Split Up

"If you were a de-Hulk-ified Hulk, where would you be?" Tony asked, peering into another of countless laboratories.

"Hiding from you," Naomi muttered. "Simple. Same thing I always do, whether I'm a de-Hulk-ified Hulk or if I'm me."

"Yeah, right. Be serious," Tony rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, because you always are," Natasha retorted, double checking the lab before signaling to move onto the next room.

"There has got to be a faster way to do this than just checking every single room in the building," Fury muttered. "Especially with my team fighting like cats and dogs…" he paused. "No offense, Carson."

Naomi rolled her eyes. "None taken. You guys don't have to apologize every time someone makes a cat reference. I agree. There's got to be a faster way."

"Split up?" Rogers suggested.

Everyone considered for a moment.

"It makes sense," Agent Romanoff said after a moment. "Cover more ground quicker."

"Hang on," Naomi interrupted. "I thought the whole point of this was to group together, not split up."

"We'll regroup after we find Banner," Fury dismissed. "Stark, do you happen to have any walkie-talkies or headsets available so we can all keep in contact?"

"Back in half a second," Stark said, diving under a table and digging through a box before producing a tangle of wires and headsets. He focused on untangling the wires for a few moments before showing about ten separate earpieces. "Tah-dah!"

"Everyone grab an earpiece," Nick ordered, picking one up for himself.

Everyone followed suit, pressing them into place.

"I still don't know, director," Naomi muttered. "Something about disassembling the Avengers just doesn't sit well with me. Splitting up doesn't sound like a good idea."

Nick considered her words for a moment, then nodded. "Alright, we'll go in groups of two or three so we're not alone. We'll convene back in the living room once we find Banner. Uncover the cameras in each room you clear as you go. Anyone has problems, call for help from your teammate or use the earpiece. Keep each other safe, and keep me posted. Agreed?" He gave Clint, Tony, and Naomi the evil eye.

The Avengers present nodded.

"Good. Everyone team up," Fury nodded to the group.

"I call not being teamed up with Stark!" Naomi exclaimed, scooting as far from the genius as she could.

"Agreed," Clint and Steve said in unison, backing away from him.

"You and me?" Hawk Eye asked the Black Widow, who shrugged. The two assassins then stood together and watched with amusement to see who else would end up getting paired… and who would be unfortunate enough to end up with Stark.

Steve sidestepped a little closer to Naomi, who rolled her eyes and simply shrugged. "Could be worse," she muttered, standing next to the Captain. They looked at the remaining three… Thor, Fury, and Stark.

Nick and Thor nodded to each other.

Tony stared around at them. "And what about me? Am I to be left alone to fend for myself in this cold, cruel-?"

"Shut up, Stark, you can come with us," Fury said, interrupting Tony's melodramatic speech with an eye roll and a solid yank on the billionaire's paint-stained shirt, dragging him out of the room.

"I'll see you soon, my friends," Thor said, giving the others a quick smile as he followed the sounds of Tony protesting for Nick to let him go.

The other two teams looked at each other.

"Suppose we should get a move on, Nat," Barton said, nudging the Black Widow with his elbow. "We'll see you two eventually," he nodded to Steve and Naomi. "Be careful. That guy's tricky."

"Good luck," Romanoff added. "We'll see you in the living room soon. Call if you need help." She gestured to her ear, where her earpiece was fit snugly.

"Don't get pranked," Naomi called after the pair as they left.

Now it was only the Huntress and Captain America.

"I've got a bad feeling about this," Steve muttered.

"Sure you do, Han Solo," Naomi rolled her eyes.

"Huh?" he frowned.

"Nothing," Naomi sighed. "Movie reference. Star Wars. A guy just says at one point that he's got a bad feeling."

"Oh," Rogers looked at her awkwardly for a moment. "Well… shall we?" He held out his elbow for her to take.

"I swear, you irk me sometimes, Steve," Naomi muttered, walking past him and giving his arm a light slap. "Let's just find Bruce and get this day over with."

Rogers just shrugged and followed her lead out of the room.

Note from LoquaciousQuibbler: Okay, another short chapter… but the next one is really long. This just sets it up for the next couple pranks. So… yeah. No one wants to team up with Stark. I mean, who would? He'd take the credit if something went right, blame you if something went wrong, and irritate you the entire time you were together… So nobody wants to be with him XD

And I know from The Winter Soldier that Steve is catching up on modern cultural staples like Star Wars, but this has actually been written for a while… since before The Winter Soldier came out… so Naomi explaining the "I've got a bad feeling about this" is just gonna remain.

And I sense Phantasmagorical Me freaking out over Naomi and Steve teaming up… I feel a disturbance in the force… ;P You'll see what happens with that next chapter.

Please favorite, follow, and review. Next Wednesday, we shall be enjoying a multitude of pranking