Disclaimer: I don't own 'em, I just torture 'em.
Warning: Smut, bad language ahead. You have been told...
Riza opened the door and glanced cautiously into the kitchen. She could here Al moving around in the next room, but Ed was not in sight. She quietly closed the door behind her and headed for the table. Al had left a plate for her, but she had lost her appetite. Riza poked around the kitchen for a few minutes, trying to work up the nerve to find Ed.
Should I tell him? I mean, it's probably not true, but if it is, he'll need to know. 'Oh, Ed, would you mind not coming near me for the next week? I know, I know, you need to examine me, but really, it's all good. What? You say you're going to examine me whether I like it or not? Ah, you should probably rephrase that…
Riza shivered at the thought of Ed ordering her to strip. Wait, there I go again! I must be losing my mind!
Ed, meanwhile, had grabbed his plate and headed upstairs to the bedroom he had chosen. He perched on the bed and nibbled, his mind going over everything that had happened in the garden.
Well, let's see. Riza molested me and tried to pull my pants off. She kissed me. Damn… Ed paused at the thought of the kiss. His lips curved into a silly little smile. Uh, wait, gotta figure out how to fix this. There must be a reason behind Riza's behavior. Frowning, Ed set his plate on the nightstand and flopped back on the bed. He let his feet dangle as he stared at the ceiling.
Okay. Riza is fused with a cat. What do I know about cats? Ed smirked, what did he know about cats? They're cute, contrary creatures that my brother can't seem to leave alone. But really, if the mind of the cat is interfering with Riza's normal thought process, what the hell am I going to do? If there is more than just a physical change, I'm not sure if the transmutation can be reversed without harming one or both of them. Maybe it's just some sort of biochemical thing. Hormones, or something. Ed bolted upright.
"Motherfucker!"
Ed looked at the door; if Al had heard him, he would be knocking in a moment. The moment passed. Al had not heard his older brother's foul language.
Good, because the last thing I need is to explain to him just why I was yelling that word. Fuck, there's no way that can be right. Even if it does explain everything. No. Can't be.
Ed got up and headed for the door. He needed to find Riza.
Riza walked into the living room and found Al reading a book. "Alphonse, I'm going to bed. I'll see you in the morning."
"Okay, Riza. Oh, did Ed upset you, or something? He came in and headed straight to his room. He usually only does that when he feels guilty about something."
Riza shook her head. "No, we just talked." And kissed…
"All right. If you need anything, I'll be in the bedroom at the end of the hall. Ed got the room across from yours."
Riza smiled. "Thank you, Al."
"Good night, Riza."
Al returned to his book, and Riza walked towards the stairs. She yawned as she slowly climbed them. I won't think about anything else tonight. I'll just go to bed, and when I get up in the morning, I'll figure out a way to talk to Ed.
Riza reached her door, and whirled around. Ed stood behind her, his hand raised as if he was going to grab her arm. "Ed…"
Ed looked at Riza, there was a strange gleam in his eyes. "Come on, we need to talk. And I mean talk."
Riza blinked. She had never heard Ed sound like that.
Ed grabbed Riza's arm and pulled her towards his bedroom door. He gently shoved her inside, and closed the door behind him. Riza heard a soft 'clap', and the door appeared to seal itself shut. He locked us in? With alchemy? Why?
Ed turned around and walked to the bed. He perched on the edge and glared up at Riza. "So, who's the father? Is it Mustang?" Ed frowned. "Probably is, that womanizing bastard…"
"What the hell are you talking about?" For some reason, Riza couldn't quite connect the dots. She had a suspicion that she didn't really want to.
Ed seemed to grow even angrier. "You know exactly what the hell I'm talking about!"
Riza felt her own anger begin to boil. "No, I don't, Ed. Your logic seems to be short something. Like a point." Riza could see the veins pop on Ed's neck.
"YOU ARE PREGNANT, DAMMIT! AND I'LL BET AN INCOMPLETE PHLOSOPHER'S STONE THAT MUSTANG IS THE FATHER! "
Riza's mouth fell opened. Where the fuck did he get this idea from!
