Howdy my friends and kind reviewers. I am BACK baby! Chapter 8 is up! Now that our little "pest" problem is taken care of, I shall continue on with my story. Enjoy and review please.

Royal Pains Chapter 8

"Okay so where the heck is Pintonville anyways?" Dot grumbled as Yakko and Wakko looked over a map.

"Well I'm not sure since Wakko here just took a huge bite out of the northern borders." Yakko looked through a huge gaping hole in the map and glared at Wakko.

Wakko shrugged. "I was hungry."

They had been looking at maps and checking town names for three hours and still had no clue where Pintonville was. Yakko was even beginning to doubt it even existed. He wondered if Val even would go back there if she lived in such a place. Then it hit him. She wouldn't go back.

"She's not in Pintonville for two reasons. First, it doesn't exist."

"That's a pretty good reason." Dot nodded.

Yakko ignored her. "The second would be because she would go where there is work. And right now, the top place for work is…"

Acme Falls. Such a nice town. And so far I haven't been thrown into a mop bucket once! I'm loving this place!

Val smiled as she stood cashier in Barren Von Plotz's burger place. Sure the job was a bit humiliating what with the paper hat and greasy work clothes but hey, it was work and work meant money and money meant Val wasn't wrestling the cockroaches for garbage out of the bins anymore. Val shuddered. Those were bleak times even for her.

Two rather fat hippos stomped into the restaurant to order and Val had to look straight up to smile at the blue one. "Good afternoon sir. Welcome to Plotz's burgers where you practically hand over your wallet but hey, at least now you can eat too." Val came up with that herself. No one said living from paycheck to paycheck couldn't have it's kicks.

"Oh Flavio what shall we eat today?" The purple hippo asked.

"Marita darling, anything you ask is yours." The blue hippo kissed the purple one's hand.

"Oh well in that case…"

Three hours later…

"MY ENTIRE INVENTORY IS DEMOLISHED! YOU'RE FIRED!"

"Hey hey hey hold on a minute! You specifically told me that whatever the customer wants, they get!" Val glared at the tiny bald man who's face was like a sweaty tomato.

"Not when they want to eat the entire store!"

"They're hippos what did you expect? If you're so racist about hippos, maybe you should have a sign. Must be 400 pounds or lighter to eat at this restaurant!"

"Don't use that smart talk with me! Go get your stuff and get out!"

"I want my paycheck first!" Val stuck out her hand stubbornly. Plotz glared at her, shoved his hand in his pocket, and dropped 35 cents in change into her palm. Val looked at it and blinked.

"You've got to be kidding me. This couldn't even get me the wrapper on a piece of gum!"

"Well maybe you should have thought about that before handing over my entire store! Now get out before I decide to make you pay for every sesame seed on every last bun!"

Val balled up her fist, tempted to make a target but forced herself to turn on her heels and walk out with dignity. As soon as she got outside, she looked down and saw she was still wearing the ugly uniform and smiled.

"Come one come all! Everything 99 percent off at Plotz's Burger place! Get um while they're hot!" Val shouted to all the villagers within hearing distance and they came running at full speed to the restaurant, scrambling to get their cheap food. Val smiled with satisfaction when she heard her new ex boss scream in terror. Music to my ears.

Yakko, Wakko, and Dot arrived in town and saw nothing out of the ordinary. They began their search at food stands, bakeries, tailor shops. Nothing.

"This is taking too long. Can we stop and eat? I'm hungry." Wakko pouted. Yakko sighed.

"Sure."

They headed down to Plotz's and saw that it was packed with angry villagers all wanting food.

"Looks like old Plotzy bit off more than he could chew." Dot mused.

"Couldn't of happened to a nicer ex tax collector." Yakko grinned. They entered the store and everyone turned gaping upon seeing the 3 rulers.

"It's them! Everyone out of the way!" All the villagers made a path so the Warners could get through. Yakko looked unimpressed, Wakko hungry, and Dot was happily blowing kisses at all her loyal subjects. They walked up to the register where Plotz was shaking like a tiny tea cup Chihuahua.

"Hiya Plotzy. Can we eat?"

"I-I'm so sorry your majesty but I don't have anything left! A foolish girl I just fired sold my entire stock to those 2 hippos! I have nothing left!"

Yakko froze. "Wait…did she sell those curly fries too?"

Plotz nodded.

"Darn." Yakko frowned. "Well sibs I guess we'll have to eat somewhere else. Than we'll keep looking for Val. She's gotta be here somewhere."

