Chapter Eight
The next morning, Frank woke up feeling somewhat refreshed but his mood changed when he saw that the other half of the bed was empty. Perplexed, he scratched his head and got out of bed to shower in the guest bathroom. As the water flowed over him, Frank wondered about his girlfriend and her wellbeing. She seemed happy to be there, a smile always on her face though he noticed that it never reached her eyes. Frank knew Nancy was still hurting not having her father at Christmas but he didn't understand why she couldn't just be happy that they weren't spending the holiday alone in River Heights.
Although the two went to bed together, Frank had a feeling Nancy didn't sleep in the bed with him. His suspicions were confirmed when he went downstairs and saw her snuggled under a blanket on the couch fast asleep. He watched her, his face solemn. There was a feeling that no matter how hard he tried, it seemed like they were floating apart from each other as if in a vast ocean and he couldn't get back to her.
Frank felt a hand on his back and he turned to see his mother smiling at him. "Merry Christmas, sweetheart," Laura whispered.
"Merry Christmas, Mom," he replied softly, turning his gaze back to Nancy. He sighed. "How long has she been down here?"
"All night," she answered. Laura pulled Frank toward the kitchen and he reluctantly went. "Should it matter?" she asked as she placed a mug of coffee in front of him.
"I guess not," Frank shrugged, staring at the dark depths of his coffee. He looked over at the clock on the microwave. It was nine in the morning and his mother was already getting ready for Christmas dinner later on that day. The aroma of homemade cinnamon buns wafted through the kitchen causing Frank's stomach to growl. "Did…did she say anything?"
"Yes…" Laura replied. She sat down across from him, her own mug in her hand. "…and no. I think she just needs a little bit of time, Frank. When she's ready, she'll talk."
"I'm sorry, Mom."
"For what, dear?"
"For bringing our issues with us," he sighed. "We…we wanted to keep it to ourselves..."
"Oh, stop," Laura interrupted. "You weren't going to fool anyone and neither was she. Nancy had a good cry last night. She needed it and your father and I were there. You have to remember that she doesn't have the family support like you do."
"She has Hannah," Frank replied. "She has me, too."
"Yes, she does," she continued. "Hannah has been in her life longer than we have but she can be a little bit overbearing at times."
"I can see that," he agreed, laughing.
"As for you, Frank, well, you're not a parent." Laura gave him a knowing look. "At least not yet."
"Wait, she told you?" Frank asked, slightly annoyed.
"This again," Laura scoffed, rolling her eyes. Frank's expression changed to confusion. "She didn't 'tell' me. I figured it out on my own. Geez, the two of you need to get over yourselves and talk. I don't care if you do it today or next month, just talk! That's one of the foundations in every strong relationship: communication. If you can't communicate with each other, you're doomed. Now, I'm done lecturing you. You want a cinnamon bun before your brother gets here and eat them all?"
"Of course," Frank smiled, licking his lips. "When are they getting here, anyway?"
"In about an hour," his mother replied. She handed Frank a large cinnamon bun and fork. Laura set aside another one, explaining that it was for Nancy when she got up. "Speaking of which, will you take her upstairs so no one will bother her. We don't need Joe drama to go with it. I'm sure some time today, he's going to grill you about everything, anyway."
"Really?" he asked, surprised. "How do you know?"
"Vanessa called this morning asking if I needed anything else for dinner," Laura explained in between bites of her own cinnamon bun. "She gave me a head's up about Joe's suspicions about you and Nancy. You know how he is when something's up. He'll be determined to find out before you leave."
"I'm sure he will."
"Just be nice and tell him as much as you want," she suggested. She watched as he finished off the cinnamon bun, though Laura could tell where his thoughts were at the moment. "She loves you so much, Frank."
He looked at his mother, a sad smile on his face. "Sometimes I wonder about that, Mom," Frank said softly. He looked down at his hands. "I love her but she makes me so…frustrated sometimes."
"I have a feeling, Frank," she smiled, taking his plate, "that things are going to be a little different for you. Just wait." Laura looked at the clock. "I suggest you get moving before your brother gets here."
"Shouldn't we wake her though?" he asked as he rose from his chair.
"Let her sleep, dear," Laura said, patting Frank's arm. She guided him back to the living room, stopping just outside. Lowering her voice, Laura continued, "I don't think Nancy's been sleeping well lately. It comes with the territory with everything going on. She'll wake when she's ready."
She left Frank, going back into the kitchen. He stepped forward, fearful that he would wake Nancy. Frank took the blanket off that was only now draped over her. He scooped her up into his arm, Nancy never waking. She only shifted slightly, her head leaning on his shoulder and soft sigh exiting her lips. Frank slowly ascended the stairs, careful not to knock into something. Fenton came out of his bedroom just as the pair silently passed. He smiled at his son before starting down the stairs.
