Do you know that feeling when you write something and your fingers are kind of like 'yay, let's do this' while your brain's just like 'are you sure?'? This totally happened here.

Guest: Your glitter is magnificent, thank you. *standing in the sun and proudly glittering like Edward* :D

manibarilo: This one is for you and I seriously hope, it's okay. :)

Disc- oh, come on, you know the deal.

Warnings: heartbreak, mentions of suicide

One

It was around 9pm and Magnus was on his way home from work when he walked into a sudden whirlwind of photographs. The pictures were torn apart, each carrying parts of laughing faces, parts of memories torn from a screaming mind. When he looked up it was just in time to see two pale hands throw out the next load of shredded pictures from a window on the third floor of the building he'd just been passing. Once again Magnus was engulfed by the remains of lighter days, happier moments, just memories. The ground around his feet looked like a piece of modern art and he was sure that if someone would take a picture of him standing there from above, that one could be sold for a lot of money.

The sound of something fragile hitting a wall shattering to pieces, dropping to the ground, yanked Magnus out of his thoughts. Silence. Then again. And again. And again. The silence between the crashing sound became the rhythm of Magnus' breathing. Something bigger was thrown over and worry bloomed in Magnus' chest.


Alec couldn't scream despite all that screeching anger inside of his head. All that passed his lips were sobs, his eyes drowning in hot tears. He threw things against the wall of his atelier until there was nothing left to throw and he was too exhausted to keep doing it anyway. He just sank to his knees and kept breathlessly sobbing, filling the silence with his pain.

He had thought everything was okay, going fine. He had been so wrong. He had been cheated on. A couple of months and he hadn't even realized it until the words were thrown at his face.

"I met someone."

Three words. It was so easy to mess everything up. Just as much as you needed for 'I love you'. Cruel irony of the world.

"This isn't working anymore, Alec."

He had thought it was, but obviously had been wrong. How could someone just scratch five years up to 'it's not working'. Alec looked down at his hands pressed against the wooden floor of his atelier. His lungs were greedily sucking in the air they had been robbed of by the floods of tears, the sobbing.

"I'm such an idiot", Alec whispered to himself. He felt his tears slowly drying on his cheeks. He closed his eyes and let his forehead sink down to rest it against he back of his hands.

Maybe he would get tonight. Maybe tomorrow he would swear to never drink again and throw up. Maybe he would go for ice cream tomorrow. He didn't feel like leaving his apartment this evening.

So this was what heartbreak felt like.

One person.

One heart given away too thoughtlessly.

The buzzer sounded when Alec started contemplating to spend the night on the wooden floor.


It was sheer luck that Magnus could figure out which one was the doorbell of the apartment on the third floor which was probably suffering from a sudden loss of photographs at the moment ... and intact interior judging by the earlier sounds. There was a sign next to one of the many names. The building didn't look that big from the street, but it seemed to have a lot of inhabitants.

Alexander Lightwood

Photographer

3. Floor

The sign was handwritten and Magnus found it endearing for some reason. So small, so unimpressive, so simple. A clean script. Magnus' lips curved into a little intimate smile and then he shook his head because it was ridiculous to form any kind of attachment to simple handwriting.

Without further ado he simply pressed the buzzer. He had thought of just walking away, leaving whoever was upset up there to figure things out on their own. From rather harsh personal experience Magnus knew that one was better left alone in these moments ... most of the time. But people called their friends in these moods, right? Why wasn't there anybody hurrying down the street to get to the door Magnus was currently standing in fron of? With some alcohol, maybe ice cream, maybe just some take out. Why was there nobody else pressing the buzzer so viciously like Magnus did right now. Weren't there at least some neighbors looking for the source of the noise?

Maybe there were. Maybe somebody was already on the way. Magnus decided to just check in on whoever felt like letting out their frustration on innocent pieces of furniture. Yes, he thought, just one minute to make sure that nobody was on the verge of doing something really stupid like ... cold fear crawled across his neck as dark images surfaced again. A dark room, sunlight flooding in from the only window. He had been too late back then. Things could have been so different if he'd been just one minute earlier.

Just one.

Magnus didn't notice that he'd been pressing the buzzer with more force than necessary until his finger started aching. Like he'd been burned he took his hand back. The silence following the dull sound of the ringing was cold as ice. Then a voice. One exhausted breath.

"Yes?"

A sudden rush of relief.

"Are you okay?"


Alec looked at the speaker. His exhaustion was partly replaced by confusion.

"Excuse me?"

"Are. You. Okay?", the voice repeated slowly, like the other was suspecting Alec to be a clueless five-year-old. Irritation followed confusion.

"Who are you?"

"I saw you throwing out those torn pictures and then I heard that something was thrown at a wall and ... I wanted to make sure that you are okay." Alec peered at the shards of coffee cups his boyf- his ex had been keeping at Alec's place. There were more, but he doubted that he'd get the same satisfaction from throwing a toothbrush against the wall.

"I'm not", he said more to himself than whoever was standing down there at the door. His eyes lingered on the chaos he had created. No, he wasn't okay. He was alive. He wasn't physically hurt. But he wasn't okay. He wasn't fine. He didn't want to smile right now.

"Do ... do you think about ... hurting yourself?"

Alec's eyes snapped back to the speaker. The green light was blinking in the top right corner. The sign of somebody listening? He wasn't sure.

"No." His muscles were aching, his body was begging for a break. He was so tired. He didn't even want to get drunk anymore. He wanted to go to sleep. He wanted to wake up and find everything unharmed. Nothing more than a bad dream. No, he didn't think about hurting himself, he had been hurt enough for one day. "I'm too tired for it anyway ... just tell me what you want and then get lost. I'm not taking new orders till next week." Or month. Maybe in a few days he could already laugh about this mess, though something told him that it would be hysterical laughter turning into gross sobbing at best.

"Would you let me up for a minute, so I can make sure of that?"

Alec stared at the speaker incredulously. The fuck?


Magnus already had one hand on the handle of the entrance door ready to get inside at the shortest sound of the buzzer. Unfortunately for now there was only silence.

"Why?" Disbelieve. Open and clear. Magnus could practically see the hands thrown up in the air in the way people did to underline their incomprehension of another's behavior. He smiled. He wanted to see the expression of the face that belonged to the voice. He had already decided not to walk away this time.

"My mother hung herself after my father told her that he wanted a divorce", he explained. At least that was what he'd been told. What had really passed between his parents that evening, he didn't know, would never know. Magnus' hand slipped from the door handle to be pressed against his forehead. His eyes slipped closed. His breath vibrated in his chest, ripples of old sadness passed over his skin. "I heard the chair fall over later, but I didn't go into her room to look ... I thought it was nothing, something accidentally pushed from the nightstand." The wind picked up taking some of the shreds on the sidewalk away, carrying them down the street. The distance grew between them and the aching heart on the third floor. "I'm not going to make the mistake twice. Once was enough. So, please, just let me up for a minute, just one. Let me see that you're ... well, not okay, but at least, that you're going to be okay again. I know, I'm a stranger and this is probably the creepiest thing you've experienced today and maybe it's just selfish, but-"

He was interrupted by the sound of the buzzer. Magnus had never taken three flights of stairs this fast.


Sometimes it only takes one heart to heal another.

Just one.

Okay, I usually don't beg for reviews or anything, but this time: seriously, what do you think? I wasn't even sure about posting it and I hope I didn't make a mistake by doing so. o.o

*runs away and hides under a rock*