Helga took another bite of her delicious pastrami sandwich and looked over Angela's file, or rather the mess of scribbled notes that was supposed to resemble an organised file, and once again found herself literally glaring at it. More specifically, glaring at the sole word that was written beside today's agenda, that being Dean. Honestly, she had been spending the better part of her lunch break trying to figure out why she was glaring at the word.
Firstly she had assumed it was because it was the only thing on the page, and that maybe she expected to have more things to write. But, really, he alone was enough to fill up weeks of session agendas, so it couldn't have been that. Secondly, she wondered whether it was because she honestly didn't want to initiate the subject, nor endure the horrible nostalgic sensation as Angela Sanderson burst into a dramatic tale of her burning love and endless adoration for the boy. Or, maybe, it was because at the current moment she almost felt angry with Dean, just like she had always almost felt angry at Arnold, for just simply not realising.
However, before she could ponder her frustration any further, her desk phone began to buzz in its horribly annoying, and entirely cliché, little way and Tina, Helga and Dr Bliss' secretary, began to speak.
"Phoebe called for you." Tina said pleasantly, which was nothing out of the ordinary considering she was the loveliest, bubbliest, most excitable thing on this side of the hemisphere, "She's on line one."
Despite sounding like the type of person who might irritate Helga to the point of madness, Tina was actually somebody Helga thoroughly liked, and surprisingly she didn't even mind her sing-song tone. Possibly that was because Tina was not only happy on the outside, but also on the inside, meaning she was actually mentally sound and her happiness was not a thinly veiled front for a basket of overwhelmingly depressing personal issues. And that kind of happiness, the basket-case, personal issues kind, was something Helga had experienced far too much of in her life. It was nice to have somebody around who actually had their shit together.
"Thanks Tina." she hummed appreciatively down the phone, with a slight mumble considering that she had just previously taken a large bite of her sandwich, and when she heard the receiver click, and was certain Tina was no longer there, Helga pressed the small green 'line one' button.
"Good morning, Phoebe." Helga said cheerfully, as it had been weeks since she had spoken to her best friend, due to their conflicting work schedules. It certainly was not out of the ordinary that the two friends go for weeks at a time without contact, considering that they were both so busy in their respective careers, but that certainly didn't mean either of them liked it.
"Hello Helga." Phoebe said back with just as much enthusiasm, "But, it is past noon now in Hillwood."
Helga laughed at her friends inescapable accuracy, "Yes Pheebs, but it's morning where you are." she said proudly, glancing down again at the handy little clock gadget she had installed on her laptop, and set to San Diego time.
"Actually, Helga, I've been called into our Hillwood facility for the next few weeks." Phoebe began to explain, as the phone crackled a little, "I landed this morning."
Helga, who was a little stunned by the sudden news, but mainly excited at the possibility of Phoebe being so close, close enough to see in person, had promptly dropped the pen she had been holding onto her desk. However, realising that a shocked, gaping expression did nothing to help a phone call, which was particularly reliant on voice communication, she snapped from her little trance and began to respond, "An impromptu visit, hey?" she asked, "Must be important."
Of course, Helga was stating that it must be important, and certainly not asking if it was, because it was already rather obvious that something out of the ordinary had to have happened. Phoebe's line of research was firmly based at the San Diego facility, and had been for the past two years, so a sudden cross-country flight certainly indicated that some sort of pressing situation, or medical emergency, had arisen.
"Certainly, Helga." Phoebe's, very quiet and patient, voice confirmed, "We have stumbled upon a breakthrough that may finally lead us toward a possible treatment for lung cancer."
Hardly needing another excuse to be super impressed, and infinitely proud, of her best friend and all her achievements, Helga received one anyway and this time, she even let out a little girly gasp, simply because this was particularly amazing news. "Phoebe, that's amazing!" she almost squealed, in her most excited 'my-best-friend-is-part-of-a-leading-cancer-research-team' voice. And, yes, she did have a specific tone of voice for that, because, well, it was very important.
"I must concur." Phoebe responded levelly to Helga's excitement, although, her best friend was all too aware that if she did not have a professional image, and serious mind-frame, to preserve that Phoebe Heyerdahl would currently be doing backflips in excitement, "I am most excited about the prospects."
Unsure of how long Phoebe had spare to chat with her this afternoon, Helga's eyes quickly fell onto her weekly planner, now open on her desk, and she set her mind to the very important task of organising a time to see her dearly missed best friend. "So, you'll be here for a few weeks, right?" she quickly confirmed, taking note of various days with availability over lunchtime.
"Yes." Phoebe said contemplatively, "The timeframe is uncertain at this particular point in time, but, I think we should allocate time to meet with each other, as soon as possible." she finished, practically reading Helga's mind, as per usual.
Helga grinned a little, "I'm with you on that, Pheebs." she quipped back, settling her eyes on the very first availability she could locate in her planner, "I can do tomorrow, actually, how does that sound to you?"
