Phone Messages

//Random Note//- I just watched the previews for Samurai 7 and just had the BIGGEST orgasm ever recorded in the nation's history. It may be something worth watching ;). Anyway, show of hands: who's all going to Otakon this year? (raises hand). And as a final note, I've closed off the fangirl messages. The last thing poor Mustang needs are his ear drums busted due to the immense squealing of fangirls over a phone line. Enjoy!

'Every time a fangirl calls, a part of Mustang's hearing dies.' Remember that.

Roy: "Why hasn't my life ended yet?"

Answering Machine: "You have…6 new messages."

Roy: "On with the show…"

Answering Machine: "First message"(beep): BOMB BOMB BOMBOMB BOMB BOMBOMBOMB BOMB BOMB BOMB! Can you hear it, Roy? Music to my ears!-(deletes message)

Roy: "Was that…WAS THAT KIMBLEY?!"

Answering machine: "Next message" (beep): WHERE ARE ED AND AL?! I WAS SUPPOSED TO MEET WITH THEM, IT'S BEEN THREE WEEKS SINCE THEY'VE BEEN MISSING! WHEN I COME OVER THERE, YOU'RE GETTING A SERIOUS ASS KICKING. YOU-(deletes message)

Roy: "They're still missing? How did I get such a pathetic staff?! How hard can it be to find a giant suit of armor and a pipsqueak?"

Hawkeye: "Harder than you think, sir."

Roy: "Did I ask you?!"

Answering machine: "Next message" (beep): Did it work?? ZOMG, HI ROY-KINS! WE WUV YOU! ('LEMME SPEAK TO HIM!') I WANT YOUR KIDS ROY, YOU'RE SO HOT! ('I WAS THE ONE WHO STOLE YOUR UNDERWEAR!') '...the hell you say that for, idiot?!' (I couldn't help it!) 'Son of a bi-(beep)"

Roy: "Care to explain how this one got through, Hawkeye?"

Hawkeye: "Well, sir, they said they had a call about some 'urgent matter', so I guess it escaped through the Fangirl Filter."

Answering machine: "Next message" (beep): "So, you returned Mr. Fluffikins and Snugglebear. Didn't think you had it in your, alchemist. The tin man and small fry here...(DON'T CALL ME SMALL!)...will be returned in 48 hours. Still, you haven't heard the last of me yet. (beep)

Roy: "Funny how thing just fix themselves like that."

Hawkeye: "Indeed, sir."

Answering machine: "Next message" (beep): MUSTANG, DEAR FELLOW! I'M CALLING FROM THE BEACH! WHAT A WONDERFUL PLACE TO TAKE A VACATION! IT HAS BEEN IN THE ARMSTRONG LINE TO-(deletes message)

Roy: That's it! NO MORE! I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE! (torches answering machine)

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A week later…

(Door knocks.)

Roy: "Yea, what is it?"

(door bursts open)

Armstrong: "ROY! I'M BACK FROM VACATION! BUT I HEARD ABOUT YOUR LITTLE DILEMA, YOUR ANSWERING MACHINE MYSTERIOUSLY GOT TOURCHED AND THROWN OUT OF A FIVE STORY BUILDING. HOW TERRIBLE! LUCKY FOR YOU, I GOT YOU A NEW ONE!"

Roy: "NOOOOOOOO!"

End of Pt. 7? I can't keep track anymore lol