(( I apologize for the long wait. I was feeling a bit uninspired and I was also procrastinating. I'm also starting up another project/experiment or whatever you call it on youtube. Go see my profile for more details. Thanks for you patience everyone!))
Chapter 7 – The Outward Movement
"This place was rather familiar."
The bed took the shape of his body as he lay down. With combination of the incredibly soft blankets it seemed as if he was being cradled by a cloud. When he gazed up to the ceiling, he noticed a dozen of glowing plastic stars at the top. Neil noticed a familiar woman's voice coming from downstairs, sounding a lot like his mother's. The sweet scent of herbal tea comforted him, and the sound of her soft laughter caressed him. Neil hasn't felt this kind of peace in years. It was as if nothing in the universe could ever bother him, and the only thing that flowed free throw his mind, body, and spirit was everlasting peace, love, and comfort. It suddenly dawned on him that this was his childhood bedroom on Mindoir. What a wonderful childhood that was. Every day before mother put him to bed, his father took him out for stargazing. The night sky was so beautiful and glorious that showcased thousands if not millions of stars. Father told him that each little start that he saw could be full of exuberant life, and that one day when Neil was older he could indeed find a way to reach the stars and possibly have start his own little piece of life within this wonderful universe. Oh how right father was with that assessment indeed. Though, he probably wouldn't have guessed his son becoming a galactic hero who fell in love with a quarian pilgrim that he may have inadvertently helped turn into an admiral. That would have been quite a shocker for father and mother.
Unfortunately in this galaxy, there is no such thing as everlasting peace. He heard his mother give a deathly shriek and his father give out a grisly yelp. His bedroom caught on fire and was slowly disintegrating into the dreadful forest he always seems to get himself into. His body was violently yanked out of bed and dragged along the crooked wooden floors of his burning memories. His clothes were drenched in blood. If it was his own he didn't know, though the blood soaked wooden panels made it hard for him to dig his nails into the floor. Finally the force that was yanking him stopped, and at the end of the hallway was the boy from his nightmares holding hands with the one he once knew as Caleb Ronan. The apparitions stared back at him with a sorrowful expression. Both of them were victims of this terrible reaper war in their own ways. Neither of them truly deserved the fate that was bestowed upon them. The one truly depressing realization was that Neil could have saved both of them if he had done something different in the past.
The sound of the reaper horn blasted all of the doors and windows in the house. The pupils of the boy and Caleb slowly rolled upwards only revealing the whites of their eyes. All the while he heard the excruciating shrieks and pained screams of the billions he could have saved. He couldn't help but scream with them as well as his body was then yanked and slowly dragged towards the two ghastly figures. As he got closer, Caleb's apparition slowly turned into a huskified formation. Its "improved" body had cables and wires piercing inside and outside of its skin while it dripped of purple synthetic liquid. The Caleb abomination revealed its razor sharp teeth ready to sink into Shepard's skull all the while the boy simply stood and observed.
Then suddenly he heard shotgun blasts come from behind him that knocked the huskified Caleb apparition to the floor. The boy opened his mouth and let out an ear piercing shriek similar to a banshee's, but it too was silenced by another shotgun round to the forehead. Both apparitions began to disintegrate right before his eyes. Neil wondered who his savior could have been, but he soon had his answer as two arms that contained three digits on each palm slowly pulled him into a comforting embrace. He felt the same tranquility he had when this dream began, if not better. The white light from the sky put out the fires, and made all of the shrieks and shouts stop.
Neil was curled up in fetal position digging his head into Tali's chest. He was shivering violently and sweating profusely. Tali was trying to comfort him to the best of her abilities by pulling him into a strong hug and tapping her faceplate to the top of his forehead. He heard her softly murmur incoherently; though he was able to make out words like "nightmare over" and "okay." Neil looked absolutely pathetic as a galactic hero. This was supposed to be a time for triumph and standing tall over pile of scrap that was once the reapers. Though instead he looked like a broken down, traumatized middle aged man that was dependant on the comfort of a quarian admiral. The galaxy can't see him like this, especially in a time where suffering runs rampant through the minds of its inhabitants. They need to see a shining beacon of hope to fulfill their need of catharsis. Although having their hero survive and form a beautiful bond with Tali might be something, but seeing Shepard as someone who appears weathered down and emotionally broken will not instill hope and optimism within the mind.
Neil noticed that his eyes were incredibly moist. It seemed as if he was sobbing during his nightmare as well, and it had a devastating effect on Tali. Although she had her mask on she made it painfully clear that she was distraught to see her man like this. When Neil looked up at her she started cradling and caressing his head; trying her absolute best to repair the holes that punctured his very soul. She wrapped her arms around his neck and embraced him again.
"It's okay, Shepard." She whispered into his ear softly.
"Everything will be okay. I'm here with you now."
"I…had a, um." Neil said groggily before being cut off by Tali.
