Well, folks, here comes chapter 8! I know, I promised to have it finished quite a while ago, but I was really busy - and btw, it's quite a long chapter anyway, so hopefully that will bring me back in your good books.
It's a pretty action-packed chapter, but also very dramatic!
Please, please, peeps, REVIEW AND COMMENT, it's so sad to literally write my ass off for each chapter and then no one takes the time to leave at least a little comment.
Please, be kind! Give me reviews and comments!
8. Fight to Resist
After this moment of realisation it had all happened quite fast.
They both had forced themselves on their feet after the first wave of pain had been shut out by sheer power of concentration – there had been no need to pass on the information of what had happened to Leah, Sam had quickly picked up his thoughts – and then, from one moment to another, they had left his house, and left all those thoughts and worries about a hybrid and imprinting behind. All their thoughts were solely focused on their sister now as they ran like hell through the woods, the air tasting like pure fire in their lungs but they kept running.
Jacob hardly realised how much ground they had already covered when the rest of the two packs – which were already phased into their wolf forms as they had picked up this most familiar scent that presented danger – joined them. The young Alpha couldn't pluck up the courage to answer Seth's urgent questions in his mind after he had changed into his wolf shape, too (Sam followed soon after him), he just couldn't bring it over himself to tell his little brother that his sister was most likely about to die – and he couldn't pluck up the courage to tell Seth that this had been his fault.
The guilt was nagging at him, adding to the self-hatred and shame he felt towards what he had done to his imprintee – now he was responsible for the very likely death of his sister, his Beta, too. It was true, there was no denial possible, his conscience screamed constantly at him. If he hadn't rounded up on her like that, if he hadn't been such an ass, throwing all those stupid accusations at her – she would never have left like this: running through the woods, feeling guilty, so consumed by her fear of having hurt him. It had turned her into such an easy victim.
It didn't take much time to imagine what had happened. Leah probably had run into him out of pure coincidence, but instead of calling for aid, instead of accepting that she alone would never have stood a chance against that Bloodsucker, possibly hoping with killing that leach off she could get back into Jacob's good books again, she had attacked. Distracted and consumed by her own feeling of guilt, she probably hadn't been focused enough, she had lost control and the Bloodsucker had seized his chance. He must have hurt her, and as she had phased back into her human shape automatically, and then taken advantage of her helpless situation.
But no matter how hard he growled in his throat, lusting to rip that Bloodsucker into pieces there remained a truth he could not undone and which burned inside him: It had been his fault.
The scent and the fear for their sister's life spurred them on and on, pulling them deeper and deeper into the forest until Jacob realised where the smell finally led them to. It felt like cold water was slowly spilled over his figure, tormentingly dripping down his shoulder, icy even through the fur, as the realisation slowly sank in. It was leading them towards that dreadful clearing he had grown to hate so much, the clearing that had destroyed everything between him and Renesmee.
It was in this moment that a question popped up into his head that made him falter in his steps and he had a hard time avoiding to tumble over his own feet; that question hit the air out of his lungs, filling ii with icy water instead that made every breath he took feeling like he sucked in ice instead of air.
Had Renesmee been the Vampire who had bitten Leah?
But that was impossible, he tried to calm himself – he could not bear to even think that his Renesmee would be capable of something like that – as he subconsciously sped up his pace so that he outran his other brothers. Renesmee was a hybrid, and it was clear that she had no venom whatsoever that could have been poisonous – if she had, he would have been killed by her a thousand times, for she had bitten him so often when she had been a toddler.
However, this thought could not convince him completely. The time she had been away had changed Renesmee in may ways; her overgrown thirst for blood, expressed in her constant desire to hunt and slay, was only one thing that had changed, but that wasn't the only thing. Before she had been away she would never had hurt or killed if it hadn't been necessary, but the memory of the cave she had shown him had proved him that indeed there lived a predator behind those innocent brown eyes. Could it be that those months she had been away had not only changed her behaviour but her physical features also – turning her even poisonous?
Had it turned her more and more into Vampire?
Jacob shook his head, trying to shake off those terrible thoughts as well but it was hard to concentrate on anything at all with all the thoughts and fears of the others werewolves revolving around in his head, almost deafening him. He could feel their anger, their fear and concern, but most of all he felt their panic – time was like an invisible enemy and they all feared to be defeated by it. Again, he sped up his pace, his heart racing in his chest – he knew he would never be able to forgive himself, to look into the mirror again, or to look into Seth's eyes, or Sam's, or to face anyone back at the reservation. He knew he would never be able to forgive himself if she died, for it would be his fault.
