Chapter Eight
A/N: I do not own Harry Potter
Lily knocked on Petunia's door at Number Four, Privet Drive. She held a sleeping Harry in his carrier in one hand and a bouquet of flowers in the other. Before she could knock on the door it swung open and Dudley almost walked into her.
"Aunt Lily!" he exclaimed, "Harry!" His face broke out into a grin, which Harry returned.
"Does your mum need any help, Dudley?" Lily asked as they went into the house. which was unusually messy. A pile of Dudley's toys blocked the way into the kitchen next to an empty bin.
"Dudley! That better be Aunt Lily at the door. If you're trying to get outside again I swear you will sit in your room until dinner!" Petunia's voice echoed off the walls rather loudly.
"It's alright, Tuney, we're here," Lily answered.
"Oh, Lily, excuse the mess. Dudders just learned how to lift up his whole basket of toys. Vernon's quite proud, of course, but after the first ten times it's gotten tiresome. He hasn't managed to put all the toys back without getting distracted," Petunia added.
"Tuney, honestly, you should see how I left the living room. You'd think I had about six toddlers instead of one. And there's the potions kit mess Harry left in the kitchen. I used to think that blasted toy broom Sirius gave Harry was the worst present he'd gotten so far, but then Severus insisted on the candy potions kit. My ceiling will never be the same."
"I understand that feeling. Dudley's just finished the phase when he thought it was marvelously clever to throw large portions of his food into the air. Although, when he threw some pureed broccoli and carrots into Marge's mouth it was hilarious. That horrible woman has been spewing all sorts of prejudiced nonsense for years, and I won't stand for it anymore while Dudley is growing up."
"Vernon's alright with that?"
"She is his sister, so she visits once a year, but even Vernon's not too fond of her these days. You know, she was giving him a hard time about the new diet and exercise regime he went on after Dudley was born."
"You're kidding!"
"No! That woman actually believes that it's better to eat whatever you want then listen to a trained doctor's advice. I bet that's what she told Vernon too, all those years after her parents died."
"So that's where he got it from."
"I'm just glad that he didn't inherit her passion for breeding bulldogs." They both burst out in laughter. Harry and Dudley joined in cluelessly, looking up from their game, which involved Dudley's entire set of plastic toy soldiers and his model of a zoo.
"Aunt Marge smells!" Dudley added.
"That's right, baby boy. Aunt Marge smells because she smokes, which is a very bad habit," Petunia agreed, walking into the living room to smile at her son.
"What are you boys playing?" Lily asked.
"Hogwarts Zoo!" the two boys exclaimed at once. Lily raised her eyebrow.
"He alternates between Hogwarts Zoo and Cowboy Zoo," Petunia shrugged.
"What's the difference?"
"The wizards use magic to tame the dragons and hippogriffs in Hogwarts Zoo, and the cowboys fight off the robbers trying to steal the buffalo and horses in Cowboy Zoo mainly. It's a useful game for Dudley to learn lots of different kinds of animals."
"Wizarding species as well?"
"I'm sure it'll be useful eventually, and this way he can learn about your world too."
"You've really put a lot of effort into our reconciliation, Tuney."
"I'm not the one who brought her sister a bouquet of petunias and lilies."
"Too obvious?" Petunia rolled her eyes.
"If they weren't my favorite flowers, then probably. I'm just glad you didn't bring any more pies."
"Hey, the filling was edible! Even if the crust was a little browned..."
"The pie filler you bought from the store would have been acceptable with some ice cream, but not after you mixed cherry and pumpkin flavors."
"Now that I think about it, before I made it for you and Vernon the only time I made a pie was when I was pregnant with Harry."
"You should've asked for my advice, you never make pregnancy dishes for anyone other than a pregnant woman. Have you seen me serving you a peanut butter bacon muffin with mustard frosting? Of course not!"
"Wait, you actually made more than one of those?"
"Of course not."
"For a minute there I was concerned for Dudley's future preferences in food."
"Vernon made one for me every morning for two weeks."
"Wow. Just wow."
"You didn't think I married him for his money, did you?"
"That's devotion right there. I've never seen that side of him."
"He's very shy about it. It's even more adorable when he's playing with Dudley and Harry."
"I have heard rumors about a mustached horse occupying your house from time to time." Petunia laughed loudly.
"Rumors confirmed, but if you tell Vernon I told you he'll be horribly embarrassed." Petunia admitted.
"Embarrassed about what, Petunia dearest?" Vernon's slightly annoyed voice called from the door.
