Cedric hadn't realized how spoiled he'd been for the past three months with no Triwizard Tasks to worry about. Ever since Mr. Bagman had explained the third task to the champions on Thursday, he hadn't been able to stop thinking about it. He hadn't even been able to sleep for the past three nights since then, and when he had, his dreams consisted of running through deadly mazes, desperately searching for a way out. At this rate it was going to be an excruciatingly long three and a half weeks until the final task.
He jogged down to Hagrid's with the rest of the Hufflepuff team for their usual bi-weekly forest rendezvous. He was willing to bet that he shouldn't even be joining them, since by working with the gamekeeper he might gain an unfair perspective on the upcoming task. It appeared Hagrid had begun to realize that as well, because for the past two months he had consistently kept Cedric away from what the rest of the teams were doing, almost always pairing him with Draco on some menial groundskeeping task.
Even though the Slytherin boy was widely disliked by the rest of the school, Cedric preferred to work with him than with the other Hufflepuffs. He was surrounded with Hufflepuff students all week, so it was nice to diversify his social circle. Besides, Draco was an interesting challenge. The younger boy was hypersensitive to insult, to the point where simple conversations could devolve into arguments without warning. Working with him was never easy, but Cedric was drawn to him.
Draco had unique perspectives on everything, from Quidditch tactics ("just fly faster") to dating ("just don't do it"), and most importantly for today, he didn't ask too many questions. As if it hadn't been bad enough obsessing over the task whenever he was alone, every few minutes Cedric had had to fill someone in on the details of the upcoming task, or discuss possible plans of action he could take in it, or hazard guesses as to what terrifying creatures he was likely to encounter. Plus with the end of the tournament in sight, his teammates were becoming more persistent in their inquiries about who had been nominated for the Hogwarts Quidditch team. He needed a distraction and Draco was sure to provide it. Even getting in an argument was better than feeling this constant anxiety.
They joined the Slytherins at the meeting location, arranging themselves in their habitual self-segregated team clusters. As soon as he saw Cedric, Hagrid motioned him aside from the rest of the students and addressed him in hushed tones.
"Cedric, you've had yer chat with Mr. Bagman, haven't yeh?" Cedric nodded his assent. "Righ', well I've been thinkin' that maybe yeh shouldn't be joinin' us in the forest anymore. We wouldn't want yeh to get any ideas abou' you-know-what."
Cedric smiled wryly. He certainly did know what, and so did the rest of the school, so it seemed rather silly to act like the task was a huge secret. Then again, if rumours were true, he was lucky Hagrid hadn't already accidentally revealed some of the real secrets involved in it. The gamekeeper didn't exactly have an impeccable track record for keeping confidences.
Cedric shrugged his shoulders and nodded good-naturedly to indicate his acquiescence, then turned to hike back up the way he'd come. So much for being distracted from his worries. Now he'd have an entire afternoon away from his friends with nothing to do but worry. Maybe he could try practicing some spells to use in the tournament. With nobody to practice them on, though, it was likely to be a fruitless exercise.
He'd made it about halfway up the hill, lost in thought, when he heard a voice call from below, "Hey! Wait up!"
He turned to see Draco hurrying up the path behind him. Draco slowed his pace as he drew closer, slightly winded. Cedric was confused. Had the gamekeeper changed his mind?
"What's going on? Did Hagrid send you after me?" Cedric asked.
"You could say that," Draco responded, catching his breath.
"Bummer. It's a lot of work to climb all the way up here just to fetch me back."
"What? Oh, no, bollocks to that," Draco scoffed. "We're not going back to the forest. I'm coming to help you practice, you know, for the thrilling final task." The Slytherin boy grinned. Cedric was skeptical. It wasn't like Hagrid to let students shirk their duties, especially Slytherins. Maybe Draco was just skipping.
"Really? Are you sure he meant for you to get out of whatever they're doing in the forest?"
"Yeah. He made it pretty clear." Draco smirked. "It was my idea, of course, but he's so dense that it didn't take much convincing to get him to think it was his. I just reminded him what a 'bad apple' I am, and hinted rather strongly that I might be liable to sabotage his precious task set-up."
Cedric smiled reluctantly. "So he's worried you'll damage some plants, but is totally fine having you cast dangerous spells at a fellow student?"
