Get Over It, Sirius!
Sirius approached his younger brother. "Regulus," He gritted out.
Regulus raised an eyebrow. "Oh, you're talking to me now?"
Sirius ignored him. "Your signature is required here." He jabbed his finger at the parchment in his hand.
Regulus frowned and drew closer to read the sheet. "S.O.D.? Is that supposed to stand for something?"
"It's an abbreviation for 'Save Our Deer', because apparently the population of deer is diminishing in Britain. The cause of this drop in population is due to wizard hunters, who murder deer just to feed the undeserving human beings in this school," Sirius droned impassively.
Regulus blinked. "Were those lines scripted?" He asked.
"All ambassadors of S.O.D. are required to recite that," Sirius stated monotonously.
"Wizard hunters can't be the only cause of the fall in deer population," Regulus said thoughtfully. "I mean, it's probably one of the main causes, but surely there are other factors involved? For instance, changing weather, competition with other deer species-"
"Oh just sign this bloody sheet and take your stupid Galleon!" Sirius burst out.
"…you're a terrible campaigner, you know?"
"I don't give a damn if I'm the worst campaigner in the world," Sirius grouched. "James bullied me into doing this, and since there's no way out, I'm just trying to get it done as fast as possible."
"Alright. I'll sign that sheet," Regulus paused. "But on one condition."
Sirius groaned, "What do you want now?"
"For you to quit sulking," Regulus replied blandly.
"I'm not sulking!" Sirius cried.
Regulus crossed his arms. "Oh yeah? You've been glaring at me ever since we returned from the holidays."
Sirius snorted. "Don't think you're special, I glare at all the Slytherins."
"And you make all those… remarks whenever we pass each other in the hallways," Regulus added.
"What, Mister High and Mighty can't take an insult?" Sirius sneered.
"See, this is exactly what I mean!" Regulus snapped. "Just get over it, will you?"
"I'm not going to 'get over it' because there's nothing to get over," Sirius huffed.
"Well, stop being in denial, then!"
"I'm not in denial!"
"Just because you can't accept that-"
"There's nothing to accept! It's a trick, an illusion!"
"Oh, please. Why would I want to do that?"
"To get back at me for threatening to hang your teddy bear 'Snuffles'!"
"I already did, remember? By giving you a 'haircut' when you were sleeping? And there's no spell to do something like that!"
"Yeah, right. There's a spell to make your nose ten feet long, so I'd bet that there's a spell for that too!"
"You really need to stop being a child about this."
"I'm not being a child about anything! You're the child! And you're supposed to stay a child!"
"I'm supposed to stay a child? If I'm the child, then you're the baby!"
"Me! A baby! Yeah, right! You're the one that wore diapers until you were four!"
"Must you bring that up every single time we have an argument?!"
"What, can't handle the truth, Reggie?"
"You're one to talk about not handling the truth!"
"Lalala! I can't hear you!"
"For Merlin's sake! Why can't you just accept-"
"LALALALALA!"
"-that I'm-"
"ABCDEFGH-REGULUS-IS-A-CRYBABY!"
"-THAT I'M TALLER THAN YOU!" Regulus yelled over Sirius' loud singing.
Sirius gasped, "How dare you say that?! You're not taller than me!"
Regulus rolled his eyes. "I'm one and a half inches taller than you. Just because you didn't notice I got a growth spurt-"
"What growth spurt? There was no growth spurt! You came back and boom! You were suddenly as tall as a bloody giraffe!" Sirius said angrily.
"Hey, it's not my fault if I have the better genes! Or that your 'make Regulus shorter' campaign failed!"
"It didn't fail! It didn't work only because you didn't grow normally! You used some spell or potion to make yourself grow faster!" Sirius yelled.
Regulus scoffed. "You just don't want to admit that your 'campaign' sucked."
"It did not! It was a great plan, but you went and ruined it!"
Regulus let out a noise of aggravation. "How is forcing me to eat 'short people food' a great plan? And just because there's the word 'short' in front of a food like 'short ribs' and 'short beans' does not mean that it makes you short!"
"Yeah well, if it doesn't make you short, then why don't you eat it?"
"Because I don't like it!" Regulus shouted in exasperation.
"Hmph. Yeah, right. You're just trying to cover up the fact that you don't want to be shorter than me."
"Remind me how I'm related to you again?" Regulus sighed.
"Just sign this bloody thing so that we can get back to our lives," Sirius grumbled, practically shoving the parchment in his brother's face.
"Oh fine. And you should know that the younger sibling usually grows taller than their older sibling," Regulus told him.
At Sirius' disbelieving snort, he continued, "Just take a look at our cousins! Narcissa is the tallest among her sisters! Or even other families, like the Prewetts, Bones or Lestranges!"
"Whatever. Here's your Galleon," Sirius snarled as he pulled out a gold coin and snatched back the parchment.
Regulus raised a hand. "Keep it. You might need it to cure your… bruised ego." He finished with a smirk.
"Why you little…" Sirius growled, reaching forwards to grab his brother in a headlock.
Regulus dodged Sirius' outstretched hands and darted towards the other end of the corridor. "Hey, since I'm the taller one, people will probably mistake me for the older one too!" He hollered as a parting shot.
"I hate you!" Sirius yelled as Regulus' laughs drifted down the corridor.