"Tomorrow suits me perfectly, Helga." Phoebe said happily, before a little pause, and slight hesitation prior to uttering her next thought, which even came out sounding a little unsure, "I'd love to dine at Chez Paris, if that would be acceptable?"
Phoebe had always remained cautious in regards to the subject of ice-cream and anything which was even slightly related to him. Whilst Helga was unsure to this day how their silent, yet mutual, agreement had initiated, Phoebe had never once over the years asked questions and, in return, Helga had kept the issue largely to herself, bar crisis situations. In fact, their agreed silence in regards to the topic was the reason Helga had known nothing about Arnold's life over the past decade when she had arrived back in Hillwood.
However, despite the limited, and coded, information that was shared between the two of them, Phoebe's level of knowledge on the subject was extensive, and actually in all honesty, borderline scary. Chez Paris served as a poignant example of that, because, Helga had never once mentioned her initial plan to her best friend, nor had she ever spoken about the events at any point in time afterward. And yet, Phoebe had just simply always known.
Helga, who was truly coming to realise how many of her own unhealthy behavioural habits had not been solved over the years, confidently assured her slightly nervous friend that, "Yes, Chez Paris is fine."
A small, subtle, breath of relief could be heard through the phone receiver as the news that she had not scared nor offended her best friend, reached Phoebe's ears and Helga knew Phoebe must have been curious as to why the subject of Chez Paris went down so casually, when she timidly asked, "Have you been to many of the old places since you move back?"
Deciding that, in the efforts of moving on from her childhood, she would need to finally have an open, and name inclusive, conversation with her long-time best friend, Helga thought back honestly over her activities from the past two weeks. "Not really." she had to admit, although she could safely and thankfully say that hadn't been because she was avoiding doing so, but purely because she had been far too busy, "It wouldn't be the same without you anyway, Pheebs. Of course, I've been to Green Meats a few times, and I did walk to the pier on the weekend, but, that's about all."
Phoebe must have been thinking much along the same lines as Helga, in regards to seeing through a truthful and inclusive discussion, because she quickly reminded her, "And PS118, of course, Helga." and after a brief pause, possibly just in case Helga started grumbling unpleasant words into the phone, she asked, "How was your first week there?"
Helga took a deep breath, and almost forgot to release it once more, before attempting to speak and with a pointless shake of the head, that Phoebe couldn't even see, and a stupid sigh for dramatic effect, she said very steadily, "Phoebe, you will not believe what the world has thrown at me this time."
"Oh dear, Helga." was Phoebe's immediate, and sightly predictable yet comforting, response, "Is everything okay?"
"Everything's fine, Phoebe." she was quick to assure her best friend, and was even a little surprised that it wasn't actually much of a lie at all, "I'm a grown woman, I can handle it." and, despite things like her trembling hands when he smiled and her rapid heartbeat when he joked with her, she felt overall slightly more confident that it was true.
However, her over-confident assurances did not seem to quell Phoebe's concern, and seconds later the small and worried voice of her best friend asked, "Oh Helga, what has happened?"
"I saw her the moment I walked in, Pheebs..." Helga began, with a far off reminiscent tone that almost reminded her of something you'd hear in a movie, "Yelling, pushing kids in the hallway, throwing eraser cuttings at a certain boy in the second row..." and at that she trailed off slightly, somewhat lost in memories, and also knowing that she had provided enough information to warrant a response from Phoebe.
Her best friend giggled a little, making a crackling sound through Helga's phone speaker a little, and after taking her moment to enjoy the irony of the tale, Phoebe said, "Oh my Helga, sounds like you've located yourself a mini-me!"
"Yeah." Helga laughed along with her, twirling her purple pen around in her fingers, "Her name is Angela, we had our first session last Wednesday, it's like... looking into a strange mirror."
Phoebe hummed a little on the other end of the line, before stating with a little bemusement, "Well, Helga, that doesn't sound so bad at all." and after not receiving an immediate response, she added, "I'm not entirely sure I understand what the problem could be, is she causing you trouble?"
Chuckling at that, Helga drew a little smiley face next to the words, Chez Paris w/ Phoebe, in her planner, "Surprisingly not." she informed Phoebe happily, "She actually seems to trust me. The problem is her teacher."
"Okay Helga." Phoebe responded thoughtfully, obviously now settling herself into her hotel room, as Helga could hear the clicks of doors and the polite voice of the room attendant dropping off her bags, "I believe I will require you to elaborate before I can come to a full understanding of the issue at hand."
Helga tapped her fingers against the plastic casing of her favourite pen, "Let's just say..." she began carefully ,"that Angela's teacher is the boy from the second row I used to throw things at."
