Short Story 01 – Figuring Out What's Missing in this Wonderful World!
Kazuma.
"Something's missing."
I said to Darkness who was reading a book beside me.
"What do you mean by that, Kazuma?"
She asked as she closed the book on her hands.
"Don't you find it strange? It feels like there's something that's off ever since Gintoki and the others came here, but I just can't point what it was."
"I agree. We got four new residents in this house but it feels like there's a missing piece in the puzzle."
Now that I thought about it, Aqua and Megumin were also looking for something but I always forgot to ask them regarding the matter.
What was it I wonder?
"Gin-chan, Sadaharu still won't eat. He also hadn't pooped yet ever since we arrived in this country-aru."
Behind the couch where Darkness and I were sitting, Kagura sat beside her humungous dog who seem to be staring at its untouched food.
"He's probably just in heat. Just find him a bitch to bang and he'll be fine afterwards."
The fellow NEET who's sitting in his chair while reading Jump said as he scratched his silver-haired head.
And then all of a sudden, the blockhead crusader jumped towards Sadaharu.
"Sadaharu-dono! C-c-c-c-c-c-c-can I be that b-b-b-bitch! Will you pin me down with your large heavy paws?! Will you latch into my bare skin with those razor sharp claws as you put your ***** into my *****?! Will you *********** my ******* as you ****** my ******* and ****** me until I *********?!"
"STAY AWAY FROM SADAHARU, PERVERT!"
Kagura punched Darkness before she managed to touch Sadaharu.
It seems that the already perverted Eroness reached a whole new level under the tutelage of Sacchan who I believe is hiding the ceiling right now.
As I watch the two girls with Amazonian strength battle for Sadaharu, I noticed the dog itself going to a corner and circle a small area before making a very familiar crouching position.
"Oi! The dog's about to drop a bomb here! Get him out of here!"
I jumped from the couch and went straight to Sadaharu.
Gintoki went ahead of me carrying a leash which he attached to the dog's collar and used it to drag him outside.
"Hrghnn! Sadaharu, where are your manners?! A dog's toilet is anywhere but inside the house!"
Gintoki said as he desperately tried to pull the dog's leash.
"It's no use! Let's find a newspaper to catch the poop instead!"
Seeing that Sadaharu won't budge, I decided to suggest Plan B.
I looked around to see if there's a newspaper or anything similar in the house.
"Darkness, have you found anything yet?"
There was no response.
"Darkness?"
I don't know if it's instincts or something else, but for some reason, I turned my head towards the dog's direction.
"Sadaharu-dono! I shall be the replacement for newspaper! Now, release all of your warm manure and humiliate me in front of everybody~! Aaaah~!"
Darkness is lying on the floor where the landing spot of Sadaharu's poop will be.
"Zuma! We could use this-aru!"
Kagura threw something at me that looks like a poster roll.
Wait, this is a poster roll.
I opened it and realized that this is an exclusive poster of Terakado Otsuu, Shinpachi's idol.
If we use this, the glasses will definitely go berserk.
We'll have to worry for it later.
By the way, is the poop so big it's stuck in the dog's ass? It's almost a minute and not a single dropping yet.
Kagura dragged the perverted crusader away as I placed the poster in the landing spot.
As if on cue, large amount of dog manure burst out from Sadaharu's ass.
Thankfully, the poster was large enough for the humungous poop.
All of us sighed in relief now that we got out of this shitty situation.
Just then, the door swung open and a goddess with a foul mood came in.
"That Lich! I had her take care of Emperor Zell for me and she lost him! She's even lying, saying that I already took him before I went to Alcanretia!"
As Aqua continues to rant about her missing "child", I noticed a movement underneath the pile of manure.
I see. So that's what was missing since the people from Edo got here.
"Aqua, I think I know where Emperor Zell is."
"Really? Where is my child, Kazuma?"
I pointed my finger to the poop with a wry smile.
Aside from the poop, a yellow chick and a black cat coughed small bits of manure from their mouths as the try to catch their breath.
The thing that was missing was our very own mascots, Emperor Zell and Chomusuke.
"Emperor Zell!"
As Aqua reaches to her 'dragon', the rest of us ran away from the house to escape the wrath of an angry goddess.
-Short Story 01 End-
A/N: Sorry if the chapter was short. The real chapter will be coming soon!
(Shinpachi) Did you just changed the fanfic's title?
(Datu Kula) No I didn't!
