Chapter 8 - ANBU - Age 18

(In the spring - Age 18 - ANBU)

They passed through the gates and Sasuke's eyes flickered to Sakura's half-turned frame. "We'll be back in time."

Sakura's brow drew together as she looked back at Naruto and waved at him. He remained behind in Konoha with his latest genin team who were horsing around behind him.

"We won't miss your birthday party; Ino would have our guts for garters," chuckled Kiba.

Sakura shook her head. "No, it's not that."

"Then what?" asked Kakashi. They were paired with a pair of Jounin teams as they travelled to a missing nin gang's new base of operations. Another pair of ANBU teams was already on location, scouting and gathering intelligence. Itachi had been sent along ahead of them to lead the reconnaissance.

She shook her head and gave him a false smile that creased her eyes shut, hiding them from him. "Nothing."

"Did you forget something?" He glanced down at the ground, where several of his ninken followed at his heels. "I can ask one to nip back for it."

"Never mind, just a feeling."

Kakashi nodded, before glancing down at Pakkun. The little pug gave a small snuff before trotting ahead of Kakashi and falling into step beside Sakura. He watched her shoulders calm down as she and the pug exchanged a few civilities and her posture relaxed. That night, Pakkun stayed beside her during her watch and also as she slept.

"I know what you're doing," she said softly to Kakashi as they packed up their bedrolls the next morning.

"Hm?"

She grinned up at him, then gave him a quick peck on the cheek, mask to mask. "Stop worrying, I'm fine."

"I didn't do anything."

"Mm-hmm. And Pakkun just accidentally, of his own initiative, cuddled up beside me to sleep."

"He must be quite comfortable with you."

Sakura laughed at his casual manner and reached up to ruffle his hair.

"It wasn't the first time," she admitted. She paused in her ruffling and withdrew her hand. "Sorry, force of habit."

"I don't mind," he said honestly, still bent over his pack. He turned to look at her and swallowed when he realized how close she was. Their gazes held as he stood up.

He now towered several inches over her. Her brow creased as she smiled at him.

"When did you get so tall?" She laughed at herself, shaking her head.

His gaze softened as he leaned forward a little, hands in his pockets.

"When I grew up." He met her gaze again. "I've always been right in front of you. All you need to do is look at me, and see me here."

Sakura's eyes widened as she paused at his words.

He watched her jaw moving behind her face mask. His heart speed up its pace as he waited for her reply.

"Moving out. Kakashi, take point with your ninken. Eyes open," called Sasuke.

Straightening, Kakashi nodded at Sakura, giving her an eye-crease smile. "Later."

"Later," she repeated back, watching him jog off, fresh pack firmly strapped to his muscled back. With a short whistle his ninken had assembled around his heels and he gave a subtle hand signal that sent them shooting for the outskirts of the group, into the brush.

"Is your baby all grown up?" teased Kiba, coming from behind Sakura.

Blushing, Sakura turned and gave him a look. Then shifted her weight as she strapped on her own well-worn pack.

"I… yeah, he did," she murmured to herself.

She couldn't help glancing at his strong, broad back as he moved further away from her. Now, he led their team forward. Something about this sight caught in her heart, a tiny, furious, wild tempest inside her that spun before it settled; something small but significant that she couldn't pin down.

He had grown up.

Her little Kakashi was an adult.


Ever attentive, Kakashi looked around the bar at their inn in Snow.

"Itachi's briefing the team leads upstairs to get them caught up," said Kiba, noting Kakashi's wandering eyes. "Sakura, Shika and Sasuke went up."

"Sasuke? He went straight back to his room," said Shikamaru from behind Kiba, joining them. He pulled out a chair and turned it around, straddling it and reaching for the dinner rolls in the middle of the table.

"The meeting's over?" asked Kakashi, while Shika nodded.

"Oh, did he have any supper?" asked Hinata. "Did Sakura?"

A moment ticked by after Shikamaru gave a noncommittal grunt.

Kakashi shrugged.

"I'll go ask," he said. He collected the basket of rolls from Kiba's table, swiping them from right under Kiba's outstretched hand, and set off.


Shikamaru left the room, Sasuke following him. Behind them, Sasuke heard Sakura make a small, querying noise in the back of her throat. When he glanced back he saw Itachi touching Sakura's elbow. He took in the way his brother leaned into Sakura's personal space, crowding her closer to the wall, one of his feet silently slipping between hers.