Dot smacked her palm against her forehead. "Oh my gosh this is ridiculous. Plotz who was the foolish girl you fired?"

"She had red hair, she was tiny, and she had a sarcastic attitude."

Yakko tapped his finger against his chin. "Huh. I wonder if that's Val."

"No duh Sherlock Holmes. Let's go!" Dot grabbed Yakko and Wakko and they ran outside. Wakko whined. "But I'm hungry!"

Val sat in the alleyway staring at the 35 cents in her hand. I guess I can make due until I find another job. There's plenty of other places to try.

Val tried not to think about how she would go hungry again. She tried but focusing on not being hungry made her belly yell for attention and she curled up on an old newspaper and tried to sleep. It's just not fair. I try and try but I never win. I always get fired for some reason or another. Sure sometimes I ask for it but these last two jobs weren't really my fault! Why can't I just find something good and keep it?

A cockroach skirted towards her and she frowned. Great. Competition for the garbage again. Looks like I'm back to square zero.

Yakko had the plan to split up and meet back in town square when they found her. Dot ran off to the jewelry shops, Wakko to the food stands (obviously), and Yakko ran to the places near their old home to see if anyone had seen her. He knocked on the acorn tree door, praying she could help.

'What?" Slappy glared when she opened the door. Yakko smiled. "Nice to see you too Slappy. Can you help me?"

"Can I? Yes. But will I? No."

"But-"

"Look kid I'm retired. I want to spend my time alone and helping people doesn't leave me much time to be alone now does it?"

"Look Slappy I'm just looking for a girl-"

"Yeah well good for you but leave me out of your love life!" Slappy slammed the door in Yakko's face, leaving him speechless and defeated. He wandered through town, too afraid to go to town hall and see that neither of his sibs had found her either. He just couldn't win. Yakko walked passed an alleyway and saw her, curled up against the dirty wall. He blinked to make sure it was really her than he sprinted for her.

"Val!"

Val jumped and grabbed an old pipe from the ground, still clearly dreaming. "Back off cockroaches it's MY garbage!"

Yakko laughed and grabbed the pipe. " You always have pointy things when I surprise you. Do you WANT to kill me?" Val blinked out of her daze.

"Yakko?"

"In the living handsome." Yakko grinned slyly. Val smiled and hugged him, happy to see at least one good thing in her life.

Yakko gagged. "You smell like a sewer."

Val glared and shoved him away. "Well excuuuuuuse me for being a jobless street rat."

"First you're a filthy maid now you're a jobless street rat. We need to work on your self esteem. Don't worry about the smell though. When we get you back to the castle, Dot'll be itching to give you a makeover."

"Back? I'm not going back." Val stepped away.

Yakko frowned. "What, would you rather live in an alleyway? Come on don't be stupid."

"I'm not stupid! I'm just not going to face Giselle ever again."

Yakko smiled, reaching for her hand. "You won't work as a maid Val. You'll be a personal guest of mine."

Val jerked her hand back from his pleasant touch. No way was she falling for his ways again.

"Thanks for the offer but I'd rather stay here."

Yakko laughed. "Good one. You almost had me fooled. Now come on."

"I said no." Val crossed her arms stubbornly.

Yakko gaped at her. "Are you SERIOUS? Val why in the world would you want to stay here when you can live like royalty?"

Val glared at him. "This is just a temporary set up. I'm not going back because I never look behind me and because I favor taking care of myself. I don't need to be whisked away like Cinderella. I have my own ways and I'm perfectly happy using them. Goodbye and enjoy being royal your HIGHNESS." Val stressed the last word, letting him know she got the joke and was using it.

Yakko stepped right up to her, his nose touching hers. "You're coming back with me whether you walk or if I have to drag you."

Val stared him down. "You wouldn't dare."

Wakko and Dot exchanged a look as they met in town hall. Neither of them had found Val and no one had seen her.

"I hope Yakko doesn't get too upset."

"We'll just invite some princesses to the castle." Dot shrugged. "He'll feel better."

Just then, Yakko joined them, with a burlap sack tossed over his shoulder. It was kicking a screaming a whole lot of profanities that definitely shouldn't be repeated.

"Hey guys ready to go?"

"Is that Val?" Wakko asked. The sack flailed and screamed. "PUT ME DOWN RIGHT NOW!"

"Um…yeah. Come on let's go before she knocks me out. I didn't think it would be this hard to woo a maid. But then again, Val isn't just any old maid."

Dot laughed as Yakko dragged the furious sack of Val to the castle.

My brother better know what he's getting into. This girl is no Disney Princess.