"Apparently. Although I'm pretty sure he assumed you'd be doing all the spell-casting. He probably just wanted to provide an opportunity for somebody to pummel me with hexes," Draco commented sardonically. As an afterthought he added, "You weren't planning to practice any Unforgivable Curses, were you?" A playful half-smile flickered across the younger boy's face, belying his mock concern.
"That depends," Cedric countered. "Are you going to ask me who I chose for the Quidditch championship, or postulate gruesome ways I'll get obliterated in the final task? Or go back to tried and true subjects and inquire about why I haven't put the moves on Ms. Granger yet?"
Draco snorted. "Well, you're far too chivalrous to put your own name in for Seeker and the rest of the positions don't really concern me. That means the Hogwarts team is out. Dumbledore is too much of a wuss to put anything truly deadly in that maze. So even though the Beauxbatons girl and Potter may muck things up due to sheer incompetence, I'm sure you'll come out fine. And Granger?" He curled his lip in disdain. "I already have to see too much of her frizzy hair each week as it is, so I certainly don't want to talk about her in my free time. Now, Cho on the other hand …." Draco smiled mischievously.
"If I recall correctly, the last time I tried to talk about Cho, you pretended to vomit."
"I couldn't help it," Draco said in wide-eyed innocence. "I was worried you'd go into a diabetic coma if you kept spouting all that sappiness."
"Thanks for the concern," Cedric replied wryly.
"No problem. Somebody has to look out for the Hogwarts champion." They reached the side door to the castle and Cedric turned toward the stairway leading to the classrooms. He assumed Draco would return to his common room now that he was free of his groundskeeping duties, but rather than heading down in the direction of Slytherin quarters, he continued to follow Cedric.
"Wait," Cedric said. "Are you actually going to help me practice?" A cloud passed over the other boy's features. He furrowed his brow momentarily, glancing at Cedric, but then shrugged nonchalantly.
"Why not? It's bound to be more interesting than studying anyway."
"Don't be so sure. What if I decide to prepare for the task by reading about the life cycle of streeler snails?"
"Expecting a rampaging horde of them are you?" Draco asked sarcastically.
"You never know."
"Well, if you're not confident in your ability to defeat some snails, then I really ought to go change those bets I placed last week..."
"Aww, you were betting on me?" Cedric teased. "It's nice to know you care."
The Slytherin boy smiled. "Don't be so sure. You seem to forget that I am inherently self-interested. Right now you have the most points and therefore the highest chance of winning; betting on you is good for me. No caring needed."
"So then out of rational, calculated self-interest you're betting on Potter too, I assume?"
Draco snorted in contempt. "No. Potter sucks."
"Ah, flawless logic. Clearly emotions play no part in your decision-making process."
The younger boy smirked grudgingly. "I never said I didn't have emotions. We Slytherins have plenty of feelings, they're just all self-centered and Machiavellian ones."
"Ha, nice word choice. Are you practicing for a vocabulary quiz in History of Magic? If I recall correctly, Machiavelli was one of the more influential, if controversial, wizards of the Renaissance."
"Thanks professor. I was hoping for an impromptu lesson on boring trivia." Draco rolled his eyes in exaggerated irritation and Cedric laughed.
"Look out, snails will be next!" They entered one of the deserted classrooms. Draco looked around appraisingly.
"This is our Arithmancy room," Cedric explained. "Professor Vector said I could use it to practice if I wanted." He ran his hand through his hair, thinking. "I guess we could push the desks over and clear a space here in the front."
"So what spells do you want to work on, anyway?" Draco asked, flicking his wand to stack several chairs against the wall.
"I'm not sure," Cedric responded. He levitated a row of desks toward the window on the far side of the room. "Mr. Bagman was pretty vague on the details, so we could be facing anything, really. I'll probably need a whole bunch of protective spells."
"Poor Hagrid. It sounds like I'll be the one pummeling you, instead of the other way around." The Slytherin boy sent the last of the desks to rest on top of the others in the corner.
"Well, don't get too comfortable. I'm sure I'll need to work on some curses too."
Draco drew his wand and grinned. "Fire away."
It proved to be quite a useful practice session. Cedric started with some basic hexes to warm up, and moved on to more difficult spells. He was quite pleased with the progress he made on his casting of Oppugno - he was able to send all shapes and sizes of objects tearing after the other boy. Luckily Draco had quick reflexes and was able to fend them off, even the teacher's desk, although in hindsight Cedric had probably taken too big of a risk with that one.
