Sam knocked lightly on the door of room 610 with the knuckles of one hand. "Alex?" He called softly. "You still there?"
He waited quietly for a moment, ear against the door. In his other hand, he held a small dish with a cheeseburger and a pickle, as well as a small pile of chips. When there was no answer, he knocked again.
"Hey. Can I come in? I've got food..."
Still no reply. Carefully, Sam jiggled the handle. But the door was barricaded from the other side. The Winchester sighed heavily, his face a complicated expression of contemplation as he considered the worn old door. He knocked once more, a little louder. Beyond the wood, he thought he heard the shuffling of sheets and the creak of the bed.
"...I'm going to leave this out here for you." He told her softly. Slowly he crouched down, picking up a plate with a grilled cheese and tomato soup that had long since gone cold and replacing it with the fresh burger. He looked down at the uneaten, abandoned food, then back at the door. "..." He opened his mouth to say more but then simply closed it. Turning, he walked back down the hallway.
When he got back to the library, Dean looked up from his book, legs propped up on the table. "Any luck?" He asked, his tone both hopeful and stale.
Sam dropped the plate with the grilled cheese on the table in answer, pulling out a chair and sitting down with a huff. "I don't know what else to try."
Dean considered the cold sandwich. "I say we break the door down." he replied with a shrug, reaching out and plucking up the grilled cheese.
"If she wanted to see us, she would not have blocked the door." Castiel pointed out, wandering back over to the table with a few files in his hands. Placing them on the table amid the mess of others, he looked at the brothers.
Dean waved his hand at the angel. "No one really ever wants to see us. But she's been locked in there almost a whole day now." He tossed the book in his hands aside and swung his feet back to the floor. "She's stewing. And you shouldn't let people stew. They get all kinds of messy bad ideas in their heads."
"Well, can you blame her?" Sam scoffed "She basically just confirmed her worst nightmare; all the dreams and plans she had can never happen." He rubbed one big hand through his long, dark copper hair. "Imagine being told you only have one option for how to live your life. No ifs, ands, or buts."
Dean took a massive bite out of the sandwich. "Fine." He growled around his mouthful. "We'll give her a few more hours. Then we'll bust down the door... Or she'll come out to pee." He smirked "She can't hold it in forever."
Sam shook his head at his brother, rolling his eyes.
…... …... …...
Her finger hovered over the send button, red-rimmed eyes quivering as she re-read the email to her parents for the hundredth time. On the worn, cracked screen of the iPod, the tiny paragraph seemed huge. But she knew if she did send it, it would leave more questions than answers.
Sighing, she tossed the iPod away, and dropped her face back into the scratchy sheets, pulling the covers over her head. Again she debated going out and talking to the boys. Seeing if they had found anything. Though she knew if they had they would have told her. Anything to get her out of the room.
Her whole body felt heavy, as if her bones had turned to solid lead. Ever since they had returned to the bunker the previous day, she hadn't left the tiny little closet sized bedroom. She just... didn't feel like it. Didn't feel like seeing anyone. Didn't feel like talking. She just wanted to be alone. A tiny part of her felt bad, especially the few times Sam had come knocking with food. And the one time Castiel had come, asking her if there was anything he could do. But there was nothing any of them could do. And the guilt she felt was never enough to make her drag her weighted body out of the bed. Part of her never wanted to leave it again.
"What's the matter love, witches got you down?" came a cool, smoky voice that had become irritatingly familiar.
"Go away Crowley." She grumbled from under her sheets. For added measure, she pulled a pillow from the top of the bed and squished it over her head. So much for being alone.
"And let you wallow in self pity?" Came the reply "Seems like what you need is a cheer-me-up."
She heard the soft snap of his fingers, and then the sound of gulls and crashing waves reached her ears. Surprised, she peeked out from under the nest she had made herself. The smell of salt filled her nose, and she had to blink a few times at the bright light that flooded her vision. A breeze tickled at her cheeks and as her eyes adjusted, tall, honey-colored grass filled her view. Slowly she sat up, curiosity mingling with her surprise. The heavy comforter lingered about her shoulders as she swung her legs over the side of the bed. Less than a dozen yards away the swaying grasses gave way to open air; a cliff overhanging an enchanting ocean bay. Dazed by the sight, she felt the blanket fall away from her as she slowly slipped her bare feet to the soft ground. The long grass reached up to her waist, and slowly she waded through it, closer to the edge. As she moved, the stalks slowly became shorter and shorter, until they gave way to strands hardly taller than her knees. She stopped a few paces from the edge of the cliff, and a gust of wind swept up behind her, catching her long hair and whipping it past her face. A sapphire and emerald ocean stretched before her, with a few villas dotting the adjoining cliffs, and a rocky beach sweeping below, waves crashing rhythmically against it.
