Disclaimer: I do not own KH. Don't remind me… I WISH I owned Cloudy Woudy from FF7, but sadly, I do not.

Some Random Reviewer: I was laughing when I read your review. Namine pissed equals End of The World. And thank you for advertising on Gamefaqs! Thank You for the review!

To everyone else: THANK YOU! REVIEWS KEEP ME IN A KAIRI BASHING MOOD.

I just went through a mini surgery and I am all giggly. Please excuse my spelling and/or if the chappy seems too stupid. But sometimes the spelling is necessary.

WARNING: Reference to DIRTY MAGAZINE'S! But it's not Axel…Sex reference too.

Chapter 7: Dirty Magazine's and Diabolical Plans


"No, Sora."

"Oh, Come on! Pwease!" He begged, his blue eyes reverting to their watery appearance. Sometimes, he had to look this pitiful, it was an instinct.

His sister sighed and crossed her legs. She swirled her spoon around, watching her cereal swirl around. "Sora… what did I just say?"

He growled at her. "I thought you said that you would help me." She stopped playing with her cereal and stared blankly at Sora.

"Excuse me? If I said something like that you probably drugged me. Or I might have gone insane…" He grinned at her.

"I might have done something along the lines…" He mumbled out loud purposely. She raised an eyebrow, but shrugged it off. "Please?"

She took a deep breath, and actually looked like she was going to say yes. "NO." Sora's shoulder's drooped and he walked out of the dining room, leaving his sister to play with her cereal. She stared after him and sighed. "Good Luck Sora."

"Okay! I'm ready!" Sora shouted. "But I have a feeling I'm not gonna find the glass." He sighed and heard Riku laugh.

"Well, that's why I'm here to help you." Riku said. He glanced at Larxene, who besides him was helping Sora. "Um… Didn't you say that your sis was gonna help you?"

"WELL! MY GOOD FOR NOTHING SISTER," He shouted into the doorway of his house. "OBVIOUSLY CAN'T KEEP A FRIGGIN' PROMISE TO SAVE HER LIFE!"

"Um… Sweetie… Sora…" Larxene started. "She isn't going to respond to that. Besides, she has a good excuse for not helping."

"Excuse? What kind of excuse?"

"Well… She and Namine are going for lunch today to discuss something…" She explained. Sora gave her a skeptical look. "You'll find out later."

"Alright, time to get going… where to first?" Riku asked.


"See? This is my favorite." Axel said, handing over the magazine to Dante. Dante took it and gazed at it.

"Wow… she has such a perfect body…" Dante said, amazed by the object of his attention. "Very Beautiful."

"Yeah." Axel agreed. "And this one…" Axel pointed to the next page. "This one is actually very easy to get. Everything about her is perfect!"

Kara stood on the other side of the wall, listening to her husband and Axel talking about something-some GIRL- who had a perfect body and obviously was a PERFECT WHORE. She glanced at the stairway and saw her daughter proceeding down, humming some song she heard on the radio earlier. "Iris." She said. Iris stopped and looked blankly at her mother.

"I swear, I did not do it Mom." She quickly explained. Kara looked at her strangely but grabbed Iris' arm and dragged her to the wall. "Listen."

"I would love to have a piece of her." She heard Axel's voice. She turned red. She turned from the wall and stomped into the next room, her mom followed her.

"Okay, What the HELL are you two talking about?" She crossed her arms and glared at Axel.

"Just about these beauties…" Axel said, though he never did finish his sentence. Iris had hit him upside the head. "What's that for?"

"You're trying to get my dad into those… THOSE dirty magazines! He's a happily married man! With a good sex life at that." She pointed towards the magazines. Kara blushed at the last comment.

"How did you…" Kara trailed off, embarrassed.

"Why do you think I spend the night at Selphie's sometimes?" Iris asked, a bit embarrassed that she said that herself.

Kara shrugged and watched Iris turn her head towards Axel. Axel rubbed his head, preparing to run. "They are BOATS!" Dante stopped his daughter from attacking the other man. Iris glanced at the magazine and sure enough it was…

About Boats.

She stopped, she stared, and she blushed. "Er… Um… Sorry?"

Kara had left the room in a rush, leaving the house in fact. She couldn't blame this on her mom now. Axel grinned. "Oh, it's understanding… I mean… Who wouldn't get jealous when it comes to me?"

Iris' blush turned darker. "Don't flatter yourself, who would fall for a egotistical jerk like you? No one. Maybe a couple of sixty year old women might fall for your idiotic pick up lines, but not me."

"Sure, keep telling yourself that.." Axel waved his hand and headed for the front door. "I'm going to meet up with Roxas, later."

The young girl gaped after Axel. "THAT DAMNED PERVERTED…" She left the room, mumbling more curses. Dante shrugged and pulled out another magazine.

He chuckled. "How does she think I learn to give great sex?"


"No, I'm sorry dear. We don't have it in stock anymore. We just sold the last one." The lady at the counter told Sora.

"Whom did you sell it to?" This store was the last one he knew of, that sold any glass.

"Kairi." The lady answered and turned to go into her office. Sora thanked her and left the store.

"Well?" Larxene asked as Sora kissed her cheek as he had been doing for 'good luck'.

"They sold their last one to…" Larxene and Riku leaned in closer. "To Kairi."

Riku slapped his forehead. "Great. Just the person we need to see."