After an hour or two, they switched roles, with Draco firing curses and Cedric warding them off. For a fourth year, Draco had a surprisingly large repertoire of harmful spells. It was helpful practice because Cedric had to be ready to constantly change his defensive strategy in creative ways, but he sincerely hoped he never had to face Draco in a duel. By the end, it was all Cedric could do to block the younger boy's attacks. His reaction times began to slow noticeably, until one spell came whizzing toward him so quickly that he barely had time to point his wand. The hex would have hit him full-on, but Draco shot a counter-curse that stopped it just in time. Cedric smiled gratefully, pausing to catch his breath. He was relieved to see the other boy was breathing heavily as well; At least he wasn't the only one who'd been challenged.
"That was intense," Cedric panted, lifting two chairs down from a stack and dropping into one in exhaustion. Draco crossed the room to join him.
"And just think, you'll get the fun of doing all that again, against giant monsters in a creepy maze." Cedric sent a broken quill zooming at the other boy's face, but Draco swatted it away, laughing.
Cedric smiled. "Hey, thanks for helping me today. You're a good guy." Draco snorted derisively. "What's so funny?"
"You're just so-" Draco stopped himself, and then paused as if searching for a word. "...idealistic."
"Idealistic?" Cedric was curious about what the other boy had been going to say. He doubted the original descriptor had been so diplomatic, but he appreciated Draco's effort at self-editing all the same. "What makes you say that?"
"Nothing." The Slytherin boy shrugged and looked at the ground, while Cedric waited expectantly. After a few moments Draco added, "It's just naive to say a person is good or bad. That's all."
"Why is it naive?" Cedric looked at Draco searchingly. "Don't you think you're a good person?" The other boy flared his nostrils and refused to meet his gaze.
"It's not about me," he replied testily. "That's not the point. It's just stupid in general. You act like it's easy to judge people, but sometimes they don't have a choice - they just are what they are and you can't change them."
"No, that is the point," Cedric earnestly responded. "I mean, nobody is born good or bad. You are defined by your choices."
The Slytherin boy snorted again and muttered acidly, "We can't all be heroes like you and Potter."
Cedric frowned. "I'm not a hero. And that's not what I mean anyway. It's not like you have to go around saving lives to be a good person. It's about all the little things you do every day - whether or not you choose to help someone with an assignment, or smile at them in the hallway, or pick up a parchment they dropped. That's what makes you a good person. Not all the rest of it. There are plenty of flashy 'heroes' out there who would probably make lousy friends, and plenty of individuals who are truly good people even though they're unrecognized or even misunderstood by the rest of the world. So yeah, maybe others think of people like 'me and Potter' as good people, but it's only because we've made conscious choices to act that way."
Cedric lapsed into silence while Draco stared darkly at the ground with his arms crossed, tapping his foot against the chair leg. Cedric should have known this would happen. He should have known better than to keep pressing the other boy, but for some reason he never was able to stop himself. It was odd because even when his opinion differed from his housemates, he never got in arguments with them. Maybe it was because he could always find a way to understand where they were coming from, but Draco was just so… different. That was probably what compelled Cedric to keep digging at issues he knew Draco didn't want to talk about - he was curious about how the other boy saw the world. And if he was truly honest with himself, he had to admit part of him was convinced that if he could get Draco to see another perspective maybe the younger boy would be slightly happier, or at least less defensive.
Cedric sighed. Draco was right; it really wasn't his place to judge. Maybe the other boy was perfectly satisfied with the way things were. But if that was the case, why did he always look so sullen? Cedric took a deep breath and willed himself to let it go.
Draco glanced fleetingly at him, biting his lip. "You make it sound so easy," he muttered.
Cedric snapped his head around to look at the other boy, surprised he had actually spoken. He paused to collect his thoughts. "It's not. Not really. Some days I'd definitely rather tell the whole world to sod off. But I guess those are the times that count the most."
"Count the most? Is there someone keeping score? I sure hope I win," Draco drawled sarcastically.
"I think you keep your own score, so you get to decide if you've won or not."
"Excellent. I'll award myself an enormous trophy that dwarfs your giant Triwizard goblet." Cedric chuckled, causing Draco to smile hesitantly before his countenance clouded again. He frowned at the floor. "It doesn't matter," he muttered, kicking absentmindedly at his book bag. "That's not how it works anyway. It would be idiotic to set up an actual game like that. Anyone could declare themselves the champion if there was no referee to say which points counted."
