"Show me how to lie, you're getting better all the time. And turning all against the one is an art that's hard to teach," Cooper sang as he came in through the front door. He had just gotten his stitches out finally and was feeling actually kind of cheerful for once. "Another clever word sets off an unsuspecting word. And as you step back in line a mob jumps to their feet. After leaving the hospital he had decided that a change of look was in order. He had cut his hair short and had bleached it blonde, a sharp contrast to shaggy dark hair that everyone was accustomed for him. He had on a blue metallic jacket that really did not go with the black tank top, jeans and Doc Martins that he was rocking. "Now dance fucker, dance. Man, he never had a chance. And no one even knew it was really only you." He walked towards the kitchen, completely oblivious to Taylor coming down the stairs and gawking at his new look. The headphones for his I-pod were tucked quite deep in his ear and the volume was jacked obnoxiously loud. "And now you steal away. Take him out today. Nice work you did. You're going to go far, kid." He went into the kitchen to find Mindy feeding Vanessa. Smirking a bit, he sang even louder to get her attention. "With a thousand lies and a good disguise, hit 'em right between the eyes, hit 'em right between the eyes. When you walk away nothing more to say. See the lightning in your eyes. See 'em running for their lives."
"Bub what the HELL?" Mindy said as she gawked at him with wide eyes.
"Hola Mommadukes." He reached into his pocket and hit the pause button on his I-pod before taking the ear buds out of his hear and letting them hang on his shoulders.
"What the HELL did you do to yourself?"
He pouted his lips and looked down at his clothes. "What? You don't like it?"
"You look like one of those gay alien dudes from Dude Where's My Car!" she declared.
His face twitched at that one. "I do NOT!"
"Do too do too do tooooooooo!" Mindy adjusted Vanessa in her arms and shook her head at him. "You're a total fagtown now."
"Fagtown?"
"Yes."
"That's not even-"
"It is TOO!"
He sighed and just gave up the argument. There was no winning when it came to her. "Where's Dad?" he asked as he sat down next to her.
"Giving Lizzie a bath." She glanced around Cooper and bounced up and down eagerly. "When he comes back we're going to go over my set list for the concert movie and I want to tell him I want to play gigs to warm up for it beforehand." She nodded and cut Cooper off just when he opened his mouth to respond to that. "Ooooh and I have to tell him Made of Stone is gonna be the next single."
"That one?" Cooper said, his eyebrows going up in surprise.
"Yup!"
"Why that one?"
"Because I said so."
Shaking his head slightly he got his I-pod out of his pocket and started skimming through the songs until he came to that particular one. With this news it was now going to be the third single off her album. She had already released What You Want and My Heart is Broken and most thought Lost in Paradise would have been coming next. That one had a shit ton of buzz around it so this choice seemed to be pretty random.
Speak your mind
Like I care
I can see your lips moving
I've just learned not to hear
Don't waste your time
It's never enough for you baby
Don't want to play your game anymore
No matter what you say
I'm all out of love for you baby
And now that I've tried everything
I'll numb the pain til I'm made of stone
"The movie people want to put it on the new Underworld soundtrack," Mindy informed him. "My Jamie gets a movie song."
"Lovely." Turning the I-pod back off Cooper set it aside and ran a hand through his hair. His good mood was evaporating now. Just like he ruined James's mood James ruined his in a matter of seconds and he didn't even know he had done it. "Too bad he don't even LIKE Underworld. He says Kate Beckinsale can't act her way out of a paper bag."
"YOU don't like Kate Beckinsale and that's what YOU say," Mindy pointed, which was true. "Crab apple." She wagged her finger at him and danced around in her seat. "Crabby crabby crabby Cooper is a crabby pants." She wagged two fingers at him now, making little pinchers at his face just to be obnoxious.
"Oh would you stop?" he asked in exasperation. "I think Dad's a terrible influence on you."
"And I think YOU are a crab ass that needs to get LAID," Mindy countered. "I'm taking Taylor to go boy scouting you should go do that too."
"Boy scouting?"
"Mhm. You should attract a lot now that you are a total fagtown."
"Mom!"
"Baby Doll?" Shit. Cooper scooted his chair back away from her as James entered the room. He shot Cooper the dirtiest look he could muster before wrapping an arm around Mindy and kissing the top of her head before giving Vanessa a kiss. "What's going on here?"
"Bub's a crap apple," she announced.
"When is he not?" Another dirty look was shot Cooper's way as he kissed Mindy again, this time on the lips. He had Elizabeth in his free arm, who's wet hair hung loosely down her back. She had on a blue robe with monkey faces on it and when she saw Cooper she immediately blew a raspberry at him and held up her middle finger, which he was sure that James had taught her.
"Hey!"
"Lizzie!" Giggling Mindy took her little hand and nommed on her finger to make her laugh and stop. James just smirked and kissed the toddler's temple before nuzzling his face against Mindy's. "She wants YOU to help pick out her outfit."
