"You know. I'm kinda curious as to what Luss' family's like, shishi." Senpai said with a smile.
Both of us were about a foot away from Luss, wanting to give him some space. I could feel his nervousness leaking through his pores it was that bad.
"Curiosity killed the cat senpai." I muttered.
"Ah. But satisfaction brought it back." Apparently Luss had heard us...
After another few seconds we heard the door unlock.
"Wer ist es?*" Came a female voice.
"Es ist dein Sohn Mutter.**" Lussuria said softly as if he were walking on eggshells already.
"Lussuria?" She asked as she came into better lighting. She was a plump woman. Not fat, but not skinny. She had wavy white/blond hair that went down to her side, plush red lips, and shinning but sharp green eyes.
Said man nodded his head. Lussuria's mother looked behind him and spotted us.
"Oh. Bitte. Herein.***" The mother said, ushering us inside with one sweep of her small hand
"Who is it Delia!?" A rough male voice spoke, shockingly in Italian. (Didn't want to keep using Google Translate XD)
"It's your son." She called back in a thick German accent.
"My son is right here." He stated.
"Shit... Darek's here." I heard Lussuria mutter.
"Not that one." She said leading us into a decent sized family room, "The other one."
Inside the room were two males. One who looked older than Lussuria's mother who had grey hair and a shitload of wrinkles. Seems he isn't all that happy of a person. And another one who seemed younger than Luss who had short brown hair and eyes that seemed to dance with emotions. The older man looked up at us and glared.
"So you finally came back huh? What? Did you get kick out of your house and decide to crawl back here?" He asked
Lussuria looked like he was fighting for words but could find them. To tell you the truth, it unsettled me to see him like this. So I stepped in.
"I don't think he would ever be kicked out of our home since he's the one who keeps everyone from killing each other sir. So if you don't mind, shut up, and actually listen to him." I say, surprisingly still in my monotone. Ah you should see everyone's faces, pretty funny.
"Ushishishisi. Go frog." I hear Senpai mutter. I even heard Lussuria and him mother giggle a little.
"Who are these brats?" The big man asks.
"Ah. This is Flan and this is Belphegor." Luss said, pointing at each one of us respectively.
"Well he needs to take that ridiculous hat off and you boy," He says pointing at Bel-senpai, "You need to cut your hair. You look like a damn mop. And take that damn tiara off. You're not a girl. Or are you a fag like my failure of a son here?"
"Ushishi. The Prince doesn't have to cut his hair if he doesn't want to." Was all Belphegor said. I guess it was taking a lot of self control to not strangle this man right there and then.
"Boys, before you start arguing, please, sit down." Luss' mother said. We all sat down on a couch that could probably fit the entire Varia.
I looked over at the boy that must have been Darek. There was amusement dancing in his eyes as if he thought all this was some sort of joke.
"Well boy. Why are you here? Come to ask us for forgiveness like you should have 20 years ago? He asked. What was there to forgive? You don't chose to be gay.
"No. Me and some friends came here for vacation and... I wanted to visit my family." Lussuria said, his voice getting quieter and quieter as he went.
"Well we don't want you here." The man named Darek said.
And that was when the funniest thing all day happened. Delia hit Darek on the head with a giant ass spoon.
"Shit. Mother? What the hell?" He shouted.
"Don't you dare talk to me like that young man! And both of you better start welcoming these young men! I lost my baby boy 20 years ago and he finally came back. I am not losing him again gay or not!" She shouted, surprising everyone in the room.
"Ushishishi. Momma's got spunk." Senpai said.
"Damn right momma's got spunk." She said, "So now. We are all going to have a nice conversation. You three are staying for dinner. And I will here NO complaining of any form." I like this mother.
"Damn bossy woman." I heard Luss' dad say as spunky mother left the room.
"Your mother's scary Luss-nee-chan." I say.
"What did it call you?" Darek asked Lussuria.
"Luss. Nee. Chan." I say slowly, "And I'm a guy. Not an it."
"Right... Not gunna ask what that means. What's your name again?" He asked. Why was I talking to him?
"Flan" I say bluntly, "Here. Let me answer every question that will probably pop into your small little brain; I wear this hat Because Bel-senpai makes me. Bel-senpai is the guy in the tiara. He wears a tiara because he claims to be a prince. Only he knows why he covers his eyes. No we are not you brothers gay lovers. I know I don't show any emotion, I do that for a reason. No, I'm not going to tell you that reason. And yes you are pissing me off."
That last statement was true, even if I didn't show it.
"Ushishishi. Froggy's on a roll."
"Oh. You're so cute Flan-kun~" Lussuria says while hugging my head.
"Lussuria. Get off of me if you know what's good for you." I warn.
Don't touch Flan when he's annoyed. Everyone knows this. Last guy who did is now in a mental institute.
Luss quickly back off and looked at his stunned family members.
"Where did you find this guy?" Luss' dad asked looking at me like I was crazy. I'm not crazy. I'm probably the most sane out of all the Varia.
"Ushishisi. On a mountainside in France."
"French. That explains it." The old man said.
"Father. Lets not get into this now."
The old man huffs as he leans back in his chair. It was at that moment that Lussuria's cellphone went off. And he picked it up, and that itself was a mistake. 'cause right when he hit on, all you could hear was, "VROOOOOOOIIIIIIIIII!"
I'm pretty sure the windows rattled.
"Oops~! One minute. I have to take this." Luss said as he stepped outside.
"What. Was. That?" Darek said, his eyes as big as saucers.
"Ushishi. Our loud ass of a commander." Bel replies.
"What exactly do you boys do?" Luss' dad asked.
"Ushishi. We're hitmen."
*Insert facepalm here*
"Senpai. You're not supposed to say that."
"Oops. It slipped. Shishi."
"Ahahaha! Do you actually think we would believe that?" Darek asked. Okay... Now I don't care if they know. I'll just let senpai skewer them.
"Believe what?" Luss and momma said while walking back into the living room.
"The freak with the tiara said that they're all hitmen."
"What was that peasent?"
And now senpai's getting mad... this should be interesting.
"But Darek... We are."
*Insert facepalm here... again*
Does no one know that that's supposed to be secret?
"Right. And where are your suits and fancy weapons?" He asks. Bad move
"Lussuria. My knives." Senpai says holding out his hand.
"No Bel. No killing my family."
"Frog."
"What am I supposed to do senpai? I'm not the one with your knives. And you heard Luss. No killing his family."
"Are you guys actually serious about this hitman thing?" Momma asked.
"Ushishishi. Of course we are. Princes don't lie"
"You lie all the time Senpai. Oh wait. You're a fake prince so it's okay."
Stab
Seems Senpai found his knives.
"Mom... He just stabbed that guy." Darek whined.
"Well. I guess it seems my worthless son isn't so worthless after all." Daddy said.
"Oh yeah. What did Squalo want?" I asked Luss, a knife still sticking out of my head.
"He was wondering if we were coming back for dinner. I told them to just either order room service or go out. It seems him and Bossu~ are going out but leaving Levi behind." Lussuria said.
"Ah. So Xanxus is taking Squalo on a date." Was my reply.
"Ushishishi. Seems like the Boss is gunna get some."
"Alright boys. Time for dinner. You guys can talk at the table." Momma said. She acted a lot like Luss if you thought about it. I guess this is where he got the mother-like influence he uses on the Varia.
Author's Note: That... Was fun XD
I love making people assholes.
I might take awhile longer to update since school is starting back up tomorrow. But I'll try yo be quick. ^^
Translations:
*Who is it?
**It's your son mother
*** Oh. Please. Come in.
Google translate has been used. You have been warned.
