D'awwww D: this chapter is under 2,000!! It's only 1,829 T^T i'm sorry.

There was actually a lot in this chapter I was holding back. I kind of wanted to draw it out so the story would be longer.

This chapter might regain Hikaru's fans :) And Dani strikes yet again! Awh I love her.

Well due to the fact that I got 2 reviews this is why I'm posting it now. :)

This one is dedicated to: Blaze Moonlight (again) and Ch3rryc0l4 (again!)

haha I don't own Ouran just Dani. :D


~~~Tamaki's POV~~~

"What's happening to him!?" I shouted to one of the doctors who was putting him on a different bed and trying to roll him away.

"His heart is going through to much strain. He's hyperventilating. We could lose him. Quick to the emergency room!" They ran off and I stood there shaking. I dashed out of the room and looked everywhere.

There wasn't a hallway I didn't check. Then I found what I was looking for.

"Ok, I want to know and I want to know now what you did to Kaoru." I said dangerously low after slamming Hikaru to a wall.

"Get off of me Tono." He said and shoved me off.

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO HIM!?" I shouted and a bunch of people looked at us oddly.

"Why don't you ask HIM?" He sneered and I just noticed I was crying.

"Oh I'm sorry." I was being awfully sarcastic and snide. "I should go in the emergency room, wake him up and ask."

"...Why the hell is he in the emergency room?" He asked and crossed his arms.

"Strain on the heart and hyperventilation." I said and Hikaru shrugged.

"He'll be f-." He dropped to the floor and clutched his heart wheezing. I completely forgot I was mad at him and ran over.

"Hikaru!" I called and he looked up at me and closed his eyes.

He shoved me off and dashed off somewhere. I didn't know where.


~~~ In the emergency room~~~

"We're losing him!" One doctor shouted and they tried to restart his heart with the electricity but it stayed at that one line.

Kaoru.. Died.

"KAORU!!!" Hikaru yelled running into the room with tears streaming down his face. "KAORU I'M SORRY!!!"

"Get out of here! You can't be--" Hikaru ran over to his brother's side.

"Wake up Kaoru. Please! It's not fair Kaoru!!! WAKE UP!!" He hugged Kaoru's limp body and kissed his forehead. "Your not leaving me Kaoru. You're my other half." Hikaru grabbed Kaoru's hand and laced their fingers together. "Without you I'm not whole. Kaoru don't you understand that?"

"Sir your going to have to get out." One of the nurses said and they dragged him out of the room.

"KAORU I LOVE YOU DON'T DIE!!" He screamed as tears ran down his face.

He was brought to the waiting room where everyone else was. He started punching the walls and kicking chairs and screaming.

"SIR CALM DOWN!" A nurse yelled and Dani ran over and held Hikaru until he stopped fussing.

"DON'T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN! DO YOUR FUCKING JOB AND BRING MY BROTHER BACK TO LIFE!!" He screamed and Dani sat down with him and put him on her lap and rocked back and fourth.

"Shhh... Calm down." She had tears in her eyes also.

"S... So your saying... H...He's ... dead?" Tamaki's voice squeaked when he finished the word dead and he started crying and collapsed to the floor.

"Dani.. It's my fault." Hikaru cried into Dani and she continued to rock the full grown boy in her lap.