The scent of blood was so close now that it burned in their noses, and that it mixed up with this typical Vampire stink made it even more unbearable. However, they did not twitch back from this revolting mixture sweet stink and the terrifying note of the blood of someone they all deeply cared for. They followed the trace eagerly, mentally preparing themselves to fight, even rejoicing in the prospect of ripping the Bloodsucker into pieces who had dared to threaten the life of one of them.
An eye for an eye – and the call for revenge roared in all of them.
Jacob was almost the first one to reach the clearing, the only one who was actually faster than him was Sam. The black wolf threw himself immediately on the ground to Leah, he howled in pain with her as he desperately tried to lick away the blood that streamed out of the disgustingly looking semi-circled wound at her left wrist, but he twitched back from the bitter taste of the venom. Leah lay on the ground, so close to the edge of the line trees surrounding them, she possibly had tried to escape her attacker but then pain had been too strong, too overwhelming for her body to act on her mind's order: she couldn't escape. She was still wriggling in electrifying agony as she twitched on the ground, her screams of pain already muffled down to incomprehensible growls, her eyeballs turned inside – she was completely blinded by her pain.
With Sam as their Alpha totally gripped by his concern and pain for Leah, the other wolves turned to the only other person of authority they accepted. The big wolf with the russet fur that was Jacob stepped away from Sam and Leah, he scanned the clearing for the monster they had come to destroy and when his eyes found what they had been looking for the shock hit him so hard that he subconsciously retreated some steps.
There in the middle of the clearing stood not Renesmee as he had feared. The Vampire that looked more like a young, handsome man stared back at the pack of wolves, an evil grin shining on his lips, which were drenched in the blood of an innocent – and he still looked at him with the same, red eyes. Eyes that had once taken away his loved one, and changed Renesmee for ever.
Cillian.
So Renesmee had not killed him, she had lied to him – what else did she lie about?
Angered and blinded with rage – though he wasn't entirely sure if his fury was only reserved for the Bloodsucker in front of him or if he indeed felt rage also towards his imprintee, whose lies had unconsciously, possibly led to this tragedy – the wolf Jacob made a determined step towards the young man with the face of an angel, but with the devil's soul incarnate.
He wanted to kill him. The wolves growled deep in their throats, they had picked up his feelings and thoughts, maybe they had realised as well who that Bloodsucker really was. His brothers were now stepping beside him, lowering for the attack, their muscles tensing in a simultaneous act – the connection between them vibrating, making them think, making them feel as one wolf, but with the strength of thousand wolves. Jacob uttered another deep growl, and this was the signal to attack, but then –
All of them – except Sam who, still in his wolf form, was at Leah's side – turned their heads at the same time, even the Bloodsucker couldn't but be distracted by the rustling sound that come from between the line of trees surrounding them, a deliberate sound of crunching dried leaves under usually careful, light feet. There, slowly stepping outside the shadow of the oaks, hesitantly entering the clearing, was the person he had feared most to turn up in this moment.
Renesmee did not look at him when she carefully crossed the clearance; her eyes were entirely focused on the Vampire who eyed her with a greedy, almost hungry look and she swallowed hard when she finally came to a halt. She had her back turned at Jacob and the pack, facing the Vampire she had come to known so well, who stood now still a couple of yards away from her. In contrast to him, however, she did not smile, her face showed no emotion at all, except perhaps it contained a hint of fear but she worked hard to suppress the feeling from taking over or showing it off to him.
Jacob growled deep in his throat and him being a wolf at the moment made it sound even more dangerous; he kept his eyes fixed upon Renesmee who hadn't so much as moved to look at him, as if she was hardly aware of the presence of the whole pack, as if she hadn't noticed Leah lying in agony on the ground, facing death – as if she didn't care. However, deep in his heart he shamefully had to admit that the pain inside did not come from her apparent indifference to what had happened to Leah, but rather the monster inside him roared at the sight of her approaching the Bloodsucker, just as she had done it all those months before.
Was she going to join him again?
Jacob could not but growl again at the pain and anger that flashed through him at the very thought of it, and he looked from the small of Renesmee's back to the Bloodsucker who smiled at the woman he loved, smiled at her as if she was his. Apparently, Vamp Boy must have thought the same, for he made a small step towards Renesmee, his hands stretched out towards her, beckoning her, luring her to come to him again.
"My Love."