Gently laying Nancy on the bed, Frank covered her up with the comforter. He was about to back away when he noticed two watery blue eyes staring at him from the bed. The two stared at each other for a few seconds before Nancy spoke so softly that Frank almost didn't hear her. "I'm sorry, Frank."
He knelt down beside the bed and looked into her eyes again. Frank could see a difference in her, almost as if a heavy weight had been lifted. Nancy cupped his face in her hands and smiled. "I don't expect you to forgive me," she continued when he didn't say anything. "I want to tell you so much but I don't know where to start."
"Shh," he whispered, smiling back at her. "You need to rest now and we can talk all you want later." He reluctantly stood up and began to leave.
"Stay with me," she pleaded. "Please."
Frank looked down at her then nodded. He silently went over to shut the door to their room and came back to the bed to lie down beside her. Nancy turned over, snuggling into his arms.
"Frank?"
"Yeah?"
Nancy looked up at him, tears forming in her eyes. "Do you regret coming to live me?"
Frank looked at her, thinking about the unexpected question. There were times that he felt that way but recently he felt more at ease ever since his first case the month before. It just took him by surprise that she would ask. Frank sighed, pulling her closer. "There was a time when I did," he said honestly. He felt her stiffen in his arms. "But now, I don't regret it one bit. I love you too much to give up on us."
Nancy sniffled. "I've been so awful to you," she admitted. "And to Hannah. Half the time I don't know what comes over me when I act that way. Everything that we've been through goes through my mind all the time. I've changed over the past year and I worry that you…you won't want me anymore because of it."
"Why would you say that?" Frank asked, pushing her away slightly to be able to look at her. "Why would you even think that?"
"I killed Dixon," she sobbed. "Point blank shot him. He was a monster and all I could think about was him harming any of you."
"It was self-defense, Nancy," he said. "I would have done the same thing if in that situation. You really had no choice. He was going to kill you. He was going to kill us all. You saved us. To this day, I don't think Dad even knows how you pulled that trigger. All that matters is the fact that we are still here."
"But Dad was my fault too," Nancy sobbed again. "Ned was my fault. His death was my fault. You all being in danger was my fault!"
"How was all that your fault?" Frank asked incredulously. He held her tightly, feeling her body tremble in his arms. "Treyford was after all three of us. He wanted to get back at you, me, and Joe for putting him in jail. That's not your fault. Dixon killed your dad on Treyford's orders. That was not your fault. Ned's jealousy was why he was the way he was. That wasn't because of you. That was him. You can't control what other people do, Nancy. And you definitely shouldn't take the blame for their actions. They chose their path and there's really nothing more that you could have done to stop it. If I could turn back time to change anything, I would just to make sure you don't have to suffer any more."
Nancy continued to sob as the two lay together silently. Frank's words spoke truth. All she had to do was believe them. He stroked her hair as she finally calmed down a little. "I have to be honest with you, Nancy," Frank finally said. She suddenly got quiet, her eyes shimmering with fear that he would say something that would break her heart. "That night on the cliff with Ned, I tried my hardest to not kill him. I wanted to see him suffer in jail more than anything. Then when you came in and Ned had you, I knew there was really no other choice. He was never going to stop and he would be haunting us as long as he lived. When the moon came back out, it revealed to me what I needed to do. It was almost as if someone was showing me the only way to get out of the situation we were in. I knew there was a chance that both of us would die too but it was the only way to stop Ned from hurting you anymore. You say that killing him was your fault but I beg to differ. It was mine just as much as yours. I pushed us all over that cliff edge. He died because of my decision not just because you kicked him to let go. We both did it."
Nancy looked up at him, realizing that Frank was hurting just as much as she was. It was weighing on his heart too. Neither one of them had ever told anyone about what really happened on that cliff in Colorado. Not the FBI. Not their family. Nancy began to think that maybe the only way for the two of them to really start healing was to tell the truth, even if it meant implicating themselves. Ned needed to be stopped and because of their actions, their lives and relationship had changed.
Frank held her closer, his heart pounding. It had taken him months to finally let that go, same as Nancy. His mother was right. They needed to talk. Their relationship and future depended on it. They had a baby on the way and the last thing Frank wanted was Nancy raising it alone. They silently laid there together, neither one of them speaking for several minutes as they thought about what they revealed to each other.
"Frank?" Nancy finally said, breaking the silence.
"Hmm?"
"Did you really get mauled by a feral cat?"
"Who told you that?" he asked, his face turning red. Frank saw the mischief in Nancy's eyes, the smirk on her face.
"Your mom," she laughed. He laughed with her. "You could have said something."
"I know," he shook his head, embarrassed. "I was just…disappointed, I guess. Besides, cats and I do not get along."
"To be honest, I hate cats," Nancy laughed again. "But I've been helping Mrs. Stein for years now. She did pay us though. Rather generously, I might add."
