"Well that was a fucking waste of time," Edward grumbled angrily as he thrust his hands into his coat pockets, trying to keep himself upright as they trudged through the thick forest of weeds that led back to the alchemist's house Turning his hardened gaze toward Mustang, he mockingly asked, "Any other secrets you'd like to share with me?"

Looking up from the ground, Roy turned his glassy-eyed stare toward the disgruntled former alchemist. The young man was beyond livid. In all honesty, Roy shouldn't have kept his sources hidden from Edward. But the temptation of having unobstructed and uninterrupted resources, whether the surveyed alchemists were aware of his surveying presence or not, was far too great. To answer Edward's question, no; he didn't have any other hidden resources, at least none in the field of chimerical alchemy. Saying nothing, Roy slowly shook his head.

Edward drew his lips back and narrowed his eyes, making his resentment of the General's actions even more painstakingly obvious. "If I find that you're lying to me, and I will find out, you can count me out of any of your future plans." Turning his coldhearted gaze forward and ignoring Roy's shocked expression, he continued, "I'll stick through with this for Hawkeye's sake, because right now I'm sure as hell not doing it for you. If this is how your time as Fuhrer is going to be, then your reign will be short-lived, and the end will not be pleasant." Fixing his gaze once more on Roy, he darkly added, "All secrets have a cost."

Roy was about to respond when he realized that they were at the back door of the old, battered house. Pushing the screen door in, they quickly stepped inside. If they moved fast enough, they could avoid the old man entirely, as he was still crouched on the floor of the shed, mulling over his failure.

When they navigated their way to the kitchen, they found that Riza was still seated atop the stainless steel table, her head hung low. Hearing them walk in, she languidly raised her head and acknowledged them by raising her brows.

Having remembered his conversation with Edward on the train, Roy quickly hid fleeting frown, silently demanding his rising pulse to fall. Had she grown even paler in the short time they were gone, or was it simply the lighting?

"Ready to go," Edward asked lightly, breaking the silence that would have otherwise followed.

She nodded slowly and slid off the table. Upon having her feet touch the floor, however, she lost her footing and stumbled slightly. Roy was immediately at her side, helping her catch her balance. For the umpteenth time that day, he asked if she was okay.

She responded by jerking her arm from his grip and muttering a sharp, "I'm fine," before leading herself toward the home's front door.

As Roy prepared to follow after her, Edward stopped next to him and shot him a quizzical look that asked: What was that?

Roy knitted his brows together and answered with a quick head shake. I don't know.


Out of the corner of his eye, Roy saw Edward glance down at the watch on his wrist. "Train leaves at 6:30," he murmured toward no one in particular. "At the rate we're walking, we should be back in town by 5:45; plenty of time to board."

Roy nodded lightly before turning his gaze back toward the road they were walking along. He secretly hoped that a car or cart would pass by and offer them a ride back into town, because as time went on, he realized that Riza was walking more slowly and cautiously, her eyes never leaving her feet. Every attempt at speaking with her resulted in a rather blunt reply, with her always returning to staring intently at the ground.

Then again, maybe their decelerated pace would cause them to miss the train back to Central. Because honestly, he had no idea what they were going to do once they returned.

Admit they'd hit a dead end? Hide her away until her dying day… or until the military finds her and executes her?

Roy pushed the latter thought away. He would never let that happen; he'd die first…

Feeling a slight and fleeting pressure on his left shoulder, Roy twisted his head around in time to see Riza straighten herself, her eyes remaining on her feet. It had been the third or fourth time she had stumbled into him…

"Are you sure you're feeling fine," he asked delicately. "We can stop for a few minutes if you'd-"

"I'm fine, Colonel," she replied sharply.

Colonel? A slip of the tongue, perhaps...? He and Edward both stopped walking.

After taking a few steps forward, she realized that her two companions had halted. As she turned to face them, her legs buckled and gave out beneath her.

In an instant, Roy had darted forward, catching her as she fell. "That's it," he said sternly, "You are not 'fine.'"