The words sounded like pure venom in Jacob's sensitive wolf ears, though they had been spoken as soft as the falling of a leaf, melodic, tender, intimate; a monster awakened in Jacob Black and this beast had nothing to do with the wolf inside him. Jealousy. This monster had been put to sleep years ago, he hadn't felt its roar in such a long time – and then the Bloodsucker had forced his way into his life and taken the only thing from him he truly ever wanted. He had possessed her, possessed her in a way that could never be undone – he had soiled her with his darkness, and marked her in a way that had left traces on her once beautiful, pure soul.
"Stay away from my family. You won't hurt them. Leave."
Jacob was torn out of his thoughts when he heard her speak those words, unwilling to lose himself in false hope again – surely he must had misunderstood her – and yet hope was already nagging at his heart as he stared at her little figure, her back still turned towards him. She was not going to leave with the Bloodsucker. She was not going to side with the Bloodsucker. She was remaining at his – Jacob's – side, and in this moment this choice meant so much more: it was as if she hadn't just simply chosen to fight this Vampire in particular, but to fight the darkness inside her in general.
"Your family? They are nothing but humans. They are weak.", Cillian voice was cold, a cruel smile decorating his lips and with a movement of his head he threw a contemptuous look at the wolves growling behind Renesmee in order to emphasise his words. Then after a moment, the smile vanished and his eyes appeared to burn in a cold fire that lusted greedily for the woman in front of him; as he spoke again his voice sounded rawer now, raw with hunger and possessiveness.
"We both know you are nothing like them."
Though he still could see nothing but her back, Jacob noticed that she retreated several small steps at the words of the Vampire, spoken so low, almost as a whisper. Her figure appeared to shiver in warm sunshine, and he heard her hiss sharply. What the Cillian had said, had apparently stirred a forbidden memory inside her and he could almost feel a pain emanating from her that was in no way physical.
"Leave.", her answer was short and hard, she sounded breathless and Jacob could literally see how her usually soft and welcoming features hardened into a threatening mask, the shadow of the monster inside her reflected on her face for the glimpse of a second. She made a determined step towards him, supporting her order with this little gesture – and for the first time the expression on the Vampire's face changed.
Cillian's eyes narrowed, not so much as a response to her order, rather because of something Jacob hadn't been able to notice; the gesture had been so small, so subtle, so easy to miss. But the Vampire hadn't missed that her eyes had flickered – for the slightest of moments – to the wolf with the russet fur. Cillian, now, no longer looked at her with greed and hunger, anger flashed in his eyes and – though it could have been a trick of light as well – betrayal, and even jealousy.
All of the sudden, the Vampire's head flung to the side, his red, bloodthirsty shifting from the hybrid towards the wolf pack, no – he was looking at Jacob. The wolf with the russet fur twitched back from the lethal intensity of the Bloodsucker's stare and he could hear a deep, inhuman growl escape out of the throat of that Vamp Beau. Cillian glared at the wolf and he felt the anger inflaming his ice-cold body; it that moment he understood the feelings she had rather for that dog than for him.
"Do you really think he loves you?"
The cruel words had left his mouth just a second before he averted his eyes from Jacob and looked at her again in order to watch her reaction, and to savour the despair he had unleashed in her. The air left her mouth through clenched teeth, voiced in a hissing sound, a sound of sheer and utter pain; and it was in that moment that Jacob turned his look from the Bloodsucker over to Renesmee. She was now visibly shaken in what sounded like sobs; and it was then that it hit him – had the Vamp Boy really just referred to him?
"Little Bird, he cannot love you when he's afraid of you."
The next words tore Jacob out of his thoughts and he watched in shock as Renesmee's figure slowly sank down on her knees, her face buried shamefully in her hands as she tried to muffle down the tears and sobs that appeared to have overpowered her at this point. His words had broken her. His pet name for her, which had once amused her, terrified her now, for it spoke of a secret that was only between the two of them – it spoke of a truth she could not deny.
"But I have loved you, my way.", the voice of the Bloodsucker sounded soft again, warm and gentle, as if he was apologising for his cold, hard words only seconds ago, as if she was a naïve child that came to the comforting hand after being beaten by that very outstretched hand.
But Renesmee was no child any more, the world had made sure of that.
She looked up, her face blurred by tears and the pain of a truth she had long tried to deny, but upon his words there was also another emotion that burnt in her eyes, making them glow, flash in a determined fire: defiance. Next to her sides, her hands were clenched to small fists, the force was so strong that she felt her nails scratching the skin of her palms, but she gave no thought to it. She slowly rose to her feet again, her look did not waver from his figure once – and whatever he read in her eyes outraged him.
