A/N: THIS CHAPTER WAS SO AWKWARD TO WRITE! I just.. didn't know whether I, personally, was ready for this chapter, but I knew if I didn't write this, the WHOLE STORY I'd planned out would need to change. So... I struggled and wrote it. I'm not confident with it, and I'm still um-ing and ah-ing about it. This chapter does tell us a little about Aiko-san, and we get to meet a character we haven't met yet. Someone who connects certain characters together ;)
Chapter Seven
"The truth is that I am…" Damn, this was harder to say than he thought. No! He was going to try! Someone… he wanted… he just wanted someone who understood what it was like. If he could just tell her… maybe she could get her brother to help him. He knew what it was like… if only he could just… tell… her… "I-I am… I'm… transsexual…"
Len didn't want to look up at her, didn't want to see her shock or disapproving look. However, he wouldn't lie to her. He couldn't bring himself to lie to her. He had to learn to trust someone, somewhere, some day. He had to. And for some strange reason... it felt as if some sort of weight on his shoulders had been lifted off. He felt somewhat… lighter.
"…"
Aiko-san was silent for what felt like forever. Then, suddenly he heard a quiet voice speak up. "Thank you… for telling me…I know it isn't easy to talk about stuff like that, so thank you."
That wasn't… quite what he expected. Slowly looking up, he found Aiko-san sitting perfectly still, eyes closed. She sat there for a moment then nodded to herself. When she reopened her eyes, there was something in them that Len didn't understand. Then, she stood up, went over to the window and closed the curtains. He began to speak up but she'd bet him to the chase.
"I've never talked to anyone about this," she said softly as she pulled off her shirt. "I'm body conscious too. In middle school, I asked a guy I liked out and he replied he didn't date fat girls. I wasn't fat, I was pretty sure I was slender, but that was what he said. Those words were like a knife in the stomach that when he walked away, I threw up. From there, everything went downhill. Every time I looked in the mirror I saw some fat person looking back at me. In the end, I fell depressed. I didn't change my eating habits, in fact, I ate more, and then when everyone was in bed, I'd force myself to throw up.
"It went on for months, Len. So many months," she ditched her shirt and turned around. Len couldn't help but stare at her. She looked perfectly fine, she was really pretty… "I was caught by my younger brother who told my parents. I claimed it was one off, but my brother said he heard me doing this every night. I went through heaps of treatment, had tones of 'educational' classes to change my habits, but it only got worse. I kept doing it, and one day, I fainted in the toilet after throwing up blood. I'd damaged my throat, and something happened with my stomach. I don't remember the details, but I ended up in hospital for months. I hated myself and my body, but my mother finally told me she went through something similar." Aiko held a hand to her stomach. "I was anorexic by then. You could see all my ribcage under the skin. I'd lost colour in my face… I was practically a walking corpse.
"I started treatment again, started trying hard to take control of myself. Eventually, I slowly began to get better, slowly began to put on weight. It was only until last year when I finally felt comfortable in my body again. When I did, I grabbed the photos of what happened to me, confronted the son of a bitch who did this to me and showed him what he'd done. Then I turned around and said that the woman he wanted was unrealistic and disgusting. She would be all bones, no meat. She'd be unhealthy and could probably die because of her health. He was unrealistic, and he was a dick head. He got angry, said some nasty words but I didn't let them affect me. Wanna know what I did?"
"What?"
"Stripped my shirt off like this and announce proudly that I loved my body, and a woman with curves was ten times better than someone who is nothing but sticks and bones that will break if you touch her. Then told him if that was what he wanted, he should go dig a grave and fuck a corpse, then walked out. I got into a load of trouble for walking around shirtless, but it was the proudest day of my life. After that, a lot of girls came around in tears, thanking me for what I did. Apparently he was a dick to even the thin chicks. I apologize because what I said was nasty, but they were thankful that I showed him up. He didn't do it again, and the girls learnt better than confessing to him. By the end of the year, even the guys were disgusted in him. I was asked out a lot after it too, one guy even saying he liked strong girls, but I'm not strong," Aiko opened her teary eyes, and gave him a shaky smile. "I'm not strong either Len. I'm scared too… scared of what people will think about me. I sometimes wonder what would happen when I finally get intimate with another man. Would he look at me and love me for who I am… or will he cast me aside because I'm "fat"? This is how you've felt… about your body too. When it came down to it, would the person you fell in love with would love you for who you are or toss you aside? We'll always have a relationship in our life that doesn't work. Some people will have more, it just happens. It's scary, but it happens."