Riza weakly protested, slurring out "I'm fine" over and over again.

Roy's mind immediately went to the crazed alchemist they had just parted ways with and the fact that the man had insisted she remain behind. "Did he give you anything," he quietly demanded, his silent alarm rising in him.

She lethargically shook her head and muttered a faint 'no.'

He panickedly looked up at Edward, who was just as, if not more, confused. When their eyes met, despite the situation, they silently agreed: They would not turn back.


"Alright," Edward said as he approached the distressed alchemist and his semi-conscious subordinate, "I got two rooms." Showing a small silver key to Roy, he added, "We should probably go in through the back. The last thing we need is to arouse suspicion."

Roy nodded in agreement and looked down at the woman in his arms, who had her head rested against his shoulder.

After hurriedly making it back into the small town of Arcadia, Roy and Edward had discovered that it was lacking a clinic, doctor, or any other medically competent individual. They had contemplated returning to Central via the train, but quickly nixed the idea given Riza's deteriorating condition; she was not prepared for travel. Instead, they opted to find a temporary place to regroup, in the hopes that they would be able to contact someone.

Following Edward through the back entrance of the motel, Roy tagged along behind as the three of them ascended the staircase.

Upon reaching the second level, Edward led Roy down the hallway and over to one of the rooms. After the younger man inserted the key and opened the door, Roy rushed in and sat Riza on the closer of the two beds, stripping her uniform jacket off in the process. Once he had gently guided her head down to the pillow, he immediately turned to Edward, who was still standing in the doorway.

Thrusting his thumb over his shoulder, Edward stated, "I'll go get some water and more towels." Pointing to Riza's jacket, he added, "And I'll take that to the wash." Moments after Roy tossed it to him, the young man was already gone.

Turning his attention back to his ill comrade, Roy asked, "How are you feeling?"

Riza murmured an unintelligible reply in response.

Reaching out and resting his hand on her forehead, Roy realized that she was burning up, her face and brow drenched in sweat. He moved swiftly over to and into the washroom attached to their room, grabbed the first washcloth he could find, and proceeded to soak it in a stream of cool water. Moments later he reemerged and rushed over to her, placing the damp cloth on her forehead.

After she muttered what he would assume to be a faint "thank you," he reached over to the phone that was on the nightstand between the two beds and dialed. A few rings later, Dr. Knox's voicemail picked up. He wasn't home. Scowling to himself, Roy realized that he didn't know the hospital's number either. He seriously doubted the region's phonebook would have it either. As he hung up the phone in frustration, Edward stormed into the room, stopping on the other side of the bed.

"What the hell are these?" Edward held something up in the air for Roy to see.

Leaning forward slightly and squinting, Roy recognized the small, strange object: a nearly empty bag of bush nuts.

"It's a bag of nuts, Edward," Roy replied bluntly. "Nothing wildly exciting about them."

"I know what they are, dumbass," the blond man remarked rudely. "What are they?"

"Bush nuts…" Roy began again, trying to determine the reason for the young man's unrelenting animosity toward the small snack bag.

Edward sneered at the man. "Well, there's our problem," he retorted bitterly as he tossed the bag on the bedside table, "Bush nuts are poisonous to dogs."

Roy felt all of the blood drain from his face. Poisonous?! He frantically looked down at Riza, whose breathing had become shallower and quicker, tremors ripping through her body in shorter intervals. Snapping his head back up in a panic, his widened eyes met Edward's. "What do we do," he choked out, the fear rising in his voice. "Is there an antidote? A cure? A-"

"I don't know," Edward cut him off anxiously. "I-I don't know!"

"How did you know they were toxic," Roy shot back, the volume in his voice rising.

"Because I gave them to Den once," Edward snapped back. "I don't know… Granny was the one to take care of everything!"

"Well what did she do?!"

"How the hell am I supposed to know," Edward exclaimed loudly. "I was five! All I remember was Granny called the vet and that's it!"

Roy stopped and immediately looked down at the trembling figure sprawled out on the bed before him. He couldn't believe he was about to do this… but there was no other option.