"Don't tell me you did not enjoy it, don't tell me you did not crave for it – I gave you freedom." he roared now, his eyes so red darkened to a dangerous colour of black, it was impossible to tell if it was the hunger or anger screaming out of those eyes at her – maybe it was even both. Cillian made another step towards her, a deep growl escaping his throat as he glared at her; her consistent ingratitude for what he had given, for what he had offered her angered him. Had he not freed her from her miserable existence amongst the humans? Had he not blown away those ties of morals and conscience that had tormented and tamed her? – And how did she thank him? Running off, running back to those dogs disguised as humans; and now she repaid his great gifts with threatening to attack him?
"But you will never be free here, only another wild animal locked up." he resumed, letting his eyes wander around, focusing on the wolf with the russet fur for only the glimpse of a moment. When he looked back at her he could see the traces of realisation flickering through those brown orbs, knowing that the truth of his word could not be denied. However, this hybrid was strong-willed and determined, her jaw was clenched, she looked at him with eyes hard as stone and cold as ice, but he could still read the disturbed emotions in them. His words had hurt her, they had brought back the memories of what they had done, of what they had shared – and yet she was willed to fight him; not just him, but rather the Vampire inside herself.
"This is my last warning, I will not hesitate to kill you. Leave." she said and when she spoke those words, she let them sound, for the first time, like a real threat. The silence that followed upon her order clung heavy in the air, and Cillian stared at her, his dark eyes glaring at her intensely as if he force with it to take back her warning; but she did not give in. Renesmee breathed hard and flat now, the tension between them growing on and on, making it hard to breathe, afraid that every movement could break loose a storm that would overpower them all.
"Then come, my Love." Cillian said then all of the sudden; a welcoming smile on his perfect, angelic lips, and he stretched out one of his ice-cold hands, beckoning her to come to him.
"Come to die."
There was a moment of silence, a moment of complete stillness, where no one dared to move, not even dared to breathe out of fear, and then –
Cillian stormed towards her with a growl so deep and threatening as if the sky had chosen to imitate his anger – pure thunder seemed to escape his throat, and he lunged at her with claws as quick and terrifying as the lightnings that struck, like flashes of light, too quick and sudden to be caught, but their impact was always fatal. She had barely enough time to avoid his attacks; he was fast, so much faster than her, but she was light and agile and she was determined to use that little advantage.
She was well aware that there was no way she could possibly overpower him, his strength and speed were clearly superior to hers, the experiences of centuries enabling him with fighting abilities she surely didn't possess. But she was determined, she would fight, she would stand her ground, she would defend her family; that at least she owed them. She would not run again, she wouldn't flee like the coward she had been; no, she would stay right here, where she belonged, between her family and the darkness that threatened them.
Cillian stared at her with a most devilish smile that made ice-cold shivers run down her back – fear gripped her so hard she could barely breathe, she could barely think; but she swallowed down her fears and prepared herself for his next attack. She lowered her body, almost crouching down into a defensive position, every muscle in her body contracting at the prospect of upcoming blow. He came after her again, she avoided his claws, dodging and jumping away, every time he only missed her by a hair's breadth. She could feel him, his growing impatience, his increasing anger, his temper so easily taking over – she knew it made him unpredictable, it made him careless, vulnerable.
Renesmee jumped away from his next away by doing an impressive version of a back flip, however she had not counted on his immense speed this time, and then it happened: his arms lunged forward and grabbed her torso – she was trapped. She felt his ice-cold breath in her neck, the fine hairs in her neck raising up in fear, and for a moment she was paralysed by her shock and panic stopped her thinking dead for a beat or two. It was only when she felt his cool, deadly lips on her throat, lips to kiss, lips to kill, that she awoke out of her catatonic trance.
With the strength that was somewhere left in her body she fought against him; with her back she pushed back, flinging her head blindly back in the moment, crashing the back of her skull into his face – she ignored the urge to vomit at the disgusting sound of breaking bones – and with that second of his distraction she tried to free herself. She felt his arms slacken around her body, but one of his arms still kept a steel-like grip on her left upper arm and as she managed it to wriggle herself out of his clutches she felt the terrible pull – the ripping, the breaking, the pain.
As her agonizing pain erupted into the sky she had already jumped several feet away from her, she was panting, her breathing hard and flat, her face contorted in pain and she looked over to her dark angel. His face now grimaced into a terrible grin, even more terrible because half of his face was disrupted and ripped apart by her little head-butting technique – in this moment he looked more terrifying than anything else she had ever encountered in all her life. Her heart skipped a beat and as she looked into his bright, red eyes it was as if she saw her own death reflected in it. She shook her head, unwilling to accept it, shrugging it off as a trick of light, though she moaned in agony as the pain in her left reminded her at possible truth of what she had seen in his eyes.