"Where are we?" She asked softly, hardly able to soak in the natural beauty of the place.
"France." Stated Crowley simply, who had quietly shadowed her as she took in the view. "On the island of Corsica." He slowly moved to stand beside her, hands in the pockets of his dress coat. He glanced quickly over the horizon before looking back over at his companion. "You mentioned you preferred the outdoors."
"Yeah..." she breathed, still awestruck. It was hard to believe how her heavy bones had felt just a few moments before. At that moment, had Crowley said she could fly, she would've believed him.
She glanced back over her shoulder, almost laughing at how completely out of place the full-sized bed with dark grey sheets appeared amid the swaying amber grasses. Then again, the pair of them probably looked a bit ridiculous too. Her in loose black capris and a blue tank top, him in a black suit with a soft grey and red tie and long dress coat. She looked over at him and found his grey-green eyes watching her.
"What?" she asked, suddenly a bit self conscious, dropping her eyes down. She crossed her hands about herself, rubbing her arms. Although the sun was warm, the cool ocean breeze was certainly chilling.
"Just wondering if I had failed to impress." He commented, drawing off his outer layer. He moved to stand even closer and draped his coat across her shoulders.
She snorted, stiffening first at his gesture, but then grateful for the sudden warmth of the cloth against her bare shoulders. She begrudgingly took it, gripping the edges tightly in an effort to ward off the worst of the chill.
"Thank you." She mumbled, shuffling nervously a bit. The smell of him surrounded her with the fabric; smoke, whiskey, another scent she couldn't place. She sighed. "I am impressed." She relinquished finally, looking back out over the magnificent scene. "It's like a dream..." She watched him out of the corner of her eyes while pretending not to notice him.
"Yes, you are." He returned. She could see him staring at her.
She scoffed. "Wow. Did you rehearse that one?"
"All night." He returned, amused. She felt his hand skimming her lower back, inching him closer to her. "I wanted to be sure to get it... Just... Right..." By the end of his drawn out sentence, his lips were next to her ear, and one hand rested on each of her hips.
She felt her breath catch in her throat. "I...I think you should–"
"Shhhhh" He silenced her, slowly wrapping his arms more tightly about her, "Let me just have this moment." He was so close, she could feel the scruff on his chin and cheek tickling her neck.
Alex felt her jaw clench. "Crowley–"
"Why do you fight me so persistently?" He interrupted, purring in her ear. His voice sent shivers down her spine. "Why don't I deserve your affections?"
"I have no affections to give." She replied, half-heartedly trying to pull away from his grasp. He tightened his grip ever so slightly, keeping her trapped in his arms.
"It has nothing to do with me being a demon... does it?" He teased, trailing his lips just above her neck. The sensation of his breath on her skin scattered goosebumps on her arms. "Because I find that racist."
"You're using me." She mumbled dryly. "You would just as soon kill me as help me. Whatever is to your best advantage." She struggled against him in vain once more "For all your honeyed words and sweet gestures, you are a cold, emotionless monster."
He froze at her words, and for a second she thought she could feel the heat of his anger permeating through him. She swallowed nervously.
"What makes you think I'm a monster?" he asked in an unnaturally calm voice.
She suppressed a shiver. "... You're the King of Hell. I doubt you got that title with good deeds and charitable acts."
He chuckled softly, and she could feel it in his chest against her back. "Or perhaps I used my wit..." he traced one hand over her's holding the coat. "... and charm."
She swallowed nervously again. "You said you wouldn't lie to me." She reminded him "The whole truth, no beating around the bush. That's what you said."
He was silent for a moment, and the wind quietly swallowed them, casting their shadows into the sun and playing with their breath. She felt her heart racing like a bird was trapped in her breast. It seemed so loud, she was sure he could hear it, even over the crashing waves.
"I have done numerous things that would warrant the title of monster." He admitted "Though its worth noting the Winchesters and their precious angel have done a lot of horrifying things themselves... not nearly as many as I of course." He added softly, and in her chest she felt a pang as though a string with an anchor had been dropped from her heart into the pit of her stomach. "But does that make me any less deserving of love?"