He was desperate.


Roy pressed the phone receiver firmly to his ear as it continued to ring, his other hand massaging the bridge of his nose. God, this was stupid. He should just hang up now… Breathing in deeply, he began to exhale sharply when the line suddenly connected.

"Hello, Dr. Hendrich's office. How may I help-"

"I think my… dog's dying," Roy blurted out in exasperation, stumbling over the word 'dog.' It felt dirty and vile rolling off his tongue. He needed to remember, though, that he was simply gathering possibly valuable information. It's just like going roleplaying while undercover, he reminded himself.

"Sir," the soft voice of the receptionist reached out to him. "Tell me what happened."

"I gave her bush nuts," he babbled, feeling his composure slipping.

It suddenly dawned on him. He killed her.

It was his fault. Everything.

He sent her on that mission. He acted like a fool. His ignorance. His stupidity!

His uselessness…

The woman's voice snapped him back to reality. "Okay, sir. Now what are the symptoms?"

"She can't walk, has been sick several times; I know she has a fever, tremors," he rapidly rattled off.

"That does sound like a bush nut toxicity, sir."

Of course it does, he reminded himself bitterly.

"Alright," the woman spoke again, "Now what is the size and breed of your dog?"

Breed? Human, he wanted to say, but the woman would probably think he was insane. "…Mixed," he finally decided on, hating himself internally. "57 kilograms," he added to answer her question about 'size.'

"And how much did she eat," the receptionist drawled out, suddenly seeming to lose interest in the case.

"I don't know," he growled. "A few handfuls?"

"Sounds like she has a sensitivity to them, sir," she finally said, the nonchalance in her voice making Roy want to snap.

"Well, what do I do?" He was beginning to lose patience with her, especially with her now less-than-concerned tone. Someone was dying!

"Keep her hydrated and resting," the receptionist replied. "Symptoms should resolve within twelve to twenty-four hours."

…That was it? She made it seem as if Riza was going to die! No… He realized it was himself that that exaggerated the situation in his mind. The woman was just doing her job…

"Thank you," he responded, now subdued, as he hung up the phone. Turning to head back to the room from the hall's payphone, he saw Edward leaning against the wall near the room's door.

Brows raised, the blond asked, "Well…?"

"They said that symptoms should resolve in twelve to twenty-four hours," Roy replied dejectedly.

"Well," Edward began slowly, "That's good. Now," he continued with more authority, "We need to figure out what to do next."


Riza could hear the two men talking in a "hushed tone" outside the hotel room as clear as day. They were discussing what their options were. Both agreed that Central was a horrible idea at the moment. From what she heard, Edward had suggested Resembool as their next destination, in order to regroup.

With the way she felt at that moment, she had no desire to go anywhere.

Closing her eyes and pulling the blanket up to her nose, she exhaled slowly as she continued to listen.

Then, the conversation suddenly changed. Or rather, their words did.

Roy and Edward were talking at the same volume, but their words had suddenly lost their meaning to her, blending and morphing together into a jumble of gibberish.

Riza frowned and strained to listen, trying to make sense of the sudden change in language. No… not language. Dialect? Tone?

However, almost as soon as the phenomenon happened, it stopped; their words becoming coherent and jointed once more.

Maybe it was the exhaustion? Or maybe caused by the sickness she was plagued with. Whatever it was, it was gone.

Deciding that she was too drained to even attempt to listen anymore, she allowed herself to relax, hoping that she would be able to at least get some rest.


Riza stared at the vast emptiness before her, trying to make sense of it all.

Turning around, she saw a massive, grey…door?...gate?... behind her. Frowning, she looked it up and down. A variety of symbols, some alchemical, she realized, and others that were completely unknown to her. One that she did recognize, however ,was the symbol for flame alchemy; one that she knew all too well.

Was that how she got there? When did she…

It suddenly hit her.

The transmutation circle.

The crazed doctor.

The immense pain…

"So have you figured out where you are?"

