A/n: first off i'm sorry for not updating last week. some jerk stole our telephone cable directly from the post and it took away my internet privileges. i swear it was weird! who's stupid enough to steal telephone cables?! i understand electicity cables since it's copper wires can be sold but telephone?! =_= anyway the updates for other stories would be this week ( and ) until then please bear with this lame chappie...

guidelines:

'words' are flashback speeches ^-^


Chapter 8: déjà vu

As the three exited the elevator which took them to the ground floor lobby, everyone that saw them gave them dreamy looks. Some even approached them and had asked Shizuru for some autograph, which the actress gladly signed the papers with her autograph and gave them one of her 'fans smile' which made the staff of Kruger corporation to squeal and swoon over her. She likes her fans but sometimes they just couldn't give her some alone time and it makes her feel irritated. But being an actress, she just couldn't show her irritation and just flash a façade smile.

Nina saw how her mama had been crowded up by many people and she frowned when she saw people ganging up on her mama making her uncomfortable despite of the smile her mama shows them. She looked up to her papa and tugged her papa's hand. "Ne papa, mama's getting irritated. We should help her." she said childishly. She pointed her mama while looking at her papa with her cute puppy dog eyes.

Natsuki too was getting annoyed at her employees for swarming Shizuru with autograph requests or photo shoots with them by their camera phones. She has her leathered hand balled up and her teeth clenched as her irritation grew. 'Damn! Why does she always have fans everywhere?! Oh wait, she's an actress now. Tch! didn't change one bit! She's still entertaining them!' mentally slapping her forehead, she felt a tug on her right wrist and she looked down only to see a pouting Nina, pointing at Shizuru. She smiled gently seeing how cute her daughter is. "What is it honey? Is something the matter?" she asked, bending down and placing her right hand above her daughter's head.

"Papa! Tell those people to give mama some air!" she said, removing her papa's hand above her head and pointing her little hand to Shizuru's newly fans..

Natsuki just chuckled at Nina's irritation towards the fans of the brunette. "haha, it seems you took some things from me huh Nina?" she patted the child in the head and looked at Shizuru who has a façade showing to her fans. With a deep sigh she took her daughter in her arms and they approached her employees with a fierce glare. Her glare caused her employees who saw her stunned and scared at how she gave out her death glare.

Shizuru, with her back facing a certain blunette raised a brow when she saw the flocking fans stopped with their questions or requests. "Ara, is there something wrong?" she asked innocently to her fans. Her fans shook their head and bid their leave to the Kyoto-actress, saying that they have to get back o work.

"Tch! atleast my glare works on them." Natsuki said irritably, adjusting her hold on Nina. But the child squirmed and jumped off her papa's arms and ran towards Shizuru which the Kyoto-actress happily/truly smiled and hugged the child. She looked at the brunette and her glare soften and a mental smile was brought upon her seeing how Nina and Shizuru both smiling.A train of thoughts regarding of her past had crossed her mind, making her tone out from reality.

'Mou! Ikezu Natsuki!'

'I'm not! You know I can see through that damn façade!'

'You're the only one who can see through it. fufufu that's why I love my Natsuki!'

'heh! Whatever… I already said the L-word to you and I'm not saying it again. Now let me take you to that grumpy lion before he notice I kidnapped you from you're room.'

"PAPA!"

A loud yell from Nina cut her memory lane journey and she sheepishly rubbed the back of her neck and laughed. She looked at the two. Shizuru was carrying Nina with a smile on her face while her daughter has a cheek puff out and pouting.

"Ara, papa shouldn't make our baby waiting. She's kinda impatient like her papa." Shizuru teased making the bystanders near them look and have their jaws dropped open.

"Papa?" "Daughter?" "Mama?" everyone who heard Shizuru murmured.

Natsuki looked at everyone with a scowl on her face. "So? I'm not paying you to chat about my personal life. If this were to spread out, I'll have all of you fired and make sure you won't have any jobs available except cleaning the toilets!" she roared, making her staff scamper away in fear and yelled a reply of 'yes boss'. She sighed and shook her head. She was feeling stressed from all that happened and she wanted to have a long rest back at her house. "Please Viola-san, don't go saying about the arrangements here. Someone might-"

"Know." Someone said from Natsuki's back. They looked at the person who spoke and saw Arashi with a sweet smile plastered on her face. "It seems that rumors from the main company were true then.

