A/N: Here is the next chapter.

El Gringo Loco: You could be right about Dr. Albert, but I think it will take a few more chapters until we finally get to know him...
Lindsey: You are curious if Sara has a nightmare? Where would be the drama if she hadn't:-)
Samantha: Thanks for the information. I try to keep that in mind. I relied on my dictionary here and it's obvious not perfect ...
Chione of the Nile: You wanna know Saras historie with Grissom? I bet you are not alone. But its part of the story, so you'll have to wait. I already have made great plans for that information to come out. But it will take a while ...


Chapter 8

It was way past midnight when Catherine felt movement beside her. Slowly she opened her eyes. Where was she? It took a few seconds for her eyes to adjust to the darkness. The only sources of light were two small windows on the wall to her right. A few beams of moonlight filtered through the half closed curtains and onto the bed.

She blinked a few times to clear the fog in her still half asleep mind. This definitely wasn't her bedroom. The blonde glanced around the room. Then it hit her: Louisiana. The seminar. She was in the room she had to share with Sara.

Sara. She turned to her side and came to face with her younger co-worker. The brunette was still asleep but obviously anything but relaxed. Her whole body was tense and her face looked pained. Her head turned from one side to the other. Catherine concluded that Sara was the reason she had woken.

The brunette was obviously having a nightmare – exactly like she predicted before they had gone to bed. The blonde had hoped that Sara would be wrong. Catherine took a quick look at her watch which was lying on the nightstand. It was almost one. At least they both had gotten a few hours of sleep. Now she had to try to calm her co-worker so they both could sleep a bit more.

"Don't." Sara's raspy voice startled her. She turned back to face her, expecting to find her awake. But instead, the brunette was having an even more vivid dream. She was now tossing and turning, and sweat was starting to build on her forehead.

Immediately Catherine's mother instincts started to kick in. She wanted nothing more than to take Sara's obvious pain away. Like a few hours ago she reached for her hand, but her action didn't have the desired effect. Sara started to thrash around more. "Don't. Don't hurt me." Her voice was filled with panic, but she was still asleep.

Catherine didn't let go of her hand, instead she started to stroke it slowly. Then she started to talk to Sara in soft tone. "It's okay, Honey. I'm not going to hurt you." The brunette still tried to get her hand away from Catherine.

"I'll be good. Please." Sara pleaded with whoever was torturing her in her dream.

Without letting go of her hand, Catherine started to stroke Sara's now damp hair with her other hand. "Shhh, it's alright. You're safe." This seemed to calm the younger woman a bit, so Catherine continued. "Everything is okay. I'm right here. You're not alone." She went on for a few more minutes, whispering and stroking Sara's hair.

Finally she succeeded. The brunette was sleeping peacefully again, her breathing was normal, and her body relaxed. Catherine mentally patted herself on the shoulder and smiled.

Sara looked so young and vulnerable in her sleep. Like so often in the last days, Catherine started to wonder what it was that made the brunette tick. What caused such nightmares? How often did she have them? All the time or just since she had found out that they were going to this seminar?

And what were her dreams about? Old cases or something that happened in her past? 'Don't hurt me. I'll be good.' That's what she had said. Who did that to her? A friend, a lover, her family? This was definitely something they had to talk about. Those nightmares weren't healthy – at least not if she had them all the time.

Hopefully they could work out, or better, eliminate the sources of her nightmares during the seminar. Sara needed to sleep more – and she needed to eat. She was far too thin for someone her height. There were so many things that had to change. Tomorrow, Catherine told herself. Right now they needed to sleep for a few more hours.

The blonde placed a quick kiss on Sara's forehead, and was about to put her back under the covers, when her eyes fell Sara's stomach, which was illuminated by the moonlight. During her struggle, the brunette's shirt had ridden up a bit, revealing the soft skin underneath.

"Oh my god!" Catherine gasped at what she saw. Right above her navel were four tiny cuts, each about three inches long. They were too regular and clean to have gotten there just by accident. Slowly she traced a finger over the cuts, which were still deep red, indicating that they were, at most, only a few days old.