She whirled around at the sound of the voice, finding herself face-to-face with a humanoid, white silhouette, its features barely visible against the alabaster background it stood against.

She furrowed her brow. Was she dead? Was this-?

"Not exactly," the creature replied in a sing-song voice; as if it had read her mind. "But close," it added gleefully.

Rather than play a guessing game with this… 'thing,' she decided to cut to the chase. "What are you?"

"Me? Why, they call me by many names," the androgynous figure quipped. "I am the world; the universe! I am God. I am Truth. Everything, yet nothing; all, but one. And," It pointed Its long, pale finger at her, "I am you." Suddenly, It was directly in front of her, Its face inches from hers. With one swift movement, It drove its hand into her chest.

Riza barely had time to gasp before the silhouette vanished, only to reappear sitting cross-legged a few yards in front of her. Clutching her chest, her eyes flashed downward, expecting a mess of blood and gore. Instead, she found that everything was intact; the pain she expected nonexistent. Beneath her clenched fist, she could feel her heart beating. What… what was that?

"In exchange for your life, I took something of equal value," the figure boasted. Its grin widening, It pridefully declared, "Equivalent exchange," as It thrust Its thumb over its shoulder.

Looking up, Riza looked past the figure and froze, her eyes widening with horror.

Sitting cross-legged just a few feet behind it was another slowly lifted its head, its blonde hair cascading in waves over its shoulders. Deep brown eyes caught hers, its brows raised in a sort of surprise.

It couldn't be… That was impossible.

It was… herself.

Upon seeing Riza's shock, it smiled sadly at her.

"What-what is this," Riza demanded in disbelief as she slowly backed away. After taking a few steps backwards, her back found the grey door she stood in front of.

"Unfortunately," the white figure explained, "You're out of time." Raising Its hand up, it lifted one finger and grinned, "But remember this: Those that trespass in the domain of God will be punished."

Suddenly, the massive doors of the Gate behind her opened and a flurry of small black hands burst through the darkness, tangling and snaking around her. All at once, they tightened and began dragging her through the Gate. In a fit of fear, Riza tried desperately to break free. However, after realizing that her attempts were feeble and fruitless, she gave in and allowed herself to succumb to the darkness that had set in.

As the Gate doors began to close, the last thing she saw through them was the copy. Its sad brown eyes locked on hers, it murmured, "Hurry back," before the doors slammed shut.


Roy slowly opened his eyes and blinked, trying to chase the bleariness that had set in away. A moment later, he quietly hissed to himself and squeezed them shut, effectively blocking out the sunlight that poured through the motel room's window. He took a few seconds to process, trying to remember where he was.

That's right… They were still in Arcadia. After his "chat" with Edward, Roy had slipped back into the room to attend to Riza, only to find that she had fallen asleep.

For a majority of the night he remained awake, keenly focusing all of his senses on her. At times when her breathing became painstakingly shallow, he slowly crept over to the edge of her bed and knelt there, leaning against it in order to monitor her breathing. Finally, during the last time, he had found that he had fallen asleep. After waking up with his arms folded atop the bed and his head upon his arms, he slowly slinked away from the bed and crawled into his own. In the event that she did wake up, he quietly assumed that she'd want the space. Despite fighting long and hard against the urge to sleep, he eventually surrendered and succumbed to it.

His thoughts once again going to Riza, he made an attempt to roll over in order to see her, but found that a slight pressure against his back prevented him from doing so. Baffled by the presence, he slowly turned his head to look over his shoulder, only to find a certain blonde curled up next to him; her back pressed against his own.

Moving cautiously and at a snail's pace, Roy slowly pulled away and navigated himself around so that he was now facing her back. He watched her for a few moments, praying that his movements didn't cause her to awaken.

She didn't stir; her side rising and falling with every slow, deep breath she took.

He kept his gaze on her for a moment longer, taking in her features. In this light, her blonde hair seemed to give off a radiant glow. Seeing his, he couldn't help but smile slightly. Their orientation was nearly the same as when he had awoken first after that fateful night in Ishval…

Except it wasn't, he now realized. Because then there was happiness, love, and hell, even reckless abandon. And now there were feelings of fear and the potential for loss in the forefront of his mind.