Sakura's meaningful stare into Sasuke's soul told him all he needed to know.

Turning back around, he took a step back into the room, lightly touching his temple.

"Sasuke, your eyes. Do you have a headache?" Sakura burst out before swallowing.

Sasuke looked between her pleading eyes and his brother's Stygian ones and knew he would not be a welcome third wheel. Sakura had been his teammate for years, however and perhaps if Sasuke could just intervene for a few minutes it would dissuade Itachi from...

But it was then that Itachi's Sharingan flickered and his grip on Sakura's door tightened, his arm blocking Sakura from Sasuke's view. Before Sasuke's eyes, Itachi's expression tightened and his gaze shifted, becoming deceptively aloof. But Sasuke recognized well his brother's predatory awareness.

Guilt and shame riddled him like a barrage of kunai, but Sasuke knew he would not win this round. Not with Sakura in such close quarters.

"I'm going to rest for a bit before I join them," he replied evenly. "I'll stop by later if it hasn't gone away."

"Rest well," said Itachi, preventing Sakura from speaking further.

Sasuke understood the dismissal for what it was. With a silent nod to his teammate he left, noticing it was his brother blocking her in and who closed the door behind him, not Sakura.

An ugly feeling settled low in his stomach as Sasuke turned his back on his friend.

Swallowing his water in his room at the inn a short time later, Sasuke was dutifully ignoring the rhythmic banging on the wall opposite his own bed when a new chakra signature arrived outside his door. The noise from his neighbour's room continued unabated. It was Sakura's room.

To Sasuke's knowledge—and senses—Itachi had not left it yet.

Beyond a shadow of a doubt, Sasuke did not want to interrupt what was happening behind Sakura's closed door.

However, Sasuke sensed the newcomer's approach then pause in front of the room next to his. He heard the knocking on her door, accompanying the banging on the wall and desperately ignored it.

The rhythmic banging continued and escalated, however, much to Sasuke's discomfort… until it was followed by an even more uncomfortably meaningful set of wanton cries that made him want to roll his eyes and plug his ears with cotton.

Then he paused.

His mouth went dry.

Wait. He recognized that new chakra signature.

But, that was Sakura's room—which meant that outside her room had been—

Jumping to his feet, Sasuke leapt to his door and checked the corridor.

On the worn carpet floor lay a tipped-over bread basket, its pastries still rolling away.

Sasuke sighed, frowning.

The guilt needled at his insides more than ever.


Later that night, Sasuke waited in his brother's room, arms crossed.

"You could have knocked, I would have answered," said Itachi as he crossed the threshold, closing the door behind him.

Sasuke just looked at his brother.

"That's what you wanted him to do."

"Hn?"

"Don't take advantage of her to get to him."

Itachi stilled and blinked slowly at his brother.

"This is none of your concern."

"It is when it affects my teams. Tomorrow we're on point and I need to know I can trust him to watch not only my back, but yours."

"I have no need of his attention or support."

Sasuke pushed away from the wall.

"But she will."

With that he pushed past Itachi, barely restraining the urge to slam the door behind him.


He'd been afraid of this.

The next day, Sasuke sighed as Kakashi avoided him again by ducking into the trees to 'scout ahead'.

As if his ninken may have missed something.

With a glance at Kiba, Sasuke nodded that he was taking off. Kiba looked in Sakura's direction, then towards the forest where Kakashi had disappeared. He gave a nod before taking point.

"Hn," admonished the Uchiha when he caught up to Kakashi. Kakashi gave him a bored glare before ignoring him.

"You should get back to everyone," said Kakashi, leaping over another branch.

"You first."

Charcoal eye staring straight ahead, Kakashi ignored him.

Sasuke tried again.

"She doesn't know why you're avoiding her."

Kakashi was silent.

"We're all adults."

Kakashi's eyes narrowed, but still he leapt further, faster, longer.

In a moment of frustration, Sasuke poured on speed and darted in front of Kakashi, forcing him to a halt. Breathing hard, both men glared at each other.

"Are you mad at her?"

"No." Kakashi looked away.

"Are you disappointed in her?"

Kakashi looked away.

"It's not that simple."

Sasuke's brow arched.

"Explain."

When Kakashi grumbled low under his breath, and turned away, Sasuke nearly rolled his eyes.

"Speak up."

"I said, he didn't do it for her, he did it to me!" Kakashi's dark eyes blazed at Sasuke as he whirled on him. "He used her and he did it to get at me."