"Artai… you too should shut up about this or else." Natsuki threatened.

Arashi chuckled and strides past Natsuki and towards Shizuru and Nina. She looked at the brunette and to the child she's holding. "Hello there miss Viola. I'm Arashi Artai.i believe you're already acquainted with my measly older brother, Nagi Artai?" she reached out to touch Nina but Nina snuggled closer to her mama and avoided Arashi's hand. "My, such a rebel just like her papa." She chuckled and looked back to Natsuki. "Nice work you've done here President. I am sure that Saeko-sama and Sifr had been proud of you, though the rumors of the 'monster' are still spreading like wild fire." She said grimly.

Natsuki dazed out hearing what Arashi told her. She felt her stomach churned and her heart rapidly beating. 'Monster huh? feh! I guess I am.'

Arashi had seen her boss' troubled state and decided to walk towards Natsuki and held her hand. She looked at Natsuki with concern filling her eyes and gently tightens her hold on her boss' hand. "Don't worry President Kruger, I'll always be here for you." she said comfortingly. But Natsuki had toned out and only her thought's filled her ears and her eyes clouded with flashes of her past.

Nina clung tighter to Shizuru as if she was scared to the white-haired woman. Shizuru noticed Nina's behavior and held Nina securely to her. She turned her crimson eyes to Natsuki which was staring to nothing with Arashi holding her hand. She raised a brow at the sight of Arashi holding Natsuki's hand and to her confusion, her heart began to twitch and she had a feeling of aggravation filling in. 'why is that woman holding her hand? And why is Natsuki not swatting it away like she used to do with anyone?' she questioned. She coughed slightly to snap the dazing blunette out of her trance and she smiled when the blunette looked at her curiously. "Is Natsuki-han's hand enjoying the feeling of Artai-han's?" she said with slight venom in her voice. She couldn't decipher why she was feeling bitter at the sight.

Natsuki blinked and tilted her head in confusion of what she heard from the brunette. "What do you mean Viola-san?" she asked. 'Why do I feel like my hand is getting cramped?' she wonders. She looked at her hand and saw another hand holding on hers. She traced the hand to whom it belong and saw a smiling Arashi staring at her. She glared at the snowy-white haired woman and snarled. "Viola-san, could you take Nina out? I'll follow you right after I deal with this." She asked with a bit of anger.

Shizuru complied and walked out to the glass door where a black car was waiting for them with Takeda and Tate standing beside the vehicle. Buts she decided to looked through the glass window to see how Natsuki was going to do.

Natsuki sighed as soon as the two was out of ears reach. She retracted her hand from Arashi's hold and she glared evilly at her. "WHO IN ODIN'S NAME GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO GO ALL DARLING WITH ME YOU DAMN WITCH! TO HELL DO I CARE ABOUT THIS 'MONSTER' CRAP! I AM A KRUGER AND I DO MY JOB!" she yelled out in anger.

Everyone in the lobby felt like a rabid wolf had howled in anger and all of them felt like lambs under the jaws of the wolf. The temperature of the whole lobby seemed to drop into negative as they all looked at their president and vice president facing each other.

Arashi just laughed and patted Natsuki in the head. "Always the prideful one. You know, I still find it cute how you can manage to keep that up and still be all soft to that experiment." She jested. But her laughed died down when she felt a hand on her neck and Natsuki's face only inches from her. She smirked and slapped Natsuki's hand away from her neck. "You know I was kidding Kruger. I adore your little experiments as much as I adore you. You know how I feel towards you and it doesn't change" she flirted.

"Keep that up Artai and I swear I'll do everything to throw you out of this company." Natsuki threatened.

"Is it because of her? Clearly she doesn't feel the same way with you considering she is Kanzaki-san's girlfriend."