No, he decided; it was nothing like Ishval.

Suddenly, a slight movement caught his eye. Slowly shifting his gaze upward, he saw her ear twitch ever so slightly. Staring at it curiously, he watched as it twitched again. He hadn't seen them that closely yet. Had they been on something else, he would even go as far as describe their details as "masterfully crafted" in terms of alchemy. But on her... Using that description felt so wrong. She wasn't "art." She was a human being...

It only took him a few additional seconds to realize that the ear's fluttering was coinciding with every breath he took. Grasping this realization, he attempted to swallow the inevitable next breath he was about to release, resulting in a soft fit of coughs.

His attempts at trying to remain silent had failed.

Aroused from her sleep, Riza rolled over. Upon realizing that Roy was next to her, her saffron eyes locked on his and narrowed as a result of her confusion. "Sir," she croaked, her voice still waking up with her, "What are you doing?"

Unsure of how to answer, Roy didn't. And it turns out, he didn't even have to.

Her eyes widened in realization and she bolted upright, resulting in a wave of dizziness. Reaching up, she slapped her forehead with her hand and muttered something under her breath.

Sitting up along with her in concern, Roy asked, "Are you alright?" He knew that the question was horribly over-asked, but he didn't care. Something possessed her to seek comfort in him during the night and he desperately wanted to know why.

"I'm fine," she quietly shot back. "I'm…" she trailed off, her eyes gazing distantly ahead. After what appeared to be an internal struggle within herself, she gave in and let out a shaky sigh. "…Not." Taking a deep breath, she continued, "I'm angry, Roy… Angry and confused and hurting." She hung her head as if defeated. "But most of all… I'm terrified."

Looking down at her hands, she said, "I'm afraid of dying. It's stupid, it's selfish, but there's so much for left for us to accomplish. I made a promise to you and…" She stopped when she noticed her hands trembling and chuckled bitterly. "I can't even keep my emotions straight; frightened by a ridiculous nightmare. It seemed so real…"

Without Roy needing to pry or ask, she slowly eased her way into explaining it, perhaps out of desperation for comfort or out of fear; one thing was certain though: Roy would wholeheartedly listen, because right now she was allowing herself to open up.

As she trudged on, recounting every last detail, Roy felt a wave of sickness wash over him.

Her description was far too detailed and familiar to be a dream, nightmare, night terror. The vividness in which she described it left him feeling cold and numb.

He hadn't even realized that she had finished her tale, too consumed in an internal state of realization and dread.

It confirmed his deep-seated theory; one he hoped and prayed wouldn't be true. Edward made it clear that it was entirely possible something else could be taken.

Besides taking her humanity, it took the one thing that she used to guide herself and her decisions. The one thing that she put into everything she did; what she lived by.

The Truth took the one thing that defined her as 'Riza Hawkeye': Her heart.


A/N: And so ends Chapter 8. I hope you guys didn't mind the slight bit of dark humor I threw in there (hopefully it didn't border 'crack fiction.').

Make sure you keep Riza's actions and words in this chapter in the back of your minds... they're important.

Fun fact!: 'Bush nuts' is another name for 'macadamia nuts.' I renamed them since 'macadamia' is a pretty specific name (originating from Australia, might I add!). But the symptoms Riza displayed (loss of leg function, tremors, sickness, fever, severe lethargy) are all signs of macadamia nut toxicity. Interestingly, no one knows what exactly in the nuts causes toxicity. Other foods that cause toxicity in canines are: chocolate, alcohol, grapes/raisins, caffeine, yeast, avocados, and xylitol (in gum).

Finally, thank you to all that have favorited, followed, and reviewed Humanity! Feel free to give me any feedback (especially if you feel that the characters are OOC!). I apologize for not responding to reviews like I said I would… Studying for Microbiology consumed my life this weekend! I promise to keep up this time…