Sasuke took a deep breath, letting it out slowly.

Kakashi's bluster wore out almost immediately as his shoulders slumped.

"Your brother's… not the man I thought he was."

With that admission Sasuke felt a moment of true kinship with Kakashi.

"Welcome to the Rare People Who Understand Itachi is a Mere Mortal club. Membership: Three."

Kakashi's brows rose as Sasuke's smirk held a rueful sadness to it. He looked at Kakashi in a 'whatcha gonna do'-way.

"He did. You're right." He folded his arms across his chest. "I will neither deny that nor defend him."

Kakashi watched Sasuke before he looked away. His hands were clenched in loose fists at his sides, flexing and relaxing at uneven intervals.

Sasuke's eyes narrowed. While he was leading his team he could risk no insubordination. Furthermore, he couldn't risk Kakashi getting distracted. Deciding on a bit of 'tough love', Sasuke stepped in front of Kakashi again.

"He disappointed you. He hurt you. He used Sakura. And? Sakura consented. What happened between them was none of our business. We have a mission. Now, what will you do about it? Avoid her? Ignore his orders? You're a better shinobi than that, Kakashi."

Kakashi scoffed at Sasuke and turned to leave. Sasuke grabbed his sleeve.

"Sakura taught you better."

Kakashi tugged his arm free.

"So did he."


There was a small confrontation as they reached their target base camp.

Unfortunately, it wasn't with enemy nin… exactly.

Kakashi's ears burned as he walked away from a chuckling Kiba and a sympathetic Hinata.

And a frustratingly aloof Uchiha Itachi.

"Kakashi," began Hinata as she gently approached him.

He turned away, the back of his neck flaming.


"—over there, tents over there, mess over there," pointed the ANBU when they arrived at the camp. "We have traps set out around the perimeter, along with some genjutsu. The genjutsu's a little subtle, but it's there. Nothing too scary," he chuckled. "But they assured us it would stop anyone in their tracks."

"Courtesy Uchiha-Taichou?" asked Sakura, surmising who had cast the genjutsu.

"Yes," said the ANBU. "However, as we've mentioned it and you know to keep an eye out for it, we doubt anyone will walk into it. This is a very seasoned team."

Noting the traps and making a note to copy some of the fun ones, Kakashi followed the rest of his team and went to set up his cot.

It was less than an hour later that Itachi collected him and several others.

"Perimeter sweep; learn the boundaries, familiarize yourselves with them and their traps," Itachi advised and dispatched them.

With a nod, Kakashi disappeared from sight, off to survey the northern corner.


One genjutsu, two genjutsu, three genjutsu, four, sighed Kakashi. Five genjutsu, six genjutsu, seven genjutsu more…

Fine, there hadn't been that many, but they were fairly obvious as he knew to look for them, he thought. This tour was disappointingly boring at this point.

He leapt from branch to branch before hearing a river nearby and deciding he could do with a quick splash over his arms and head after the long run. A quick scan of the area confirmed it was clear and he landed on soft feet on an outcropping of tree root, keeping close to the brush to maintain cover. He had just rinsed himself off when he heard breathing from behind him.

In an instant he'd flipped out his kunai and let it fly from his fingers, only to hear an embarrassed sigh.

"Sorry," said Sakura, knocking his kunai off course before collecting it and returning it to him. "I was waiting for you to finish so we could walk back together. Mind if I wash up quick, too?"

He shuffled a bit to the side, letting her through.

"Hey," she said, nudging his shoulder with hers and smiling at him. "Did I ever say thank you for keeping Genma off my back?"

"I didn't do anything," said Kakashi, sitting on his haunches as he dried out.

Sakura poked him in the shoulder, laughing. "Uh huh. And he just happened to suddenly become a respectful lecher towards me."

She shook her head.

Kakashi's eye crinkled as he forced a smile behind his mask.

"Has he stepped out of line at all?"

"Easy on the killing intent," said Sakura, eyes widening. "And no, he's been fine lately."

A small blush warming his cheeks, Kakashi coughed and cooled himself off by dipping his hands in the water again. But as he leaned forward it occurred to him that he was exposing the back of his burning neck to Sakura, and he fought the urge to sink into the river bank.

"What's up?" she asked, softening her voice.

"Hm? Nothing."

She took his hand and pulled him around, surprising him with her directness.

"You can talk to me, Kakashi. No matter what," she said, viridian eyes wide and earnest.