"You wouldn't need a referee if everyone agreed to play by a common set of rules."
"I nominate you to let Madame Hooch know she'll no longer be needed at our Quidditch matches. Don't be surprised if Slytherin happens to forget some of your utopian regulations though."
"That's the thing. It's not that Slytherin students don't know the rules, they just decide not to follow them. It's a choice, an individual choice."
"A team choice," Draco interjected.
"Maybe it feels that way, but each person on the team gets to make up their own mind about how they want to play."
Draco snorted. "I'm sure your Hufflepuffs would be thrilled if you decided to go against team strategy and do what you thought was 'right.'"
"No, probably not-"
"See, there are some decisions you don't get to make," Draco interrupted heatedly. "Sometimes, a lot of times, your moves are chosen for you before you even get a chance to find out what your options are."
"I don't think that's true." Draco narrowed his eyes and opened his mouth to interject again, but Cedric hurried on. "Yeah, in Quidditch you have team plays and strategies and such, but in each moment it is you as an individual who chooses whether or not to follow the strategy. And you just have to take your team's reaction into account when you decide how to act. I think Quidditch is an imperfect metaphor because in real life you don't have a team. You have friends and family, but when it comes right down to it your life is just yours, and your choices are too. It's sort of nice to be not connected to anyone."
"Yeah, being alone your whole life is totally awesome," Draco sniped.
Cedric smiled grudgingly. "That's not what I meant. Just, because you're ultimately independent, you have complete control over how you react to the world. And if whatever you're doing isn't working for you, you can change it."
"Right," the Slytherin boy scoffed. "It's no big deal for you to talk about changing. It's not like you'd ever need to, you're so naturally good and perfect."
"Perfect?" Cedric arched an eyebrow. "Good lord no! And not good either, not 'naturally' anyway. It's just that I've had a lot of practice acting like I'm 'good.' I'm definitely not inherently better than…" Cedric glanced at the younger boy, who was biting his lip and frowning at the floor, "than anyone else."
"How do you know that?" Draco shot. Cedric turned to look at him and the other boy took a breath and continued self-consciously. "I mean, how can you be completely certain some people aren't just…" His question trailed off into silence.
"Just bad?" Cedric finished for him. He shrugged. "I guess I'm not completely certain..." The Slytherin boy's gaze flickered to meet his in apparent surprise, but then quickly shifted away again. "You can't be completely certain about anything. But I'm pretty sure I'm right. Ninety-nine percent sure."
"Humph."
"What? Does that make me 'idealistic'?"
"No," Draco retorted. "It just makes you annoying."
Cedric smiled. "Brilliant. That's what I was going for."
A hesitant smile played across the Slytherin boy's features before he stood up and grabbed his book bag. "I should head out. I still have an essay to finish for Potions tomorrow."
Cedric rose to join him. "Right, I should finish my readings too." He slung his bag across his shoulder and followed Draco toward the door.
As they reached the threshold, Draco glanced at him. "Hey, if you ever want help practicing again, let me know."
"Better than studying?" Cedric teased.
"Yeah, inherently better," the Slytherin boy shot back, with a playful smirk. Cedric laughed and they went their separate ways down the corridor.
Looking back on it as he walked back to the common room, the whole conversation felt very surreal. Had he really just gotten into a philosophical debate with Draco Malfoy? Somehow he doubted that Draco had bargained for that when he volunteered to help him today, but apparently it hadn't turned out too badly seeing as they were still speaking to one another. Frankly, it had been a good reminder for himself as well. He kept getting so worried about the final task that it felt overwhelming, but really, as he'd kept trying to impress to the other boy, he could choose how to react. If he just took things one day at a time and did his best to prepare himself, he'd be fine. There was no sense in driving himself crazy about it. Besides, what was the worst that could happen? He was sure that no matter what he'd have to face or how poorly he performed, ultimately he'd still be all right in the end. Cedric breathed deeply, letting the idea sink in, and felt as if a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. It was quite funny, really. Six months ago he would never have guessed he'd get so many helpful ideas from the most infamously misanthropic student at Hogwarts. He'd have to remember to thank Draco again the next time he saw him.
