Jordan's POV:
I wasn't sure how much longer I could keep my secret from the guys. Ian had caught me coming inside the other night and Josh had definitely smelled it on me. My mind scrambled to find another way to keep things hidden. I couldn't let them find out. I was terrified about how they would react.
The day right after that show, I remained normal and didn't do anything that would tip them off. I just went through my day like they had always seen me do. On our way to the next city we played board games, talked about all kinds of stuff and everything was normal.
"Good afternoon, my darling," Ian greeted me when he got up at 3 pm.
He gave me a little kiss and a big hug. I smiled at him and greeted him as well.
"I don't understand how you can sleep like that, dude," Josh shook his head.
Ian shrugged and sat down beside me after grabbing some random items out of the fridge. He started eating his really late breakfast and the rest of us continued on with the game of Uno we had started. "Uno!" I shouted when I realized that I was holding my last card.
Matt laughed and slapped down a pick up four card.
I gave him an angry look, picked up my cards and put two pick up two cards down. Josh grumbled and picked up eight cards.
Once the game was over, in which I had inevitably won, Matt and Josh did some song writing and Mike, Ian and I watched a movie on the small TV that was in the bus. I ended up falling asleep curled into Ian's side.
Mike's POV:
"Pst," I whispered to Ian, trying not to wake a sleeping Jordan between us.
"What?"
"Are you as suspicious as the rest of us are?" I nodded my head toward the sleeping girl.
He looked confused. "Of what?"
"I dunno. Josh says something is going on. He won't tell me and Matt what it is, but he says something is going on with her and she's not telling us."
"Now that I think about it, sorta. I did notice something last night, but I really don't think it is anything."
"What do you think it is?" I asked, curious as to what he thought.
"I'm not sure. I really don't wanna jump to any conclusions without knowing what is actually going on," he brushed a strand of hair out of Jordan's face.
"Okay, well I hope it's nothing."
"Me too."
Ian's POV:
We ended up spending the entire day on the bus, doing nothing productive, except for Matt and Josh, who had started writing a new song out of pure boredom. After Jordan had fallen asleep during the movie, it had gotten fairly late so I tucked her into her bunk and went to bed myself. The next day was pretty much the same thing, until the evening rolled around and we finally figured out what had been going on this whole time.
Josh's POV:
"Jordan, I need to talk to you. Now," I had said once it had gotten dark two days after the show in Edmonton.
When I had lifted Jordan up during the show the other night, I could smell something that I hoped I would never have to smell again. Marijuana. It was like somebody stabbed me in the chest and violently twisted the knife when I figured it out. That was why she had gone missing earlier and that's why she had been spending a lot of time outside by herself. I felt stupid for not noticing it earlier. I wanted to confront her about it, but I just wasn't sure how. Until now.
"What do you wanna talk about?" she asked me.
I sighed. "Come here. We need to talk outside for a second."
She got up slowly and reluctantly from Ian's side on the couch. I closed the door behind her when we were both out of the parked vehicle
"Jordan, I know what you've been doing."
"What do you mean?" she was playing dumb.
"I can smell it on you. I know you're a pot head. What the fuck is going on?"
She just stared at me, not sure what to say. She knew she was in trouble. I had backed her into a metaphorical corner.
"I-I'm sorry. I-" she stumbled with her words.
"Jordan, please. Don't do this."
"Josh, I know, I just-"
"No, stop. Listen to me for a minute. You can't do this. I was addicted to heroin a long time ago," I choked the words and Jordan listened. "It was ruining my life. I had to make a choice. I was forced to choose between music and drugs. I knew that I couldn't do both. I chose the music, and it was hard to quit, but I did it. Music has always meant more to me than anything, and now, Jordan, you mean so much to me. I can't watch this happen to you."
"It's just weed."
"No, Jordan. It's not. Once you're on that for a while, you'll start experimenting with other things and before you know it, you're being dragged to rehab, kicking and screaming and that's the best case scenario."
"Phf, yeah right. I'm not that dumb," she stared at the ground.