On that clearing, though, she was not the only one who was desperately in pain at the moment, however, this was quite a different sort of pain. Jacob was wildly struggling against his brothers who tried to hold him back and stop him from storming over to Renesmee – it took three of them alone to keep him where he was; there knew full well they wouldn't be able to stop when he really started to fight them off. His eyes were widened in shock and pain as he saw and heard how she fought her way out of the beast's claws, the terrible sound of breaking bones burning itself right into his ears and the image, this image of her left arm, now hanging uselessly at her side, the limb sticking out in a strange, unnatural angle.
No, Jake. You can't storm in there. It's too dangerous – You'll only make it worse for her...
Jacob tried to shrug off his brothers' warnings, he didn't want to listen to whatever they had to say, he didn't want to listen to reason – could they not understand? This was his Renesmee, and she was about to be killed, right in front of his eyes – how could they expect him to step aside and watch her die? The thought made him whine in pain and he threw himself with his full weight against his brothers, trying to escape their arms once more, but they would not let him away; they, though, would not step aside to let him get himself killed.
Then all of the sudden, the terrible silence of the clearing was broken once more, all of their attention – Jacob was interrupted in his consistent attempts to free himself out of his brothers' grip, Renesmee and Cillian were torn out of their silent staring contest – was drawn towards the shaking figure on the woody floor. Leah let go of another eardrum-shredding scream that left them all shudder in pain and disgust; except for the monster who had put her in this condition in the first place. Cillian's head flung to the side, his red eyes flashing in hunger, and he licked his lips already when he made a greedy towards the girl on the ground, but then –
Renesmee stormed forward and with the full strength of her body weight she tackled him, the immense force of her attack tossing them both to the ground; she struggled with him, and this time it appeared that her agility gained the upper hand. She managed it to push him on the ground and hold him down; her legs were anchored on either side of his hips, her hands holding his arms down in a grip made of steel – he was in her grip now and he could not escape.
Breathing hard, the pain in her left arm making her feel slightly dizzy she stared down at her defeated monster; her brown eyes, now hardened in fury and hatred, bored themselves into his red orbs, though the expression in them had vanished and had been replaced by a completely new look. A plea as old as the world itself looked up to her; there was fear written all over his face, fear and hope; for a second she was reminded of all the things they had shared, all the feelings she had experienced through him – and remembered this atmosphere of fascination that radiated from him. She swallowed hard and it was in this moment that she knew she could not kill him.
Renesmee had lingered in her hesitation for only a glimpse of a second but it had been enough for him to take advantage of her impulse of mercy: with one single, swift movement he tore his hands out of her clutch and simultaneously he jerked up; and then he descended upon her. His fangs sharp as blade of knife flung themselves into her throat, his teeth easily biting through the soft, warm skin. She screamed in shock rather than in pain, but that was about to change; his arms came around her body, holding her captive as he buried his teeth deep into her flesh while he threw her now to the ground, pressing her small figure into the woody floor.
She tried to fight him off but his weight was so mercilessly crushing her down; she felt the hot blood running down her shoulders, the sharpness of his teeth once more and this unnatural feeling of sucking, a pain so indescribable that it took her breath away, an experience so intense that it thrilled her just as it terrified her. Though she was completely blinded by her pain and captivated in her shock, she was still able to hear those screams, strangely human screams, a voice so deep, so familiar...
It was Jacob's voice – Jacob who, in his pain for her, unable to control himself, had phased back into his human form – that tore her out of her helpless trance; she pulled up her knee in an act she hadn't learned form her existence as a Vampire and rammed it up between his thighs. The effect was immediate; Cillian for a moment caught in his pain, his face distorted in agony, lifted his head to growl in anguish and anger – even if he was not human, he was still a man after all, and even a Vampire felt such a monster kick.
Renesmee used his condition of momentary distraction and pushed him off her; he rolled several feet away, and she did not even dare to take another look at him, she just wanted to get away from him. In her panic and pain she abandoned all thoughts of her being half a Vampire, she forgot that she had inhuman strength and speed, forgot that she was a killer incarnate; in this moment she was as helpless as a human and in her desperation she tried to crawl towards the rescue that Jacob Black's eyes represented. But she didn't come far.
"You can not run from me, little Bird." she heard him say from several feet away, and his cruel voice tempered with such lethal sweetness made her freeze on the spot; her heart stopped dead for a beat or two when her ears caught the sound of light steps approaching her. He was inevitably drawing closer, "I've already told you that."
