When she thought about it, Sansa knew she'd have given up anything to have her family back.
If only she had been smarter back then, if only she had listened to her father when he had told her he was sending her back to Winterfell. But she had fought against leaving King's Landing back then and then days later her father lost his head. She'd been left a prisoner to Joffrey and his mother, mistreated by the boy king and his court. And it wasn't much longer after her father's death that she lost her mother and her oldest brother, too. Alone in the world with no one left to protect her, she got her first taste of true sorrow.
Back then, she had thought life could not get much worse. Oh, if only she could have gone back to those days! Her time spent in King's Landing had been truly awful but then she'd been sold to the Bolton's and her life had become so much worse. Though rescued from Ramsay's clutches, Sansa would not ever forget all that he had done to her; tortured and raped, used and abused. Though her physical wounds had mostly healed, Sansa knew part of her would always feel the pain Ramsay had left upon her heart and mind. Some days were better than others- helping Jon to rule over all of the North helped keep her mind afloat, reminding her of all that was yet to be lost. Though she'd lost nearly everything... There were still a few things left. A few very precious things.
And one of those was knocking heavily upon her door.
It was as she rolled over onto her side that the door to her chamber burst open and Jon stepped over the threshold, shutting the door in the maid's face who was protesting his entry. "Still abed, are you?" He said as he came to stand before her grand bed, dressed in dark breeches and a white overshirt that looked rumpled, as if he'd slept in it the night before. "The morning call came an hour ago already." Jon crossed the room and took hold of her curtains, pulling them apart so the morning, winter sunlight might spill into her chamber. "Come on then."
A sigh escaped her as she rolled onto her other side and pushed herself up onto an elbow, looking out at him there beside her window. The morning sun illuminated him nicely, the golden rays bouncing off his dark curls in the most enticing of ways. "You are going to give poor Agatha a heart attack if you keep barging in here like that. She finds it most unseemly." A smile twitched on her lips as Jon's face broke out into a grin, his brown eyes finding hers as he approached her side of the bed. He silently gestured at the empty space on her bed, a silent question of his joining her, to which she nodded. He climbed onto the end of her bed as she drew her legs up to offer him a bit more space.
"Unseemly?" Jon spoke with a chuckle as he settled into place, reaching up to run a hand through his dark curls, "I suppose she's right." Something unspoken fell between them and Sansa glanced his way, blue eyes finding brown. In the few weeks since their reunion, she and Jon certainly had developed a bond that they'd never had as kids. In truth, she'd been awful to him back then, taking for granted the relationship she had with her other siblings. Her true siblings as she might have said back then. But Sansa knew better now; she had grown as a person and knew that Jon was her family through and through. And in truth he was all she had left except for Arya. She had decided a long time ago that she would never again take her family for granted. "You look well this morning." His voice brought her back and Sansa returned her gaze to his face, where sure enough he was already looking at her.
This had become their usual routine; Sansa couldn't say when it had first started, but it had been ongoing for a few weeks already. In the beginning he'd knock until she opened the door for him, but in the last few days he'd become so comfortable with her that he'd begun to just come in after a few knocks. Sansa also had to suspect that he enjoyed causing Agatha a bit of grief in the mornings. "I feel well," she admitted after a moment, absently brushing a stray lock of hair from her face. "Truly." Jon's smile at her words brought one to her own features and she reached out, sliding her hand into place over his. Jon did not hesitate in turning his hand over, fingers clutching hers, surprising Sansa by the tender gesture. For a moment, neither of them spoke and Sansa could feel her heart racing fast within her chest. She was reminded of her first time meeting Joffrey, when a rush of excitement and anticipation had rushed through her, back before she knew who he truly had been. These feelings she'd begun to develop far exceeded that of a sibling bond. Confusion set in and she awkwardly drew her hand back, blushing to the roots of her flaming hair. "I should dress," she said, slipping off her bed, suddenly well aware of how thin her chemise was.
Jon, sensing her attitude change, nodded and rose up from the bed as well, pausing only a moment to stand before her. "I am proud of you, Sansa," he whispered as his hands slid into place on either side of her face, palms cradling her cheeks as he drew her towards him for a simple kiss to her forehead. When he let her go, it took them both a moment longer to step back from the other, Sansa finding she longed for him to trace his fingertips across more than just her cheeks. Startled again by these new thoughts, it was she that took the first step back, smiling as he headed towards the door, disappearing behind it only after he'd raised his hand to give her a simple little wave. A moment later, Agatha entered looking distressed, grumbling about the new King in the North and his no regard for his sister's privacy, but Sansa was all smiles as her maid began to help her undress. She could not calm the racing of her heart nor the warmth of her skin from where his hands had once been; uncertain as she was, Sansa knew this was the first touch she'd had in years that she'd not trembled beneath the person reaching out. For the first time in years, she was not afraid of the person who touched her. Though these feelings were confusing, they had been built on trust and healing, so Sansa could not so easily let it go, no matter how unseemly someone thought it might be. In Jon, she had found peace and she would never allow someone to take that from her.
With Jon, she felt safe again, and that was something she never thought she'd feel again.