He struggled to swallow, his lips working but no sound coming out.

"Kakashi?" she asked, leaning closer.

His thoughts scrambled, Kakashi shook his head.

—and suddenly felt a pinch in the side of his neck.

He saw Sakura's eyes widen as he reached for him and tugged a dart out. Then everything went dark.


"...ashi….Kakashi… come on back now," came Sakura's voice, cajoling him from the cocoon of darkness that enfolded him in its warmth and comfort. "Naptime's over."

"Hm?" he asked, shaking his head and rubbing at his eyes.

His skin was thicker and rough; his hand larger. His back was stiffer, and felt heavier, too. What kind of poison had they hit him with?

And yet, he felt safe, secure.

Confused, Kakashi opened his eyes and nearly fell off the… warm, soft… couch?

"Hey sleepyhead," he heard her murmur, and then felt Sakura's fingers sweeping his bangs off his face before curling behind his ear. "I need to go feed her. Could I get up, please?" she asked, teasing.

From the angle she hung over him, Kakashi realized in a flash that he was resting his head in her lap.

And then he heard the restless stirrings of an infant from very close by.

His heart stopped in his chest as he shot up and looked around.

His family home, but not his family home. The same rooms, but now brighter… more colourful. The children's toys and wood training kunai lying about; the yellow starred baby sock hanging on the side of the couch. The scent of baby powder, zinc oxide and mother's milk.

He turned to stare at Sakura, as his heart began pounding in his chest once more, too hard, strong and steady to be normal. He recognized a throw from Sakura's apartment over the back of the couch; her favourite mug on the coffee table in front of them. A stack of freshly dried laundry, ready to be folded, was piled high by the end of the hallway in a basket he recognized from her old apartment.

His ninken were sprawled across each other, snoring in a patch of late afternoon sunlight that streamed through the picture window. A clock ticked in the background. Outside the leaves were changing from green to gold and orange, and he felt the wind blowing a gentle breeze to ruffle his longer, wild hair.

From her seat on the couch Sakura smiled at him, her eyes faintly lined and expression soft.

"Did I wake you from a good dream? You were down for the count." She arched her back and stretched before standing and it was then he noticed how much fuller her chest looked, how her hips were wider, how much she glowed. "I'll be right back. Let me grab your voracious daughter and we'll settle in for her afternoon feed together, okay? Oh, could you grab supper from the freezer? The boys will be back from the Academy soon and you know how they're always famished after racing each other home."

She was already up and moving towards the baby—our daughter, his mind prodded him—when he nodded, on autopilot, and walked to the kitchen. Older, he realized. He wasn't just tired, he felt… older.

But when Sakura returned, their little snow-haired Suzumu nestled in her arms and rooting around Sakura's chest with hungry grumbles, his heart melted and all his doubts settled.

"Did you find it okay?" Sakura asked, unbuttoning her shirt and scooping Suzu into position with practiced ease. "Easy, you little goober," she said, nuzzling her daughter as she latched on. "You'd think we'd been depriving you," she murmured, grinning. "Greedy little one. There you go."

Still on autopilot, Kakashi had opened the fridge and walked over with a pitcher of water, already refilling her mug. Sakura smiled up at him.

"Thanks," she said, and accepted the cup from him.

He nodded. "The casserole for supper?"

"Yep. Oh, could you put some extra vegetables on?"

He settled a kiss on her forehead and nuzzled his wife.

"If I cook extra, do I get a belly rub later?" he murmured in a husky voice, rubbing his cheek against hers.

Sakura laughed, cupping the side of his scruffy face. "You're relentless. We'll end up with four soon."

"Mmmm-hmmm," he murmured, unrepentant.

"We'll see about you possibly receiving 'flowers' later," Sakura said, and delighted Kakashi when she blushed.

With a quick jutsu he corralled several clones to prepare the veg and went to snuggle his head back into Sakura's lap, supporting her elbow as she nursed their precious Suzumu.

With a happy sigh, Kakashi closed his eyes and let himself drift in happiness. Everything. He had everything he'd ever wished for.

Life was perfect.


"... ashi… Kakashi?... Come back to me, come on…"

"Any sign yet?"

"... no, not yet… better get Taichou…"

General rumbling and dissenting noise. Kakashi ignored them, happily cradled in Sakura's warm lap. In fact, whoever they were they could go take a long walk off a short pier. He was busy.

With a murmured, "Leave me 'n m'wife alone,", he turned onto his side and buried his face in Sakura's stomach.

