Day 8/ Semi-Finals
"What's up, yall?" said Orochimaru, hip-hopish. The contestants were confused. "What the heck was that?!" asked Sasuke. "You know, what's
cracka-lacking?!" said Orochimaru. Now the judges were confused. "You know, I'm representing." said Orochimaru, with a *wink* *wink*,
*nudge* *nudge* to Jiraiya. "Seriously, what's with you?" asked Jiraiya. "Okay, okay, just quit nagging me, woman. First of all, I had a Noz (for
all you nobodies, that's an energy drink), so I'm sorta really hyper!! Look at my hands!!" said Orochimaru, showing his hands, which were VERY
shaky. "Second of all, I'm giving a hint of their next challenge." said Orochimaru. Jiraiya perked up and started laughing. "Oh, oh! I get it!
They're representing!" said Jiraiya. Orochimaru looked at him. "No. You don't do it right." "What the heck is our challenge!?!?!" yelled Naruto.
"It's not really a challenge, it's more like the audience's decision." said Tsunade. The contestants were still clueless. *sigh* "You're gonna be
asked questions, and at the end, the audience decides who's out." said Tsunade.
"So………………… who's up?" asked Orochimaru. Naruto was about to answer, until, "No, no, no, not yet. We have to have our introducer open
the show! Take it away, Ryan!" Ryan Seacrest slid onto the stage. "Hello America!" he said. "He means, Leaf village." said Orochimaru. "And
welcome to AMERICAN IDOL!!!" "He means, Leaf village talent show." "And let's introduce our judges! Simon, who I really hate!" Orochimaru
stood up. "I guess that's me!" Suddenly he got pelted with rocks, he hid under the table, and hissed. "Randy!" said Ryan. "I guess that's you."
said Jiraiya, pointing at Tsunade. She picked up a chair and brought it down on Jiraiya's head. "And Paula!" Tsunade waved her hand and went
back to beating the crap out of Jiraiya. "Now on today's show-!" he interrupted, because…… well…… he got shot. The audience gasped at the
dead Ryan. The judges looked at Orochimaru. "I didn't do it." he said. Suddenly, Simon Cowell steps out with a pistol with smoke coming out of
it. "Fag." He said, and pulled out a jar of oil, poured it on the dead Ryan, pulled out a cigarette, pulled out a lighter, smoked the cigarette, and
threw the cigarette on Ryan, who ignited into flames (Yay!). Suddenly, ninjas jumped on the stage. "You're under arrest!" the ninjas yelled.
"You'll never get me coppers!" Simon yelled, and used the escape jutsu.
"Okay………that was a whole bunch of nothing." said Orochimaru. "Anyway, who wants to go first?!" said Orochimaru, again. Naruto was about
to speak, until Orochimaru said, "Wait, wait, we have a surprise for you!" He pulled a rope, and a curtain opened. All of the previous
contestants were there. "Your former contestants!! They haven't really been doing anything, since they lost in complete humiliation." said
Orochimaru, laughing. He pulled the rope again, and the curtain closed. "What about our judge for the day?" asked Gaara, bored. "I'm glad you
asked! It's an old favorite!! Say hello to Neji…… again!" said Orochimaru. Neji walked in, and the audience boo-ed. "I don't get it!! No one likes
him!!" yelled Naruto. "I liked him," said Orochimaru, "And not many people like you either." Naruto shut up after that.
"Now onto your first contestant," started Orochimaru. Naruto waved his hand wildly. "Sasuke, how about you?" asked Orochimaru. He
shrugged and sat down in the comfortable chair that they provided. "Are you ready for your questions?" asked Jiraiya. "Sure, whatever." said
Sasuke, coolly. "Are you emo?" asked Orochimaru. "What?!" yelled Sasuke, standing. "SIT DOWN!!" yelled Orochimaru. "And answer the
question." said Tsunade. "I ain't emo." The audience burst out laughing. "Yeah, right......" said Jiraiya. "Next question, are you gay?" asked
Tsunade. "WHAT?!" screamed Sasuke. "You heard me." said Tsunade. "No, I am not!" yelled Sasuke. "Then, why don't you date one of the girls
who are obsessed with you?" asked Orochimaru. "Uh…" "Yeah, that's what I thought." said Orochimaru. "Next question, do you suck your
thumb, when no one's looking?" asked Jiraiya. "Uh… not usually." said Sasuke, messing with his hands. "Sasuke Uchiha, folks!!" said
Orochimaru. The audience clapped. He left the stage thinking, That went well.
"Up next, Gaara!" said Jiraiya. Naruto slumped down and threw a fit. Gaara sat down in the chair. "First question, what are your goals in life?"
asked Orochimaru. Sasuke stood up. "What the crap?! Why wasn't I asked questions like that?!" he nagged. "Your turn is over." said
Orochimaru. Sasuke sat in his seat and started muttering to himself. "Now, continue." said Orochimaru. "I want to… uh… kill things." started
Gaara. Orochimaru clapped his hands. "YES!!" he yelled. "And…… I try to cut myself, but my sand won't let me." said Gaara. He pulled out a
kunai and tried to stab his hand, but the sand got in the way. The sand slapped him in the face and returned to the jar. Orochimaru sat and
sighed. "Um…… next question, if you could have anything, what would you have?" asked Tsunade. "Oh! I would have a whole bunch of guys-!"
started Gaara, but was cut off by Orochimaru, "Dude! No! We have young viewers watching! Sicko!" Gaara slumped in the chair. "Last question,
why do you file your nails?" asked Jiraiya. "You know, a guy's gonna look his best!" Gaara said, excitedly, "Just ask Neji! I saw him shaving his
legs once! (Sorry Neji fans)!" Everyone looked at Neji. He stood and left quietly. The judges started to chuckle. "Ok… ok… you can go." said
Tsunade, trying to stop laughing. No clapping for Gaara.
"Do we have anyone else?" asked Orochimaru. Naruto was hopping now. "Please! I'm right here!!" pleaded Naruto. "Just sit down, Naruto."
said Tsunade. He proudly sat down in the chair. "First question, what are your goals (as if we don't know)?" asked Tsunade. "To be Hokage!!
And get a girlfriend!" said Naruto. "Don't we all?" said Orochimaru. "Second question, if you could have anything, what would it be?" asked
Jiraiya. "World peace!" said Naruto, with the peace sign (did you know in Korea, that means 'victory'? There's a little bit of info for you). The
crowd applauded. "Final question of the night, when was your last shower?" asked Tsunade. "Ask Gaara, he'll know." said Sasuke. The crowd
went *ooo*. "What did you say, emo?!" yelled Naruto. "Actually, I do know. It was last week, Thursday to be exact." said Gaara. Naruto and
Sasuke backed away from Gaara, slowly.
"Now that we know each other's secrets," started Orochimaru, "We have a surprise, it's your parents!" A curtain opened, but nothing was
there. "What the-?" started Orochimaru. "All of their parents are dead." said Tsunade. "HAHAHA!! Sucks for you!!" said Orochimaru to the three
contestants. Tsunade socked him in the face. He kinda shut up after that. "Now we're gonna let the losers decide who's out." said Jiraiya. The
curtains opened to reveal the losers again. "GAARA!!" they yelled. The curtain closed again. Even Temari said it. "Alliance!" Gaara yelled. Temari
walked up to him and slapped him silly. "Fag!" she yelled and walked off. Two ninjas had to drag him off.
There you have it!! Are you ready? Cuz I hope you are, because FINALS are next!!! Get ready for Day 9!!!! P.S. Sorry all you Gaara and Sasuke fans.
