, walking over and getting himself a bowl.
They sat at the table across from each other, in comfortable silence.
After they had finished Shikamaru stood up and placed both bowls in the sink.
"So you're leaving today?"
"Yup."
"When will you be back?"
"Dunno."
Yoshino frowned.
Shikamaru laughed. "I think you're more interested on when Asuma is getting back than me."
Yoshino's face colored. "I have no idea what you're talking about."
"Sure you don't." Shikamaru smiled knowingly.
Yoshino rolled her eyes. "Whatever…." She glanced over at him, smiled, and then wrapped her arms around him in a bear hug.
Shikamaru smiled and hugged her back.
"You know I miss you too."
"I know, it's just fun to tease you."
"Oh shut-up."
Shikamaru laughed and leaned down a bit. "You know….Asuma should be at the gate by now….if you wanna say goodbye."
Yoshino looked up at her father and smiled.
He squeezed her gently and she kissed him on the cheek before she bounded out the door. "Love you dad!" She called.
"Love you too."
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Shikamaru made his way to his parents home, hands in his pockets.
He knocked on the door and it was opened by his mother, the elder Yoshino. "Bought time lazybones!"
Shikamaru rolled his eyes. "Yeah yeah."
Yoshino was about to shout and scold him when a hand rested on her shoulder. "Shikamaru! Get in here already, your son's about to fall asleep again."
Shikamaru laughed and stepped inside, glancing around he finally saw his son on the couch. His arms behind his head and his mouth open slightly, snoring, Shotaru dozed just to the left of him.
Shikamaru tip-toed behind the couch, leaning his head down between them.
"WAKE UP!"
"GAHHHH!" They both jumped at least five feet in the air.
Shikamaru and Shikaku both laughed at their sons' expense.
Both of the boys looked annoyed, glaring at Shikamaru.
Shikamaru grinned at them both. "I'm leaving now, see yah later kiddo." He said to his son, ruffling his hair slightly. "You too bro."
"Ugh….dad….your too old to say bro." Shikaku said with a yawn and a stretch.
Shikamaru rolled his eyes and headed for the door. "See yah later." He said with a casual wave over the shoulder.
"Be safe!" Was the last thing he heard his mother say.
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It was eleven a.m. when Temari woke up, her eyes lazily looked around the room and eventually landed on a note.
You, for once, overslept.
Couldn't bare to wake you up.
I ate, said goodbye to the kids, and should be back in a few days.
I love you,
Shikamaru.
Temari stared at the note for a long time.
Then she freaked out.
She ran around the house, getting her clothes on and trying to pull her hair up at the same time, falling over in the process. When she was at least descent she ran out of the house, running as fast as her legs could carry her, to the gates' of Konohagakure.
If she was quick enough she could maybe just catch them.
She made it to the gate, but no sign of her husband. "Dammit!" She ran a few meters down the path and after a few minutes she was about to just give up and turn around when she heard a familiar voice.
"Come on Shikamaru-sensei, we gotta get going!" Asuma shouted impatiently.
"Ahh leave me alone."
Temari walked slowly the rest of the way, making it just as Shikamaru was getting up to follow his three students who were walking ahead of him.
"Shikamaru!"
"hm?"
He turned just as the blond woman threw her arms around him and kissed him on the lips, hard.
Shikamaru stumbled back a bit, putting his hands on her waist, not even having enough time to respond to her kiss when Temari broke away from him and smiled. "Couldn't let you leave without doing that." She said and pulled away completely, turning and strutting down the path back to Konoha.
Shikamaru watched her, his mouth open.
"T-troublesome…"
Present Day…..
Temari stood between her brothers.
She stared silently ahead.
At the grave of her husband.
Distantly, she heard her daughter sobbing into the shoulder of young Asuma, her son and brother-in-law's sniffling, her mother-in-law's wailing, and her father-in-law's silence.
It was all so deafening.
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She stood outside in the pouring rain, in the backyard of the Nara home. Inside her family, Shikamaru's teammates, and others from the village, were all gathered in mourning.
Out of all the people in there, Asuma was taking it the hardest. He had left during the middle of the funeral and no-one had seen him since, not even his mother or her daughter.
Temari rested her hand on the crown of her stomach. 'History is repeating itself…..' She thought grimly.
Temari glanced over her shoulder at the small, grim, gathering.
Her daughter and son were seated side by side, leaning against each other. Chiyo, her niece, was sitting beside Shotaro, patting his back comfortingly. Her brothers and Matsuri were talking with Naruto and the others, about what? She couldn't be sure. Temari frowned and turned, looking at the Nara clan forest. She walked forward, into the forest, into the only place in the world right now that she felt comfort.
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Temari sat in the middle of a clearing, the same clearing that she and Shikamaru had shared their first kiss and their first time.
She hugged her knees to her chest.
Just a few days ago she had been waiting for him to return.
I waited for you today
But you didn't show
No no no
Temari clenched her fists. She had waited, he didn't show, and now where was he now?
I needed You today
So where did You go?
He was dead.
Like his sensei, he was gone, and he had said that he would be back.
You told me to call
Said You'd be there
She shut her eyes tight, thinking, praying, that when she opened them he would be there.
And though I haven't seen You
Are You still there?
"Shikamaru……."
Silence.
"Shikamaru."
Silence.
"SHIKAMARU!"
…..silence.
I cried out with no reply
Tears streamed down the side of her face, though you couldn't tell for the rain. Her chest ached with every breath she took. She missed him, his arms around her, his hand in hers, just him around her.
'No….this can't be it….he can't be gone….he's here…he's here.' She repeated this in her mind over and over, hoping that willing it would make it come true. She couldn't be alone…she just couldn't.
And I can't feel You by my side
So I'll hold tight to what I know
You're here and I'm never alone
'Temari….'
That voice….
She raised her head, hearing her name. She looked all around her, but saw no-one. "…Shikamaru?" She whispered.
She didn't see anything, but she was sure she heard something. Temari was positive that somebody was there, watching her.
"Shikamaru…"
And though I cannot see You
And I can't explain why
Such a deep, deep reassurance
You've placed in my life
She felt a pair of arms wrap around her waist, a pressure against her back, and a chin rest on her shoulder. 'Troublesome woman…'
Temari shut her eyes tight. "Lazy-ass…."
A chuckle. "Yeah yeah…."
"Please don't tell me.....don't tell me you have to go…"
A nod against her shoulder. "I have to go….."
The tears slid down her face. "B-but….we can't….you promised me."
We cannot separate
'Cause You're part of me
And though You're invisible
I'll trust the unseen
"It'll be alright Temari, you're the strongest person I know. You'll get through this. You have to be there for our kids…" She felt a hand on her stomach. "This one too…"
"But what about me? Whose going to be there for me…?" More tears fell.
Another chuckle. "I'll always be there, you know that. You may not see me, but I'll be there…." A warm pressure against her lips.
"Always…."
So there will be one more chapter! Stay tuned