"Need more babies," he mumbled around a yawn, reaching his arms around Sakura and pulling her closer. "Suzumu needs to be a big sister."

There was a strange pause when Sakura's voice was somewhat strangled.

"Kakashi?"

"Hmmmm?" he hummed happily, snuggling closer.

Her swallow was audible.

"Wh-who are you married to?"

"Hn. You. Who else? Are the boys back?" He pressed his nose into her firm tummy and lipped at her shirt. "We can get started on number four."

He heard her swallow.

"Uh…"

The sounds of the forest surrounding them slowly cut through Kakashi's dreamstate and he felt the different breezes rushing over him, strong enough to ruffle his shirt and vest, not just his hair. Birds chirping and cawing around them, leaves rustling, the river coursing down past the bank he'd been crouched beside, washing up… before the dart caught him. His hip was dug into the rough, dirty forest floor.

It hadn't been a dart, he realized.

Genjutsu.

Kakashi's eyes shot open and up; her eyes wide, her face pale, Sakura peered down at him while wearing her Jounin uniform.

"Kakashi? Can you hear me?" she asked, voice thready.

In mounting horror he could only stare as she hunched over him, teasing his hair from his face. She cradled his head in her lap, one hand glowing and monitoring his vital signs. The sun was dipping low and cast shadows around them. He had been out for quite some time, it seemed.

"Kakashi, who… where are you?" she asked, her face concerned.

He couldn't speak. He couldn't.

Sakura wet her lips, her eyes turning down in the corners. She glanced up at Hinata beside her, shaking her head. "Better get Taichou. He's not coming out."

Hinata nodded and hurried away.

Taichou?—Itachi.

His embarrassment and anger flared in unison.

Itachi had sent him to this quadrant specifically, Kakashi remembered.

The entire mission, Itachi had been goading him, Kakashi realized next. And Itachi had cast such a subtle genjutsu that even when Kakashi had been looking for it he'd stepped into the middle of it. The Uchiha knew him better than he realized, Kakashi thought, furious with himself.

And that was how Itachi had known exactly how to capture him; by giving him exactly what he wanted most. By showing him an illusion that he could never hope to achieve; equality with Sakura.

He would never be the same age as her.

He would never see her cup in his home.

He would never hold their daughter together.

This illusion was devastating in its accuracy; and it showed him exactly what the Uchiha could do to him.

Because Kakashi understood now that what he'd seen was exactly what he and Itachi had in common: the desire for peace, safety, and Sakura's loving arms to come home to.

And then Itachi had taken it away… the same way he would take Sakura away from him.

"Report, Haruno," commanded Itachi, entering the small clearing where Kakashi now sat with a whirling mind, surrounded by his colleagues.

"He fell under the genjutsu, Taichou," said Sakura, the lines around her face tight with concern.

"Status?"

"Kakashi—"

He hates me.

Itachi absolutely hates me, Kakashi realized, stunned.

Sakura continued a brief report to Itachi, but Kakashi could focus on nothing but the unfortunate truth. He may not have liked Itachi for some time, but it was sobering to find out his mentor abhorred him to such an extent as to publicly humiliate him. While on a mission, at that. How… how frustrated did one have to be to go so far as to do so? Why? Why now?

Kakashi looked away. He wasn't sure what to think.

"Nothing to worry about," he said, rising to his feet and giving his feet a shake. "I fell asleep."

"Helluva dream," snickered Kiba from nearby. "Only you would dream about being married like it's a good thing, Hatake," laughed Kiba. Beside him, Hinata glared at her teammate before turning wide eyes on Kakashi.

"Kakashi-kun, do you feel all right? You weren't easy to wake up," she said softly. Her violet eyes were focused on him with compassion and pity.

He turned away from her, nodding vaguely.

"All good!" he said, rubbing the back of his head. It kept his hands from reaching for his kunai and going for Itachi's throat.

Beside Kakashi, Sakura also nodded and got to her feet. She lifted a glowing hand to his head.

"Your vitals were clean, but you didn't want to give up whatever you… saw," she said, hesitation in her words. Felt, she implied.

The wind picked up further, blowing leaves and bits of debris around them. Kakashi relished its sobering feel. His fists clenching for a second at his side, he swallowed and turned to give her an eye-crease smile.

"All fine. I had a good nap. Did I miss any excitement?"

Itachi looked between Kakashi and Sakura.

