A/N: Once again we don't own these characters, the amazing Stephenie Meyers owns them. :(

BPOV

After Edward left me at the door to my first class I opted to not go in, but to take a breather and to sort out everything that had happened in the past few hours. Just thinking of this morning I could feel my face pull into a smile. I couldn't believe Edward had this type of effect on me. He was amazing. While outward he was an absolute god, inside he was even more amazing. Kind, gentle, loving, funny, and shy. There was just something about him. It just didn't matter that we met under less than perfect circumstances. Anyone who would have listened to half of my issues would have gone running in the other direction before I even had time to finish the story of my sad life. With Edward, however, it felt like he was running full speed ahead towards me and all my baggage.

I had walked out of the building and found myself in the courtyard that was surrounded by the tall stone building that housed my class. It was beautiful out today, green as could be and the sun shining. Flowers casting a rainbow of colors in every direction. I spotted a huge oak tree that was providing some amazing shade and no one was around, so I walked over and took a seat, leaning against the enormous trunk. I closed my eyes, reliving the amazing kiss I shared with Edward this morning. No one had ever kissed me like that, with so much love and passion. I felt every emotion that he was feeling at that very moment and it was intoxicating. I knew then what he meant by never wanting to stop, because of all the things on my mind up until that moment, not stopping that feeling was the one that screamed the loudest.

His long fingers running up and down my back, the feeling of his soft, messy hair in my hands. His amazing rock hard chest pressed against mine, his hands on my face. Man, who am I kidding, everything that had happened that morning, every word spoken, every touch felt was amazing. Something I knew I wouldn't be forgetting anytime soon. I just felt safe with him. I also felt beautiful and amazing and even happy.

I knew Edward worried that it was too fast, and it probably was. As much as I loved kissing him and being with him, I knew that I still had a lot of healing left to do. I knew that I would never forgive or forget what Jake had done to me, but he was my whole life for so long and I did still love him. I knew that it wasn't the same love that we once had, but after a lifetime with someone you can't help but still have feelings for them, no matter what they have done. But Jake was my past, and I had a feeling that Edward was my future. There was an undeniable connection between us. But as much as I wanted to get on with my life and be with Edward, I knew that I still had issues to deal with. While Edward has been patient and says he will wait for me, I still don't know if I can trust him. I mean, what if he gets tired of 

waiting, or if I am not all that he thinks I am. I don't know if I can open myself up completely to him just yet, and I don't want to give him anything less than all of me. He deserves all of me.

I don't know how long I had been sitting in the warmth of the spring sun with my eyes closed reliving every single moment that had happened this morning, but I was suddenly pulled out of my memories by a voice. A voice that carried not only amazing memories, but excruciatingly painful ones as well. My eyes sprang open only to see a very large Jacob standing in front of me.

"Bella, where have you been? I have been trying to get a hold of you. Billy has even tried. We were both starting to really worry. Since neither of us have heard anything from you in weeks."

I could feel my body tense and I started to panic. I know he couldn't do anything to me in public, but I had come to fear everything about Jake.

"You know why I am not speaking to you Jake. I have also told you more than once, that where I am and what I do is no longer any of your concern."

"Bella, are you ever going to let me apologize? I know I can never make anything I have done up, but you can't do this, you can't just act as if I never existed." He said with a tone as if he were pleading for me to understand his side.

"That is exactly what I plan on doing Jake. Because to me the Jake I knew and loved since my childhood is dead. There is no trace of him left. This new Jake is someone not only do I not know, but I don't care to know. Twenty two years of life together and in two days Jake, you destroyed every happy memory we might have had. I am sorry. I don't want anything to do with you. Just leave me alone."

"What about Billy? What am I supposed to tell him Bells, when he ask for you or what happened to you? You know that you are basically his daughter. He will be crushed."



This was true, Billy was the closest thing to a father I had left. I couldn't be around Jake though. How was I going to explain that to Billy. I couldn't tell Billy what his son had done. Not for Jake's sake but for his. Billy wasn't in the best of health and I wouldn't want to hurt him.

"Well, Jake I don't know what you want me to do about it. I can't very well tell him the real reason I want nothing to do with you. Why I can't be in the same room with you with out shaking , feeling fear or feeling physically ill. Now can I? You brought all this upon yourself. Be a man, tell Billy what you did. Tell him that you raped the girl he thinks of as a daughter." If he was going to try to hurt me with guilt I would hurt him with being blunt.

"Bella, I…I... "was all he managed to get out before he froze and I saw anger spark in his eyes. I took a step back not understanding the sudden shift in his mood. From practically begging for mercy to pure anger. He was standing a foot or two away from me staring at something over my shoulder. I took a moment to glance in that direction to see Edward walking towards us, with a livid expression on his face.