"Oh Honey, what did you do to yourself?" Sara didn't respond. She was still asleep. Catherine sighed. This was getting worse. She had obviously underestimated Sara's situation. When she moved down to grab the cover her eyes lingered again on Sara's stomach.

Under the fresh cuts she could make out some old scars. This definitely wasn't an exception. Catherine shook her head in order to get rid of the image of a totally lost and confused Sara sitting in her bathroom with a razor in her hand. She grabbed she sheets and tugged them over the brunette again.

But instead of lying down on her side of the bed, she snuggled as close as possible to Sara, and protectively draped an arm over her stomach. She wanted to hold her, to make her feel safe, anything to make her feel better, because right now she felt so helpless.

Catherine didn't know what to do or what to feel. She was angry at Sara for doing something that stupid. She was angry at her for not coming to her or anyone else. She was angry at her for not asking for help. She really wanted to wake her up and yell at her.

But she couldn't. Sara looked so peaceful right now. Catherine just couldn't be angry with her. She really wanted to – but she couldn't. Instead of being angry at Sara she was suddenly angry at herself, angry for not doing anything, angry for not realising the seriousness of the situation, angry for not being a friend. And she was angry at Nick, Warrick and Greg. She was angry at Grissom and Brass. They were all supposed to be there for her too!

How the hell was it possible that no one had ever noticed something like this? They were all trained investigators. How could they miss this? How could they not notice this call for help? Catherine felt like she was going to be sick. She quickly swallowed the lump that was forming in her throat. She didn't want to let go of Sara. She wasn't sure who needed the contact more right now – Sara or herself.

The blonde blinked back some tears which threatened to fall. She had to be strong for Sara. Maybe this seminar was the best thing that could happen to Sara. If they weren't here right now Catherine probably would have never noticed what was going on with her young co-worker.

She closed her eyes, hoping that somehow she could fall back to sleep. But all she could think about was the woman in her arms. She had so many questions right now. When was Sara cutting herself? Was it a regular thing? Or was that her way to unwind after a tough case?

When things got ugly at work, they all need something to keep them grounded. Catherine had Lindsey, Warrick had Tina, Grissom had his bugs. Often the whole group went out for drinks. They were drinking, chatting, and enjoying not being alone. Sara never went with them in the last months.

Her standard excuses were "I have to finish something at the lab" or "I'm tired. I'm going home". Now Catherine had a good idea of what Sara was doing when she went home. Suddenly the blonde thought back to the flight. The little incident with good old Jack Daniels.

Alcohol and a razor were definitely not a good combination. Did Sara really think those are her only true friends? The thought alone made Catherine's stomach turn. She knew that she needed to do something before they lost Sara forever.

She certainly had to make a plan of how to handle this after they were back in Vegas. She had to make sure that Sara wasn't spending so much time at the lab anymore and maybe … Her train of thought was interrupted when a realisation hit her. What if there wasn't anymore Sara in the lab? What if Ecklie succeeded?

Catherine immediately tightened her hold of Sara. Before the seminar she thought if Sara really lost her job it would be really hard for her to deal with. But she would make it, because she was a strong and smart woman. But one thought never crossed her mind.

A thought that was now written in neon signs in her mind. Suicide! Was Sara really capable of something like that? Catherine's panicked mind screamed yes.

A small part of her mind – probably the rational one – told her that she was exaggerating. Those were just tiny cuts. Not like she cut her writs. A lot of people are doing that too. But the other part of Catherine's mind just saw the cuts, the alcohol, the nightmare, the unsociability. That, combined with what she saw every day at work, made her expect the worst.

So somehow she had to make sure that Sara wouldn't loose her job - and if she had to kill Ecklie … she would be there for Sara. No matter what. With this thought she drifted off into a restless sleep.


A/N: Thanks for reading. Reviews are welcomed :-)

And I have a general question: What would you like to see Sara and Catherine do as a trust building activity? I have a few ideas, but could need a bit more inspiration. Any suggestions???