"Oh yeah?" Mindy reached up and tickled Elizabeth's belly lightly. "You want MOMMY Lizzie Bear?"
"MOMMY!" Elizabeth stretched her arms out for her so Mindy stood up and traded Vanessa for Elizabeth and then the four of them just left the room, not even acknowledging that Cooper was still there. He watched them go, his good mood REALLY gone now. He hated that he couldn't ever get some time alone with Mindy anymore. She was always up in James and vice versa. One would have thought they were Siamese twins with the way they were connected. It bothered the fuck out of Cooper because he NEEDED Mindy. She was the only one that truly understood him. She was a complete space cadet but she got him. Only one other person had gotten him…Joie…but Joie was not only dead but almost a distant flame compared to what he felt towards Mindy. The only thing stopping him from having Mindy was James, who had the ability to make things a million times worse. It was enough to make him fantasize about James being eliminated from the picture…most of the time at his own hand. That was as far as that went though. He hadn't actually dared to truly consider acting on it. Deep down, as appealing as it sounded, he didn't want to risk failing. James may have been domesticated by Mindy and the kids but there was a bloodthirsty psychopath inside of there. Cooper had found that one out the hard way more than once. As hard headed and stubborn as he was, he wasn't dumb enough to physically try anything against James. He was scared straight on THAT front at least.
He got up and started to go towards his room when a loud shriek from the living room made him about jump out of his skin. It sounded like a woman was getting skinned alive in there so he went in there to see what the hell was going on. What he found was Chelsea and Connor sitting with Stickers, Fievel and Snoopy, watching The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. The pair had on 3D glasses and Chelsea was shoveling marshmallows in her mouth by the handful while Connor was devouring potato chips.
"What in the world…" Cooper said under his breath.
"SSSSHHHHHHHHHH!" they both ordered at the same time.
Cooper blinked and stared at them for a moment longer before shaking his head and leaving the room. There were no words.
…
"Have you taken a pregnancy test yet?" James asked Mindy as they drove. They were in his charcoal Lamborghini (as usual) and he had one hand on the wheel and the other was holding hers. He had on a dark blue t-shirt, black sunglasses, cargo pants and a pair of ugly brown shoes that he wore pretty much everywhere. He did have other shoes, much better looking shoes, yet these were the ones he insisted on wearing everywhere. Mindy gave him shit about it nonstop but he insisted that they were comfortable and saw no reason to change.
"Not yet," she replied. She was dressed in a purple button up shirt James owned, black leggings with her Uggs and a pair of his sunglasses hanging off the collar of his (and now hers) shirt. "Next week I will."
He smiled and kissed each one of her fingers one by one. Yes they still needed it to be actually confirmed but at this point, given their history, the test was just a formality. They were sure she was carrying their fourth child. It made him giddy inside to even think about that. His only regret was that ALL the babies weren't biologically his-though he pretended they were. He liked living with the thought of there never being a Mark or a Kane or Annabelle or anyone else. There had only been him and Mindy from the very start.
He pulled up to the little café they were having lunch at, glaring at the paparazzi that dared to be around them. "Remember to behave now," Mindy reminded him lightly while waving to the cameras. "You have to be nice to George now. Stacy likes him very much you cannot tell him how much you don't like his acting."
"He don't even ACT," James lamented. "It's George Clooney as George mother fucking Clooney in every single movie he's in!"
"Yeah well he is Stacy's boyfriend and you have to be nice anyway." She poked his chest and gave him a stern look. "You will be nice right? You wouldn't be a MEAN Jamie now would you?"
"Me? Never." He kissed her and rubbed noses with her.
"Maybe you and George could be friends and then we could have more double dates."
"Let's not go THAT far…" The friends he had once upon a time were either dead or he really never saw them and quite frankly, he had no interest in making more-especially with THAT type of crowd. He had Mindy and the kids and that was enough for him.
They kissed for a few more minutes before getting out of the car and going into the café. Stacy and George were already waiting for them and Stacy and Mindy both squealed loudly at the sight of each other. They hugged and started talking a mile a minute and paparazzi zoomed in with their cameras, taking pictures through the windows. James stood there, spending most of the time shoveling food into his mouth and only really speaking when asked something. He felt like the odd one out in this situation and the paparazzi were annoying the fuck out of him. For the most part he was used to them by now but today they were worse than normal today. One of the biggest actors in the country combined with one of the biggest acts in music at the same place at the same time made for huge buzz. He personally thought that if people had time to be that interested in who was eating lunch with who then they needed a life in the worst way but whatever. He just stuck by Mindy and got them a giant strawberry float to share and actually sent the waiter back to get her a purple crazy straw when it wasn't brought out the first time. That would probably make a headline all in itself but he didn't give a shit. His wife was getting a fucking crazy straw and that was that.