"Haruno, is he cleared to return to duty or does he need to return to Konoha?"

Don't let him do this to you! Kakashi caught himself before he snarled at Itachi. He was not unfit for duty; there was no way Itachi was getting rid of him this way. He felt a tingle of Sakura's chakra shoot through him and saw the warning look in her hard green eyes.

Her shoulders straightening, Sakura lowered her hand, no longer glowing, and shook her head subtly, eyeing him as she faced Itachi.

"He is neither delirious nor unstable. He is fine to return to duty, sir."

Kakashi hid his surprise by turning to face Itachi full-on; the Uchiha regarded him with cold, inky eyes.

"Advise me of any change in his condition at once. We cannot risk the success of the team or mission."

"Yes, sir," said Sakura, giving a short bow.

"The rest of you, return to your posts," ordered Itachi, turning and returning to the camp.

As the crowds departed Kakashi felt tingling through his body. Sakura had touched his back and clenched her hand in his vest a moment, stalling him.

"Kakashi," she said, swallowing, but he tugged away from her.

"I was disoriented from the genjutsu," he said, cutting her off before she could begin. "It's nothing."

"It didn't sound like nothing," she said quietly as he stepped away.

"Forget it," he said, reaching down to collect the weapons she'd stripped off him earlier. "Thank you for your help," he added, more gruffly than he intended. He cursed himself a hundred times over. Don't take it out on her; she did nothing wrong.

Her bleak voice was a lash across his back.

"Anytime," said Sakura, watching him go. "I can speak to the others if you—"

"Just stop it! You aren't my sensei anymore!" he snapped before he could help himself.

The silence between them chilled the air. The birds and animals scattered and left Kakashi with his fists shaking.

Humiliated, he stalked off so as not to dig his grave deeper.

Feeling like a heel of the most assholish kind, Kakashi refused to splash any more damn water on his face to cool his burning cheeks when he passed the riverbank. Instead he took to the trees to continue his perimeter check. There was work to be done.

And there was much to be considered.


Several days later, as the group returned to Konoha, he felt her approach and put on more speed again.

From behind him he heard a small huff before her chakra signature vanished from his senses. At first distracted by her sudden disappearance, he almost turned to look for her… until his entire ninken pack suddenly veered off wildly into the forest.

Then he heard them yipping with excitement and his brow furrowed.

Ah.

Sighing internally, he considered continuing on but thought better of it. It was just as well to get it out of the way now.

"You're a dirty cheater, Sakura," he said when he reached her. She was perched on a tree root with his pack around her, bellies up and begging for tummy rubs. Their favourite treats were scattered here and there—or, rather, their crumbs were.

"I don't suppose now would be a good time for me to apologize?"

Kakashi's ears burned at her words.

"You don't need to apologize for anything."

"I hadn't realized it would come across… the way it did."

He nodded. "Don't worry about it."

She sighed and her shoulders fell, her hand absently reaching down to pet one of his traitorous ninken.

"I should have… anyway. I cleared it up with everyone for you."

Could she leave no facet of his masculinity intact? Kakashi wanted to bury himself under the earth and never surface again.

"I'm not sure what happened when you tripped into that genjutsu, but Itachi isn't the type to gossip. Sorry, I should have warned you it was set up closer to the camp. I'm...so sorry. I just couldn't believe you didn't realize it was there."

Kakashi nodded.

"It wasn't bad. Just a little disorienting." Being an ANBU and caught in such an elementary jutsu? It was mortifying. And in front of everyone on both teams for the mission?

How Itachi had lured him to it, he was still trying to figure it out. But he knew he had.

Kakashi wasn't ready to rule out witchcraft when it came to Itachi.

"Are you okay?"

He gave her a false smile through his mask as she searched his eyes.

"All good!"

When his eye uncreased he saw her confident compassion sliding, replaced with concern.

"I'll speak to him," she said, standing to go.

He wanted to swear. "No, it's—"

She waved him off.

"I'm not sure what happened between you two, but he's been acting strange for ages around you. At first I thought he was hitting on you, but—"

Kakashi paled and felt the world tilt the wrong way for a second. He casually stretched his arm to grab the tree, trying to regain his balance.

"—but then I didn't think you really went for men. But I could be wrong, and if so, I'm really sorry. And also, I think your friend Iruka has been eyeing you up, but you didn't hear that from me—"

"Wait, you… there's a lot that happened in that breath." He speared his silver hair with his fingers and barely withheld the urge to yank on it. Instead he took a break and sat down on the root Sakura had vacated. "Hold on," he said, lifting a hand.