In this moment of helplessness, this moment where the realisation dawned that struggling was pointless and that her destiny had been sealed the second she had decided to fight him, in this moment she looked up to meet Jacob's eyes for the very last time. She read anguish and shock in his warm, brown eyes, now filled with tears, she could feel his pain that was displayed on his handsome human face as her own. With her last strength she put all those unsaid things into her glance, things she had never had the chance to say, truths that would now never be revealed. Her eyes were silently asking for forgiveness, apologising for her weakness, for what she had done to him, apologising that she hadn't had the strength to fight and live.
But then something happened she hadn't expected; while she had stared into Jacob's eyes something happened to her; she had already accepted her faith, had already welcomed death with the desperate hope of a heaven beyond this hell, when suddenly there was a fire that returned to her body, that inflamed her soul – life was returning to her, and the will to fight, to survive burned her weaknesses down to ash and bone. Her eyes, formerly closed in the anticipation of her upcoming death, flung open, her orbs once of a warm, brown colour were darkened to pitch black stones, and a red fire burnt in them. The human in her had failed, was defeated, shattered, but the Vampire in her was not yet ready to give up; she was not ready to die.
Cillian, who hadn't noticed the change in her body, had approached her with the look of hunger in his eyes, ready to take his prize and to finally be able to devour his long-denied prey. But just in the moment when he grabbed her shoulders, attempting to tear her around and to satisfy his greedy thirst for her blood, she suddenly jerked up and flung around. In this one surprising moment she was too fast for him, he screamed as she threw herself upon him, her teeth sinking deep into his stone-hard, cold skin.
He struggled in her grip, his arms flailing around, hitting her head with the force of an iron baseball bat, but she did not loosened her steel-like grip on him no matter how hard he tried to fight her. She then jerked back, and his eardrum-shredding scream accompanied her and she simultaneously tore out a massive chunk of flesh; a huge, bloody, ugly-looking wound gaped open at his throat and his screams were minimised to agonizing growls. A deep, wild roar escaped her throat and with that she flung her teeth back into his flesh, sinking her deadly, though not poisonous, fangs into his ice-cold skin, again and again.
Big, terrifying wounds littered now his throat, and arms, even his naked chest had been attacked by her sharp teeth; he still tried to fight her, but struggling was pointless. She had already passed the point long ago where she could have stopped, he had killed the mercy in her, and he now had to pay the prize for it – and with that she sunk her teeth for the last time into his throat. Another jerk of her head and then with a sound of ripped apart flesh and broken bones his head gave away, his body fell to the ground while his head rolled away from him.
It was done.
For a moment, there was nothing but silence.
Her head lay back, her face turned towards the sky above her, her eyes closed and she took a deep breath of the now fresh and free air that slowly filled her lungs, before she let go of a deep, long sigh and simultaneously she let go of all the worries, fears and pain that had tormented her only mere minutes ago. The agonizing pain in her left air, and the wound in her neck, appeared to hurt less, and when she opened her eyes again, an aura of peace and deep tranquillity filled her. She swayed in the chilly air for only another moment, the blood – hers and his' – glued now cold at her skin, before she finally collapsed and fell to the ground.
However, before she could have hit the ground, a pair of strong arms of the colour of russet skin caught her, and held her safely, keeping her from falling. The first thing her eyes saw, after she managed to open her heavy lids again, were Jacob's eyes who looked at her with so much concern and pain, so full with a warm, deep feeling of affection that she couldn't turn away from him. He held her in his arms as if she was the most precious thing, careful, as if she could break with every to rough touch. She felt so light in his arms, she looked so weak, so vulnerable, like the little bird she had been claimed to be, her wings broken – but she was still alive, and right now that was all that mattered to him.
He looked down into her warm, brown eyes – the monster that had flashed in them only minutes ago had vanished as quickly as it had come – and his heart sheer sprang apart because of all the joy he felt; she was still alive, still warm and soft in his arms, she was still his'. For a few terrible minutes he had thought he had lost her forever; seeing her struggle in such agonizing pain had nearly driven him insane, he hadn't been able to think clearly, he hadn't been able to breathe. But now that he held her in his arms again, now that she looked at him again with those eyes, he enjoyed the wonderful sensation of sweet air filling his lungs again.
