/If you're still reading this... thanks very much :D .\\


He sits with his back against the door of the ruins, letting the stone prop him up. spill.
What?
don't get me wrong, i wouldn't mind it if you stayed like this all the time but you're too quiet and it's starting to make me think you're planning something again.
You've been loud enough for the two of us.
and you're avoiding the question. strike two.
I don't answer to you.
they say as they answer me.
You know, you've got one hell of a smart ass for a skeleton.
i didn't know you'd noticed; it's my best feature.
Sure it is.
it's also where i get my coccyness from.
He actually got a snort for that one. Huh.
Shut it, clown.
well, if you liked that one, you are in for a treat right now.

It's then that Chara noticed where they were. The story from the restaurant that Sans tells Frisk on the better timelines suddenly comes to mind. Toriel. They didn't know how to feel about this at all but Sans is already knocking on the door. Chara waits in tense anticipation.

"Who's there?" Her voice sounded… pleased? Excited?
"boo."
"Boo who?"
"if you're going to cry, i can always leave." Toriel laughs like it's the best thing she's heard in years.
"Don't you dare. I a-door you."
"i know, i'm adoor-able. But i always have the strangest feeling, almost like there's a wall between us. maybe I should be more open." And again, Toriel is howling with laughter. Chara feels something in themselves stir at the sound. They also notice how Sans' soul is almost thrumming with happiness from the first moment.
"Well, I'm sure we can get a handle on the situation."
"i'm sure you wood, but I just keep shutting things out."
Oh god, they just realised what was happening here. Are you seriously using her as a pun-based therapy session?! I can't decide if that's hilarious or just pathetic.
"Sometimes the key thing to remember is that to get to the grain you have to sand off the varnish."
"but what if it's not just an open and shut case?"
Ok, I made up my mind. Definitely pathetic. Especially as most of these are wood puns and you are sat against a stone door. But judging by the way he looks, the fact that his and Toriel's laughing hasn't faltered throughout the exchange, and the feeling coming from him right now, they're not getting through to him. Wait, no, they didn't really just think that did they? Ah, Hell.
"And sometimes a door is not a door. Sometimes it's ajar."
"you crack me up, but I'm also starting to see the framework of your point."
She always did give good advice. Chara thought quietly. Something they hadn't felt since Frisk's LOVE had started warping them stirred in their spirit. They didn't like it. Great. I've got the warm fuzzies, can we GO now?

Nooope, Chara wasn't ruining this for him and Sans continued to ignore them. He does, however, switch it up as Tori's now given him some food for thought. "only because it's blindingly obvious, though."
"It's nice to have someone to appreciate my sharp wit after all."
"careful, you could cut someone with that." They both laugh again, but there's a pause afterwards. He awaits the ineveitable question.
"...Have you seen the human?"
"yeah, they're staying with me and pap while they do their thing." She gasps, sounding surprised.
"Oh! I didn't mean for you to- but what about him wanting to be in the royal guard? Surely, if Asgore finds out, he won't have a chance and I would hate to think that it's-"
He interrupts her, not liking the way her worried tone niggles into her voice. "it was bound to happen. papyrus might think he really wants to capture a human, but he hasn't got a mean bone in his body. apparently it took all of five minutes to get the human to convince him they wanted to date him." They both laugh hard at the idea. "so it's fine, don't worry about it." They move on to exchanging more knock knock jokes now they've both cleared their worries in some respects. He's there for an hour before he hears the distant call of his name from a familiar voice, and it doesn't escape his notice that someone has been unusually quiet either. "oh, crap, pap's calling. gotta go."
"Okay. Oh! And good luck with your set that's coming up." Her voice was still light with laughter.
"i don't need luck, I'm naturally hilarious. In fact, my funny bone is the strongest one in my body - it could lift a skele-ton." But the thanks is in his tone, and he stands, puts his hands in his pockets and walks towards Snowdin leaving the sound of her howling laughter echoing out behind him. He's intercepted by his brother, and Frisk who was walking behind him, at a near run due to the long strides that Papyrus was using.

"FINALLY! GOOD THINKING HUMAN. ALTHOUGH OF COURSE I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS WOULD HAVE THOUGHT TO LOOK HERE AS WELL!" Sans can't help laugh at the quieter "EVENTUALLY."