Sakura glanced over her shoulder before she straightened, her viridian eyes wide.

"Are you alright?" Her palms were already glowing as she turned back to him.

Oh, how he was tempted. Tempted to lean into her touch. Tempted to release the tree and instead…

Instead he was left fighting to not embarrass himself further.

He closed his eyes as she neared, felt the flare of her chakra as she brought her hands to touch him, one at his temple, spearing his hair with her dexterous, capable fingers, the other over his heart.

With supreme force of will he pulled away, shaking his head. Not like this. Not under false pretenses.

Her hand dropped from his chest.

"You didn't know Itachi was bisexual?" Sakura's healing chakra faded. Her fingers stroked his temple absently.

"No."

"You didn't know Iruka had a thing for you?"

Suspected, but ignored. Well, maybe exploited. A little.

"He's not my type."

He heard her huff of laughter under her breath.

"You have a way with men, Kakashi."

He sighed. Her fingers felt like magic against his tense scalp. Unconsciously he leaned into her.

"Don't remind me."

"Still no luck finding the woman of your dreams?"

"She's out there," he said.

"Lucky girl."

He could hear her smiling, yet something in her voice sounded almost… wistful.

He opened his eyes to find her staring into his; her hand had slowed to light caress in his stubborn hair.

Their gaze held.

His jaw tensed when he saw Sakura swallow, the parting of her lips.

Then, as he was lifting his hand, he heard the low, warning growl from his pack.

Without warning he threw himself forward, grabbing Sakura and propelling her to the side, covering her with his larger body.

However, even before he heard the spray of senbon pepper the ground and tree where they'd been a split-second earlier, he felt his own back hit the ground and skid across the forest floor.

An eerily familiar sense of wrongness filled him as he felt Sakura, now so much smaller compared to him, compared to so many years ago, shuddering as her body shielded him from a barrage of kunai after she had flipped them in mid-air.

For a second he couldn't breathe; all he could see were her green, green eyes, wide and fierce and… relieved.

"You're okay?" She gasped, one of her hands glowing and running some kind of diagnostic when her back must look like a pin-cushion.

Again.

For him.

Again.

Unthinking, Kakashi wrapped his arms around Sakura and leapt blindly, aiming for whatever branch or stone would lend them the most cover.

He scanned the canopy as the branches blurred past.

"I'm fine. Heal yourself."

"They could be poisonous—"

"Which is why you should heal yourself."

He uncovered his Sharingan and swept the forest, quickly locating the four-man squad who'd stalked them. With a flurry of furiously calm hand signals he'd summoned his pack and sent them out with their orders, with two remaining at Sakura's side.

"Protect her."

Her eyes narrowed at him; he didn't fail to notice the haze that dimmed her focus.

"I don't need—"

"Bite her if you need to."

"Yes, boss."

Sakura glared at the dog and would have pouted, had the situation been less serious. Meanwhile, Kakashi had already caught two of the enemy in a genjutsu and had flashed away to start on the others…

It didn't take long. He didn't bother keeping any of it non-lethal or merciful.

Again. It echoed through his memory, the scenes of his childhood, his all encompassing fear from that old messenger mission, surfacing and clawing him raw inside.

No. Not again.

His Sharingan whirled and the pain stabbed through his head. He grabbed the next nin by the scruff of her neck. He threw her against a pile of boulders, hard enough to snap the woman's spine. She cried out; he didn't stop. Driving his hand through her chest, he channelled lightning through her as she screamed. The scent of charred skin rose to his nose and he ignored it, ignored her shaking and writhing and begging.

What a worthless kunoichi.

When she flopped, limp, he turned to the last nin whose hands now shook with his second rate kunai. He took a step back when Kakashi stood an inch taller and straightened his shoulders, focusing on him with deadly fury.

Never again.

Behind them the two nin caught in the genjutsu had begun screaming screaming screaming and didn't stop. After all, he was Uchiha Itachi's student in more than kendo. This would be the only time these nin would be taught this lesson.

When the last enemy dropped dead at his feet, his throat slit, Kakashi rushed back to Sakura only to find her staring at him, mouth a little open, and a tear sliding down her cheek.

His Sharingan spun wildly, capturing the image of her kneeling and bloody, her anguish raw.

The screaming behind them croaked to a gasping, gurgling end as the nin committed suicide to escape his ruthless genjutsu torture.