Natsuki felt her brows twitch at the obvious but she decided to ignore it and pushed Arashi aside and walked towards the glass door where she saw Shizuru looking rather worried. She exited the building and stood infront of the brunette. "She's vice president of this company." She said and went to the car and opened the door for Shizuru. "Get in."

Shizuru nods her head and entered the car with Natsuki following her afterwards. There were five of them inside. The driver was Tate and Takeda was seated at the front sit while Natsuki and Shizuru were seated at the back with Nina sitting at Shizuru's lap. Natsuki looked at how her daughter was happy with Shizuru and how Shizuru expresses herself openly towards the child.

The journey back to the Kruger apartment was fast and bouncy. Bouncy for the fact that Nina was playing with both her mama and papa while the two men, Takeda and Tate, both suffered from being kicked by the bouncy child. They were only relieved when the child had fallen asleep and the two women are silently looking at their respective windows. The car arrived at Natsuki's garage and they exited the car with Nina in Natsuki's arms. She asked Shizuru to wait for her at the door for she was going to have a chat with the two men.

"Next time Takeda don't lose her OUTSIDE the mansion. It's fine when you lost track of her back in Tokyo mansion but losing her here in Kyoto is a big mistake." Natsuki said harshly as soon as Shizuru had paced towards the door.

Takeda stiffened and went pale hearing Natsuki's anger. He felt cold sweat running down from his pores and body going all frozen at the emerald eyes of Natsuki. "S-sorry Kruger-san. We won't lose her again!" Takeda responded like a soldier answering to his commander. He was still standing stiffly and averting his gaze on the blunette.

"You better be. And you Tate, you're the intelligent one between the two of you, why didn't you pay close attention to my daughter?" she glared at the Tate.

Tate nervously laughed and scratched the back of his head. "I was kinda occupied myself. I was buying Mai a gift."

"As if Mai would accept it. tch! Go to the Kyoto main house and you will stay there every night. You better not do anything to my sister or Miyu and I will kill you." she turned around and gestured Shizuru who was just listening to her by the door to get inside the house.

The both of them went inside and Natsuki walked up to the master's bedroom and had laid Nina to the bed with Shizuru following behind her. Once the blunette had tucked the child in bed she glances up to Shizuru who has a questioning look on her face. She knew her fiancée wanted to know some things and she just silently made her way out of the room with Shizuru trailing behind her back down to the living area. But the brunette made her way to the kitchen first and prepared two hot teas for the both of them and went back to the living area, handing Natsuki a cup of tea.

Natsuki mumbled gratitude towards Shizuru and placed the cup to the coffee table. "I assume you wanna know why your mother knows about this deal?" the blunette asked, plopping down to the couch and leaning her head back to the back rest of the couch.

The brunette took her seat beside her fiancée and took a quick sip of her own tea. "If it's not a problem with Natsuki-han." She said softly.

"Auntie… she knows that you don't like this whole fiancée idea that our grandparents had put up. If we were to do something, we can stop all this acting and go on with our lives." Natsuki explained. She took her cup of tea from the table and blew the steam away and took a sip of it. "Green tea? You're addicted to this stuff Viola-san. One day you'll be charged of 'Tea Addiction'." She said with a chortle. She placed gently shook her cup making the tea swirl inside.

"Ara, I'm not addicted to this. Natsuki Ikezu!" the tea loving Kyoto actress pouted.

Natsuki shrugged at Shizuru's reply. She saw that the brunette was pouting and she couldn't help but feel at fault. She gently placed her tea cup back to the coffee table and tried to make Shizuru stop pouting. Her mind flashed a few strings of her past as she tries to calm her fiancée.

'Mou Natsuki I'm not a tea addict!"

'Yes you are. Someday you're gonna be the first one to have tea addiction as a crime.'

'ikezu! If Natsuki hates me this much, she should tell me and not use tea as an excuse!'

'oi don't cry~ oh man no, no no Shizuru! I don't hell hate you and you know that!'

'*sniff*'

'Okay fine you're not addicted to tea. You just love it. So please don't cry.'

'Ara! I told you I'm not a tea addict. Fufufu. Now Natsuki shouldn't accuse me of such.'