Finally having revealed this, albeit without actually saying his name yet, which was honestly a hard habit to break if she was being honest; Helga was now waiting patiently for Phoebe's reply. However, it didn't appear to be coming, instead all she could hear in response was a slight static on the line, and otherwise, complete silence. Helga actually began to wonder if her friend had been disconnected, that maybe her line had cut out, and so after a few extra seconds of silence, she tentatively asked, "Phoebe, are you still there?"
Phoebe whispered, very quietly, so quietly that Helga almost didn't hear it, "He's going to figure it out." and Helga noted that her poor best friend sounded, well, absolutely terrified.
Unable to help herself, Helga actually had to bite her lip to stop from little tears escaping at just how much Phoebe clearly cared about this. Knowing that her best friend took her problems, her secrets, so seriously that she was practically having a heart attack on her behalf was, well, absolutely heart-warming.
"No doubt about it, Grubworm." Helga responded, trying to add a little confidence and assurance to the situation, so that Phoebe would cease being so incredibly worried. Once again, Phoebe was silent on the other end of the line, so Helga decided to continue on, "I almost backed out of the case for that very reason, but, I talked to Bliss about it and she reminded me that this is for Angela and it's important... and she's right."
Phoebe, after clearly making a special effort to calm down, now let out a squeaky mumble, about something Helga couldn't quite decipher, and then fell a silent again.
Helga sighed, knowing that Phoebe knew, that Helga knew, that the final point of discussion had not yet been addressed, "But..." she continued, with an involuntary grimace on her face, "the very moment Angela confesses to me, marks the moment I need to come to terms with unveiling twenty years of secrecy."
"Do you think you can do it?" Phoebe's voice echoed through the receiver, asking the one question that simply begged to be asked, yet the one that Helga had repetitively asked herself over the past week and a half, and had only recently come to a conclusion about.
"You know what Phoebe, I think I can." Helga proudly stated, and although she didn't want to do it, nor would she be able to function properly while she did, she knew that she could and she would when the time came, "I mean, it was a long time ago."
Phoebe didn't respond immediately, and Helga knew that her friend was still worried, and clearly, as a Scientist does, was pondering the possible outcomes of such an 'experiment', "But, what if he asks more questions?" she wondered out loud.
Helga frowned, not entirely certain where this might lead, "Aside from, 'were you in love with me when we were in elementary school', what other questions could he possibly want to ask?" and she was legitimately curious, now maybe even a little nervous, what the answer to that may be, because questions beyond that had not ever entered her mind as a possibility.
"Well, certainly things like for how long you were in love with him, or even more concerningly, if you still are..." Phoebe said softly, almost whispering the last few words.
And, Helga's stomach did an uncomfortable little flip flop at that, because she now realised that Arnold may want to ask further questions, questions like those, but... "Surely he wouldn't assume I'm still crazy about him!" she protested, "Honestly, I've been gone for twelve years."
Phoebe hummed into the phone, and Helga could tell that she would currently be nodding slightly, and frowning a little whilst deep in thought. "Well, Helga..." she said firmly, indicating the next question was going to be a very significant one, "do you still love him?"
Despite the fact that never before had they delved so deep, or so explicitly, into the subject of Arnold, nor Helga's feelings for him, she felt it was incredibly important that she was entirely honest with her best friend right now. "Phoebe..." she began, letting out a long and wistful breath of air, "I think you know as well as I do, that something like that doesn't just go away."
"You do have a very relevant point there, Helga..." Phoebe softly conceded.
Helga immediately identified her chance, the opportunity to finally right one of the most horribly unnatural wrongs she had ever known throughout her life, "Speaking of which, Phoebe." she began slyly, referring to Phoebe's prior indirect confession, "I am begging you, while you're in Hillwood – call Tall Hair Boy!"
"Helga..." Phoebe began to protest, in the all-too-familiar warning, but uncertain, tone she always used when it came to matters regarding Gerald Johanssen, "I really don't think bothering Gerald would be-"
But, Helga didn't even let her finish, for she was a woman on a mission. "Phoebe, you know what Arnold told me the other day?" she said, very authoritively, no longer willing to sit back and watch her best friend and the boy with the gravity defying hair fight fate, "That Geraldo has been nuts about you since pre-school, so, get off the phone to me, and call him!"
"You know what, Helga." Phoebe started, with a tone of pure determination that Helga had honestly not been prepared for, but certainly liked the sound of, "If you're about to indirectly confess to Arnold, then the least I could do is have dinner with Gerald."
Helga, who was now gripping her desk so tightly in happiness and relief, she was amazed she hadn't broken the entire thing, let out a delighted cheer, "That's the spirit!" she encouraged, "Call him right now, before you chicken out, okay?"
"Yes ma'am." Phoebe responded diligently, before tacking on a polite, "See you tomorrow." and then hanging up the phone.
Helga smiled at her receiver for a good few moments and then uttered a joyous "Go get 'em, Pheebs", before realising that what she was doing looked, well, crazy... and she was supposed to be a mentally sound individual capable of counselling young children, or, at least she was supposed to look like one.