Sans shrugs an apology. "sounded like you two were busy so i decided to come get some practice."
"WELL, I AM STARTING TO THINK I SHOULD GET YOU A BELL. WE DIDN'T HEAR YOU LEAVE."
"no thanks. that doesn't sound very-"
"SANS, NO."
"-appealing." Sans, yes. He laughs.
"NYEH! THIS IS NO TIME FOR YOUR TERRIBLE PUNS. THE HUMAN AND I WERE VERY WORRIED."
"i've toll-ed you before you worry too much." Papyrus' face drops from the fact he'd managed to set up this many puns. Sans starts leading the way back towards Snowdin, enjoying himself immensely right now, ignoring the eyes on the back of his skull from Frisk. "i just got carried away having a good chime."
"OKAY, NO BELL. NOW PLEASE STOP THE BAD JOKES."
"but what if I want to carillon, though?"
Don't you have an off switch? Jesus. I've just had to sit through an hour and a half of this. If I could strangle you, I would.
A half angry and half exasperated NYEH HEH HEH HEH is the only sound that Papyrus can make in response as he tries to not laugh. you're still there? damn. got my hopes up again.
Bite me.
"we'll do food, then bed. you sound grumpy, pap."
"BECAUSE I HAVE JUST HAD TO COME AND FIND YOU. AGAIN. DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH TIME NOT WORKING I HAVE SPENT TODAY?"
"you were with undyne most of today."
"WELL, YES, BUT-"
"time spent with the boss is time spent working."
"I… AM NOT GOING TO WIN AGAINST WHATEVER BONE IDLE LOGIC YOU HAVE RATTLING AROUND IN THAT SKULL OF YOURS, AM I?"
"nope." He turns to grin at Papyrus. "i'd quit while you're a head, bro."

"SAAAAAAAAANS!" Papyrus lunges, probably trying to rattle him for keeping on with the puns, and he manages to keep just out of reach, half running and half dodging all the way back. By the time they get home, he's panting and sweaty, but it was worth it. Also Pap seems to have stopped worrying, so that's good.

You seem better.
yep. and not even you can rain on my parade, so i wouldn't bother trying.
He flops backward on the couch over the arm, sighing contentedly. The human sits by his head, which was in the middle of the couch due to the way he flopped so his feet could dangle in the air over the arm, and Papyrus heads straight for the kitchen. He hears the fridge open and close, and wonders with his eye sockets closed if the trash tornado can handle another plate of spaghetti in it. Maybe he should empty it soon. He feels the eyes boring into him. "bud, you're gonna burn a hole in my skull soon. tomorrow, okay?"

"...fine." He feels the gaze shift away and sans flips the TV on. The sounds of Mettaton doing his thing fills the lounge quietly.
I'm starting to think you like having me around, this is taking so long.
nope, i figure if i can't kick your ass you can sit and suffer through more of my amazing puns seeing as you hate them so much.
We've pretty much wasted today.
and who's fault is that? wasn't me that decided to waste our time by taking us on a joy ride. wasn't me who decided to make a mess. so you are going to sit there, shut up, listen to pap's bedtime story, and wait for tomorrow like the rest of us.
...Tch, whatever. Not like I have a choice right now.
Sans could feel Chara sulk all the way through him getting Pap sorted for bed - Peek-a-boo bunny tonight after the shower - but paid them no more mind. He could feel them sulk all the way through getting the blankets sorted so Frisk could sleep on the couch, and still ignored them. Once he had showered and changed into his pajamas, then said his goodnights, he shut the door to his bedroom and paused for a minute. He decides to throw them a bone.

consider yourself warned: there's possibly going to be a lot of this tonight.

A lot of wha- Sans stepped through a shortcut, and let the slippers softly echo across the tile as he stepped from carpet to dusty tile. The area was pitch black until Sans used a little magic to put enough pressure on a switch. Lights and machinery hummed to life everywhere around them. If they had been in a body, Chara's pretty sure their eyes would have just fallen out of their socket. Not a lot was new to them by now, but they had never seen anything like this. Even the true lab had nothing on it.

WOAH. Where are we right now?
the magical land of... nunya.
Oh, ha ha. Mature.
They watch as he walks over to a computer terminal, and starts deftly typing, information in strange symbols and graphs appearing over multiple screens. With a practised ease, he walks back and forth across the space, getting whatever things it was he wanted without having to look around the space too hard - even when he used magic to grab things because he was already doing something, it was obvious he'd spent a lot of time here. Rolls with diagrams and more charts, Chara's head started swimming the more they looked at it. And to make it worse, not a bit of it was labelled in a way they could understand. They wouldn't admit it out loud, but they were impressed.

