Chapter 8

They didn't find much on their scavenging trip but Daryl didn't deem it a failure, he felt like Alice had benefited from the trip even if it wasn't obvious. The return trip was strange though, the closer they got to Hilltop the more reserved and worried Alice seemed to get, it was almost like she didn't want to go back.

'You alright?' he asked and she seemed to snap out of whatever reverie she had been in.

'Yeah, I'm good.' She replied in a vague tone, she seemed dreamy, not really engaged.

'You seem a little quiet, a little out of it.' Daryl remarked and Alice shrugged.

'I guess I'm just tired, I'm looking forward to a good sleep.' She told him and he nodded his head slowly. He could tell there was something more bothering her but he didn't want to intrude, they hadn't exactly been on intimate footing for long. They drove in silence for a long time before Alice broke it.

'Do you believe in curses?' She asked and Daryl was slightly taken aback.

'Not really, why?'

'I think I'm cursed.' She replied in a matter of fact tone. 'Not by a witch or something like that, just cursed in general. Do you think that's a thing?'

'Nah, it's bullshit. Why do you think you're cursed?' Daryl asked, growing concerned lest their recent trip had driven her a little crazy.

'Isn't everyone in this world?' She asked and Daryl realised that it hadn't really been that kind of conversation and judged her less. Everyone was entitled to their own existential crisis at some point. A short while after this conversation she dropped off to sleep and Daryl slowed his driving a little so she would get more sleep before they arrived back to Hilltop. He still couldn't shake the feeling like she was reluctant to return, but there would be more trips and he would try and get the real answer out of her then.

When they got back she locked herself in her room and wouldn't come out to eat. Maggie returned downstairs after trying to convince her with a concerned air.

'Did something happen on the trip?' She asked Daryl who shrugged as he shovelled his food into his mouth.

'Nothing out of the ordinary. Got attacked by some walkers, took 'em out, hid from some Saviours but they never even saw us. She seemed fine until we were on the way back.' He said and Maggie sat down slowly, perplexed.

'She won't eat.' She said softly and Daryl licked his fingers before taking the plate of Alice's food from her.

'Let me try.' He said and didn't wait for her reply before taking the plate of food up to Alice's room and knocking on the door.

'Hey,' he called. 'It's me. You gotta eat, man.'

'I'm not hungry.' She called from the other side of the door and he scoffed.

'Bullshit. I heard your stomach complainin' the whole ride home. Eat.' He instructed and banged on the door again.

'Go away.' She called and he leant against the side of the door frame.

'I ain't gonna unless you eat.' There was a pause and then the door cracked open. He was taken aback by her appearance, her eyes were red and puffy and she'd obviously been crying but tried to hide it, she stared at the floor and wouldn't look at him. She didn't say anything but held out her hand, he gave her the plate and when she went to shut the door he placed his foot in front of it so she couldn't.

'Is everything okay?' He asked softly, quietly enough so only she could hear.

'Fine. I'm just tired.' She replied but he didn't move.

'Why're you crying?' He asked and she stifled a sob. He pushed his way inside and shut the door behind him, taking the plate from her and setting it down on the side. He then placed an arm around her bare shoulders and realised she was freezing so guided her to the bed and wrapped her in a blanket.

'What's going on?' He asked of her as tears spilled down her cheeks but she looked up at him with a watery smile.

'Nothing.' She told him honestly. She hadn't seen Gene since she came back, it wasn't the thought of him that was affecting her so badly. 'Some days are just easier than others.' It was a rare moment of honesty for her.

He shook his head sadly.

'I didn't have you down for a pussy.' He said and she smiled and kicked out at him with a bare foot.

'Will you take me out training tomorrow?' She asked quietly, looking down at the floor instead of at him. He nodded.

'Yeah, 'course.' He replied and bit his lip as he looked at her. He didn't want to leave alone, he'd seen the scars on her arm, but it didn't feel right that he should stay. 'Listen, why don't I send Maggie up. She gets all this emotional crap more than I do, I can't be much help to you.'

'No, I'm fine really. You can go. I'll see you tomorrow.' She said and nodded to the door. He looked between her and the plate of food. 'I'll eat, I promise.' She smiled at him and he looked at her for a moment before sighing and nodding. There was nothing more he could do, so he left her alone.

The next morning, he searched her arms but there were no new scars and he was grateful. She seemed to be in a better mood, and applied herself better to her gun training. Over the course of the next couple of weeks their training became more frequent and ended up being a daily exercise. They both felt more comfortable in the company of the other and could feel that they were growing to become friends. Daryl decided that he liked her, she almost reminded him of a mix of Carol and Beth, he could see what Maggie had meant when she'd confided in him that Alice reminded her of Beth.