"She did?" Frank was surprised. "Mrs. Barry did too. Well, maybe not as generous as Mrs. Stein but she was quite embarrassed when I told her the story." He went on to explain the whole case between Mr. and Mrs. Barry. "I saw how much he loved his wife and realized how much you mean to me."
"I never really knew you could learn to dance like that," Nancy said thoughtfully. She pondered Googling it when she got the chance.
"I don't think it exists but Savannah was able to figure it out somehow," Frank shrugged. "Still, I'm grateful that I was able to help that couple because it helped me as well. I don't want to let us go, to let you go."
Nancy stared at him, seeing the genuine truth of his love for her. It made her regret all the nasty things she said to him. Nancy tilted her head towards Frank and kissed him, taking him by surprise. He pulled her close, his hands resting on the small of her back. When they finally pulled away, Frank stared down at his girlfriend, her hair shimmering in the morning light. He felt so lucky to have her though somewhat regretting the decision to stay at his parents' house. Resting his hand on her belly, Frank almost wished he could feel a kick. Her smile slightly faded, a tear forming in the corner of her eye.
"Hey, hey," he said softly. He wiped her eye with his thumb. "What's wrong?"
"I…I'm still not sure," she whispered.
"Not sure about what?"
"If I'm ready."
"Neither am I, Nancy." She was surprised at his revelation. "I wanted some more time with you. Just the two of us. But I think if we can handle bad guys and being shot at, I think we can handle a little baby. Besides, no matter how hard this is to say, Joe really is a good dad."
Nancy laughed, agreeing with him. "You're right. If he can do it, we can do it," she replied. Her face turned serious again. "But I don't think I'm ready to say anything to anyone just yet."
"Then we won't say anything," he nodded in agreement. Frank smiled at her. The two leaned in, kissing again though it was more passionately this time.
"It's too bad we're not at a hotel right now," Nancy said breathlessly seconds later. She gazed into his deep brown eyes.
"You know," Frank laughed, smirking. He softly kissed her neck. "I was thinking the same thing."
They looked at each other and laughed. "What were we thinking?" they both said together.
"I think we should thank your mom though for forcing us to stay here," Nancy smiled.
"Why?"
"If it hadn't been for her or your dad, we wouldn't be here talking."
Frank thought about it and nodded. "You're right," he agreed. "We needed to talk. Even Hannah couldn't get us to do it but Mom somehow did."
Nancy frowned. "I need to apologize to Hannah when we get back though. She tried to help but I didn't want to listen."
"It's okay, Nan," Frank replied, seeing her eyes tear up again. "We'll deal with it together, just like we'll deal with the baby and anything else. We are in this together."
Nancy calmed down again, blinking slowly. He could see that she was starting to fade.
"I should get back downstairs," Frank said slightly saddened. He shifted his arm out from under her. "You need some rest."
"I know," Nancy huffed, she kissed him again then sighed. "I'll be glad when we're finally alone."
"Yeah, we can't win can we?" He looked at the alarm clock, surprised that it was after eleven. They could smell the Christmas meal cooking below, the sounds of laughter coming through as well. "Sounds like Joe and Vanessa are here."
A sudden crash came from downstairs and they could hear Laura yelling. "Yup," Nancy laughed, closing her eyes. She yawned, snuggling deeper into the pillow. "Joe's definitely here. You go on, Frank. Be with your family. I'll be fine. Just a little tired."
"Nancy, you are my family," he replied. Frank stopped when he realized she was breathing deeply, her face peaceful as she had already fallen asleep. After he got off the bed, he covered Nancy with the comforter once again before going into the bathroom. Staring at himself in the mirror, he wondered what it was going to be like to be a father. He knew he couldn't ask his own father or brother just yet since he agreed not to say anything about the baby just yet. The one thing he worried about the most was keeping the baby safe but he knew his family would be there for him no matter what.
Frank left the bathroom and looked at Nancy as she slept. Her hair had fallen onto her face, her breaths moving the strands as she breathed. In that moment he realized he wouldn't change anything as to what happened between them. It was just a stepping stone for them to become stronger than they had ever been before and they were going to be a great family together.
Author's Note:
Oh, cool! Another update from yours truly in the same week! Well, I knew that if I didn't get it out today, it wouldn't be going out till at least tomorrow night or even into the weekend with everything going on in the coming days (street fair, movies, cleaning, Hersheypark, oh my!) Thanks to everyone who left a review for the last chapter! I appreciated all your kind words and thoughts for the story! I hope that this one gave you some insight as to what was going on in both Nancy's and Frank's minds. Well, I must be going for now. I hope that you enjoyed the chapter and please don't forget to leave your mark so that I know you were here! Until next time, have a great rest of your week and into the weekend! God bless!