Is this the timeline research? Chara questioned him, completely intrigued.

bits of it is. Sans answers distractedly as he goes swiftly between screen and what looked like a blueprint. i need snacks. Suddenly, they are pulled with him to the vending machine in the true lab, where he grabs a couple of bags of popato chips, then back to in front of the screens. Without looking away from whatever it was he was doing, the left hand lifts and traces a distracted circle, opening a small shortcut, then Chara can distantly hear a fridge open, a rustle of wrappers, then it closing again before he pulled his hand out and lets the magic dissipate. The two new bags were gone and he had an open one in his hand. It gets put next to the keyboard and he eats a chip slowly, deep in thought. It's about two hours later and three bags of chisps later that he suddenly freezes, then stares between one of the diagrams, and about three different screens all at once. What? He was so focused, white pupils rapidly moving between all the information. Sans! What does any of this say? Hey, dumbass! he didn't even appear to hear when Chara started insulting his jokes and throwing out their own terrible puns to try and attract attention to themselves. They were also quickly learning that they hated being ignored.
"oh. OH. hold the fu- did i- hang on. hang on, i haven't got the right information here. at all. well, not all of it." He's definitely talking to himself, and Chara just huffs impatiently still peeved about being ignored. "and if you make me vomit, i'm not gonna be impressed." Chara started to wonder what got him sounding almost giddy, but before the thought had time to even process - let alone the warning - they'd been through way too many 'shortcuts' to some places they recognised in the brief time they were there and some places they didn't, and Sans had a look of fervent excitement on his face as they finally arrived at a long work desk that was back in the starting... lab? His eye sparked blue and a wave of the hand spread things across the large space, folders flipped open without being touched, as he quickly found the information he was looking for, and a fresh roll of blue paper was rolled open. As he started scrawling and marking down things in yet more of the strange symbols, a gleam in his white pupils that was completely different to anything chara had seen on his face yet. Okay, I can't keep up with you. That's my limit, I'm out. They don't know if they were even heard, but they closed themself off to the world around themselves to shut out the strangeness going on around them to try and get whatever semblance of rest their spirit could get. It wasn't long after that, they were swallowed by blackness, whispers, and blue and yellow agony.

Sans was halfway through making notes on a possible breakthrough on his project, when he felt it. The pull of magic that he hadn't summoned then the feeling of it being forcibly channeled through the eye socket once again. no, no, not now. not NOW. But it was too late, and moments later every thought he had and every idea was blasted out of his skull by that all consuming agony. He hit the floor in a ball, the sound of bone hitting hard tile echoing mockingly all around the room, but as no one was here he didn't put any energy into not crying out and succumbed to the primal urge. It was just getting worse, whatever this was. And worst of all, he was going to have to leave for tonight because if he was going to start leaking magic he couldn't afford to get stuck down here not four hours after he'd just been lectured about going missing. He mustered a little bit of soul energy to flip everything off before he used the last reserves of what wasn't leaking out of his body to get himself back to his room. He couldn't focus on the end point correctly, and landed with a crash across the treadmill, bouncing off of it painfully. He groaned, and tried to move before quickly giving up on that plan.

"SAN- OH MY GOD, ARE YOU OKAY?"

"yeah... just... tripped on my way back… from putting chips... back in the fridge…" his brain grasped at the lie feebly. "He he, teach me not to put the light on, huh?" the pain through his soul was easing and he started to come around more, and he noticed that Papyrus has his eye sockets fixed on his ... left eye. Oh, shit. He quickly closed both eye sockets, and tried to stand. He felt Papyrus's hands help him up… then pick him up as his body slumped out on him. The pain was diminishing quickly, but that meant the strain on his magical reserves was also starting to wash him out and he could feel exhaustion crashing on the back of the passing agony.

"BROTHER... YOU HAVE GOT TO TELL ME THESE THINGS." he hears Paps say in quiet exasperation as he yawned and felt his bones turn to a sloppy mush. "WELL, MAYBE AFTER YOU GET A NAP."

His dreams were in the dark again, but this time with the quiet sound of sobbing. He tried to ignore it, but couldn't, and tried to make his way towards it. He hit air like hard stone in every direction. "not yet" and "they're not ready yet" whispered around him like echoes in the field of echo flowers. It sent a shiver up his spine, but the sounds dropped away finally. He slept dreamlessly and for the first time in a while he slept well.