"Shh... Master Hikaru..." She didn't know what else to say.


~~~Hikaru's POV~~~

I'm laying in my bed. Completely empty. I didn't know hearts could ache this much. It.. It hurt so badly.

"Kaoru..." I sobbed and looked at his side of the bed. I crawled over to it and held his pillow close. It smelt like him.

Why was I so cruel?

Why am I just finding out about how I feel?

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

I heard Kaoru's voice say in my ear. It was soothing to hear his voice.

I couldn't sleep. I got up still holding his pillow. My legs were shaking uncontrollably. I walked to the TV and pulled out a tape and pushed it in the tape player and sat down in front of the TV.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY HIKARU!!" I heard my mom's voice say on the tape and the younger boy smiled.

"But mommy I'm Kaoru!" Kaoru giggled cutely.

As I watched our home videos I started crying even more. My heart ached.

"Kaoru.." I whispered.


I don't even know how long I watched videos for. All I knew was I had to go to school and I still wasn't done.

School wasn't the same without my other half. I was quiet. I was shaking. I didn't want to believe he was dead but every time I turned to his desk I was disappointed to find that he wasn't in it.

The teachers went easy on me today. I wouldn't cry in school but I wouldn't talk and all I did was put my hands in my lap and look down at my desk.

A lot of girls came up to me crying and hugged me. Honestly I hated it. I don't like when people came to me crying. It made it harder to be strong.

Tamaki wasn't even hiding the fact that he was sad. I saw him a few times just walking down the hallway with that empty look. He was crying constantly.

I should be too. I'm the reason he died.

My eyes widened. I wasn't over exaggerating. It really was my fault. If it wasn't for me... Kaoru would still be alive.

I covered my mouth and collapsed onto the floor. Tears rolled down my face, onto my hand and onto the cold marble floor.

I rocked myself back and forth and suddenly I couldn't hear anything. It's like something was causing me not to hear.

A few people ran up to me and hugged me and asked me something.

I couldn't hear them. I stayed silent. I was shaking and rocking myself back and forth.

All. Your. Fault.

How does it feel knowing your twin brother died by your hands?


The host club couldn't come fast enough. Of coarse we weren't really up for hosting. Especially Tamaki. I've seen his small depressed stages but this one was horrible. All he did was sit there and look out of the window.

Everyone was quiet. Honey was crying his eyes out, Mori was comforting him, he wasn't crying but he looked awfully sad. Haruhi was on the other side of the room looking out the window away from everyone. Kyoya was typing but every time he stopped it looked like he was hurting a bit more.

I was shaking and I didn't care if I'd make them all hate me. They needed to. If they didn't already...

"Guys." I said and my voice cracked and they all slowly turned to me. "...I'll tell you why he was so sad all of the time..." I fell to the ground and started to cry.

They all seemed interested. Honey calmed down on the crying. Kyoya stopped typing. Even Haruhi got up and took a seat on the couch.

"What did you do to him?" Tamaki's voice was oddly cold.

I didn't know if I could actually say it. I was in hysterics but I finally stood up with shaky legs.

"I liked Haruhi..." I started and looked at the ground but then sort of made eye contact. "And I couldn't have her..." I turned around and started pacing. "So I drank. Me and him did. I didn't know he wasn't completely drunk. I was wasted... We had sex..." I stopped pacing and looked at the floor.

I didn't know how to finish it so I pulled out my cell phone. Dani got mad at me so recorded what Kaoru said and sent it to me. My hands were shaking and I pressed play.

"Well... The other day he got really drunk, I was only slightly buzzed... But... We... We had sex. And then in the morning he didn't remember anything and he said obviously it wasn't important if he didn't remember! And then the OTHER day we had sex when he was drunk and I was completely sober. And he moaned fucking Haruhi's name!"

My mouth was covered as it played and then I closed the phone and started crying again.

"S....So that's why... He... He didn't like me." Haruhi stuttered and started to shake.

"That's not all.." I said and opened my phone again. I nearly dropped it. And I hit play.

"...Hikaru your drunk." After a few seconds struggling noises were heard. "You said you wouldn't do this."

"Kaoru, I need this."

"I'm with Tamaki." More struggling. "No, I can't do this Hikaru!"

"Pretend its with Tamaki. After all, I'm not going to be thinking of you at all." Whimpering.

I dropped my phone to the floor and curled in a ball and cried.

"I didn't know I said those things to him." I whimpered.

I'm proud of you Hikaru.

Kaoru's voice said in my ears and I started crying harder.

"KAORU I'M SO SORRY!!!" I yelled and started kicking. I want him back but I knew I wasn't going to have him.


Through most of the time at the host club none of us said a word until Tamaki took in a long shaky breath.

"Well... We should plan his funeral." He said and we heard chuckling.


Awh my poor baby is dead D: T^T it's ok. I've got enough tissues for us all.