She gritted her teeth. "You still want me to love you?"
He smiled, she could hear it in the movement of the air through his nose. "Everyone wants to be loved."
The human shook her head in disbelief. "I can't even say the word without a mocking undertone."
"That says more about you than me." Crowley said, dropping his hands and stepping around to stand before her. "And I've learned a lot about you, in this short time we've known each other." He reached out and tucked her hair behind her ear. "You are stubborn, but grateful." His hand lingered on her face, warm and coarse. "You are young, but wise." His thumb traced her cheek. "You are passionate, but reserved." He stepped closer, carefully holding her gaze. "You believe in everyone and everything except yourself." As he stared at her, she felt her heart begin to race even more.
For a long time, neither said anything. He just stared into her eyes, and she forced herself to hold his gaze, unwavering. Growing more determined with each passing moment.
"There you are, darling." He murmured finally.
He leaned forward, and for a moment she thought he was going to kiss her. But then he dropped his hand and stepped away.
"I have another gift for you." He told her, turning back towards the ocean view.
She frowned, following his gaze. Gulls danced and swooped on the breeze, and soft, puffy clouds drifted across the sky.
"You said you wanted your family to be safe." Crowley reminded her. Her head jerked as she looked at him, startled. He didn't turn to face her again just yet, continuing to stare out across the horizon. "I want you to know I have placed them under my protection. I have demons watching and guarding them 24/7. Ones loyal only to me."
She wasn't sure if the notion of demons watching and guarding her family made her feel better. And she could almost hear the threatening undertone of his gift. They were safe. As long as he wanted them to be. Her lips tightened, and she felt the weighty despair clawing at her heart once more.
"Are they?"
"Are they what, love?" He looked over at her.
"...Safe?"
He nodded. "Very much so. Simply going about their daily lives."
She pulled his coat tighter about her, more from an internalized chill than the actual temperature. "Do they know?" She glanced over at him before dropping her eyes to the ground. "About all this? About where I am?"
"No." He assured her "And It's probably better if we keep it that way. The less they know about you, the less others will target them to find you."
"So where do they think I am?"
"On an impromptu vacation." He explained with a smug look. "With some work friends they've never met. Out of reach by phone and most internet services." He checked his nails "And your work thinks you've quit. What with you being AWOL and all."
She nodded slowly. "...Thank you." She murmured softly.
"Aw love, don't be so morose." He purred, cocky arrogance quickly returning. "It really doesn't suit you."
She gritted her teeth again, her lips pursing. Together, demon and mortal stood, gazing out across the ocean, wind whipping about their hair and ankles. She wasn't sure how long they stood there, her clutching his coat about her, him standing stoically with an unreadable expression upon his face. At that moment, time seemed endless. But finally, she tore her gaze from the beautiful sights and looked back at the bed.
"I should get back." She mustered up, glancing sidelong at the King of Hell.
He reached one hand up, stroking his chin. "As you wish."
With a snap, they were back in the tiny room, the colors seeming even more washed out after the vibrant hues of the French countryside. Alex pulled the long dress coat off her shoulders and held it out to Crowley.
"Even if it was entirely selfish and was merely a manipulative attempt to make me like you more so I'll do what you want... thanks." She told him as he gingerly took back the coat. "It did make me feel a bit better."
He smirked, folding the coat over one arm. "Any time, love. I am at your beck and call."
"Until a better offer comes along." She scoffed.
His smirk widened. "We shall see." And with that and another snap of his fingers, he was gone again.
Alex sighed and looked around the room. The small desk, pushed up against the door, caught her eye. She bit her lip, steeled her will, and slowly pushed the desk back to its originally position. Then she returned to the door, gradually pulling it open. It creaked quietly, and she poked her head out into the hallway. One of the lights flickered, the faint sound of crackling electricity the only sound to be heard. Looking down, Alex saw the plate of food Sam had left. A small, sad smile pulled at her lips, and she bent downing, picking up the dish.
Not long after, she walked barefoot down the hallway with the mostly empty plate. Just the pickle, a few little chip crumbs, and the last few bites of burger left. She shuffled nervously in the entryway to the library, looking at the trio. The three men who were working so hard to try to help her, try to find a way to stop her destiny. They were still trying, she realized with a pang of guilt, looking over the piles of books and papers all over the library. She stood there silently for a moment or two before Castiel looked over as if sensing her presence.