Alice herself was a little wary of allowing Daryl to become her friend. She didn't expect it turn out the way things had turned out with Gene, there was nothing of the same gleam in Daryl's eyes. He was just honest and kind and Alice relished his company, enjoying the excuse to get to know him better and avoid the farming patch at the same time. She got better at using guns and knew she owed it all to him and his teaching, but she was still wary of trusting him, of confiding in him. She wanted to tell him about Gene and what he was doing to her, she thought that if she told him now then things could stop, he could help her. All the while she couldn't shake the feeling that she really was cursed, everyone she'd ever known and cared about had died in horrible ways, she didn't want that to happen to anyone at Hilltop, especially Daryl.

They grew closer over time and spent more and more time together. Sometimes Daryl sat with her whilst she watched over Judith and Gracie; Judith was very attached to him and delighted in having two people she had grown to love nearby.

They gradually learned more about one another, about their pasts and their personalities. They learned about each other's skills and Daryl let her pretend that there was anything she could teach him when they both knew there wasn't really, their lessons comprised of him teaching her and then teasing her until she did a decent job.

During this time Gene kept coming to Alice, he caught her when she was walking back to the house and took her back to the abandoned trailer night after night and every time Alice was more and more upset by it. She didn't know how to deal with it though, she tried to fight back a couple of times and he threatened to tell Daryl that she was selling herself, not just to him but to every man. Alice didn't know why the idea of this hurt her so much, she was sure that Daryl wouldn't care. He would judge her to be sure but it wouldn't affect him any way other than he'd probably stop talking to her, he'd be disgusted by her and then so would the others. So she couldn't tell a soul.

It had been two days since Gene had caught her last, she'd deliberately gone a different way to avoid him and she thought it had worked but he worked out her trick. He appeared suddenly from behind a trailer and grabbed her wrist before she could run.

'Hey Ali, long time no see.' He said smoothly, but she could hear the anger behind his voice.

'Gene, hi.' She replied quietly.

'Where have you been?' He asked and she shrugged.

'Busy with the kids I guess, and the gun training.'

'What you still haven't learned how to pull a trigger?' He asked with spite in his voice and Alice winced. He took a deep breath and tried to compose himself.

'Let's go for a walk.' He said and placed his arm firmly around her waist, she knew where they were going and allowed herself to be led, it was easier than fighting it, she knew that. He kept a firm grip on her waist and pulled her along when she slowed or straggled, she wanted to fight, she wanted to scream, she couldn't stop the tears that filled her eyes nor the couple that spilled down her cheeks.

'Oh come on now.' Gene said when he saw her crying. He stopped but kept his hold on her, he wiped the tears from her face and then forcefully pressed his lips to hers. It was too much, she pulled away and pushed him away at the same time, he was so shocked she managed to shake him loose and she ran.

She didn't know or care where she was going, she just ran through the maze of trailers and buildings; until she turned a corner and ran straight into him, he'd been smarter than her.

'You're gonna have play real nice to make up for that now.' He smirked as he held her tighter, so much it hurt, and he pressed his lips to hers again, harder even than before.

'Jesus, get a room.' A voice said from the darkness and Gene jumped away from Alice lest the speaker should work out that she wasn't reciprocating, but the figure moved away. Alice followed him though, she'd recognised the voice.

'Daryl!' She called after him and Gene let her go, he knew it was too risky to follow her now and he just waited for his opportunity. 'Daryl!' she cried again when he didn't respond and this time he stopped and looked back at her.

'Daryl it's not what it looks like…' she began, suddenly overwhelmed with a desire to tell him everything, convinced that he would help her and protect her.

'I don't care who you sleep with.' Daryl said with a shrug and Alice froze.

'No, no it's not like that.' She whispered.

'Yeah it is, you think you're all mature and shit, hell I thought so too. I guess you're just another stupid kid. Just try and keep your legs shut until you get somewhere more private.' He said and then he gave her that look that she'd dreaded. He looked her up and down with disgust and she was sure that he had worked it out, that he blamed her, it was her fault after all. She was just the new whore in the community looking for someone to get into her pants. All of these thoughts raced through her head but as Daryl turned and walked away her heart broke and she knew that she couldn't trust anyone, not even him.

Gene came up behind her, sensing his triumph, and as he bent down to kiss her neck, Alice gave up.