What was even more, when he now looked down into her eyes, he did not encounter the bitterness and hardness any more she had worn since she had come back, gone was the cold, heartless woman who had sought to hurt him, who had fought to make him hate, make him fear her – she was warm, and soft...and she was Renesmee again, his Renesmee. He was barely aware of the tears that streamed down his face – though tears of joy now – and just when she slowly raised her right hand to touch his face, her fingers suddenly wet, did he noticed it. Jacob laughed desperately happy and gave into her rare, tender touch.
There intimate moment, however, was all of the sudden interrupted when Sam stormed towards them and without a word of excuse or the like he grabbed Renesmee by her arm – her broken, left arm, to be precise – and tried to drag her with him. She yelped in pain and Jacob – one arm still around her figure, keeping her pressed tight against his body, keeping her in his safe embrace – shoved him away with one single push of his other hand. He glared furiously at his former Alpha – it was clear by the expression of threat in Jacob's eyes that he would rip him to pieces if he dared to touch Renesmee again like that – but Sam didn't seem to see the angry look of warning in his eyes.
"You. Save her.", those stammered words were everything he could bring himself to say; his voice sounded weak, pleading even, like a person insane with thirst, begging for a sip of water in the wide, empty desert. It was this strange tone in his voice that made Jacob look at him, really look at him and he swallowed hard as faced the pure desperation in the usually so controlled Alpha's eyes.
Jacob was so shocked by what he saw in his eyes, he didn't realise that Sam once again grabbed Renesmee by her broken arm and this time – due to his shock – Jacob wasn't fast enough to fight him off. She let go of an agonizing growl as he dragged her towards Leah, who was still lying on the woody floor, still struggling against the venom that sought to burnt itself through her veins, seeking to singe her life, taking her life. Her brothers, some of them still in their wolf forms (those were now taking care of the shattered corpse that had been once Cillian), others had already phased back, and they gathered around Leah, anxious, afraid to lose their sister.
"Save her." repeated Sam once again as he finally let go of Renesmee when he had reached the spot where Leah was lying; the hybrid was panting, the pain in her left arm making her feel dizzy and she couldn't suppress the agonizing moans that escaped her lips. However, Sam didn't seem to have noticed her wounds or pain yet; his eyes, blurred with tears and panic, were staring at Leah and in this moment Renesmee understood. It was not very difficult to see what was so painfully obvious – Sam might have imprinted on Emily, making her his soul mate, making him fall desperately in love with her, but the awakening of a new love never necessarily meant the death of an old love.
In this moment, all Sam cared for was Leah.
Jacob, who by now had finally managed to pull himself together, appeared at her side again, supporting her weight, carefully avoiding to directly touch her broken arm; but he did not dare to throw another furious glare at Sam – no, because he understood too damn well how it must feel for him to watch the one you love suffer, even if the love Sam felt for Leah was of a completely different nature. Renesmee took a deep breath, steeling herself for the words she had to say and for the terrible reaction that was bound to follow upon her words; she looked up, finally meeting Sam's desperate gaze. She could literally see how the realisation dawned upon him, he could read in her eyes what she was going to say.
"I can't...I might kill her. I can not control myself.", she was shocked to hear how weak her voice actually sounded in her own ears, but she shrugged it off, her eyes looking for Sam's, trying, hoping him understand that whatever she could do might only make it worse. For a moment Sam looked as though he was having a heart attack, his face distorted in a single, painful mask and he allowed his head to fall in his hands; sobs and tears shook his body and he sank down on his knees: the image of a broken man.
Several moments passed them in silence, until another scream of Leah (it was astonishing that she was still alive at this point) tore them out of their momentary helplessness; and with that life came back into Sam. His hands lunged forward, reaching over Leah's body, grabbing Renesmee's shoulders and pushing her down, her face nearly colliding with Leah's shaking figure.
"SAVE HER!"
His desperate scream, his pleading command echoed in her head; her face levitated over Leah's neck and she could hear the pulse racing beneath her skin. Renesmee had her eyes shut tight, her hands were clenched to fists at her side, and she tried helplessly to push herself up again, but Sam's hands on her shoulder pressed her mercilessly down. She tried not to breathe, but the delicious scent of blood was all over Leah and at some point she had to gasp for air, and when she did that divine scent filled her nostrils. She fought against Sam's grip as the monster in her awakened at the promise of that hunger being sated, the desire in her and her desperate fight against it drove her insane but the Alpha did not let go of her.
She wanted to say no, she knew she should say no, it was a foolish, dangerous thing to even consider it for a moment – but then she remembered the desperation and helpless hope in Sam's eyes and she knew that she could not live, knowing that she could have been able to save her. She knew if there was even the slightest chance to save her life, then she had to try – she knew her father had once did it for her mother, she just had to find the strength, the will to be as strong as he was. She had to be brave, brave as her father had been.