"Who said we are going to see her?" Sora asked, crossing his arms. He bit his lip though. 'I need that glass!' He thought.

Larxene groaned. "Well… sure you are!" Sora and Riku stared at her, confused. "Listen, you need that glass or who knows what your mother will do! She might try to kill me for all we know!" She placed her hands on her hips and kissed Sora on lips. "And you wouldn't want that now would you?"

He blushed. "No…" He raced past Larxene and headed to Kairi's.

Riku laughed. "Wow… you know how get him going." Larxene smirked at Sora's best friend.


"So, here's what we do." Namine started, noting that Iris was intently listening to her. She paused for just a moment to study the girl's eyes. "Boy, she really wants to destroy Kairi." She whispered. Iris raised her eyebrow but Namine shook her head. "Sorry, it's nothing…. Anyway, we need to find something that will destroy her."

"Damn straight." Iris agreed. "People think she is such an angel it gets on my nerves! She is a scheming bitch who needs to find her place. Personally, I think that place is 6 feet under the ground-."

"OKAY. Iris, I get it." Namine stopped her. "But… you said… that she slept with boys on the Island?"

"You heard that?" Iris asked.

"You were screaming, I woke up…" Iris smiled but let Namine continue. "Why do you think that?"

"Well… I caught her… with my…" Iris trailed off, but stopped. Namine sighed.

"Well, we need to hook her up with someone…" Namine said.

"How about Roxas? He looks like Sora and all…"

"HELL NO!" Namine screamed. Everyone at the restaurant gazed at Namine strangely. "Sorry." She whispered and turned back to Iris. "Axel?"

Iris was angered, strangely, by the suggestion. "Excuse me?"

"Well, he IS a man hoe… He would be the perfect choice." She explained carefully, sensing the brunette's anger. Iris nodded in agreement.

"But.. Er… Let's not use him, please?" She begged.

" Why? Oh, your not falling-." Iris stood, forcing her chair far back. She paid the bill and stormed out of the restaurant. Namine followed after her, giggling insanely.


Sora swallowed. Sweat glistened on his forehead in anticipation. The only thing he had to do was waltz up to Kairi and ask for the glass. But knowing her… she would probably want something in return. He continued to stand in front of her door, thinking over. Maybe there was another way? He shook his head: This was the only way. After standing there for a few minutes he finally worked up the nerve to knock.

The door opened, and Kairi stood in the doorway in her normal attire. "Sora?" She seemed a bit shocked.

"Um.. Yeah… I heard you just bought a glass? From the store down the street?"

"Mm Hm." Kairi nodded and glanced behind him. Riku was leaning against a tree, watching them and Larxene was sitting in a tree branch above glaring at her. Slowly, a idea formed in the tiny brain of hers.

"Um… do you think I could borrow it? I broke my moms and that was the last one.." He continued mumbling.

"Sure… But you have to do something for me."

"What?" Sora asked.

"You have to kiss me." Sora's jaw dropped.

"What? I'm not kissing you! I'm dating Larxene!" Sora began to think that maybe, just maybe, his sister was right for thinking Kairi of a selfish whore along with being a bitch.

"You want that glass… don't you?" Kairi began to lean forward, her lips puckering and nearing his own.

Sora jumped back, repulsed. "Not that badly, I suppose." He turned and began to walk back to Riku and Larxene. He stopped though. Images of his mother screaming at him and possibly kicking Larxene out filled his head. He growled and stomped back. "Fine! Don't turn it to something more!"

Kairi smiled and went back into her house. She returned a second later with the glass his mother so desperately wanted. "Pucker up." She commanded and leaned in. She planted her lips upon Sora's.

Larxene and Riku gaped at the scene. "Oh, that damned scheming whore!" Larxene jumped down from her perch and took out her kunai's. "I'm gonna kill her!"

Riku wrapped his arms around Larxene's waist and held her back. "Calm down! Killing her isn't going to get you anywhere. And besides, Iris would be totally pissed if you did!"

Larxene was in a rage. She continued to play images of killing the auburn hair girl in her head, wanting them to come true badly.

Sora pulled away and held out his hand. Kairi simply smirked and placed the glass in his hand. But before he left, she whispered in his ear: "Oh, come on Sora. We were meant to be…"

Sora glared at her and left towards Larxene and Riku.

"What the hell was that all about?" Larxene screamed at her boyfriend, making him jump back.

"She wouldn't give me the glass unless I let her kiss me." He looked down at the ground. "I'm sorry… But… Mom, who knows what she would've done!" He explained. Larxene stared at him sadly.

"Ok…" She had nothing else to say as Sora embraced her and placed multiple kisses on her lips.


Um... There it is! I have a favor to ask of you all!

MY FRIEND JUST STARTED A NEW FORUM CALLED ICE AND SNOW. I WOULD HIGHLY APPRECIATE IT IF YOU COULD JOIN! I'M A MODERATOR THERE AND WE DON'T ASK MUCH! THEN IF YOU DO JOIN, SPREAD THW WORD! WE'RE TRYING TO GET AS MANY MEMEBERS AS WE CAN!

MY NAME THERE IS MASHIMARO, PM ME IF YOU DO JOIN OR MENTION IT IN YOUR INTRO.! AGAIN: PWEASE JOIN. YOU CAN FIND THE LINK IN MY PROFILE!