He awoke with a start again. The last memory that he had was of him sitting in between the stacks and stacks of books. The reset put him back where he always restarted. He had come to no solid conclusions the day before, and he was frustrated by it all. He needed to talk to Sam and Cas about the situation. They could help with the research. He hadn't spoken with them before, because he hadn't wanted to stop the repeating. He had been happy. He still was. Only now, he could see himself being happy with new days too, and that was something quite good.
He plucked up his phone from off of the nightstand. He called Cas. He answered on the first ring, like he was permanently staring at the phone, just waiting for Dean's call. "Are you okay?" Not, hello, Dean, like he expected.
"Yes. And hello to you too," Dean responded.
"It is very early for you to be up. I have to assume that something is wrong."
"No, I'm fine. I just wanted you to come over." Dean paused awkwardly. They had done much over the last couple of days that had given Dean a feeling of intimacy with Cas, but those days were his and his alone. Cas was all business in his tone, and Dean had to remind himself to tread cautiously. "I need your expertise on something. Could you come to the bunker, or are you busy?"
"I'll be right over. Are you sure that you are okay?" Cas still sounded concerned.
"Yes, Cas, just come over."
"Okay." Cas hung up and Dean had only to wait. It was still early by even Sam's standards. He would not be up to check on Dean for another hour. Dean got dressed and headed out to the main room to wait.
Cas arrived not long after. Dean looked at him, slightly disheveled tie, ever present trenchcoat, and wondered if they could just skip the research for one day. He pushed that aside though and said, "Today has already happened." Not his most eloquent explanation, but it would have to do.
"What do you mean?' Cas just stared at him like that could make the explanation come out better.
Dean stepped up close to him. He felt like he wanted to talk about too many things at once. He wanted to talk about the snow and the movie and the way that Cas tasted like sugar cookies, or maybe he just imagined that last bit. He thought about the bigger situation then and he just said. "I keep reliving the same day over and over." Cas looked at him, perplexed at first, then his look changed.
And in that instant, Dean found himself back in his bed. The day had reset and it was not midnight. "What the hell?" He got up and stormed around the room. He looked over at the clock on the nightstand, mocking him. He grabbed it and flung it at the wall. It broke in a spectacular array of plastic shards and electronic bits.
Sam was in his room in an instant. "What the hell, Dean? Are you okay?" Sam's words seemed to parrot him. He was even more irritated.
He was yelling out jibberish now about how it didn't make sense and Sam was starting to look deeply concerned. "It was always midnight. Why the hell did I end up back here? Why can't I just get it to stop?"
"Dean, you gotta slow down. I don't understand what you are saying. What always happens at midnight?"
"Today, Sammy. Today always happens at midnight. It keeps resetting. The day keeps resetting."
And in that instant, Dean found himself back in his bed again. There was no Sam in the room, no broken clock, no tell-tale signs of Dean's rage from just moments ago. Dean laid there fighting for control of his breathing. He didn't know what to do. He was starting to feel like he was a part of someone's sick game. Before, he felt blessed. It was like someone was giving him the gift of one perfect day over and over. Now he just wanted to make it stop. It wasn't feeling so perfect anymore.
He got up, got dressed, and left the room. He pulled on his jacket and gloves. He thought about leaving a note for Sammy, but why bother? He grabbed the keys to the Impala and within minutes they were racing down the road together. The rough road beneath him was soothing away the irritation that had taken over. He turned on the radio and "White Christmas" poured out of the speakers, reminding him that his life was still on repeat in so many ways.
He headed outside of the town toward the tree farm that they had visited the night before. It was very early, or very late depending on your perspective. The sun had not come up yet. He expected the parking lot to be empty. It wasn't. The thing that was most surprising to him, was not that the lot contained a car, but that the car belonged to Cas.
He pulled up alongside Cas' vehicle and cut the engine. He got out and peered down into the window. Cas was not there, and there were no telling signs inside. "Where the heck are you, Cas?" He wandered down the path that wound its way into the center of the tree yard. It was a big place, complete with out buildings that had contained a Santa photo booth, Christmas crafts, and food. There was a small ice skating rink at the center of the yard, and all around it one could find the perfect Christmas tree. He let his vision roam slowly over the holiday landscape until he spotted Cas on the far end of the yard. He stalked over to him.
Cas heard his approach and turned before he got to him. "What are you doing here?" Cas asked instead of the usual greeting.
"Yes, I know, I don't normally get up this early. And hello to you too, Cas." Don't say too much. I don't want to trigger a reset. That much he thought he had figured out. "Something didn't sit well with me about this place the other night. I wanted to check it out, see if it was okay." He felt like his explanation was flimsy, but Cas seemed to accept it. "Why are you here?"
Cas didn't answer right away. He just looked at Dean. They stood there like that for a few moments and then when it should have been well into a place of awkwardness, he said, "I am here for the exact same reason you are." Then they both stopped talking again as if they both were afraid of words. They made their way to the spot where he and Sam had ganked that witch Frau Perchta. She was a Christmas witch, because, yeah, that's a thing. He looked down at the burned patch of ground at his feet. He thought that they had finished this, but perhaps it had been too easy. Things were never easy with them.
Dean wondered how much he could say. How much could he reference without getting sent back to his bed? He felt Cas' hand on his back he turned just slightly to him. Cas looked serious. "What are you thinking, Cas?"
Cas didn't answer out loud. He just moved his hand onto his arm, giving him a pointed look. Dean didn't say anything, but he reached up and put his hand on Cas' shoulder. It was a mirror of their stance from the other night. He thought about just how similar it was, when Cas leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. "What was that for?" Dean asked, feeling foolish for asking in the first place. It didn't matter what it was for. Don't discourage this, Winchester.
Cas looked at him like he was a little disappointed by Dean's reaction. "Hmm. Interesting."
"What?" Dean was thoroughly confused now. Cas started walking away at a brisk clip. He got to the cut your own tree part of the property. "Stop, Cas." He caught him by the arm and pulled him around to face him.
"Frustrating." They just stood there for a moment while Dean processed that one word. God, we are so on the same page.
"Very." Dean added to Cas' sentence. A slight smile quirked up the side of Cas' lips. He stepped into Dean's personal space. Dean didn't hesitate this time. He dipped his head to Cas and kissed him. It was not like the chaste little cheek peck that Cas had given him just a moment ago. It was the kind of kiss that would knock the pictures off of walls. It was the kind of kiss that you give when you have been starving. It is the kind of kiss that demanded and gave. It was how he imagined all of their kisses would be, because this was Cas. He could not imagine either of them doing anything simply. He hoped that it would always feel this intense, this right.
They parted and stared at each other. "That was not frustrating." Cas stated simply.
Dean laughed. "And here I thought that I was going to have to spend all day building up to that again."
And Cas gave him a look. Then Dean was back in his bed again. The clock glowed out in the darkness. Dean laid there staring at the ceiling, pissed. Then he took a deep breath and let it out. He ran his tongue out along his lips, seeking out the taste that should still be lingering there, but it wasn't. He had his memories though, he thought with a smile. So he closed his eyes for a spell and let those carry him.
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AN: I am having a hard time keeping it fluffy. This chapter was not fluffy enough. Basically, my rules for this fic are that Dean and Cas will interact in every chapter and they will hopefully do something cute/Christmassy. I also told myself that it had to get published by midnight in order to count as a daily. So far so good. I write the chapter the same day that it gets published. It is sort of a stream of conscious effort. This is a little different from my other fics as they are supposed to be plotty. This one feels like it is getting plotty. I might dial that back a little, but we will see. Anyway, I hope that you are enjoying this. 'Till tomorrow.