"... what have I done?" He heard Sakura whisper.

Kakashi looked around. He'd eliminated the threat. He'd protected her. His ninken were providing sentry support while another had gone to fetch Sasuke for back-up. They were safe. She had had plenty of opportunity to heal herself.

What had he done wrong?

Why was she looking at him like that?

"Oh kami, what did I do?" More tears ran down her face as she struggled to her feet and stepped unsteadily towards him… and hesitated.

For the first time she didn't raise her arms to welcome him, to heal him.

Her lips quivered and she pressed them together.

Kakashi's brow knit, and he took a step closer to her. He paused when Sakura swallowed and hesitated, as if she was about to take a step back.

Her eyes were on his hands; his bloody, murderous hands.

His mouth felt like cotton.

"It's not my blood."

It was the first thing that came to mind.

It was the wrong thing to say.

"I know," was all Sakura replied. She lacked any and all emotion.

She glanced around the wreckage of their small forest clearing before stumbling back in the direction the rest of their team had gone in. Someone would be looking for them soon; this had taken too long to be a short heart-to-heart to clear the air. Because it hadn't cleared the air at all; it had only brought something meaningful to the fore. Something that he saw now that Sakura had been refusing to acknowledge for a long, long time. Something he'd just brought to light in front of her.

Something in all its brutal, uncompromising, remorseless glory.

She reached up and inched her scarf a bit higher, snugger, around her throat and face; looking away from him. Hiding from him.

"We should go."

He nodded, swallowing. He couldn't seem to clear his throat.

With great effort he let his shoulders drop from their adrenaline rush, his fists unclench. He reached up and recovered his Sharingan, ignoring the pain that resonated inside his skull, the overly sharp images that seemed to pass in slow-motion before his eyes, the dampness on his cheek. He knew what they meant. He knew what she'd seen.

Wiping the crimson from his cheek, he stifled his wince as it brushed too close to his aching eye.

He knew what he would see, the next time he looked in a mirror.

He knew what Sakura had seen in him that day.

He had a gut feeling he knew what she'd felt, too.

It was a quiet trip back to Konoha.


AN: Thank you to aijoinu and sleetfallrain for their beta help and feedback on this chapter! I am so very grateful to you!

AN: Coughcough. So, I hear you like angst. Coughcough. Author backs away slowly...


Reader Review Replies: Chapter 7

Cassandra Echizen: Shhhh, you'll spoil it! 8D

x.-kTa-.x : Aw, you're making me blush!

Misssbehavin: I'm glad you found it, too!

Edove: Thank you very much for recognizing each character's personality! I tried very hard to make each one distinguishable from the others around them.

I'm in here: If you're smiling, I'm smiling! 8) hahahaha, I enjoyed writing Kakashi flaunting the book in front of Itachi, I admit. He's a smart young man, our Kakashi, and isn't afraid to enlist a little help from a summon or two to comfort his precious people. As for Sakura, yes, we will be learning more about her past soon. Promise! (Glad you enjoyed Naruto's appearance and words of wisdom, too!) Thank you for the review, IIH!

Aijoinu: Regarding Kakashi's 'stage', you absolutely nailed it. Yes, he's definitely 'in between' and awkward, and Sakura's kind of 'stuck' not knowing how to BE when he's flirting both stages in his life as a consequence. This pair, argh! XD Thank you for the feedback, and see you next update!

Angrypixels: The angst will be increasing! Wait for it!

Guest: Glad you're enjoying! There are a few age-swap KakaSaku stories out there. I keep trying to make a list, but then forget. I should ask for help and then post a list one of these days so everyone can enjoy more!

Grace: Hahahah, I love including Pakkun. Any excuse for a doggie in a story!

Hani-licious: Thank you for the support, hon. 8) But don't worry about it-the nice thing about anonymous reviews is they can be removed with the press of a button!

ForsakenKalika: More coming!

Guest: Here we have the next chapter! I hope you enjoy!

Miksev17: Thank you! I hope you liked this chapter, too!

Hana-Taisho: Thank you so much, I really liked adding a bit of Pakkun-time, too. There's something comforting about having a doggie to cuddle with. Thank you for the lovely review, and yes, I've finally found time to write again. I'm working on the epilogue. You stay safe, too!

JigokuShoujosRevenge: Sakura is in a conflicting state, yeah, so kind of a 'weird' state. She's questioning things. (Glad you liked Pakkun, btw!)