"That doesn't matter!" I started almost shouting at her. "You can be really fucking smart and tell yourself that you'd never do drugs, but if you start with one thing, chances are you're going to end up doing much more than just that in the long run," I put my hands on her arms. "Jordan, you can't do both. You have to choose one. Don't do this to yourself, don't do this to Ian, and please don't do this to me."
I noticed that I had started crying and my knees were shaking. I didn't think it was possible to get this upset over my sister doing something like this. Jordan looked at me with concern in her eyes. I pulled her into a hug and held her tightly.
"Please, Jordan."
I heard the RV door open and somebody leap out the door. Then, Ian's voice rang out behind me.
"What's going on? Josh, why are you crying?"
Jordan gently pushed me away and looked at my friend with a guilty look on her face. She looked back at me, as if asking me to tell him for her.
I shook my head. "You have to tell him yourself," and I walked back into the RV, leaving them alone outside.
Ian's POV:
"Tell me what?" I looked at Jordan perplexedly.
"Um, well…" she kicked the dirt lightly with her toe.
"What's going on, Jordan? Please tell me."
She looked at me and tears started falling from those big, blue eyes of hers. I held her as close to me as I could and let her cry on my shoulder.
"I'm sorry, Ian. I'm so, so sorry. I didn't think it was that bad. I never thought any of this would happen. I'm sorry," she sobbed.
"Please tell me, what's wrong? I can help you," I rubbed her back softly.
She shook her head. "No, you can't. I have to do this myself. I don't want to hurt you too."
"Jordan, what is going on?" I said in a more demanding tone.
She looked up at me, tears staining her cheeks. "I've been smoking marijuana for the last couple years. You and Josh are the only people that know other than the people back in my hometown that I buy from. I've never told anybody before."
I didn't know what to say to her. I just stared down at her and wondered why she would even do something like this. When I finally managed to get some words out they weren't much. "But, why?"
"When you've dealt with as much as I have, there isn't much else to do. I guess I just made the wrong friends."
"I-I need some time to think about this," I said to her, letting her go and turning around to go for a walk.
"Ian-"
"Just give me some time. Please," and with that I walked off.
Jordan's POV:
I watched as Ian walked off the parking lot and to the sidewalk. He started walking down the sidewalk and disappeared around the corner of a building. I sat down on the pavement and leaned up against the wheel of the RV. I hadn't realized how badly they'd react. I felt like I had hurt my brother and my boyfriend immensely and there was nothing I could do to fix it. I sat outside, by myself, for a few minutes before Josh emerged from the bus. He saw that Ian had left me on my own and he sat down beside me.
"He didn't react well, I suppose?"
I shook my head. "I'm sorry, Josh. I didn't think…"
"That's right. You didn't think, and that's okay. What we need to concentrate on now is getting you through this and making sure you're okay."
Josh stood up, put his feet on my toes and held out his hands. I took his hands and he lifted me off the ground. "What can I do? I mean, about Ian."
"Just let him cool off. He'll be okay. He loves you too much to let this get in the way," he smiled at me.
I wiped the tears from my face and leaned against my brother. He hugged me and opened the door for me. I stepped inside where I saw Matt and Mike looking rather disappointed in me. I sat down on the couch and Mike immediately hugged me tightly like he always did.
"Is it safe to assume Josh told you what's going on?" I asked him.
"Indeed it is. He figured it'd be enough for you to tell Ian on your own," Matt said quietly.
"I hope he's not too mad," I stared at my feet and tried to imagine what Ian could possibly be thinking right now.
A/N: Okay, shorter chapter. I know. You all hate me. That's okay. I had an exam okay. Gimme a break. It was a 6 hour exam so I have an excuse. I was busy prepping for it. Ugh, I'm glad I have my own computer. Now I don't have to write everything down, because my hand is far too sore from that exam to do any writing in a notebook. I apologize to those of you who were expecting a chapter a while ago. I told some of you I'd have it done in a matter of days and that didn't happen. I'm sorry. I should have thought about the whole exam thing. I actually had this finished yesterday and I forgot to upload it. I apologize. Anyway, I hope you guys like this chapter. R&R
