I'm really sorry about not updating sooner , I've just been busy though I know that's not much of an excuse.
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Kathryn paced the length of her room like a panther trapped in its cage. She needed something, anything. Upon hearing two doors close, she got changed into jeans, heavy black boots, a t-shirt and a hoodie before grabbing her purse and easing her way out of her room. Out of habit, she grabbed the car keys that'd been left carelessly on the end table by the sofa before slipping out the front door and into Hotch's perfectly parked car. Putting the key in the ignition, Kathryn hesitated knowing that what she was doing was wrong and more or less stealing – whilst intoxicated no less. Still, she reasoned, she'd be fine and she'd done this countless times before yet her conscious nagged at her about Aaron being a good guy and him not deserving this. After an internal struggle that lasted far longer than she would have liked, the sixteen year old started the car and tore from the driveway, racing down the street and far surpassing the speed limit, needing the exciting adrenaline rush it never failed to give her.
A voice echoed in her mind that she couldn't outrun her problems or her nightmares but she'd effectively told that part of her brain to shut up because, although that may be true, it wouldn't stop her from trying. Hotch's face appeared in her mind, disappointment clear in her mind and she nearly turned around but was broken from her struggle by a series of beeping of car horns. Realising she what she was doing she swerved quickly, narrowly missing another car – one that contained a husband, wife and two children. She sighed deciding to take the long way home.
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The summer sun shone through her pale cream curtains and onto her face making Kathryn groan in pain at the headache that threatened to split her head in two. The girl relished in the pain and the guilt, which she thoroughly deserved, especially when she happened to glance over at the end table and saw a glass of water with two painkillers next to it. Getting herself out of bed and over to the curtains proved to be a difficult task but after she made it, she dragged open the curtains knowing she deserved the intense pain that followed as the bright sun engulfed her. Her morning routine, which usually only took twenty minutes took her forty-five and though she looked temptingly at the painkillers she shook her head and left them. She wasn't worthy of the kindness Hotch showed her especially after last night.
Luckily the house was empty but she couldn't stop the slice of hurt that came through her at the prospect of her being alone, of them leaving her alone. Then again, it's not like she could blame them after all trouble she'd caused them. The overwhelming urge to run hit her but as she turned to go upstairs she found Aaron leaning against the entryway, studying her. The idea of being alone suddenly sounded a lot more appealing.
"Did you have fun last night?" He asked casually, stepping forward and into the room with his arms folded.
"Where's Jack and Jessica?"
"Don't change the subject." Hotch told her. "Did you have fun last night?"
For the first time in two months she flinched as his question cut through her relentlessly. She knew there was no correct answer for this kind of question just like how she knew there was going to be some kind of consequence for her actions and her mind instantly trailed back to last night's nightmare. Gulping she straightened up and rolled her shoulders back knowing it was better to act confident and unaffected. "Drinking? Alone? It's not really all that much fun to drink on your own sir."
"No, I didn't mean the drinking." He watched the confusion flit across her face before understanding dawned on her. "Maybe I should elaborate for you? Did you have fun taking my car for a ride last night, whilst you were intoxicated."
Kathryn flinched again as he spat the words out, levelling her with his expert glare. "I'm sorry."
"Not good enough." The teen forced herself to stay where she was as he took a step forward with something in his hands. "Your bag." He informed her by way of explanation as he threw it to her feet.
"I don't understand." She cursed at how timid her voice sounded and for the pain in her chest. Mentally steeling herself especially considering she knew that this would happen, she met the man's gaze.
"It's packed with some of your stuff. Dave's going to come and pick you up shortly." Running his hand through his hair, he forced himself to watch the number of emotions that flickered across her face knowing that this was for the best as much as it would kill him. "We had a deal and you've broken it. Numerous times now actually, what the hell were you thinking Kathryn! You could've been killed; you could've hurt or killed somebody else. Hell, you could be in a prison cell right now!"
"I said I was sorry, what more d'you expect?" She yelled, exasperated.
"More than this." His voice held a very calm and levelled tone and she instantly felt worse but she had no idea what to do to fix it.
"Next time instead of drinking or going for a joy ride just talk to me. I told you I wouldn't judge you for your past but I can and have judged you over this, you're so stupid sometimes. What the hell are you trying to prove, Kathryn? Jokes on me though I guess 'cos I was fool enough to believe you were better than this." Without giving the girl time to answer, he shook his head and walked towards the kitchen, in need of a cup of coffee.
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So there's the next chapter , I know it's not great but I needed to put something up as I haven't in so long . Thanks to everyone who takes the time to read this .
Let me know what you think ? Please ?
