Jonathan's POV

"I don't know why I agreed to cook, last time I used my stove we had to call the fire department." I said to my best friend Lea as we roamed the market.

"Yeah, I thought about that too. So I'm just going to come over early and cook and then leave before he gets there."

"God bless you, Lea Michele."

Later that evening.

"Okay, everything is ready to go," said Lea. "When he gets here just put the pasta in your nicest bowls and pur him a glass of water. Good luck, my love! Let me know what happenes as soon as he leaves." Lea gave me a quick peck on the cheek before she walked out the door.

6:58. He could be here any minute. I haven't even thought about what I'm going to say to him. I'm not even positive I won't cry when he gets to the door. Please stay strong, Jon. Don't let him think you've lost your dignity.

Either way, I hope he get's here soon. I'm starving and Lea is an incredible cook. It's 7 now, and the buzzer rings almost as if it were on cue. I go to press the button to unlock the door and wait the excruciating 30 seconds it would take him to get to my apartment. I'm counting down the seconds until he knocks on my door.

When he finally does, the knock is so weak you could almost hear it saying "I don't want to be here." I open the door and Lin is standing there. Blue jeans and a white t-shirt. It makes me happier that he at least felt like he could dress comfortably. He's still standing at the door.

"Hi, Jonathan." He says to me, the softness of his voice is deafening.

"Hi, Lin. Please, come in. Make yourself at home."

He nods at me and walks inside. He looks around at my small apartment, thinking about something but he doesn't say a word. I close the door and walk into the kitchenette. I follow Lea's serving instructions and show Lin to the dining table.

"This looks delicious," says Lin forcing a smile. "I didn't know you cook."

"Uh, yeah, I dabble a little bit in culinary arts." I say trying to lighten the mood. The fact that Lea made the food wasn't something he needed know.

How is this conversation going to start? The whole reason he came over here was to talk about what happened. But who is going to talk first? What would I even say? I take a deep breath and start speaking, hoping it all comes out right.

"So," we both say at the same time. I guess he was thinking the same thing as me. We both giggle a little bit.

"You first." I say to Lin. It'd be better if he went first anyway.

"Okay," he starts. "I'm at a very weird point in my life right now, Jon. I have never had these feelings for a man before and I don't know how to deal with them. I kissed you on an impulse without even thinking about whether or not it was the right thing to do or if you even felt the same way. That's why I ran off. I've never kissed a man like that before and everything happened so fast that I didn't know what to do except get out of there as soon as possible."

This is what I expected him to say, Lea was right about how he was feeling. I listen intently and whole heartedly as he continues.

"I've had a few night to really reflect on the whole situation and Jon I realized that these feelings are here and they aren't going away. I don't know where they came from or why they decided to show up so late into my life but I'm starting to not feel so afraid of them I just need your help. I need your help progressng with my new discovery, for lack of better terms."

There are so many thoughts in my head right now. He said so much to me so quickly I don't even know where to start to form a response. I clear my head and let my mouth do the talking and hope it goes in my favor.

"I was 13 when I first started having those feelings. My best friend Lea was there for me through every stage of my self discovery . She helped me come out to my friends and she was there when I came out to my parents. So I know how important it is to have someone there for you. I will be there for you through this, Lin. Whole heartedly." I see tears starting to well up in his eyes. "I don't want us to be anything more than friends right now, though. I think you just need a friend without any complications."

Lin smiles at me and nods in agreement. We both stand up and wrap one another in a warm embrace. He's lost control of his tears and I'm holding him so tight, so safe, so lovingly and I won't let go until he isnt sad anymore.

"Thank you." he says to me. "Thank you so much."