"Alexandra." He breathed, and the brothers turned as one to look at her. Surprise was reflected on all their faces, though it quickly gave way to relief.
"I..." She hesitated, stepping into the room a little further. She looked down at the plate guiltily. "I'm...sorry... for being such a child..."
"You weren't being a child." Sam reassured her. "You …..you got some tough information, and just needed some time alone... to think about it."
"And I did!" She exclaimed, walking slowly over to the table and putting down the plate. "I thought about it a lot. So much that my head hurts... but locking you guys out... that wasn't fair...there were better ways to deal with that and...I mean... after all you've done for me..." she dropped off.
Dean waved his hand and gave a small smile. "Don't worry about it, Blondie." He consoled her "You should see some of the crap we've pulled when we got some tough news."
Sam nodded his agreement, and Alex looked around at the three of them. She wrung her hands, unsure what to say next.
"I am glad you decided to come out of your own free will." Castiel put in. "We were discussing the possibilty of breaking down your door."
Her eyebrows shot up. "Breaking... breaking down the door?" She looked over at the Winchesters "That seems a bit dramatic."
Dean opened and closed his mouth a few times, gesturing with one hand and stammering a few syllables.
"Well, Dean also mentioned you wouldn't be able to 'hold it in forever'." The angel added "In reference to your need to urinate. And I believe it would be considered indecent to relieve yourself in your –"
"OK! Cas!" Dean hastily stood, silencing the angel. "That's enough out of you."
Sam laughed, standing and walking over to the girl. "We're really happy you decided to join us." He told her "And we are here for you. Whatever you need. Whether thats a roof over your head, someone to talk to, help looking for answers –"
"Or some big guns and muscles to kick some ass," Dean interjected "We're your guys."
"I don't understand why you guys are being so nice to me," Alex began, a small smile forming on her lips "But I really do appreciate it. Thank you."
"Because, like I told you before, we like you." Dean replied. "You're a good person, just fallen on some shitty luck."
"Still... thank you." She repeated.
"Anytime." Sam replied, reaching out and squeezing her shoulder gently.
Castiel wandered closer. "Do you know what it is you wish to do next?" he asked, his deep voice layered with curiosity. The boys looked like they wanted to ask the same question.
Alexandra sighed, running one hand through her long blonde hair. "I'm …. not sure..." She admitted softly. "Part of me says give up, just figure out the next step in this whole God baby thing. Another part says keep looking for a way to stop it... but..." She shrugged tiredly "If I keep putting it off, I'm not sure how much control I'll get to have over it... you know?"
"You're worried if you avoid your destiny for too long looking for a way stop it, you'll miss your chance to actually have a say in how it happens or with who if you don't find a solution in time." Sam concluded. Alex nodded and Dean shifted uncomfortably.
"Yes, that seems a very reasonable fear." Castiel nodded along "When your soul begins to resonate, it will most likely affect your own reasoning and cognitive skills as well as those of potential candidates, pushing you closer to your destiny in a much faster and more direct route."
"...Right...Great... you see my dilemma."
Dean shrugged. "So, what? Keep looking for a solution, but take up speed dating too?"
"Good grief." Alex groaned "Dating is hard enough, without spending the whole time wondering if a guy would make a good father to the new God." She sighed "If only there was a way to narrow down the candidates- Oh fucking hell I can't believe I'm even talking about this."
"Well, I think we should rule out your average joe off the street." Dean offered, smirking. "Can't imagine too many of them would be up to the job."
"So who does that leave? (and please someone stop me this is insane)"
Sam shrugged, shifting his weight from one leg to the other. "I'm not sure. Angels? Demons? Hunters, I guess?"
Alex stared at him. "...So basically, Castiel, …..Crowley, ….and you guys?"
"Nono no nono no-" Sam was stuttering before she had even finished talking.
"Nope no nonono Hell no-" Dean.
"I would be honored to be considered-"
"Cas, shut up!"
Sam raised his hands. "I wasn't suggesting us," he clarified "I was just listing potential beings that could be the father, that already know about this world."
"And no demons." Dean declared firmly. "Especially not that arrogant douche-wad."
"Seems like it would be a lot to put on a mortal human... even a hunter..." She sighed.
"Doesn't leave much else except-"
Suddenly Dean was cut off by his phone buzzing and ringing in his pocket. He pulled it out, quickly checking the caller ID. His face became deadly serious and he glanced at Sam as he hit 'answer' and held the phone up to his ear.