"You need to hold her down...", her words has been so quiet, so shy, barely more than a whisper but they all heard it; immediately Sam let go of her shoulders but she didn't find the courage to meet his eyes as he laughed, insane with joy and newly revived hope. She could not see that hope in his eyes, she couldn't bear to see this gratitude, knowing that she could possibly be responsible for Leah's coming death. She leant back a bit, her eyes wandering away from Leah's deliciously presented neck down to her wrist, the half-circled moon wound shining red and tempting in her blood.
"Jake..." she whispered lowly, her voice filled with fear and pain, but there was also determination. Jacob who had heard her full well, did not need to ask what she meant, he understood; slowly, carefully his arms came around her waist, a steady grip, ready to hold her back, ready to stop her if she was losing control, if she was losing herself. Then she softly picked up Leah's wrist, the bite mark under her fingers so much cooler than the rest of the She-Wolf's skin; Leah was eyeing her suspiciously, and Renesmee could easily read the panic in her eyes.
"I am sorry." she muttered as she was silently begging her for forgiveness, and with those words she descended upon her. The moment her teeth sank into the soft skin, exactly at the same spot where Cillian had bitten her earlier, Renesmee was blinded by the most beautiful, the most sensual, the most satisfying taste she had ever encountered. Nothing in her whole had ever tasted so delicious, so fresh and hot alike, sweet and yet tart, the taste was slowly dripping over her tongue and she couldn't suppress the little moan of satisfaction that escaped her throat.
Then, she felt the venom; she could easily tell, for its taste differed so much from the sweet, tempting blood; sudden bitterness numbed her tongue and her mind instinctively twitched back from it, but she did not back away. She even intensified the grip her teeth had on Leah's skin, sinking her fangs even deeper into the girl's flesh, sucking the disgusting poison out of her veins, forcing herself to swallow it down – sudden pain flashed through her lower body, stomachache gripped her so hard she hissed sharply.
But she did not stop. She knew she had to keep going, she knew she could not stop until she had sucked the rest of the venom out of her veins, everything, up to the last drop. It was only now that she became aware of Leah's struggle – the sensual taste of blood had blinded her eyes for it until now – and she felt the fight in the girl's body, she was pushing herself so desperately, so violently against her brother's hands that they had problems in keeping her down, in keeping her still. She couldn't blame her, that procedure must feel like a painful torture to her.
After a while, the bitterness of the venom vanished and she was sure they all smelled that she had managed to suck all of the deadly liquid out of Leah's body – out of her eyes she could see Sam's face breaking into a laughter of utmost joy and relief – but she did not stop. Renesmee closed her eyes, the monster in her did not want to see the joy on his face, the monster in her did not want to stop. She could hear Jacob talking to her, his breath, hot and urgent in her ear, but she did not listen to him, she did not want to listen. The only thing she heard now was the call of blood; both her heaven and hell were made of blood now.
"Nessie, stop!"
It had been such a long time since she had tasted a human's blood and the sensation was driving her mad with hunger. She gripped now Leah's wrist with both her hands to keep herself drinking, while Jacob was tearing at her, trying to pull her away from her, but he was no match to the Vampire in her. No, she couldn't stop, she didn't want to stop. As this wonderful taste filled her mind like drug she forgot that she cared for those people, she forgot that she had wanted to save her life – she didn't care, her mind had gone blank with her lust for blood.
She could not stop. She didn't care. She did not want to stop. She didn't care. She was killing her. She didn't care.
And then suddenly she was torn away from her victim, her teeth torn out of the flesh; for a moment she felt like she was flying and then she hit the ground so hard it pushed the air out of her lungs, precious blood squirting from her mouth. She needed a moment before she could open her eyes, her vision still blurred by the monster called hunger inside her; she could still taste the sweet blood on her lips.
It was only now that it dawned upon her what he had done: she had almost killed her. This one, harsh truth was slowly sinking in; ice-cold it was burning away the shamefully sensuous taste of satisfaction and replaced it with the bitter feeling of shame, and of self-hatred. What had she done?
Tears filled her eyes and sobs shook her body, she felt felt helpless against the guilt inside her, and she had no power left to fight against the urge to punish herself for what she had done – and then she saw Jacob. He was leaning over her – it had been him who had pulled her back, so he had kept his promise – and he looked at her with so much love. The monster in her didn't deserve his love.
"Renesmee..." he said softly, and his voice was the last thing she heard before everything went black.