…
"Connor STOP trying to run with that stick!" Taylor yelled at the wild man child that promised to behave yet didn't. While Mindy and James were out at lunch she had taken the others to the park. Unfortunately, it wasn't going as smoothly as she wanted it to. She had Aiden and Vanessa to take care of and Amber thankfully took Elizabeth and Chelsea and they were playing on the slides together. Connor and the twins though were running wild. They had originally been playing kick ball but then Connor had kicked the damn ball all the way across the park, which made the twins mad and they had been pummeling him with their little fists until he grabbed a stick, which he was now chasing them with.
"THEY started it!" Connor shot back.
"We did NOT!" Thorn yelled.
"Yeah!" Scarlett agreed. "He's LYING Taylor! Don't believe him!"
"I'm NOT LYING!"
"I don't care who started it!" Taylor shot back. "You put that stick down NOW and settle down before I end it!"
Connor let out a defiant war cry and kept right on going. Taylor took a step towards him to make him knock it off but Oxa ran interference instead. She sank her teeth into Connor's pant leg and tripped him up, sending him face first on the ground.
"Yeah!" Thorn cheered. "GOOD Oxa!"
"STUPID CAT!" Connor yelled as he sat up. "I hate you!"
"Well she hates you MORE!" Scarlett countered.
"Guys…" Taylor let out a long sigh and ran a hand through her hair. Why couldn't they ever have a trip somewhere without this stuff happening? Was that too much to ask?
"Excuse me, is this yours?"
Taylor turned around and saw a guy standing behind her, holding the ball Connor had kicked. He looked to be a little over six feet tall, green eyes and brown hair that was almost completely shaved down. The white tank top he was wearing showed off how muscular his arms were. The first thought that came to mind was 'meathead'. Total and complete meathead. He was a somewhat cute one at least though. And while muscular, he wasn't as obnoxiously big as some of the ones she had run across before.
"Yes it is!" Scarlett said, tossing her nose up in the most prissy matter as she took the ball from him. "THANK you very much."
He grinned and nodded at her. "You're welcome." His attention shifted back to Taylor, who had picked up Aiden and was checking on Vanessa (who was sitting comfortably in her stroller). "Siblings?"
She nodded. He was checking her out and she was internally cringing because she didn't think she looked THAT great. She had make-up on but not that much and she had on a plain gray t-shirt and dark blue capris…she was expecting to just lounge around with the kids she hadn't been planning on running into a guy. "I'm babysitting while Mom and Dad are out."
"Wooow…I only got a sister I don't know how you do this." He held out his hand. "Trevor by the way."
"Taylor." She took his hand and shook it and the twins apparently took that as a cue to butt in.
"I'm SCARlett," the little priss said, grabbing Trevor's hand and shaking it daintily. "THAT is my stupid sister Thorn."
"YOU'RE stupid," Thorn snapped, elbowing Scarlett in the gut before making the rest of the introductions herself. "This is OXA," she pointed to Oxa who was eyeing Trevor distrustfully. "And that's stupid Connor" Connor stuck his tongue out at her while pulling grass out of the ground and throwing it up in the air. "And that's Aiden and Vanessa and Amber and Chelsea and Lizzie."
"NO BOY!" Elizabeth yelled, grabbing a pebble and attempting to throw it at him. It completely missed yet she still blew a raspberry at him and stuck her thumbs in her ears, wiggling the rest of her fingers at him.
"Nice to meet you all." He was trying his best to seem sincere but his attention clearly was more on Taylor than anything else. "You guys come here a lot?"
Taylor eyebrows rose at that lame line. "I spend my time babysitting a boat load of children. What do you think?"
"I've never seen you here before."
"Clearly you haven't looked hard enough."
"Clearly I should have." His deep voice had a hint of a southern accent to it. "I've been missing out." He shoved his hands in his pockets and his lips turned up into a little half smile. "You got a boyfriend?"
"No she don't," Scarlett said, answering before Taylor could say a word. "She's niiiice and single." Taylor could have strangled her but held on to Aiden more tightly to refrain from doing so.
Trevor's smile got bigger at those words. "You doing anything tonight Taylor?"
"Ummm…that'll depend if the parental patrol have plans."
"Well how about tomorrow? Give 'em some advance notice and I could take you out."
Amber and the twins immediately all stared intently at Taylor, who kind of felt stuck now. She wasn't exactly in to this guy. She had known him for all of about five minutes and while he was cute he didn't really do much for her. Yet at the same time, what did she have to turn him down for? Another night being stuck at home with the girls? Another night of pining over Cooper, who clearly wasn't interested in her. Maybe going out and seeing other guys was the key to getting over him. "Okay," she agreed. "Sounds good."
"NO!" Elizabeth yelled. "Daddy says NO BOYS!" She ran up to Trevor before Amber could grab her and kicked him as hard as she could "NO PENIS!"
Trevor let out a little yelp of pain and gave her a flabbergasted look while Taylor pretty much died of embarrassment on the spot.