"A nightmare? I know Neil. I know a lot." She responded with a hint of sorrow in her voice.
She tapped her visor against his forehead again, and spoke in a more determined tone.
"I will break you free from those visions Neil, even if it takes me my entire life to do it."
Neil simply looked at Tali in awe as she moved one of her digits to wipe the tears flowing freely from his eyes; the same exact way Neil did for her just the night before. If he had any more energy than he had at that exact moment he would quickly removed Tali's faceplate and given her a huge kiss. However all he could do now is simply lean his head comfortably into her shoulder. He felt the hiss of air as Tali removed her faceplate and began to give Neil a series of slow and heart melting kisses on his forehead and then on his lips. If only his life were always like this. Neil told himself that if he had to do one more mission in his life, it was to pave the path for peace and prosperity for him and for her.
"So have they initiated a manhunt for Caleb yet?" Neil asked curiously.
"Yes. Major Coats proposed it and Admiral Hackett approved and initiated the hunt almost instantly."
"I'm guessing they know that the attack was mostly a message sent to me by Cerberus then huh?"
"They know you are alive, I know that much. But they are trying to wait for the right time to announce that you've survived the citadel explosion. People can't see you like…this." She frowned as she traced her finger along one of Neil's face bandages.
"But Tali, Garrus told me that I'll look more badass and attractive to you if I gained more scars." Neil whined playfully.
Tali responded with a deep sigh and a moment of silence.
"You are the most loveable idiot on the face of this universe."
"Dohoho now. You seemed to have changed me from 'galaxy's biggest idiot duo' with Garrus to the 'most loveable idiot on the face of this universe.' That is quite a leap there sweat heart."
"Think of it as a promotion." Tali responded playfully with a heartwarming smile. She then gave him several more passionate kisses on his lips and his cheeks.
Neil wrapped both of his arms around her waist and gladly returned the favor. He looked into Tali's eyes with so much warmth that it seemed to have melted her heart.
"I can't fathom how lucky I am to have you Tali." He said in a deep voice full of emotion.
"I am going to do so many wonderful things for you and this is only the beginning of it."
He thought then and there Tali would be all over him, and he'd have to call Garrus to put the 'do not disturb' sign up again. Though what she said next took him off balance.
"I'm going to kill Caleb, Shepard. If he is ever unfortunate enough to have me find him, I'm going to kill him." She said in a vengefully.
There were only a few times that he's witnessed Tali get angry, though it was never with such vengeful ire that she has right now. It was very understandable however, given what they've been through mere days ago.
"Seems like Garrus and Liara have some competition."
"The whole galaxy actually, Shepard. You'd be surprised on how many people have decided to take up arms and go looking for anyone with any Cerberus connections."
This made Neil frown.
"Caleb wanted something like this to happen, that crazy fucker."
"A shotgun a day will keep the baddies away.' Joker told that one to me, and from what I've experienced from the several years that I've known you now it's definitely true. I don't care if he claims to have the fanciest biotics in the galaxy. He will not hurt us or anyone else once my shotgun rounds pierce through his armor."
" I just can't believe how far he's fallen Tali. He was a really good man once."
"I know, Garrus told me that he was a close friend."
"Tali, you don't understand. He was…pretty much a mirror reflection of what I am. I'd bet that if he wasn't any different than what he was several years back, you'd think that we were brothers. I can kind of understand what happened to him."
"How so?"
Neil frowned and looked at Tali.
"Tali, he lost the people he loved in the most horrific way possible. He witnessed them becoming husks and he had to put down his daughter and his wife." He said with a whimper.
"Imagine if that happened to me. What would happen to me if I lost you like that?" The sheer thought made him shiver.
Tali was silent for a moment and deep in thought. That truly is a horrible way to lose the ones you loved the most. She almost began to sob just thinking about it. After a few minutes she was able to regain her composure.
"Remember how I lost my father, Neil? I used my grief to push me forward and help others. I didn't let his death change who I was. There are right ways in dealing with grief, and there are the absolute wrong ways to deal with grief. If what Caleb said to you was true, then that is possibly one of the most horrible things that can happen to someone. I wouldn't wish that on anyone. But he let their deaths change him for the worse. He suffered horribly, so therefore he thinks he should spread his suffering among others. It is entirely his fault that he let himself compromise who he once was and become a terrorist, rather than using that grief to prevent that from happening to other people or with people that have gone through something similar. He's gone in too deep and he will never come back around. Someone needs to stop him before he hurts us and others."
Neil simply acknowledged her speech with a sorrowful nod of agreement.
"Shepard, I am really sorry about what happened to your friend. But for the two of us it is simply another mountain that we can and will climb over."
He immediately responded by giving Tali another deep kiss on her lips.
"I'll take your word on that sweetheart."
Tali gave Neil one more kiss before putting her faceplate back on.
"Come on Shepard. Why don't we go walk around outside and show everyone those newly acquired 'badass and attractive' scars of yours?