"Listen, Jake do whatever you want. Let me know what you tell Billy so that I can keep in touch with him and let nothing slip. I don't want him worrying about me." I said as I bent over to grab my bag and my book.

"Bye Jake." I said as I turned towards Edward to leave. Yet again Jake's anger got the better of him and I felt his large hand grab my upper arm and yank me back around to face him. I had no words, I froze.

"Bella, we are going to talk, I am done with you ignoring me like I am nothing."

The look alone in Jake's eyes sent waves of terror down my spine, but I only had a second for it to register because at that moment I felt a strong arm wrap around my waist and pull me from Jacob's grip. I was now replaced by Edward standing where I had been with his hand around Jake's neck, he had slammed him into the tree I had been leaning against before he found me.

"Edward don't, lets just go!" I didn't want Edward hurt or in trouble over me.



"Bella, stay back!" He said and turned his attention back to Jake.

"I have told you on more than one occasion that you were to never talk to her or touch her again. When will you get it through your head?!"

"Get, your hands off me now!" Jacob said in a deep and hateful voice. He proceeded to grab Edwards hand from his throat and shove him with force back. "I will talk to her when I want. You have absolutely no say in what me and her talk about ever!"

"You will do as I say or the next time, I will call the police. Do I make myself clear?" Edward said as he bent down to pick up his bag. Turning to me and cupping my face with his hands he spoke, " Are you alright?"

"I'm fine let's just get out." But I was interrupted before I could finish by Jake's angry booming voice

"Get your hands off of her. Who the Hell do you think you are?" He was in Edwards face now. Pushing him back. Edward looked as though he was trying not to hit him. Everything started to spiral from there. Jake pushed him hard again in the chest and Edward fell back. Edward had had it and came at Jake punching him square in the mouth. I screamed and tried to grab Edward not wanting him to get hurt but was knocked to the ground by Jake as he went to return a punch. Someone came up to help me and pulled me back. As I saw Mike, all of a sudden reach over and grab Edward, as another guy grabbed Jake.

I ran over to Edward looking over his face and then wrapping my arms around him saying "sorry" over and over again. I can't believe the trouble I had caused him. Now I had gotten him hurt.

"Let go of me!" I heard Jake yell "I'm going, Bella this isn't over. We will talk!"

"Jake, go the Fuck away!!" I screamed tears pouring down my face, look at the mess I caused.

Jake turned and left. Edward thanked Mike for helping out and Mike asked if I was alright. I just nodded.



"Bella, it is ok. I promise. I am fine." Edward tried to reassure me. I knew however that all this was my fault. Edward being such a good guy had gotten hurt because of me. I knew I shouldn't have tried to be happy earlier. I knew it was to good to be true. I knew I couldn't do this to Edward. I couldn't bring this into his life.

I felt Edwards hands on my face wiping away the tears, "Bella, look at me." but I couldn't bring myself to do it.

I felt his finger lift my chin and he waited for me to look him in the eyes. Finally I met his gaze and my heart sank. His beautiful face was starting to bruise under his right eye. It was my fault he was injured.

"Oh god, Edward I am so sorry." As I gently touched the spot under his eyes that was sure to be black in the morning.

He grabbed my hand and pulled me closer ,"Bella, it is fine. It was so worth it, getting to hit that asshole. I promise you I am fine. Are you alright? Did he hurt you?" I just shook my head. Here he is hurt and he is worried about me. This was bad I couldn't do this to him.

"I'm fine, I am just worried about you. Let's go home so we can clean up your face okay? He nodded his head and put his arm around my waist.

We walked to the car and got in. As Edward was driving home, I couldn't help but make a list in my head of all the reasons I needed to leave. What I was doing wasn't fair to Edward. I felt like I was taking advantage of his kindness and getting him hurt in the process.

There was of course the reason from this morning to stay. Because with him I was happy, I was healing.

There was something about Edward that I didn't want to be without. But I knew that he would be better off if I weren't there. That every reason I had for staying there seemed selfish, because I had no where else to go, because I needed comfort, because I was feeling something for him. All selfish. Edward was going through something much like me, and I had decided in the car ride home that I wasn't going to be 

selfish anymore. Edward needed his life back, and I was going to give it back to him. How to leave though, was going to be the real problem. I would have to find a way and soon. I had hurt him enough and this was for the best.

A/N: Sorry this chapter was short, but I promise that the next chapter will be pretty long. I hope you enjoyed it though. Please R&R! :)