"Jody Mills." He said into the receiver, and Sam straightened nervously at the name. "Everything alright?"
The group stayed silent for a moment as the woman on the other end spoke. Alex looked around at the men as she tried to piece together who this 'Jody' was.
"What?... seriously?...Uh-huh...Yeah, no, definitely sounds like our kinda thing... Alright." Dean continued. "No problem, Jody... No no, stay right there. We're on our way." He glanced at his brother "Yeah...ok... See you soon."
"Is she ok?" Sam was asking before he had even fully dropped the phone from his ear.
"Right now, yeah." Dean replied. "But apparently Souix Falls has turned into a desert."
"A... a desert? Like-"
"Like a full-blown sand storms, sweltering temperatures, waters drying up kinda desert." Dean replied. "All in about a week."
"...Does that happen a lot?" Alex asked. "And who's Jody?"
"Surprisingly more often than you'd think." Dean smirked "Jody Mills is the sheriff of Souix Falls, South Dakota. She's kind of a part-time hunter. We've hooked up to take down a few nasties a couple times."
"This sounds like the work of an old religion god." Castiel noted. "We should be able to-"
Dean raised a hand. "No we. Just me and Sam on this one, Cas. If it is a pagan god or a freak dry spell, we can handle it." He looked over at Alex. "You two are staying behind this time. For real."
Castiel followed Dean's gaze, a hardened expression filling his features. Alex nodded pensively. "Ok, whatever you say." She relented, raising her hands a little in the most surrendering manner she could manage. "I don't want to cause any more trouble... but what's that about old gods?" She looked over at Sam "Are there multiple gods?"
"Not technically, no." Sam began, reaching for his coat off the back of his chair. "There is only one God, who created the universe as we know it. But a lot of those ancient pagan gods existed too. In reality, they were powerful monsters and creatures who found their way into human religion and lore. Some thrived off the worship, some needed the rituals to survive."
"And of the ones left, most of them are having a hard time letting go of their former glory." Dean explained, grabbing the pickle off the mostly empty plate.
"We'll deal with this as quick as we can and be back." Sam told her, reaching out to squeeze her shoulder again. "Until then, keep looking for answers. Maybe you and Cas can come up with a way to find the right guy or something new to try."
"And be on standby." Dean added, smacking Cas's shoulder lightly with the back of his hand. "If we need intel on this hunt, we're gonna be calling you."
Castiel nodded. "If it becomes too difficult for you to manage on your own-"
"We'll call you." Sam reassured him, as Dean's mouth was too full of pickle to answer.
"Though a quick lift to Souix Falls might be nice." Dean put in after he swallowed his mouthful.
Castiel nodded again. "I shall come with you to the car then."
The brothers grabbed things as they moved towards the exit. Hardly ten minutes passed between Dean's conversation with Jody and the door slamming behind Castiel as he returned from the driveway.
"They seem to really be used to just...running off at a moment's notice..." Alex noted, her eyes lingering on the door.
"Yes. They have grown accustomed to a life on the road. It was only recently that they set up a more permanent residence here." Castiel told her, looking over the books spread out before him as he rather pointedly avoided her gaze.
"...I'm sorry... again... for, you know..." She mumbled. "I know you probably don't trust me anymore...but for what its worth I swear I'll never try to trick you again..."
The angel didn't say anything for a moment, resting his fingertips lightly on the table while his face furrowed into a frown. Then, he sighed heavily, looking back up at her.
"Despite your recent behavior...I find it hard to remain wary or angry at you." He told her haltingly, his deep, stormy blue eyes meeting her pale sky blues. "I am...not sure why. Perhaps because in the short time we have known each other, I have grown fond of you."
A smile formed on her lips, lighting up her sorrowful face. "Castiel, you are too good to be true."
He frowned. "I am not sure how one can be-"
"Its an expression." She interrupted quickly, laughing a little. "It means you are unbelievable, in the most positive way possible. That you are so good its hard to believe you are real."
She thought she saw his cheeks color a little, and he looked away from her, clearing his throat. "Well, I assure you, I am very real."
She looked down at the table. "I know..." they fell into silence for a few minutes, neither looking at the other. Alex casually brushed her hands over the files on the table. "So what would you like to do next?" She asked softly.
The angel shuffled uncomfortably, clearing his throat again. "Perhaps we should try to come up with a list of potential candidates... or see if there is some sort of method to determine what kind of father any potential males would be."
"Right...sounds like something." She agreed "Where do we start?"