'mou you're faking it!'

"C'mon Viola-san I'm sorry. Look you're not addicted; you just love the damn tea!" Natsuki said, still persuading the brunette to stop crying.

"r-really?" the brunette asked, both hands covering her face. She was also letting out soft sobs and shaking her shoulders.

"Yes, you love them alright." Natsuki said with a sigh. She gently held Shizuru's hands and slightly placed them on the brunette's cheeks. But instead of seeing tears, she saw a wide smile across the brunette's face. "What the hell?! You're faking it!" she bawled.

The brunette giggled and just felt Natsuki's warms hands over her cheeks. "kannin na. But you shouldn't accuse me as such." Somehow, what she said had struck her like it was déjà vu. She shook the thoughts away since it was impossible for her to think it happened before.

'Did she just- nah!' "Whatever. I'll just grab some clothes at the bedroom so that I won't disturb you and Nina. Oh and thank you for letting Nina stay at your room Viola-san." Natsuki said flatly. She stood up and left the brunette.

The brunette calmly took a sip of her tea as the comforting silence engulfs her in the living area. She has both her eyes closed and savored the warmness and the peace that surrounded her. But the earlier thoughts came into her mind. 'Why did I feel like this had already happened before? And that Artai-san, why do I feel hatred to her?' She shook her head and cleared her thoughts about the earlier incidents. She took another sip of her tea and she felt her head starts to twitch in pain. She placed her tea cup down to the coffee table and she gently placed her right hand over her forehead. "ara~" she cried softly, feeling the headache starting to get more painful and her vision starting to darken. She fought the urge of closing her eyes but the pain was making her weak. She slowly closes her eye, succumbing to the pain, but before darkness filled her vision a pair of emerald orbs stared at her in worry until the darkness completely reign her sight. "Nat..suki…" she whispered.

"Shizuru…"

0-0-0

"I'm always alone…" a five year old brunette whispered to the wind. She was sitting on the bench of her family's Tokyo mansion and she was sad for the fact that she had to move to Tokyo from Kyoto.

Her family was currently having a business party in their mansion and because of her father's new friend aswell as her grandfather's orders; they had to move for the time being. She didn't want to speak to any of the other adult's children because they would just treat her nicely because of being a Viola and not as Shizuru. she had develop a façade whenever she faces people that aren't close to her and thus the façade became her shield from the strangers that only see her as the Viola Heiress.

She had become fond of the garden of their mansion. It was always deserted and since she doesn't want to be with anyone, she made the garden her sanctuary. And today, was another day to be in her sanctuary to avoid the strangers who wants only money.

But as she savored the tranquility of her garden, she heard some rusting at the other side of the rose bushes infront of her. She walked towards the rustling noise and everything went dark.

"Where am I?" Shizuru asked aloud, looking at the darkness that surrounds her. She ran around until her feet couldn't run anymore. Feeling the fatigue, she sat down and folded her legs up to her chest and buried her head between them. "I'm alone… Again" she murmured.

"No you're not…" a cold voice echoed in the darkness.

"Yes I am." She replied.

"No you're not. I'm here Shizzy." The voice said again. "So stop crying."

Shizuru raised her head and saw a speck of blue and green at the distance of the darkness. "Who are you?" she asked.

"You're forgetful Shizzy." The voice chuckled. "You once said to me that I'm not alone, now I'm saying the same thing." The voice was rather playful. "No matter what, I'll be here for you, Kyoto-ben Shizuru." the voice ended.

Shizuru stood up and ran towards the colors she saw and hugged the person who has the colors of blue and green. "You're…"

"DAMN! Wake up Kyoto-ben! You're cutting my breathing!" a loud whine echoed at the master bedroom.

"MAMA! Papa can't breathe." A worried Nina said, tugging Shizuru who was hugging Natsuki tightly at the neck.

Shizuru opened her eyes slowly and looked around. She saw she was in bed with Nina looking worried at her and Natsuki locked in her arms, struggling for air. She blinked for a few second before realizing to let go of the blunette. "K-Kannin na Natsuki-han." She apologized, lowering her head to show her apology.