His fingers were wrinkled. Sighing, Len pulled the plug in the kitchen sink and turned to look at the dishes the café staff had piled up on the sink next to him and sighed. All he had to do was finish washing these and then he was done for the night. There was still two loads left, so instead of standing there and wasting time, he refilled the sink with hot water and begun washing up again.
Tuesday had been eventful. Aiko-san had confessed so much, but he saw that it was mental weight that dropped off her own shoulders too. They'd bared so much, and most of the afternoon was looking at themselves in the mirror, completely naked. He'd never really looked at himself, being so ashamed, but if she could stand there with her own scars, he wasn't going to be beaten.
In the end, he went home feeling lighter. He tried on the bathes with a new found confidence and felt satisfied, though they had to return the other's the next day since they were just different sizes of the same pair. Wednesday had been awkward, with Len being constantly reminded he saw her naked and had to hide his face every time he thought about it. Wednesday was also when Len made up with Shion-senpai, who constantly apologized. Len would forgive him… eventually.
Thursday was boring, though Aiko-san and he sat together at recess, talking about a few things. She was making an effort to talk to him every day, so he felt he should put some effort into it. It was today, Friday, that had been the craziest when she decided to join Len and Gakupo for lunch. It confused the hell out of Gakupo, but he went with it and talked to her as if they had been friends for years. Len admired the way they did that, even though it was obvious that neither of them actually liked each other (something about Aiko hating Gakupo for punching Shion-senpai in the face, and Gakupo hating her for being friends with Shion-senpai who'd hurt Len). Still they were pretty convincing, even if at times their eyes and smiles were menacing.
He hoped to god they would finally get along. If Aiko-san was serious about when she said she'd help him win Shion-senpai's heart, then he was going to need them to play nice. It was funny though, when she told him as he left her house she'd help him, Len thought he saw a little sadness in her eyes. Aiko-san probably liked Shion-senpai, but was giving that all up.
That actually hurt him more than it should have.
Nevertheless, tomorrow was Shion-senpai's pool party, and Len was going. He'd agreed to go if Shion-senpai stopped apologizing, so he better keep his end of the bargain. Still, never the less, he really didn't want to go… but he had to.
Sighing, Len focused on the chore ahead of him despite the throbbing in his hands. A few minutes later, he was draining and refilling the sink for the last load of dishes when he heard the door to the kitchen open. It was probably the last of the staff coming in to help him clean. They normally did once the café was closed up for the night.
"Len-kun?"
Nope, not a staff member, Len thought as he jumped five feet off the ground. Spinning around while still keeping his hands in the sink, he looked at the pretty green haired girl lean by the counter behind him, smiling ever so sweetly. No, it was not green, he often had to correct himself whenever he thought of it that way, just in case he opened his mouth and said so. She really had a knack to tell people it was teal, and she was rebelling against the world by dyeing her hair that colour. He was still trying to work out why she was still at that prestigious school she was currently attending. Then again, when you had another famous diva there who'd dyed her hair green (and literally green), it wasn't surprising she hadn't been kicked out.
Of course, a lot of people would be confused when they realised Kagamine Len knew new pop sensation Hatsune Miku. Regardless, here she was, watching him with that killer smile of hers, her blue eyes watching him as he was watching her. "Stuck with the crappy jobs, again?"
"It was my night to wash," Len answered, turning away. He and the other cooks often took it in turns on who washed, as well as the maids who'd take turns drying up. Now that he thought about it… "You sent my helper home, didn't you?"
"Well, since my uncle owns the place, I thought it would be fine. Plus, I'm not afraid to get my hands dirty or wet to help out." Miku replied, pushing off the counter and grabbing the towel nearby. She began to dry the stack of dishes there. "Besides, I wanted to talk to you. It's been a while."
Len glanced at her then muttered, "You saw me last week."
"Alright, I really wanted to see Rin," Miku laughed. "You know me when it comes to your sister. I just can't get enough of how cute she is."
Rin was pretty cute. Of course, Miku didn't know about particulars, but he never felt the need to. Miku wasn't judgemental, and she'd catch on relatively early something was up, but she never pushed her way in and tried to work out what it was. "Does this mean I'm not getting any homework done tonight?"
"Nope, nope, definitely not."
Len sighed loudly as he pulled the plug. "I figured as much."
A/N: MIKU! And someone was hinted at there. Guess who that is ;) They'll show up some time later. Of course, this isn't the character who Len and Miku are connected to. It's someone else, someone we meet next chapter (well, we've already met them, but you know what I mean). Miku only gets a small part because this chapter was heavy and I didn't want to mood ruined too much.
And yes, Len and Aiko did see each other naked. I was actually going to write that scene, but... I didn't know how to write it, so I only mentioned it.
And will Aiko and Gakupo ever get along? Who knows ;)