Ed glared at her, his eyes like molten gold. "Well? Are you going to tell me? It's kind of obvious. You seem to be having some sort of hormonal thing going on, otherwise I don't think you'd be trying to shove your hand down my pants. And everyone knows you have a thing for Mustang." Ed rolled his eyes in disgust. "I don't know why."
Riza blinked, and began to growl. "You fucking little prick! I'm NOT pregnant! And even if I did have a thing for Roy, it's none of your goddamn business! Oh, and those hormonal surges? They're because I'm going into heat! I mean, you're cute, Ed, but I prefer," Riza gave an evil-sounding purr, "taller men, if you understand me."
Ed was relieved at first, and then, when Riza's words sank in, he saw red. A brilliant, blinding, shade of scarlet. Which was the only reason for his next action. Ed walked over to Riza and yanked her against him. His voice growled low, "I am not short. In any way." And then, shoving Riza back against the door, Ed kissed her. He grabbed her shirt and tugged it away from her breasts. Riza tried to squirm away, but Ed just shoved harder against her. He kissed her again, this time almost hurting her, before lowering his mouth to her breasts.
Ed licked the top of her left breast. Riza gasped and grabbed at Ed's shoulders. She tried to push him away, but lost her thoughts when his mouth covered her nipple and began to gently suck. Ed gently bit and scraped at Riza's nipple, causing her to whimper. Ed released her nipple and grabbed Riza's waist. He shoved her to her knees and then knelt in front of her. Riza caught Ed's face and kissed him, her hands grabbing at his shirt. Ed broke away from Riza long enough to pull her shirt over her head, then grabbed her for another kiss. Riza moaned into his mouth, and Ed slipped his fingers into the waist of her pajama pants. He stroked the skin along her hip, and was about to slide his hand into the waistband of her panties when someone banged on the sealed door.
"ED! What are you doing? I could hear you and Riza yelling! Are you two fighting? Open the door, or I'll open it!"
Ed jerked away from Riza. She sat on the floor for a moment longer, before looking for her shirt. How did it get all the way across the room? Oh, no, Al CANNOT see this! Riza looked at Ed.
"Well, what are you going to do now?"
Ed turned his head to look at Riza. "I don't know."
Al's fist banged against the door. "ED!"
Ed paled. "Uh, it's okay, Al." He glanced at Riza. She still sat on the floor, holding her shirt in front of her breasts. "Riza! Put your shirt on!" Ed half whispered, half hissed at the older woman.
"Ed, is Riza okay? Open the door!"
Riza struggled to pull her shirt over her head. Ed let out an exasperated sigh and reached over to help her pull her arms through. Once Riza's shirt was fixed, Ed turned back to the door.
"Okay, Al." Ed clapped his hands, and opened the door.
Al charged into the room, looking for Riza. "What happened? I just heard your voices, and you both seemed very angry. What were you fighting about?"
He didn't hear what we said? Oh, thank god for bad acoustics. Riza looked at the floor, it was the safest place. "We, ah, just had a disagreement. But everything's fine, Al. We worked things out." Ed worked things out with his tongue…When did he pick that up?
Ed nodded. "Sorry to worry you, Al. But I was worried Riza might leave before we were done talking." And then I didn't want her to leave, so you see, well actually you don't…
Al looked at Ed. He looked at Riza. "Riza, it's okay. If you don't want Ed to look at your tail right now, just tell him. You both need to sleep, anyway. How about you let this wait until tomorrow?"
Ed nodded. "Yeah, I guess we should." He looked at Riza, who blushed. "Riza, is that okay with you?"
Riza almost choked. "Sure." Oh, you little…I'll get you. Make me that hot and then act all innocent in front of your brother! What the hell am I saying? If Al found out…
"Okay, everybody go to bed." Al turned and walked from the room, leaving two very nervous individuals behind him.
Ed, you better not let Winry know that you kissed Riza. What's left won't need automail. Al chuckled as he headed down the hallway.
Author's notes: Sorry, I meant to get this up Thursday, but I got stuck working an extra shift, and then I just didn't get another chance. Was it worth the wait? Review, people. I mean it! Unless you don't want to. Next time: Ed and Riza talk without jumping on each other. At least for the first four paragraphs…