Natsuki, rubbing her neck with her red with black stripes leather gloved hand gently and coughed a little to get back her lost air just waved her hand to the brunette. "Do you hate this arrangement so much that you want to kill me? Cause if so, I'll trust you'll take care of Nina for me or I'll haunt you when I die." The blunette said sarcastically. She was till rubbing her neck and looked at how Shizuru was sorry for what she did. She sighed and placed her red with black stripes leather gloved hand under the brunette's chin and slowly raised her head to the level of her eyes. "Look, I was kidding. You didn't mean it, you were having a nightmare." She explained.

"N-Natsuki-han… kannin na…" Shizuru apologized again.

"It's okay swear. So lay back down in bed and rest. You're headache would be gone now and all you need is rest." Natsuki said comfortingly. She then switched her hand from Shizuru's chin to her shoulders and she gently pushed her down to bed, tucking her under the dark blanket.

Nina, looking worried over her mama lay beside her mama and hugged her. "Mama I'll be here for you. So don't worry okay." Nina said calmly, hoping her small hug cold make her mama feel better. She planted a wet kiss on her mama's cheek and snuggled closer.

Natsuki felt her heart soften upon seeing how her daughter loved Shizuru. She smiled and stood up from the bed and looked at the occupants. "Well I guess you need your rest. I'll be back later for your dindin. Nina honey, take care of your mama okay?" she requested and left when she saw her daughter nodded her head in response.

"Natsuki-han…" Shizuru whispered, looking at the closing door. She looked beside her and smiled when orange eyes were looking worried back at her. She raised her hand from the blanket and hugged the child. "Nina don't worry, mama is fine." She assured, making the child sigh in relief.

"Mama made Papa very worried. I woke up when Papa kicked the door open with mama in her arms. Papa was sweating and looking very funny, with her faces all white-color." Nina said, chuckling as she remembered her Papa carrying her Mama to the bed. She snuggled at her mama's warm arms and deeply inhaled her mama's tea scent her papa's perfume that clung onto the clothes of Shizuru. "mmmh! Mama smells like papa but sweeter." She said happily.

The brunette chuckled hearing Nina's comment about her scent. She does smell like Natsuki together with the scent of her tea. "Ara, I believe my baby is right. Did Nina take care of me when I was in pain?" she asked, stroking Nina's hair.

The child looked up to her Mama and shook her head. "Papa took care of Mama and I helped!" she said happily. "Papa was worried about mama so much. Papa ran to the pharmacy to buy mama's medicine and papa had ripped her leather raven glove because of tighty hold." Nina sat up and tilted her head childishly.

Shizuru sat up aswell and raised a brow. She had noticed that Natsuki was always wearing a leather biker gloves in her left hand and at first she thought it was because of the fact that she rides a bike. But when she sometimes admires her fiancee's attire, she still saw the glove being worn on her left hand. "does Natsuki-han always wear a glove baby?" she asked the child.

"yup! Papa has many gloves. But she always leave one on her left hand."

"why?" the brunette asked again.

Nina placed her small right index finger under her lower lip and thinked of the reason why Natsuki was always wearing a glove. "I think papa just like it. Papa doesn't speak much about it nor does papa wants anyone to see her hand.."

"see? Is there anything at her left hand?" she inquired again.

Nina chuckled and nodded her head. "un! Papa's hiding something there and papa made me promise not to tell. Sorry mama."

Shizuru smiled and patted Nina in the head. "Silly child. You really love your papa huh?"

"Very much! Papa loves me and I love papa back. And now, I love mama too just like papa!" Nina happily declared with a wide smile across her face. "I love both mama and papa. And I bet papa love mama too!"

Shizuru was taken by surprise in what Nina just said but she hid it with her smile. she didn't expect the child to say such things and honestly, she didn't expect the child would accept such relationship. Then she remembered her dream when she was sleeping. 'that dream… it had been years since I dreamt it. who was that child who called me that.' she mentally asked while watching Nina jump up and down in bed.

"NINA! VIOLA-SAN! MAI'S HERE SO DINDIN IS READY!" a loud yell from downstairs echoed throughout the entire house which made Nina and Shizuru giggle a bit.

"Shall we go to your papa and aunt Mai?" Shizuru asked, getting off from the bed and gesturing Nina to come with her. The child jumped off the bed and held her hand as they both exited the room and went down to the kitchen where Natsuki and Mai were already seated at their chairs.

"Well c'mon honey, it's Mai's cooking and I know how much you love her food." Natsuki said with a small smile upon seeing her daughter and Shizuru made their way to the table. She patted the empty chair at her left, signaling her daughter to sit there.

The child nodded and pulled her mama's arm, guiding her to the right side chair that's empty beside her papa. "Ne mama, you sit here with papa and auntie Mai will sit beside me." she flashed a toothy smile making her papa blush, Mai to giggle and Shizuru to just smile.

"Well I see you have a family now Natsuki." Mai taunted.

Natsuki just glared at Mai and snarled softly under her breath. She shook off the blush and maintained her temper infront of her daughter. "Mai should keep her mouth shut before I shut it for her." she was flashing Mai a cynical smile that meant a deadly death to those she flashes it to.

Mai choked a nervous laugh and turned her attention to her food and starts eating it. She didn't want anything to make her life end in an instant at the hands of her friend.

Shizuru watched Natsuki intently, trying to think if the blunette was somehow related to her dream and the feeling of the sudden déjà vu when she's around the blunette. Her sight turned down to Natsuki's left hand that's covered by a red with black stripes leather glove and she wondered what those leathers hides from her. Her crimson eyes traveled up to meet emeralds, staring back at her with a gleam of both confusion and contentment.

"Viola-san, your food will get cold." Natsuki spoke out.

"Shizuru." the brunette said, still gazing at Natsuki's eyes.

"What?"

Shizuru snapped back from her gaze and coughed a little, thinking of an excuse why she had said her own name. "Call me Shizuru, Natsuki-han. We've been engaged, have a child and live in one roof. I think it would be better if you call me by my first name." she put up a façade at the blunette and she saw the blunette twitch at the sudden change of smile.

Natsuki saw the façade. She hated it very much from the actress. She ignored Shizuru's smile and turned her attention to her mayo-filled food. "I think Viola-san would be more appropriate." She said coldly, taking a spoonful of her dinner to her mouth and chewing it lightly before swallowing it.

"Ara? Why?" the brunette asked.

"Yeah Natsuki, why not call her by her first name?" Mai added, focusing her attention to Natsuki who was in her 'ice princess' demeanor. And she knew that when Natsuki's in that behavior, it meant she's serious.

Natsuki looked at Nina who was eating her food and she looked at the other two who was in the same table. She sighed and furrowed her brows. "Because Viola-san wouldn't be with me for too long so why bother." She said coldly, taking another spoonful of her dinner without making eye contact to the two women.

"Natsuki…" Mai said softly.

"Natsuki-han, I can still be your friend." Shizuru said with persistence. She couldn't understand why she wanted the blunette to call her by her first name but she felt that she needed to know and hear how it would turn out. She looked at Natsuki seriously and again, her crimson eyes and the blunette's emerald eyes made contact.

Natsuki looked at Shizuru seriously, covering her heart's rampaging beating. 'I can't call her that! Ever since 'that' incident.' She mentally reminded herself. She inhaled deeply, calming herself down and making sure that she won't cause any ruckus infront of her child. "Just because. For this once please let me do what I want in peace. No pouting." She looked at Shizuru who was about to pout and glared at her. "And no annoying motherly talk about it." she glance over at Mai with a smirk.

"Hey! Watch it Kruger!" Mai whined. She stuck out her tongue to the smirking blunette and then laughed at how childish she was.

"Alright I won't force myself to Natsuki-han." Shizuru said in defeat. She then gave a sweet smile to the blunette and decided to start eating her own food.

Nina looked at her papa and saw her papa blush a little. She giggled and just continued her dinner without making any comment about what she's watching at the adults around her. she was contented at her current situation. Having a papa and mama who loves her so much made her happy. But she felt rather nervous at her papa's secret.